Autistic child and puberty!

[pls5286]

I have a question for the autistic parents out there. My DSS will be 14 in about 2 weeks. With the onset of teenage years, we have the onset of puberty and the problem that his body is out-growing his mind. Mentally, he is about 10ish. While he has made great strides in his school and behavior problems, we know he is not up to the "Birds and the Bees" talk that we had with our oldest. It is too far out of his reach.

DH and I are worried that someone will tell him things that he does not understand and/or take advantage of him because of his mental status. He goes to a school for kids with behavior problems--He has ADHD, ODD, bipolar and rage-anger syndrome in addition to Autism. There are some kids in that school who would take advantage of not just him, but other kids too.

How did you handle the talk and what he is going through with your child?

 

[WheeledTraveler]

Can you modify the talk you gave your older child?

Does he at least know the basics of "private parts are private" and "this is where babies come from"? If those still need to be addressed, you could look at the advice for talking to younger kids. They're concepts that can be taught to kids under 5 so if he has an understanding level similar to that of a 10 year old, he can get them.

Growing up the class that included sex ex was one of the few classes where the school mainstreamed everyone. That class started at age 10 (there was a prior thing that was split up by girls & guys that happened in forth grade, but it was about 2 or 3 afternoons, but was also mainstreamed). We had several kids with ASD, ADHD, and other developmental or severe learning disabilities in the section I was in. While I'm sure they didn't understand everything (the teacher did put effort into trying to make sure they understood, but there's no way that I would know how much they retained after the class was over), it put the info out there for them. The class covered both the medical explanations (not the full biology info about mitosis, but medical terminology for the genitals, inside and out, and general "this is what happens") and discussions of slang terms. You certainly don't need to do all that, but even if he doesn't understand it now, it starts the repetition that will lead to him understanding in the future.

 

[AJKMOM]

I would think the the basic parts" this is your______", if he doesn't already know that.

Then you move on to the "No one except a doctor and you can touch that" would be a way to start.

My son never much progressed part about age 5, so he was never alone with anyone, or in the general school population long enough to be bullied or taken advantage of.