Attire - Mother of the Groom

[lorimay]

That dress is beautiful and looks fantastic on you!!!

Can you see if the designer offers it any other colors?

 

[bellarella]

I think there are two general rules for wedding attire, and the apply even more so for the MOB and MOG:

1. Do not wear a dress that could be worn as a bridal gown.
2. Do not wear a dress that, when someone walks into the reception and scans the room, causes them to pick you out of the crowd.

I'm afraid the dress you chose violates rule 1. It is off-white and lace, basically a less formal bridal gown. Surely white/off-white isn't the only color of dress you wear at other events. I'd keep looking.

 

[design_mom]

The dress is gorgeous, but I agree with others that it's too "bridal" looking.

To be honest, at first I skimmed your post. I saw "it's going to be an informal wedding.." and then the picture. I thought the picture was of the bride's dress, not yours.

I think it would be very pretty in another color if it's available... or, could this dress be dyed?

 

[threeboysmom]

Thanks everyone for your honest reviews. I'll keep looking. I did have reservations about it so glad I asked. There's got to be something else out there I will love hopefully.

 

[ilovejack02]

Dress is so cute .. what a great dress for spring and summer events.. just not wedding. : )

 

[Disney Doll]

So many great suggestions and experiences and pictures! Thanks!

This is a pretty informal wedding - it's being held at a local library (they both are huge book lovers), but it's at night too... so that confuses me.

Anyways... colors are light blue and gray. Nobody has picked out dresses yet so I'm not quite sure if the bridal party is even going to be wearing full length or not...

I asked my son - he said wear whatever, LOL. Yeah right. I have never met the fiance. They are 1500 miles away. I'll probably have to contact her on Facebook, but I think based on what I know about her, she is not going to care what I wear. But I still want to be "safe" and not start off our relationship on the wrong foot.

I found this dress yesterday which I LOVE, but it's ivory so I'm hesitant that it's too close to white ? I did find another dress in a steel gray which would blend really nice with the wedding colors, but I love the ivory dress more and I would definitely wear it again for other occasions.

Is ivory inappropriate? I know it's not the "traditional" look of a mother of the groom, lol, but I just can't see myself in a beaded jacket type of dress.

Nope. Between being ivory and looking lacy, I wouldn't wear it to my son's wedding. Too close to "wedding dress".

The steel gray one sounds nice. Or look for something in a navy blue. Does this dress you like come in navy? If it did, then I think it would be fine. It is a pretty dres. It's the combination of ivory and lacy-looking that's the problem. Or would you be willing/able to dye it????

 

[bdcp]

My son got married yesterday evening and the dress code was cocktail attire and I wore a light mocha dress with a chiffon skirt and sequined/lace top and jacket. MOB wore a teal lace dress with sequins. MOH wore a green and white lace dress. All three dresses had the flower lace you see everywhere right now. Peacock was the colors so we all were fine. I agree with not ever wearing white/ivory to a wedding unless you're the bride. We had a fabulous time and we adore our new DIL and her family.

 

[Janepod]

Nope. Between being ivory and looking lacy, I wouldn't wear it to my son's wedding. Too close to "wedding dress".

The steel gray one sounds nice. Or look for something in a navy blue. Does this dress you like come in navy? If it did, then I think it would be fine. It is a pretty dres. It's the combination of ivory and lacy-looking that's the problem. Or would you be willing/able to dye it????

Very pretty dress but totally wrong for a wedding.

But definitely buy it! Maybe for the rehearsal dinner?

 

[mrsg00fy]

The ivory dress is lovely but too bridish. (not sure if that is a word).

That said, when I got married, there was no discussion of the MOB or MOG dresses....and I did plan down to the last detail. It never even occurred to me that I should have any say in their dresses. My bridal party wore mauve. My mother wore ivory and gold. Groom's mom wore turquoise. Everyone looked great!

I have two sons and when they do get married, I have no intention of asking for permission or coordinating with the MOB.

I am a middle aged woman and finding ANY dress that looks good is a challenge enough! I won't wear white or any color that would be a problem with the bride...but I sure will NOT be too concerned with the color of the bridal pary or the MOB and will not ask for permission from the bride to wear any color I choose.

 

[bdcp]

The ivory dress is lovely but too bridish. (not sure if that is a word).

