At what age did you let your son go to the mens room alone?

[Rebekkap]

I'm sorry, but who are you to judge another's parenting and advise them that they have issue that need professional help?
It would be nice to see parents behaving like grown ups on this thread. The longer it goes on the more cheap shots I am seeing. We may not all agree with eachothers parenting beliefs but that doesn't make anyone right or wrong and certainly doesn't warrant someone saying what you said to this person.
Its not the predators that we need to worry about. Its all the judgemental parents out there. Yikes!
I think we mostly can all agree that this thread has probably gone on longer than needed and im sure the OP has gotten plenty of advice.

I'm someone who's concerned that there are girls in the girls' bathroom who shouldn't be confronted by a ten year old boy. And like I said, I wasn't trying to be rude or harsh, but if a parent won't let a developmentally normal ten year old go to the toilet by themself and is taking them into the ladies, they have issues they need more help with than they can get on the internet. It wasn't a "cheap shot", it was genuine advice. If you are scared for your ten year old to spend two minutes alone in a crowded place where there are plenty of adults to help if they yell, that's absolutely outside the parameters of normal parenting and a normal mindset. That's paranoia, and dysfunction. It's not something to be ashamed of, or to make cheap shots about, it's something that needs professional help. It's like if I saw a bone sticking out of your leg, I'd say "hey, looks like your leg's broken, maybe you'd like me to call an ambulance?"

 

[Dot2Vegas]

I think most people would think that it is wrong to bring an almost teenage boy into the women's public restroom unless that child had a disability. Very few people are going to think this is acceptable behavior.

There are plenty of parenting styles out there, which is great, but there are certain things that are just plain wrong. And this is one of them, especially since it involves other people (all other women and girls in the bathroom.)

I mean, it's not like the "how old is too old to be in a stroller" type of debate. Because that one really doesn't effect anyone else. But this one does.

But do you or anyone for that matter think that this comes up enough to warrant this big of a discussion? And if this were as prevalent of an issue as its being made here don't you think that Disneyland would address it? Someone in the thread mentioned a water park having age restrictions. I dont know, thats the last of my two cents. People feel how they feel and no one will change (and shouldn't have to). Seems like beating a dead horse at this point.

 

[Rebekkap]

Accidental duplicate post sorry

 

[Rebekkap]

People feel how they feel and no one will change (and shouldn't have to).

Actually, if people's behaviour is adversely affecting others then they should have to change!

 

[Malcon10t]

3. DS10 is 5'2" and nearly 110lb. This creates two problems: He thinks he is "big enough" to thwart an attacker in the men's room and he looks 12-13 so he worries that if he's in the ladies' room someone will think he's not just a little kid.

No, at this age and size, he does not belong in the ladies room. There are several companion bathrooms through out Disneyland. If you are insistent he be within eyesight of you, I suggest you use one of them. One is located near the Tour Center on Main ST, another located at the Aladdins Oasis, another by the Fantasyland Theater, one near Plaza Inn (according to DIsneyland, I haven't seen this one), then in DCA, one on Buena VIsta near the Commerce, one by Little Mermaid, several by Flos, one by Bugsland, and on the Pacific Wharf. I hope this helps.

At what age are you going to allow him to use the men's room? And if you aren't taking him into the stall with you, how are you protecting him from the female predators? Yes, they are very active also.

Yes, my boys went on their own by age 7. My 10yo nephew is accompanying his male siblings to the men's room now. I would NOT take him to the women's room.

 

[Dot2Vegas]

Actually, if people's behaviour is adversely affecting others then they should have to change!

Then perhaps I should have worded it differently. People aren't going to change and shouldn't have to change their way of doing things based on opinions of others on a message board on the internet. At this point in the discussion I dont think that either side of the debate is going to read opposing views and be convinced to change their ways or open to change how they do things. I'm sure that most parents bringing 10 year old boys into the restroom would be more than happy to find a family restroom or accommodate the young ladies in there if asked to do so. I also think that most people would follow an age rule if it were set by Disney. Unfortunately there isn't such a thing and people on one side or the other are going to be uncomfortable in some way. Its a part of life. And if anyone feels that strongly they should voice their concerns to guest services, maybe enough people expressing concern would get them to address this situation in a way that pleases the majority.

