Anyone have a 16yr old move away from home?

[RunDanceSkate]

We are considering allowing DS16 move away from home for his sport. He would be moving to a different country and we could probably have him come home for a long weekend or holiday and once every other month. Almost feels like we are negotiating custody. We get him for a long weekend in October, Christmas, March break, Easter, 2/3 weeks in June and 2 weeks in August.

I am the only one who is having real issues with it. DS is excited and DH travels alot so he could visit DS every month. I keep telling myself it is only 1yr earlier then if he had skipped a grade and was leaving for college, but it doesn't help. DD13 is planning the best use of DS's closet space.

Anyone want to share their experiences?

 

[Feralpeg]

I used to work as a teacher for a private school here in the Orlando area. The school had several students who lived in Florida so they could train to be professional golfers. Most of the kids were from Canada. They lived with their trainer. The good weather year round in Florida allowed them to practice much more than they could have living at home. The kids all seemed to do fine.

 

[locolala]

I didn't move to another country, but I moved a couple thousand miles away to train every winter. The winters here aren't great for horseback riding, and all the major shows happen in the south anyhow so.. I moved. I had a tutor and we lived in an apartment with a couple other kids doing the same thing. I missed my parents a fair amount, but it was well worth it because of the progress I was able to make in my riding.

 

[The Mystery Machine]

So he is an elite athlete? I suppose if that was going to be his career or is his career, I would have to let my child pursue it.

While 16 is young, your son sounds like he is not on a normal education/career path anyway.

When opportunity knocks, I guess you have to open the door.

Older dd (soon to be 19) is going to China for a month over summer and my 7th grader is going to be going to a scholar program for 3 weeks and stay in a dorm.

Both of them worked hard to get there, so I have to let them go.

HUGS to you....your situation sounds very hard to accept but exciting at the same time.

 

[Sleepy]

I think if he is on the right track for a promising career in this activity,then you should have no problem letting him go if he is mature and you all have the finances to fly to be with him in cases of emergencies.

We were fortunate enough to be able to move the entire family overseas for our son's needs, but I know of many children who live in dorms far away from home and they do fine.

 

[golfgal]

I guess it would depend on the end result and how realistic he would achieve that. If he is a good athlete and you are hoping he gets an athletic scholarship but it costs you 10K/year to do that, then the idea is silly unless he already has promises for those scholarships in writing. Are the chances of becoming a pro realistic? Is he eventually going to make money off this move?

 

[damo]

I know of someone in my area (Toronto) who's young son attends a sporting school in Florida -- his sport is baseball. Although she misses him terribly, she says he is so happy and that things are wonderful for him.

 

[mum4jenn]

What is his sport and where would he be going????

 

[JimmyPicker]

That's tough as a parent. You spend all this time trying to raise them right and give them wings so that when their time comes, they can fly away to live the life that makes them happy.

Letting go is part of being a mom. A hard part. But only you and your family know what's right. Good luck to you and your son, either way!