We love the Hoop Dee Doo show. The food is wonderful and makes for a hearty meal. We thought the show was lots of fun and we laughed through the whole thing. My husband got to be in the show, although he was not the angel! We consider it a terrific value when you factor in all the delicious food you want, all the alcohol you care to drink, and a great show! I would recommend it wholeheartedly for anyone of any age who loves Disney and likes "down home" cooking, although I would recommend you book about a year ahead of time if you have that much time before your trip. It will get you a seat up close to the stage, which in my opinion is the best place to take in the show.
As for the Backyard B-B-Q, my husband and I went to this in May and were very underwhelmed. In fact, we left in the middle of the show. The food was just OK, it was outside so you had to contend with hot weather and insects and there were a million kids trying to see the characters without any organization at all. Now don't get me wrong, I love kids and I think they should see the characters at Disney. But when you have them swarmed around the characters en masse on the dance floor, it is hard to enjoy the dancing (I gave up after one dance, I was too afraid of stepping on a little person). Glad we did it, just don't care to do it again.
So, my vote is - GO TRY HOOP DEE DOO!!! You'll be glad you did!