 

[Malcon10t]

I'm someone who's concerned that there are girls in the girls' bathroom who shouldn't be confronted by a ten year old boy. And like I said, I wasn't trying to be rude or harsh, but if a parent won't let a developmentally normal ten year old go to the toilet by themself and is taking them into the ladies, they have issues they need more help with than they can get on the internet. It wasn't a "cheap shot", it was genuine advice. If you are scared for your ten year old to spend two minutes alone in a crowded place where there are plenty of adults to help if they yell, that's absolutely outside the parameters of normal parenting and a normal mindset. That's paranoia, and dysfunction. It's not something to be ashamed of, or to make cheap shots about, it's something that needs professional help. It's like if I saw a bone sticking out of your leg, I'd say "hey, looks like your leg's broken, maybe you'd like me to call an ambulance?"

I have to agree. I had an issue when I had my youngest son. I grew up in an era and near 1. Steven Stayner and 2. A baby kidnapped from a local store, one that I frequented. The first time I shopped in the store after my son's birth, I literally froze. How was I going to go out into the parking lot, where the baby had been kidnapped with my child. I knew I had a problem, and I sought help. Things that happen in our lives can cause us to have issues in life. For the poster, she read the news about the boy in the bathroom at Vegas (I think that was where it was). It has scarred her, and in doing so, is scarring her son. She won't see it that way without help. But we will all only move forward at our own pace. I just hope she isn't still making him accompany her when he is 13/15/17....

 

[corinne76]

My daughter is 6.5 (and I'm the mom) but if she were with hubby, he'd take her in with him. Not because we're afraid of anything. Seriously, pedophiles at DL? Can you imagine? they wouldn't make it out of the mens restroom alive with all the daddies and grandpas in there. No, it's cause our daughter would get overrun in the larger restrooms (smaller ones she's be fine). But she gets overwhelmed easily and frightened. But that's her. At that age, I'd say some kids are fine to go in alone as long as they know which door to come out if there are 2 and you stand right there by the door

 

[Love Tink]

Then perhaps I should have worded it differently. People aren't going to change and shouldn't have to change their way of doing things based on opinions of others on a message board on the internet. At this point in the discussion I dont think that either side of the debate is going to read opposing views and be convinced to change their ways or open to change how they do things. I'm sure that most parents bringing 10 year old boys into the restroom would be more than happy to find a family restroom or accommodate the young ladies in there if asked to do so. I also think that most people would follow an age rule if it were set by Disney. Unfortunately there isn't such a thing and people on one side or the other are going to be uncomfortable in some way. Its a part of life. And if anyone feels that strongly they should voice their concerns to guest services, maybe enough people expressing concern would get them to address this situation in a way that pleases the majority.

Or we could choose to discuss it on, you know, a place that exists specifically for discussion and where someone asked the question, "When did others start letting their sons go into the mens bathrooms alone?"

The fact that you're in the 5% on this issue doesn't mean that the 95% shouldn't discuss it.

 

[Dot2Vegas]

Or we could choose to discuss it on, you know, a place that exists specifically for discussion and where someone asked the question, "When did others start letting their sons go into the mens bathrooms alone?"

The fact that you're in the 5% on this issue doesn't mean that the 95% shouldn't discuss it.

Thanks for pointing that out. As I stated before, beating a dead horse. I dont think snarky remarks help OP at this point.

 

[theggs4ever]

I've had two friends work security at Disneyland...one was high up in the department. Both of them, on separate occasions, have said that pedophiles visit the park all the time (especially hanging out in Fantasyland) and they know who the "regulars" are and watch them. They also said that said pedophiles take pics of kids on the rides and such (not pornographic in nature) and that there is nothing they can do about it. They both said I don't want to know what else they know...

 

[Dot2Vegas]

I've had two friends work security at Disneyland...one was high up in the department. Both of them, on separate occasions, have said that pedophiles visit the park all the time (especially hanging out in Fantasyland) and they know who the "regulars" are and watch them. They also said that said pedophiles take pics of kids on the rides and such (not pornographic in nature) and that there is nothing they can do about it. They both said I don't want to know what else they know...

Sadly I'm not surprised to hear this. They may not act out at Disneyland. But for disgusting creeps that like to watch little kids, Disneyland would be a good place to do so. They can hide in plain sight, really. Probably easier than a park or library. Disneyland is full of people that are busy doing other things and probably not very aware of what everyone else is doing.