That said, when I got married, there was no discussion of the MOB or MOG dresses....and I did plan down to the last detail. It never even occurred to me that I should have any say in their dresses. My bridal party wore mauve. My mother wore ivory and gold. Groom's mom wore turquoise. Everyone looked great!

I have two sons and when they do get married, I have no intention of asking for permission or coordinating with the MOB.

I am a middle aged woman and finding ANY dress that looks good is a challenge enough! I won't wear white or any color that would be a problem with the bride...but I sure will NOT be too concerned with the color of the bridal pary or the MOB and will not ask for permission from the bride to wear any color I choose.

Good luck with that

Fortunately my new DIL wasn't concerned, but I hate to tell you a lot are. You don't want to get on the bad side of your future DIL because if your son has to choose, he will (and should) choose her.

 

[tar heel]

The ivory dress is lovely but too bridish. (not sure if that is a word).

That said, when I got married, there was no discussion of the MOB or MOG dresses....and I did plan down to the last detail. It never even occurred to me that I should have any say in their dresses. My bridal party wore mauve. My mother wore ivory and gold. Groom's mom wore turquoise. Everyone looked great!

I have two sons and when they do get married, I have no intention of asking for permission or coordinating with the MOB.

I am a middle aged woman and finding ANY dress that looks good is a challenge enough! I won't wear white or any color that would be a problem with the bride...but I sure will NOT be too concerned with the color of the bridal pary or the MOB and will not ask for permission from the bride to wear any color I choose.

Please tell me your sons are little. Why would you want to intentionally try to cause a problem?

 

[tar heel]

OP - I also think the dress is gorgeous but not appropriate for a wedding unless you can get another color.

Like some other people have mentioned, I don't think I'll be in a beaded lace jacket either. That seems more like something my MIL would have worn intead of me. I've not started looking yet, so I really have no idea what I'll be wearing.

 

[Floridagal23]

So many great suggestions and experiences and pictures! Thanks!

This is a pretty informal wedding - it's being held at a local library (they both are huge book lovers), but it's at night too... so that confuses me.

Anyways... colors are light blue and gray. Nobody has picked out dresses yet so I'm not quite sure if the bridal party is even going to be wearing full length or not...

I asked my son - he said wear whatever, LOL. Yeah right. I have never met the fiance. They are 1500 miles away. I'll probably have to contact her on Facebook, but I think based on what I know about her, she is not going to care what I wear. But I still want to be "safe" and not start off our relationship on the wrong foot.

I found this dress yesterday which I LOVE, but it's ivory so I'm hesitant that it's too close to white ? I did find another dress in a steel gray which would blend really nice with the wedding colors, but I love the ivory dress more and I would definitely wear it again for other occasions.

Is ivory inappropriate? I know it's not the "traditional" look of a mother of the groom, lol, but I just can't see myself in a beaded jacket type of dress.

It is a nice dress - I wore a very similar dress to my own pre-wedding event in turquoise (Is it Lilly Pulitzer?). You could probably get away with it for a post-wedding brunch, but please do not wear it to the wedding. Even if the bride does not mind (or says she doesn't), it is really the bride's day to wear white.

 

[Liberty Belle]

Hey OP, I think this dress would look gorgeous on you:

http://www1.macys.com/shop/product/...ryID=5449#fn=sp=1&spc=1623&ruleId=38&slotId=3

This one is pretty, too, though I think it would be better without the sequins.

http://www1.macys.com/shop/product/...nkType=#fn=sp=9&spc=1627&ruleId=38&slotId=354

 

[christineann]

My son got married a little less than 2 years ago, and out of courtesy and respect for his fiancee and her mother (who I like very much), I waited until the MOB had chosen her dress before I chose mine.

I agree with bdcp and tarheel. It's not about "asking permission." It's just being courteous and cooperative. It would also look kind of strange if either of the mothers chose dresses the same color as the bridal party or something that looks "bridal." Let the bride (and her mom) have the day

 

[Disney Doll]

The ivory dress is lovely but too bridish. (not sure if that is a word).

That said, when I got married, there was no discussion of the MOB or MOG dresses....and I did plan down to the last detail. It never even occurred to me that I should have any say in their dresses. My bridal party wore mauve. My mother wore ivory and gold. Groom's mom wore turquoise. Everyone looked great!

I have two sons and when they do get married, I have no intention of asking for permission or coordinating with the MOB.

