Born Again Christians Thread-No Bashing please

[Beastlover]

I, too have been lurking...kinda felt like it was a conversation already started and didn't want to butt-in...

Anyway, we have been attending a Lutheran Church (traditional) in our town. The pastor is wonderful, and my DH is a Stephen Minister for 3 years now. (he is a leader) Our church participated in the Purpose Driven Life series, and the small group was meeting at our house. After that, we decided we really enjoyed our small group, and moved on with the Book of James study...that was very successful, too.

The problem lies in the Purpose Driven life series, though. My DH and his "group" set up a Missions Fair at our church. My DH is an Environmental Engineer (water and wastewater) and found a Mission to set up at the church. It brings wells to third world countries for fresh drinking water. I believe, it is like $900/well. His team brought the mission to the pastor and they have been met with red tape. Seems the church is concerned with the issue of people tithing a certain percent, and then along comes these other missions, and the church tithing goes down.

My DH has been very disappointed that this program was brought, pushed to complete the series, and almost like...."no no no, we wouldn't want to do that" idealogy...very disheartening.

So, there are some other issues we have noticed, but this being the most prevalent. We attended another church Sunday. It is a contemporary service...it was WONDERFUL. They sent their H.S. kids on MISSION to the streets of Philadelphia and Central Mexico...that was cool to hear their stories!! It was by far, the most inspiring sermon I have ever listened to. We really enjoy this place, and want to give it more visits, time, etc. to see if it really is what it appears to be. We understand that all churches have their flaws. We met with friends that go there, and discussed some of their activities, etc...

Anybody else ever be very involved with a church, and then decide you are leaving? How did you go about doing it? We feel like we are "cheating"...

 

[luvthatduke]

Hi again, Beastlover - it's ok to lurk if you don't
feel like "talking." *smile*

That is a shame about your DH and the mission.
My DH and I have seen that happen with other churches,
where we get so frustrated that the elders or pastor
are too wrapped up in the earthly abilities/temptations
of people, and don't give any focus or credit to God's
ability (which of course is unfathomable!) or the work
He wants to do through His Spirit.
It becomes a tightrope, tho, where church leadership
is sincere in being good stewards - I can appreciate their struggle.
But, it doesn't seem right that they pushed through
the water well mission only to have a change of heart.
I understand your DH's frustration.
Just pray about where God wants you,
staying/leaving a church is always a confusing
and distressing decision,
eta: when we're not sure where God is leading us.

 

[Grandma Bear]

Beastlover I feel it is important to follow the leadership of the Holy Spirit! Christ told us to go out into the Highways and bring people into the church. If you feel lead to do this work; you must follow God's call. Outreach is a very important part of serving God. We as Christians are to love one another
and by sharing that love we are a powerful witness to who we are in Christ;
andwho Christ is in our lives.

 

[Albertan mom]

Beastlover-
I know what you mean about feeling like you are cheating when you leave a church. When we moved to this town, we started attending an Alliance church. It was good for the first year and a half, but then it wasn't meeting our needs. There was no children in that church, so no childrens programs (though I did try to get one going!) and we had two small kids at the time. We really wanted our kids to meet other kids before they started school. But we felt guilty about leaving. So when our pastor resigned to move to another church, we took that as an opportunity to leave also. We started attending the Baptist church, and there is tons of kids here! It met the needs that we had. I see you have a teenage daughter-it is essential that she gets the programs and teaching she needs at this very critical time in her life.
I think you need to attend where it works best for you and your family. All the best to you in your decision making!

 

[phillybeth]

They sent their H.S. kids on MISSION to the streets of Philadelphia and Central Mexico...that was cool to hear their stories!!

Just curious, why Philly?

 

[live4christp1]

Just wanted to say thanks again to all of you for your prayers last week. Saturday our pastor called and asked DH if he and I would do a children's program during the month of August on Sunday nights, ages 5-10. DH was excited and said yes but told him we would be out of town this passed Sunday but happy to start it the next week.

So I have been looking for some material to use. We have Awana on Wednesday, have done the Word of Life Olympian program in children's church on Sunday morning.....so I want something exciting.....over teaching the same stories again and again in the same fashion really looses the kids attention. The Hands on Bible Curriculum looks good but the book store didn't have it. Found several things I'd like to try....maybe incorporate it into children's church in the mornings. Noah's Park looked interesting too......still haven't decided for sure, will let DH look over some sample lessons I downloaded today. KidsKount Publishing had some good things as well.

Anyone have any suggestions? We will be working in about a 45 minute time frame, probably 35-45 kids.

 

[MrSpencer]

Just curious, why Philly?

Great question...I don't know... they just had pictures on the jumbo screens of the teens meeting with all kinds of people...is there an abundance of homeless? I don't know....

 

[Grandma Bear]

Yes there is a great number of homeless in all major cities and constantly growing! We receive numerous mail outs monthly from several downtown missions asking for money, clothing, and volunteers!

