Anyone else NOT have their kids in lots of activities?

[Nancy]

Up until this year my kids took major dance lessons. The 2 oldest were on a travel comp. team which meant 8 hours of lessons per week and then tons of extra rehearsals. Youngest danced 7 hours a week. This year the 2 oldest went to just regular classes...2 a piece and I limited youngest to 3 classes. My 14 year old now does some sports after school. Oldest doesn't do anything else...high school is tough enough. Youngest does some odd after school thngs and has girlscouts. When they danced there was no time for anything extra...my whole life was scheduled around them, including vacations. I missed all 3 of my nephews high school graduations, and I've missed the 2 oldest graduations from college. NO MORE! We are a family and we will spend time as a family. The summers are total down time...they will have no planned activities, hopefully we'll be able to do some day trips together. Next year I think the 2 oldest have decided no more dancing and they will just stick to school offered activities. No clue what #3 wants to do. Besides which I work all kinds of weird hours and hated depending on others to take my kids places...especially my Mom....she always had a comment about how they were doing too much.

 

[danacara]

You know it's funny, I feel like all of the lessons I was forced to take wound up being really good for me. I look back, and what can I do? I can play the piano, the oboe, I can ski, ice skate, dance, bowl, play tennis and golf. These were all lessons, and they are serving me well now (golf especially - my bosses were mucho impressed, now I can go out with clients to meetings that are way above my level). And I certainly wasn't going to learn that stuff sitting in my yard.

I think dance for young girls is really key. You can see the effect on them in terms of grace and posture. I don't care if my daughters don't want to take it ... it's non-optional ... but I hope I'll present it as a fun thing and they'll like it.

 

[KimR]

I wish - my DDs are doing gymnastics and piano this summer. It would be nice to have a summer off with no obligations, but with gymnastics that is not an option. I am not looking forward to it because my oldest DD will go 4 days a week from 10 until 2 and then my middle DD will go twice a week from 5:00 till 6:30. Looks like I'm going to be spending my summer driving to and from the gym. It's what they want to do, though, and I feel strongly about letting them follow their passions. I always wanted to take dance and piano when I was a child, but never had the opportunity.

 

[Trish Bessette]

No thank you, I will pass on running around crazy driving this one here and that one there.

My oldest DD loves soccer and that will end mid June. Other than that my youngest DD just loves being a kid, playing outside!

We live on the lake so our summers are relaxing down by the water. To me, it doesn't get much better, unless we were at Disney of course.

This will be us this summer:

 

[bumcat]

I think a lot of parents feel that their children have to participate in several activities in order for them to feel that they are doing a "good" job as parents. I have heard several friends say that their children are exposed to many activities that they weren't able to do as children, thus the children will become "well-rounded" individuals. For some moms, it's a badge of honor to be constantly on the go, driving each kid all over the place to the point of running themselves ragged


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You took the words right out of my mouth especially the badge of honor part. God it use to make me sick when my kids would play softball and I had to listen to the competition between a few of the moms. They always try to see who can out do who. And don't get me started on the parents that force their kids to do stuff.....

 

[Pembo]

It's nice to know we are not alone. I'll make sure to have dh read this thread. We were having this conversation again this morning. Ds#1 is very non-sports. Just isn't his thing. DS#2 is a little more coordinated but we tried a soccer class this winter and he could care less. He had fun at the time but when we asked if he wanted to do it again, he said no.

We are going to stick to playing on the swingset, playing in the sandbox, bike rides with Dad, and other stuff around home. Oldest is going to church camp for a week and they both will go to VBS.


And to respond to danacara - My dh tried EVERYTHING as a child. He is ADHD but they didn't know at the time and we think his mother just enrolled him to get him out of her hair. But he says he is the jack of all trades, master of none. His parents never made him stick to anything. They just let him bounce from one thing to another. Everything he asked to try they said ok. He doesn't think that was a good thing. Just a different opinion.

 

[ValerieK]

My Ds does 1 sports activity, (Tae Kwon Do) and has violin lessons afterschool once a week. He will not be going to camp or anything this summer, he usually doesn't. He does not like to have to many activites. He needs time to play and be by himself. he gets upset when he can't play with his friends because they have activities everyday after school. Our DD goes to preschool and takes gymnastics. I don't want to spend my days in a car taking them everywhere. I would rather spend time at home with them playing and talking.

 

[Disneycrazymom]

Interesting thread! We have never pushed our kids to do anything, and yet I find they LOVE to be involved! We have limited DS to 2 activites but he would do much more if allowed. Right now his goal is to make a hockey team next year and he is working very hard to achieve his goal. Because I want to support his effort I have become one of the mom's you are talking about running him to practice and games. He also plays the trumpet. DD enjoys a dance class 1 time a week and is doing learn to skate at the same rink as DS plays hockey.