 

[theggs4ever]

Sadly I'm not surprised to hear this. They may not act out at Disneyland. But for disgusting creeps that like to watch little kids, Disneyland would be a good place to do so. They can hide in plain sight, really. Probably easier than a park or library. Disneyland is full of people that are busy doing other things and probably not very aware of what everyone else is doing.

Exactly. :/

 

[Gracie09]

I saw this thread yesterday but didn't get a chance to read it today.

Exactly when can't you take your son into the stall with you?

That's what I'm trying to figure out. You sit he stands. He stands, you stand. You move around each other to change positions.
Or are you saying your sense of privacy doesn't allow you to have him in the stall with you? But to take arguments from up thread, it's a public bathroom there isn't any real privacy.
If you are uncomfortable with him in the stall with you, people are uncomfortable with him outside your stall.
As I said I've had three four year olds in the stall with me. Tight but doable

 

[Gracie09]

Sadly I'm not surprised to hear this. They may not act out at Disneyland. But for disgusting creeps that like to watch little kids, Disneyland would be a good place to do so. They can hide in plain sight, really. Probably easier than a park or library. Disneyland is full of people that are busy doing other things and probably not very aware of what everyone else is doing.

How exactly is it easier? You have to pay $$$ to get in are under constant survealiance, video and otherwise. I go to my local park at ten in the morning and it packed with preschool and younger kids. After school the town library has the elementary and middle school set. And I don't have to pay anything and there are no video cameras. With a cell phone I can take hundreds of pictures and you would have no clue

 

[nannyz]

The last time I saw a thread get to this point was when I started one about people buying Disney name tags and wearing them in the park. My point was that they could lure a child away by making them think they were a Disney employee.

Odd that we get such differing opinions when it comes to the safety of children.

All of us parents just need to do what we feel is best for our kids.

 

[mom2rtk]

All of us parents just need to do what we feel is best for our kids.

...... until it starts infringing on others. It's a balance.

If the PP thinks 10 is ok, what about 11? How about 12? 13?

I still can't get over the PP completely discounting my 13 Y.O. daughter's desire for a bit of privacy and modesty in a ladies' room.

 

[Dot2Vegas]

How exactly is it easier? You have to pay $$$ to get in are under constant survealiance, video and otherwise. I go to my local park at ten in the morning and it packed with preschool and younger kids. After school the town library has the elementary and middle school set. And I don't have to pay anything and there are no video cameras. With a cell phone I can take hundreds of pictures and you would have no clue

Easier in the sense that most people's guards are lower at Disneyland. I know that when I am with the kids at the park or library I am watching their surroundings, looking for anyone that might stand out, even just noting who is alone at the park with no kids, because they are off playing on their own. At Disneyland we are all having fun together. While I would still notice an obvious creep snapping photos or luring someone away, I'm not going to notice a seemingly normal looking person taking photos. That could be a dad waiting for someone. You aren't going to stand around long enough to find out because you are busy having fun and because you are trying to accomplish a whole lot in the day.
And creeps who enjoy this type of thing aren't going to have a problem paying to get it. If they have the funds they will spend them. They may not attack a child due to the cameras and crowds but they can certainly watch. Disneyland can't kick you out for looking at people.

 

[mom2rtk]

Easier in the sense that most people's guards are lower at Disneyland. I know that when I am with the kids at the park or library I am watching their surroundings, looking for anyone that might stand out, even just noting who is alone at the park with no kids, because they are off playing on their own. At Disneyland we are all having fun together. While I would still notice an obvious creep snapping photos or luring someone away, I'm not going to notice a seemingly normal looking person taking photos. That could be a dad waiting for someone. You aren't going to stand around long enough to find out because you are busy having fun and because you are trying to accomplish a whole lot in the day.
And creeps who enjoy this type of thing aren't going to have a problem paying to get it. If they have the funds they will spend them. They may not attack a child due to the cameras and crowds but they can certainly watch. Disneyland can't kick you out for looking at people.

I'm not sure how this relates to anything going on in the bathrooms. Do you think someone could stand around a bathroom in DL taking photos and nobody would say anything?

 

[Dot2Vegas]

I'm not sure how this relates to anything going on in the bathrooms. Do you think someone could stand around a bathroom in DL taking photos and nobody would say anything?

I was referring to people in the park in general. I would hope that if people saw someone taking photos in a bathroom that someone would say something. In a sense, I guess it does relate to bathrooms. Those creeps taking pics have to use the restroom at some point and could potentially be in that bathroom with an unsupervised child.