 

[lmhall2000]

Beastlover....I've been there...and I have a philosophy on it...God truly has molded me in my life (yes, I've made conscious decisions that have created circumstances that affected it, but God has known ahead of time what I was going to do and (well with in a parentheses I could go on and on and get more confused ) but I truly believe God knows where I've been and where I'm going) and when I have met something at a church that I don't feel is led by faith (rather ego or self-protection or basically lack in faith)...then I think God is calling me elsewhere...

My husband and I were both leaders in a youth program (Awana)...our church originally started out going up to 6th grade...well after a few years you have dozens of children wanting to continue to the higher grades so we petitioned the elders to consider letting us add grades (we had the volunteers)...but they had a youth minister that had a different "vision" for the youth...he could not accept a new program taking some of "his" youth away from "his" program...his was very centered on rock Christian music and bringing unchurched youth in...he was trying to make it as cool as possible and I knew that is was a great program but there was a group of children who did not like it because it was more of a "social" scene and they lost the scripture memory and game time with Awana...the church had over 6,000 members...I just felt there was room for both. The pastor left it up to the youth minister's discretion and therefore it became a bone of contention....the youth pastor never even looked at the Awana program for 7-8th graders...he just said his program was the only one and would stay that way. So we left...we were blessed in leaving and found wonderful new friends and paths to cross that led to more amazing things...some families stayed and eventually they got a new youth minister who approved the upper grades...but for us it was the right thing to do. (to leave)

Go in prayer and you'll feel his urging...He's given your husband a passion for this well ministry..I think he should find a way to meet it.

Tara

 

[Beastlover]

Now, on the same subject...

I have felt spiritually "numb"....kinda going thru the motions. Every Sunday, during the sermon, my mind wanders...shopping lists, what to do this week, etc...

Enter this one-time church experience. It was truly the first time I sat riveted to the sermon. 45 minute sermon...and I was entranced. I am excited to go back.

I have shared these feelings with my DH and he agrees, but also has that "cheating" thing going on. I read him all the replies and he agrees. He is very spiritually connected, and understands how I feel.

I am definately going to pray about this...

 

[acrucifer]

[

Anybody else ever be very involved with a church, and then decide you are leaving? How did you go about doing it? We feel like we are "cheating"... [/QUOTE]


yes. I was very involved in the Episcopal church near my home and held several positions of ministry, i.e. lay reader, crucifer, chalice bearer etc and I also served as church warden for several years. the problems began when the church called in a new pastor who was openly Gay and a feminist. some church members vehemently objected to hiring her as our priest and left the church while others quietly left. I continued to support her because that was my job as warden. I watched as she aliented many men and some women. I began to have severe reservations about the way she was dividing the church. It became clear to me that the changes she made were in keeping with the feminsit - gay agenda she brought with her to our church. the two long time gay male members of our church couldnt stand it and left. thats when I started to wonder what was going on here and I realized we made a mistake in calling her to be our priest. it was painful to watch church members who had been congregants for 50 years leaving the church, and quite a few did. I prayed for many months about this and repeatedly asked God for direction and discernment and he led me to the Church where I was saved last October. I now feel a closeness to Christ and His Word that was lacking before and of course I continue to work on my relationship with him. I have such a long way to go. I have been reluctant to become too involved in the new church, but I feel this will fade in time. the Pastor there is terrific and is a faithful servant of Christ. I do believe he would like to save the entire nation and then the world. anyway, the most difficult part of my decision was leaving some of the people behind at the episcopal church who I had grown close too. one of them died last week and I am feeling ambivelant about whether or not I should go to the memorial service. Anyway, although some people will not like reading this, I strongly believe that God was leading away from the episcopal church because of the blasphemy and heresy being preached by the Gay priest. I could not reconcile her openly Gay lifestyle with Christs teachings, and when I asked her if she could,, she declined to answer. so, thats part of my journey. by the way, I was good friends with the male gay couple at the episcopal church and do not believe in any way that God dislikes ANYONE. however, IMHO and I believe this is Christs teaching, a openly and active Gay Priest is not consistent with the Gospels or with Christs message. so, I do apologize if I offended anyone, thats not my intent.

 

[pogopossum]

b-l, if you feel that God is leading you to another place to serve then there is no cheating going on. you also have to go where your own needs are met as well.

at our church if we let the fact that peoplse weren't tithing hold us up we would never go anywhere for missions or help start other churches in places that need them. i think that if a church is honest with themselves they have to admit that while the tithe is the ideal, for a variety of reasons people don't always meet that ideal, and to not do mission because of that is not the best solution. our congregation doesn't even average the tithe on a poverty level income, which is sad, but in 26 years we have only not made budget once, and we have completed at least 5 building programs and have just undertaken a new one with most of the money allocated "beyond our walls" as it is called to a number of partnership churches all over the world. i am not trying to sell tithing short, but to limit your outreach because you feel that tithing will decrease is certainly a shame.