I am a middle aged woman and finding ANY dress that looks good is a challenge enough! I won't wear white or any color that would be a problem with the bride...but I sure will NOT be too concerned with the color of the bridal pary or the MOB and will not ask for permission from the bride to wear any color I choose.

Well that will get you a nice warm welcome into the family.

When I was the bride, I thought it was quite thoughful of my DMIL to ask me if I had any requests with regard to her attire.

I knew her well enough to know she wouldn't show up in white lace.

I told her the wedding color was teal with dashes of pinky/coral. She graciously said "Well, I'll try to find something that will blend nicely with that so the pictures will look nice". She asked what color my mother was wearing and I told her pale peach. She graciously said "OK, so I'll stay away from pale peach". I also told her that if she found a beautiful black dress and wanted to wear it that I wouldn't think she was in mourning or trying to send a "message". I think that "no black at weddings" thing is outdated. Black these days is just considered to be a dressy color.

She ended up purchasing a lovely cocktail suit in a floral with peach , coral and teal. And I don't have any negative memories of "dressing the mothers".

 

[lorimay]

The ivory dress is lovely but too bridish. (not sure if that is a word).

That said, when I got married, there was no discussion of the MOB or MOG dresses....and I did plan down to the last detail. It never even occurred to me that I should have any say in their dresses. My bridal party wore mauve. My mother wore ivory and gold. Groom's mom wore turquoise. Everyone looked great!

I have two sons and when they do get married, I have no intention of asking for permission or coordinating with the MOB.

I am a middle aged woman and finding ANY dress that looks good is a challenge enough! I won't wear white or any color that would be a problem with the bride...but I sure will NOT be too concerned with the color of the bridal pary or the MOB and will not ask for permission from the bride to wear any color I choose.

I love my son's GF they have been together since high school, they are now 20.
I have a wonderful relationship with her.
I will do whatever she wants me to do so that I can be a part of her wedding planning. I want to be there when she chooses her dress and every other detail.
Heck, I will wear a burlap bag if thats what she says.
I have one son and want him to be happy and always in my life.
I would never do anything to have to make him choose.

 

[krcit]

Great dress but not for a wedding. My cousin's wife wore a white off the shoulder dress to my wedding and it still annoys me 19 years later....lol!!!

 

[threeboysmom]

Hey OP, I think this dress would look gorgeous on you:

http://www1.macys.com/shop/product/...ryID=5449#fn=sp=1&spc=1623&ruleId=38&slotId=3

Wow, Liberty Belle!! Of ALL the dresses, designers, and stores out there, you picked my #2 dress - the steel gray one! I tried that dress on at Macy's after finding the ivory one. It did look good on me, but I didn't *love* it like I did the other. It seemed a little flimsy to me and not as great of a quality as the other dress, and with the sequins, I really don't see myself wearing that dress again. Although at this point, I haven't found anything else, so that gray dress may end up being "the one" unfortunately.

I would LOVE to dye the ivory one to a navy blue as Disney Doll suggested.... gosh it makes me nervous though. The dress is such a nice quality, I certainly don't want to ruin it. Is dying a pretty safe, no fail, reasonable thing to do? lol

 

[BeckyEsq]

So many great suggestions and experiences and pictures! Thanks!

This is a pretty informal wedding - it's being held at a local library (they both are huge book lovers), but it's at night too... so that confuses me.

Anyways... colors are light blue and gray. Nobody has picked out dresses yet so I'm not quite sure if the bridal party is even going to be wearing full length or not...

I asked my son - he said wear whatever, LOL. Yeah right. I have never met the fiance. They are 1500 miles away. I'll probably have to contact her on Facebook, but I think based on what I know about her, she is not going to care what I wear. But I still want to be "safe" and not start off our relationship on the wrong foot.

I found this dress yesterday which I LOVE, but it's ivory so I'm hesitant that it's too close to white ? I did find another dress in a steel gray which would blend really nice with the wedding colors, but I love the ivory dress more and I would definitely wear it again for other occasions.

Is ivory inappropriate? I know it's not the "traditional" look of a mother of the groom, lol, but I just can't see myself in a beaded jacket type of dress.

I agree with the others that you should not wear this to the wedding, but it looks great on you so consider buying it to wear to one of the other wedding events -- might there be a rehearsal dinner, or a wedding brunch, or a dressy shower? I say when you find a dress you love that flatters you, buy it because you can wear it somewhere eventually!