Are you a worrier?

[anut4disney]

If they gave out gold medals for worrying, I would be on the top podium. I worry about everything.

 

[motherhen17404]

<-------- See my log on name! A friend of mine named me that. He says that no one needs to worry for themselves, I do enough for everyone! I take everyone under my wing and worry about them. I worry about family, friends, even people I just met. I am trying to get better about it. DH is the "roll of the back" kind of person. Nothing shakes him. I am trying to be a little more like him.

 

[imsorry]

Yes!!! I worry about EVERYTHING. When the painters were coming on Saturday, I woke up super early, worried I wouldn't be up and dressed in time. I worried if I should talk to them, offer them something to eat or drink, I worried if I picked the right colors. After the job was done (it looked great) I was up that night worrying if I should have picked eggshell finish instead of flat. Now DH has me worried that the painter didn't give us a receipt!

When we are going to Disney, I worry that DH will try to make me go on Rock N Roller Coaster or Tower of Terror! Now I am worried about Expedition Everest on the next trip. I worry that I won't feel good when I get there. I worry that it will be too hot and humid. Or God forbid, RAIN!

I could go on like this all day, but my hands are starting to shake just thinking about all this!!!

 

[imsorry]

Holy crap - now I'm worried I killed this thread

 

[Christine]

Nope, imsorry, I won't let you kill the thread!! I'll probably do it.

I've been reading this thread. You people need some help. Seriously though, I have anxiety similar to what some of you are posting. I've started seeing a therapist for it (cognitive behaviorial therapy). Do you all think the way you think is "normal" or have you considered doing something about it? Just curious.

 

[vivilasvegas]

I'm a big worrier and I hate it. It's so bad, that I'm afraid if I don't worry about something and relax, then something bad will definitely happen.

 

[Brier Rose]

Yes!!! I worry about EVERYTHING. When the painters were coming on Saturday, I woke up super early, worried I wouldn't be up and dressed in time. I worried if I should talk to them, offer them something to eat or drink, I worried if I picked the right colors. After the job was done (it looked great) I was up that night worrying if I should have picked eggshell finish instead of flat. Now DH has me worried that the painter didn't give us a receipt!

When we are going to Disney, I worry that DH will try to make me go on Rock N Roller Coaster or Tower of Terror! Now I am worried about Expedition Everest on the next trip. I worry that I won't feel good when I get there. I worry that it will be too hot and humid. Or God forbid, RAIN!

I could go on like this all day, but my hands are starting to shake just thinking about all this!!!

OMG..are you my twin???

I can't believe how much your post hit home with me! I was just reading it going that's me!!!

so YES I am a worrier to the extreme!

I actually tried wellbutrin for it last year, and at first all went well. That is until I started thinking about jumping off of our balcony all the time!
Seriously it made me completly unstable! Much worse than the worrying problem!!

These days I manage it by obsessivly planning Disney trips! Really..I get my mind sooo focused on that, that I don't have room to worry about the bad stuff. At least that's a fun thing to worry about.

 

[Dodie]

I am a worrier. My dad is a worrier - I think I get it from him.

I internalize everything. I think too much. I always assume the worst. If things are going well, I start to worry about when things will go wrong.

 

[imsorry]

OMG..are you my twin???

I can't believe how much your post hit home with me! I was just reading it going that's me!!!

so YES I am a worrier to the extreme!

These days I manage it by obsessivly planning Disney trips! Really..I get my mind sooo focused on that, that I don't have room to worry about the bad stuff. At least that's a fun thing to worry about.

Yeah, but what about the RIDES???? The Weather??? the Plane????? The Lines???? Suppose I get skin cancer from laying by the pool????

 

[antmaril]

Yes, I worry about everything. It's horrible.

When we're on vacation and have a rental car, I don't sleep at all the last night of the trip because I'm worrying about returning the car the next day. Where do we go? Will we be able to find it? What if we get lost? Blah, blah, blah.

I cannot turn off my brain.

 

[lewilder]

(My first post!)

I WAS a chronic worry-er and wound up clinically depressed. No fun!

Cognitive behavioral therapy worked for me. It is a method of identifying distorted thoughts and learning how to think in an untwisted way. It is not simply "positive thinking" or "looking on the bright side," but instead learning to recognize the specific, distorted patterns of thinking that makes us nuts, and substitute thoughts that are more rational and normal.

For anyone who recognizes that their worrying is unhealthy and wants to change, consider therapy. There's also an excellent book I used called "The Feeling Good Handbook" by David D. Burns. I hate the title and I hate the cheesy photo of the author on the front cover, but the contents made a huge difference in my life. Good luck, all.

 

[Brier Rose]

Yeah, but what about the RIDES???? The Weather??? the Plane????? The Lines???? Suppose I get skin cancer from laying by the pool????

I know...I know!

I'm usually OK with the rides...UNLESS..I've made the mistake of reading something bad about them right before I go.

Like last year when the little boy died after riding Mission Space. DS had NEVER wanted to ride it before, so OF COURSE, he picks right after that happend to want to ride it!

I was actually in tears the whole time. (he didn't know that..I was trying extra hard not to discourage him) I really was so worried.
I HATE that I get like that. I KNOW it's not logical, but it's like I can't help it!

We drive down, so I don't worry about plane crashes..just car accidents.
I just stay awake the whole time to make sure DH is watching the road!

I don't worry about the lines anymore. Tour Guide Mike fixed that for me!

And while I don't worry TOO much about skin cancer...I do worry very much about sunburn. All I have to say about that is SPF 1000 anyone???

 

[DVC Daisy]

For anyone who recognizes that their worrying is unhealthy and wants to change, consider therapy. There's also an excellent book I used called "The Feeling Good Handbook" by David D. Burns.