 

[shelly3girls]

When I was in school many years ago there was a missionary opportunity for teens to go into the Logan area of Philadelphia to help run a summer program. The program offered tutoring and other services focusing on bringing in preteens off the streets during the summer.

 

[Beastlover]

When I was in school many years ago there was a missionary opportunity for teens to go into the Logan area of Philadelphia to help run a summer program. The program offered tutoring and other services focusing on bringing in preteens off the streets during the summer.

That sounds cool....again... I am not sure if that is what they did, but the youth were very excited about going.

 

[Aidensmom]

Beastlover - you need to go wherever Christ leads. All of Christianity is one big church, you are not cheating in any way by leaving a particular congregation. I do know how you feel though, I recently was faced with the same kind of decision myself. I had been going to the same church for about 10 years, actually was one of the original members of the church when it began, was a co-leader of a small group for many years, along with being a host home for that group. I also taught our Jr. High Sunday School class for quite a while. A little over a year ago, our pastor got divorced. This caused a lot of strife within the congregation, and the pastor was asked to leave. As great of a guy I think the new pastor is, I just didn't feel right there anymore, ended up skipping church a lot of the time (It is 20 miles away too, so it could get easy to come up with an excuse), and just was not getting out of it what I needed to. During that time I also had a problem with something that happened in my son's Sunday School class that caused him to not want to go back to class (he attended service with me after that, at age 3). I really was no longer happy there, but had a hard time making a decision to find somewhere else to go, I felt like that was my church and where I was supposed to be, after all, I was one of the ones that helped to build it. The divorced pastor then started a new church. I realize the Bible says it is a sin to get divorced, but I also know God forgives us. Not to mention I am divorced too (and re-married). And I know that this pastor really has a heart for unbelievers, to really show them God's love and acceptance, and that was what our church had always been about when he was pastor, but no longer was quite the same. I decided to go to his new church and have been there about 3 months now. I am again very much involved with it, doing some of the administrative work. And I, my husband, and my son all look very forward to going every week. To us, being in the atmosphere of acceptance of all people is what Jesus really is about, so we are very happy with our decision.

 

[WDWHound]

HI folks,
Would you please take a few moments click on the link below to another DIS Thread and see if you any suggestions to offer? Thanks.
We need your help

 

[Aidensmom]

HI folks,
Would you please take a few moments click on the link below to another DIS Thread and see if you any suggestions to offer? Thanks.
We need your help

I wish I knew of something, I definately will see if I can find anything.

 

[live4christp1]

WDWHOUND - If you are going to have enough packages to fill a truck, maybe check with a container line - sometimes they will donate a container box to ship. Your congregation should pray for God to provide the right means and He will work it out, I have seen this happen many times at our church and with other ministries I am familiar with.

Hello everyone else! Joseph Stowell, on Proclaim, is doing a reair of one of my favorite series he has done, it's called Sizzleland. You can listen online here http://www.oneplace.com/Ministries/Proclaim/ - later in the series it goes on to talk about the 4 men (Jim Elliott, Nate, and a couple of other men) who died while working the mission field to some indians in South America....it is an excellent series, I need to order it so I will have it.

Anyone else listen to Bible teachers/preachers via radio? Whose your favorite?

 

[live4christp1]

Hi Everyone!

We had a great Wednesday night service. We have been going through the book Exodus and studying the 10 commandments......last night was Honour your Father and Mother. Our pastor used many verses to explain honour from a Biblical perspective. To honour means to be obedient, to put someone before yourself, to show respect too......it was very good. He even touched on how we are commanded to honour those in authority over us and it made me think about how we might not always agree with what our elected officials do, we are still to honour them and shouldn't speak disrespectfully of them. Made me remember a speaker that was at Founders Week at MBI one year, it was the year Clinton had been re-elected and lots of the Christian community were upset.....etc. He made a good point that God wasn't surprised that he was re-elected, He wasn't sitting up in heaven wringing His hands (like some of us tend to do) thinking well what am I going to do now. That He may have him in that position to further along His purpose. He said it way better than I can........just thought I'd share.

How was everyone elses' midweek service, Bible study, prayer meeting, etc?

 

[ead79]

Hello everyone!

I sing in my church’s choir (yep, it’s me and all the old ladies, LOL!), and we just previewed our Christmas music last night at rehearsal. Some of it is really wonderful, especially a new arrangement of “Mary, Did You Know.” I’m excited about doing the program—I always look forward to the Christmas season, even in August apparently, LOL!

live4Christp1, yep I’m from Marietta, which is just north of Atlanta. Next time you’re around we should meet!

Michelle, I’m so sorry to hear about your church’s reaction to the well idea. I can totally understand why you don’t approve of that approach to missions. I hope you are able to find a church home that really focuses on missions—it sounds like the one you tried is a very good place to start! I know what you mean about being somewhere that you’re just going through the motions. Just follow the Spirit’s leadings.