I guess what I am saying is it is not always the parent. I am fine with whatever they want to try as long as their grades are good and they work hard at it. They can decide when it is time to stop as long as they meet the 2 rules. I personally think this is one of the hardest parts of parenting, decideing how much is too much or too little!

 

[lindajo]

DS4 and DS6 go to school during the school year. We belong to a community pool, so we swim in the summer. I thought we were the only ones who didn't overextend themselves on the activities. I am waiting for DS6 to start 1st grade, and hopefully he will learn one sport that he likes. Right now, I am enjoying not having to chauffeur them all over town. My DSIL has 4 kids, (ages 7-13) and they EACH have at LEAST two organized sports, some have 3. I can't believe that she can do anything other than drive those kids all over town. I admire her, and at the same time think she is totally crazy. And I am sure she would agree....

 

[ZachnElli]

I limit my kids to 2 activities at a time too. And when we do swimming, they both do it at the same time. Right now only dd is doing anything extra and that's dance class just once a week. We will be moving, so everything is on hold. But once we move we will do Tae Kwon Do and guitar for ds and Dance or gymnastics for dd and piano. Dd is going back and forth on the dance or gymnastics decision. I might let her take both if we get moved before the school year since kindergarten is only half days there and if I could get her into lessons during the day instead of at night. Ok thinking out loud, sorry! LOL!

 

[Gupsmom]

My kids can have 2 activities each. Unfortunately with 3 kids, that can still mean 6 activities. They also all go to a very fun youth church program...all 3 go at the same time and day so it's actually 2 free hours for me and DH (we have a nice dinner together).

I have to say that we don't feel like we're running ragged. My kids have LOTS of time to just hang out at home. I also like to have my children involved in one physical activity. Our winters are too long for the kids to just sit around. It's often too nasty outside for them to get enough exercise. I don't want them sitting around for 7 moths out of the year.

Everyone should do whatever they are comfortable with. Some kids thrive on activities. Some kids/parents would go nuts if they were over-scheduled. My kids definately need their down time. I've also found that evening activities are beter for my kids than activities that meet right after school. After school my kids want to veg out for a bit or play with a friend. I keep that time free for them. They're much happier with activities that meet after dinner, in the early evening. We also try to keep one weekend morning free to just wake up and lie around in PJ's.

Jess

 

[zakatak]

We like our family dinners now that my dh doesn't travel any more for his job. My ds does cub scouts (dh is the leader), my dd does daisy scouts (I am the leader) and my littlest dd (3) doesn't do anything yet. I might try some gymnastics with her so she doesn't keep jumping on my couch so much .

Summer will be spent at school rec (3 days, 9-12pm) for the older two so they can play with their friends from school. Otherwise, we will be swimming and travelling.

 

[6_Time_Momma]

I kind of play things by ear with my kiddos. Right now, Bradley is in track and Brittany and Destiny are in softball. For summer, Brittany and Destiny want to do a week long day 4H camp and Garrett will do his week-long horseback riding program, but for now that is it.

Come fall, three girls will be in Little Flowers once a week and they really want to do gymnastics again. I will have to see how that goes.

 

[TINKTWINS]

My older boys all did baseball/basketball. They are fairly close in age and I loved watching the games. 2 are in high school now, so its really up to them, they did football, bseball and basketball, my job is number one fan I do love to watch them. My 4yo twins tried gymnastics together but it was out of city and a pain. Shes in dancing but its almost over, he asked why he cant play baseball, still too young pal, so looks like i'll have another bball player, but summers are no activities! vacation means vacation! I dont mind the sports during the school year but I look for the breAK WELL except for an occasional summer night base ball game for my older boys

Cant resist, im the loud cheering fan mom here

 

[BethanyF]

The only thing I am doing with Sam this summer is bowling and a learn to play baseball camp. He needs to work on his social interactions, and both of these activites seem appropriate. The baseball thing is through the park district, but it is not little league. It is supposed to focus on the rules of the game and teamwork. The bowling is once a week for 11 weeks and we joined with 3 other kids from his class.
Other than that we will hang out at the pool, playground, mall, or he will just play in the yard with the neighborhood kids.

 

[CamColt]

I have to laugh at the irony of this. After I just posted a few days ago that my kids arent in much, and I thought I didnt have much running around to do, heres how my schedule for today ended up...

3:45-4:30-Colts soccer
5:30-Cams soccer game(make up from a rainout)
5:30 Cams first tball practice.

But the good news is it looks like rain, so Im hoping Cams 2 things will be rescheduled on different days.