What - are you saying it is not normal to worry about anything and everything? I don't know any other way!

BTW, I did order the book - can't hurt. Now I can worry about if it will help or not Or more importantly - If I killed the thread!

 

[Christine]

(My first post!)

I WAS a chronic worry-er and wound up clinically depressed. No fun!

Cognitive behavioral therapy worked for me. It is a method of identifying distorted thoughts and learning how to think in an untwisted way. It is not simply "positive thinking" or "looking on the bright side," but instead learning to recognize the specific, distorted patterns of thinking that makes us nuts, and substitute thoughts that are more rational and normal.

For anyone who recognizes that their worrying is unhealthy and wants to change, consider therapy. There's also an excellent book I used called "The Feeling Good Handbook" by David D. Burns. I hate the title and I hate the cheesy photo of the author on the front cover, but the contents made a huge difference in my life. Good luck, all.

Welcome!!!

I just started CBT (just finished my 3rd session). So far we haven't done much as the therapist is trying to get to the "meat" of my anxiety.

I have read the Burns book a long time ago. Unfortunately, I am way past a book helping me. I noticed my therapist is using one by a guy named Andrew (or is it Arthur) Beck and some of the passages I've read have REALLY hit home.

Anyway, if you don't mind discussing (we can take it to PMs if you do) were you skeptical of CBT at first? I just have this underlying feeling/belief that I've been this way for so long that nothing can "undo" me.

 

[S. C.]

yes...

 

[lewilder]

Welcome!!!

I just started CBT (just finished my 3rd session). So far we haven't done much as the therapist is trying to get to the "meat" of my anxiety.

I have read the Burns book a long time ago. Unfortunately, I am way past a book helping me. I noticed my therapist is using one by a guy named Andrew (or is it Arthur) Beck and some of the passages I've read have REALLY hit home.

Anyway, if you don't mind discussing (we can take it to PMs if you do) were you skeptical of CBT at first? I just have this underlying feeling/belief that I've been this way for so long that nothing can "undo" me.

I have two sisters-in-law who have been in therapy for years, trying to get at the underlying causes of their anxiety (and making very little progress). When I started therapy I tried diving into that issue, too. My therapist said, yes, it is sometimes helpful to know the WHY -- genetic predisposition, poor role models, trauma or abuse, whatever -- but it is not always relevant. You can have everything in your life going perfectly well, and still suffer from horrible anxiety. You can have a horrible life and still be upbeat. It's not what happens to us that causes us to be anxious or depressed; it's our reaction to what happens to us. And that reaction is controllable.

I am a nuts-and-bolts, science-y skeptical type and I appreciate cognitive behavioral therapy in part because they have good scientific data that shows it actually works. You CAN change the way you think. Personally I found the David Burns book more helpful even than therapy itself, but as in everything, your mileage may vary. (I'm not familiar with the other book but I'm sure there are good ones out there.)

My anxiety turned into full-blown depression, something I wouldn't wish on anyone. I don't want to suggest that everyone who worries needs psychological help, but I would guess there are others out there for whom the worrying is interfering with the day-to-day joy of living. There is definitely help out there.

Apologies for making this into a commercial about cognitive behavioral therapy!

(Christine, I'll PM you.)

 

[THE HAT]

i too am a worrier. i used to worry about money to pay the bills when dh and i were first married and hit some tough times. ( you know the whole rob peter to pay paul thing) now we are fortunate enough to not have to worry about money.
but there are still plenty of other things to worry about.
health issues
aging parents/grandparents
ds and karate tournaments (how will he do/ will he be ok/where we know where to go at the new places/ will ds know where to go in each of the rings etc etc, after we have been to that place once i am fine the next time it is just the unknowing that gets to me)
is dh ok when he is driving home late at night
when dh cell rings but he doesn't answer
and the list goes on and on

now none of this makes me not enjoy life or miss out on important things
i do have a touch of panic attacks mostly in busy places (stores at christmas for example) and in places i don't know anyone (buisness trips with dh) but i am on a low does of ativan to take as needed and this stuff has been a godsend for me. i go weeks without taking it but just knowing it is there if i do need it helps i think.

the other thing that helps me is that dh is the last person in the world to worry about anything. he is so laid back at all times, so he is my serenity. he balances me.

 

[devotedchristian]

Another worrier here. I worry to the point of Panic/Anxiety Attacks. DH knows I am this way and he has had to *work with me* through the years. My worry was *controllable* until I had DS (Age 2.5).

After he was born it INTENSIFIED to the point of Panic/Anxiety attacks. I worry about something happening to him and I worry about something happening to DH and I am left to parent DS alone.

I took out a huge life insurance policy on DH because I worried that I wouldn't be able to pay the bills and I'd have to put DS in daycare. The money was a reassurance to me that I could stay home with DS and propery grieve.

DS is at home with DH (WAHD) during the day. I call every morning at 9:30 withOUT fail and my heart beats like crazy when he doensn't answer. 99% of the time he answers...but then there's that 1% where he doesn't answer and it drives me NUTS!

One morning, I called and called and called and called and he didn't pick up. I called my next door neighbor to go and check on them but he didn't pick up. I was at work, got in the car and drove home (I get to work at 8am...and it was about 10:30...so I am freaking out) and he called me on my cell to say "hey, did you call me?"

I had tears streaming down my face because all I could picture was DH laying on the floor and DS (Age 2.5) screaming trying to wake him up and being scared and looking for Mommy.

For me, New Motherhood intensified it.

 

[dturner]

I needlessly worry about so much that when there is ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to worry about, I'll worry that I'm forgetting to worry about something.