Behavior of some children in the parks

[noopy]

My dd and I couldn't believe some of the behavior we witnessed at the parks last week! As a parent and a teacher, the way some parents were allowing their kids to behave was unbelievable! We saw children physically hurting one another - slapping, kicking, and punching their brothers/sisters. Their parents tended to look the other way, or respond with a simple "stop" or "be nice". While I can fathom such a response for smaller behaviors, physical harm should never be tolerated. It's no wonder some of my students are numb to hurting others. I once had a parent respond that at least her child didn't cause permanent damage to a classmate when she punched him in the back! It seems that it's okay to hurt someone as long as they can recover, or as long as you don't really mean it.
Honestly, if my child did that, she would have a consequence - not getting on the ride, or sitting out the next one or two with a time out on a bench. I'd also prepare her for future consequences: each time it happens, that's 15 minutes of pool time lost sitting on a chair, or none at all.
Children learn right and wrong from adults. Parents should put their responsibility to raise their children to be decent, humane, and moral people first. The "I don't feel like dealing with it" attitude is irresponsible. I'm a single parent - if I can discipline my children by myself, so can the many 2 parent families we saw allowing their children to be mean to, and hurt, others.

 

[wilderness01]

 

[Amy&Dan]

I mostly notice just how some parents allow their children to be so inconsiderate. Pushing their way forward in lines to see shows etc. We were at MK in February and had gotten a bench just across from Crystal Palace. Perfect for fireworks since the fence allows nobody to get in front of you. Just before the show started this kid, maybe 7 or 8 just comes up and stands on our bench. Literally standing on a bench we were sitting on. I had told my son to get up to make room for an elderly lady to sit and this kid trampled her to stand there. He then proceeds to scream for his parents to join him at the top of his lungs. This continued the whole show. I think so many people feel like they are spending so much money to go to WDW that by God they and their kids will do whatever it takes to take it all in. Add to that the amount of sugar kids (including mine!) ingest, the heat, the crowds and the excitement and you will certainly see some extreme behavior. I try not to judge the kids since it is really the parents fault. It does get frustrating and I just try to not make my kids the subject of somebody's post on disboards!!

 

[ktink]

ITA. My children would suffer the same consequences. And after they miss some rides and pool time, you probably won't have to worry about it happening again.

 

[tazdeb]

When I see children really missbehaving, I reprimand them(in a nice way). This usually startles them into behaving, or they run to thier parents who then realize how bad their kids were getting. Most of the time I think parents are just overwhelmed/overtired/overwrought by the Disney expierience. These thing tend to happen late in the day. On very rare occaisions Ive had the parents confront me. I keep calm and say that I didnt want their child to get hurt or to hurt anyone else. Most times the parents are embarrased, but sometimes I get a lecture. In which case I explain that I'm sorry,the next time I wont reprimend them, I'll get Disney personel do it. Actually, Ive had more problems dealing with rude adults than children at the parades etc......

 

[Feralpeg]

After seeing the Nanny and Nanny 911, nothing surprises me. I would not have believed that parents tolerate such things until I saw those shows. Amazing.

 

[Shagley]

I work part time in a Toy department in a retail store. I see kids terribly misbehaving all the time, and the parents just ignore them. I have decided that if the parents aren't going to do anything about it, then I will nicely reprimand their child for them. I only do this if they are doing something that could potentially harm, because the store I work at would be liable for any injuries, even if it is the child's own fault. I have noticed that if I nicely reprimand the child, the parent gets embarrassed and then finally says something to the child (or takes the child and leaves which is fine with me too).

The other day, I had some kids playing basketball in the toy section. They were pushing and shoving each other, and taking shots from 4 aisles away to see if they could make it into the basket. When I walked over there to tell them to stop, I saw that their father was right in the middle of the game. Nothing like teaching your kids how to misbehave by showing them.

I can only imagine how much worse this must be at WDW

 

[Disney Gator]

I agree with tazdeb about parents being much worse. I can't understand the parents pushing strollers who just run into you or push past you with the stroller and don't say anything. No "excuse me" or "I'm sorry", nothing. I guess they think since they are pushing a big stroller around they can just do whatever they want.

I realize it's crowded and it can be tough with a big stroller, but I've had people slam into my leg with a stroller and they just keep on going. You wonder where the kids learn the rude behavior?

 

[karynnix]

All that you can do is teach your children to be respectable and hope that others learn by your example. My kids are 5 and 6 and they already know that others are watching them. If you do the right thing, chances are, others will do the same. I can't control someone else's kid, but I can make sure that mine are on the right path!

 

[lomillerin]

I have typically well behaved children. My son-12 is a straight A student and has won student of the month 3 times this school year alone and there are 550 students in his grade alone. My daughter is 6 and usually very good.
BUT, they are not perfect.
There have been a few incidents that my kids did not behave as they should have. NO, they never would stand on a bench where other people were sitting and yell to me.
But, my son occasionally has teased his sister one too many times and she has gotten really mad at him and both behaved badly. Which I am sure none of your "perfect" kids have ever done.... If this is the first time this happens, they do just get a warning-"you two need to get along and be nice or we will leave" for example. Then, we move on with our fun.

Maybe, you should all stop judging parents when you are only seeing one or two incidents, unless you are following them around and if you are following them-well, get a life...

I am very strict with my kids, and they regulary get compliments when we are out in public, but I have experienced days when they were not behaving.
If your kids are always perfect, I have a feeling they are just afraid of you and will not grow up to be self confident, and independent people.

 

[drakethib]

My dd and I couldn't believe some of the behavior we witnessed at the parks last week! As a parent and a teacher, the way some parents were allowing their kids to behave was unbelievable! We saw children physically hurting one another - slapping, kicking, and punching their brothers/sisters. Their parents tended to look the other way, or respond with a simple "stop" or "be nice". While I can fathom such a response for smaller behaviors, physical harm should never be tolerated. It's no wonder some of my students are numb to hurting others. I once had a parent respond that at least her child didn't cause permanent damage to a classmate when she punched him in the back! It seems that it's okay to hurt someone as long as they can recover, or as long as you don't really mean it.
Honestly, if my child did that, she would have a consequence - not getting on the ride, or sitting out the next one or two with a time out on a bench. I'd also prepare her for future consequences: each time it happens, that's 15 minutes of pool time lost sitting on a chair, or none at all.
Children learn right and wrong from adults. Parents should put their responsibility to raise their children to be decent, humane, and moral people first. The "I don't feel like dealing with it" attitude is irresponsible. I'm a single parent - if I can discipline my children by myself, so can the many 2 parent families we saw allowing their children to be mean to, and hurt, others.

The name of this thread should be "Parents misbehaving in the parks".

Since they are letting their kids act like this, who is to blame, the kids or the parents? I blame the parents, I really don't care if the parents are tired from the parks or not, they should not let their kids act in such a manner. (Waiting for the flames)

I am 33 years old and I can assure you, even as an adult, if I were to act up in public, and my mother was around, I would probably get a smack upside the head right then and there in front of all to see.

"Act up in public, get punished in public" mom used to say.

When I was growing up, getting "time out" was not an option.

 

[karynnix]

Amen!!

 

[eeyore kelly]

I work in a children's store, nothing surprises me anymore.

 

[foxfire]

You see so much bad behavior these days. I can't count how many times I've heard a parent tell a child to stop or so & so will happen. It never does & the kids know it's an idle threat so they continue with the bad behavior. Then, you have the parents that turn a blind eye & don't even bother with so much as an idle threat. I'm not sure which is worse.

I make a special effort to comment when a child behaves well, complimenting both the parents and the child. Good manners & good behavior was once the norm & expected from a child. Sadly, it doesn't seem to be with many these days.

 

[Deb & Bill]

...If your kids are always perfect, I have a feeling they are just afraid of you and will not grow up to be self confident, and independent people...

Why would you say that? Doesn't that make you just as judgmental as you are saying some of the other posters are?

I don't think the OP said his/her kids are perfect. He/she just noticed how undisciplined some kids appeared to be and some parents failed to take care of the problem.

 

[donaldsgal]

i agree Deb and Bill....

I find it frustrating when people read too much into what posters are saying. If you disagree, find another thread or send a PM. don't subject everyone to a public blasting of the OP or anyone else. we should all be respectful of one another in terms of how we treat them and how we talk about them... which is sort of the point that the OP was making. some parents and kids (i'm a counselor - kids do know what they're doing a lot of the time but still deserve respect and compassion like everyone else) are just inconsiderate, and there's nothing wrong with commenting on that. no one is a bad person - some people just make bad choices. that's all the OP and the others are saying.

i'm sure you are a good mother, and your advice is well-taken. do not judge. no better advice than that! but also don't put words in the mouths of your fellow disney lovers.

**************
I didn't mean that as a counselor I know kids know what they are doing... duh. what i meant was kids need to be held accountable for their behavior just like adults do. with appropriate consequences of course. don't sentence them to walk the plank for stepping on another person's foot, but an "I'm sorry" or "excuse me" goes a long way.

Forgive me for misspeaking. My brain moves faster than my fingers sometimes.
****************

Have a happy day everyone,
Jenny

 

[disneyaggie]

I cant' decide who is worse . . . the little kids . . . or the bigger ones (the parents!). Sometimes I want to put both sizes in time out!

 

[noopy]

I have typically well behaved children. My son-12 is a straight A student and has won student of the month 3 times this school year alone and there are 550 students in his grade alone. My daughter is 6 and usually very good.
BUT, they are not perfect.
There have been a few incidents that my kids did not behave as they should have. NO, they never would stand on a bench where other people were sitting and yell to me.
But, my son occasionally has teased his sister one too many times and she has gotten really mad at him and both behaved badly. Which I am sure none of your "perfect" kids have ever done.... If this is the first time this happens, they do just get a warning-"you two need to get along and be nice or we will leave" for example. Then, we move on with our fun.

Maybe, you should all stop judging parents when you are only seeing one or two incidents, unless you are following them around and if you are following them-well, get a life...

I am very strict with my kids, and they regulary get compliments when we are out in public, but I have experienced days when they were not behaving.
If your kids are always perfect, I have a feeling they are just afraid of you and will not grow up to be self confident, and independent people.

I am speaking primarily of the physical harm that we saw parents overlooking. No, my daughter isn't perfect, but I will say, she doesn't hit, slap, or punch anyone. Maybe some day she will, but she has been taught from the beginning that it is absolutely unacceptable to physically hurt anyone unless you are in a position of having to defend yourself from being physically hurt. I don't care that I may be seeing one incident - physically harming another person is wrong and should always be treated as such.
Let me ask everyone, including lomillerin, what you would want me to do if your child was physically hurt in my classroom by another student? It doesn't matter what action occurred, your child's body was touched inappropriately and he/she was hurt. Would you have me give the other child a warning and then request that this child learn to "get along"? I doubt it. Most likely, you would want the school to teach the other child that his/her action will not be tolerated so that your child won't be hurt again. As a teacher, I will not allow any student to physically harm another, nor will our school. Why would I accept it as a parent? I would be equally as strict in my words and actions if my son hit my daughter.
Perhaps lomillerin is talking about small incidents, like name-calling. I don't teach children to fear me. I teach them respect, for me and for others. I don't care if they're having a bad day - I'm not going to show disrespect for another person because I'm having a bad day. That's no excuse.
One more thing...I'm glad your child does fine in school, but as a veteran teacher, that has absolutely nothing to do with his behavior. I have taught straight A, award-winning kids who can be disrespectful to their peers, and sometimes to their parents and teachers, and I have taught below grade level students who are sweet and respectful. As others have said, it's the parenting that determines a child's character. Grades, awards, and the comments of other people are not factors in the end.

 

[Eeyore'sthebest]

For those of you that have ever wanted to say something to a parent of a misbehaving child, my DM finally did.
She was working in a candy kiosk at the mall. A little boy was banging on the glass. She asked the mother to stop him so he wouldn't break it (and possibly hurt himself). The mother actually told my DM that she worked full time and didn't spend that much time with him so she really felt guilty reprimanding him.
And my DM's witty comeback, with a sickening sweet smile - "Then don't you worry. The courts will take care of that for you in about 15 years."
DM didn't make a sale to that woman.

Sometimes no matter how much you try to hold your tongue the little devil just pops right out of your mouth.

 

[Brianne]

Well, we were in Cosmic Ray's last night---if you've been in there, you know how loud it can be, especially right near the "entertainer". Amazingly enough, we were able to hear a kid's temper tantrum over the din. It must've last a good 10 minutes or more, with mom just sitting there eating like nothing was wrong!

Ok, yes, it's loud in there. Very loud. But when people can hear your child over the noise, there's something seriously wrong there. The child should've been removed & dealt with!

I'm always amazed by the number of meltdowns we see every time we're there---parents just push their kids to the absolute limits, it seems. And it looks like they push themselves too, because I can't tell you the number of people I saw asleep on benches or at tables last night! If you're that tired, either go back to your hotel or go home!! JMHO, but yikes. I wish I were exaggerating.