An Inconvenient Truth: happyhaunt Style! (New... pg. 113!)

[daly7o9]

I just came out of lurkdom to say 'YAY...you're back'!

and

.
.
I'm first!

Well...maybe not.

 

[ZZUB]

"DUDE! Sorry about the lame killabrenda. I can't believe I called you an Emma. A babe. A babelini. Even. What was I thinkin', Brah? Totally agg. Bummer. I feel like an epic Barney. But...anywho... SINISTER SHOW!!!! Ripper, Duder! I gotta bail. Sorry I was so bogus."

It's like you're trying to speak to us but we can't understand you. Again I'm fartootst.

said that he must have just LET GO of it.

Maybe he's American. We toss out Canadian money all the time.

(it's the new moped. Just run with it and don't ask questions.)

 

[tink38]

Yay, Mel!

Personally, I think you're making all of this stuff up. I mean, really. How long has it actually been?

 

[Kay7979]

Thanks for resurrecting this trip report. Your reports are always fun to read.

 

[nicolemarie]

Glad you're back. Tellin' your tale.

LOVE the haircut. Serious scissor skillz, indeed.

Maybe he's American. We toss out Canadian money all the time.

And we toss out American money, too.

Mel, thanks for coming back and bringing the funny. We missed you.

And I agree.

The seahorses look alot like a chicken fingers. Can't vouch for the General's carrot mold. But I agree with chicken fingers.

NM

 

[1000thhappyhaunt]

Again I'm fartootst.

Yeah.

I THOUGHT I smelled a lil sumpin' sumpin'.

 

[celerystalker]

Lovin the Tommy mad scissors skills. I'm due for a hair cut. Does he accept American money (None of that Canadian carp!)?
Although I would like to see pictures of it. All I ever see is the carppy coins that look like ours until you try to spend them.

 

[Crazy Kanga]

Man, I have a hard time keepin' up
with your mad trippin' skills, but
what I'm tryin' to say is
I'm glad you're back
from your mid-winter funkatude
Roll Tide
cuz I'm a T-Towner

 

[Mr. Silly]

Hey Mel, glad to see you updating the report. It's swell, as always.

...
Calvin wanted to see the manatee poop again. And eat alot of lettuce. And, failing that, to go to the souvenier area and squander his not-so-hard-earned
money. From The Revered/Loathed General. As quickly and as effortlessly as possible.
...
Tommy wanted to watch the manatee poop, too. But he also wanted a Caesar Salad.
Which grossed me out.

Those manatees are prolific. We saw them poop a number of times.

On a poop-related note, I lost count of the number of times someone in our group (okay... it might have been me fairly often) said "look at the size of that poop!" while we were in Animal Kingdom. BTW, they have this great display of huge varnished poops of various species in the Rafiki's Planet Watch area.

...

The Brotherly Assault of LOVE.

Calvin decided to kick Tommy in the leg. Out of the blue. Or out of boredom. Or frustration. Or happiness. Or because he's tired. Or hungry. Or it's his birthday. Or he's partying like it's 1999.

What a prince!

And after he clocks him... he looks around. To see if I saw him.

If I did. And... if I'm staring at Calvin. Hard.

He finishes the assault by grabbing Tommy and hugging him. Hard.

While still looking at me.

It's the way of the Brothers.
...

And I can't believe they are actually fighting at Disney.

AT DISNEY.

Calvin's face is blind rage.

They are rumpled.

Sweaty.

Stressed.

It was real fighting. They were going to town. Not just doing the Ultimate Playfighting thing.

Maybe everyone was hungry. Bored. Happy. Sad. Whatever.

But... no one FIGHTS at DISNEY!!!

Come ON!!!!

When I was a kid my brother and I fought constantly, especially if we were on a vacation. We never fought in Disney World, but only because we never went there. We fought in DisneyLand a bunch of times. We always did the real knd of fighting too. I have a few cracked ribs, and a few broken toes to show for it.

While this is only loosely related to anything, when we were in Cub Scouts we went to this animal shelter where they kept exotic animals that people kept as pets and then realized they could not care for. It was there that I first learned that there really is such a thing as Purina Monkey Chow.

Anyway, my brother walked up to a monkey cage and put his face right up to the bars. The monkey shot across the cage, grabbed a big handful of hair, and started pulling. My brother and I had fought earlier that day so I just laughed and pointed as he screamed like a little girl. It took the people who worked there about 20 minutes to finally get the monkey to let him go. That's a memory I will always cherish.

And... singing... at the top of their lungs:

"WHEN YOU'RE SLIDING INTO THIRD AND YOU SMELL THE JUICY TURD...

D-I-A-R-R-H-E-A!!!!!! DIARRHEA!!!!!!!"


Sigh...

I remember singing that little ditty as a youth. Those songs just never die do they?

 

[Shelby5514]

Oooh goody! An update just in time for a little celebration.

Happy 1st Maelstrom Melly!

 

[pongoperdigirl]

MELLY!!!!!!

Glad to read your latest installment.


(You sad neuticle!!!!!!)
I am DED.

 

[scrap4u]

Welcome back Mel! So glad to see you've updated your report. We were beginning to think you forgot your peeps!

Thanks for the fun update. Looking forward to more.

 

[LaLa]

And has she been gone? Somewhere? Funny. I didn't notice.

Or did I?

We got apple juice, grape juice, orange juice and tomato juice.

"WHEN YOU'RE SLIDING INTO THIRD AND YOU SMELL THE JUICY TURD...

D-I-A-R-R-H-E-A!!!!!! DIARRHEA!!!!!!!"

No wonder the kids have the squirts. They're on the freakin' Hollywood Diet! Canadian style. Which basically just means it's served over ice.

And after he clocks him... he looks around. To see if I saw him.

If I did. And... if I'm staring at Calvin. Hard.

He finishes the assault by grabbing Tommy and hugging him. Hard.

While still looking at me.

I can totally see this and it cracks me up.

Or he's partying like it's 1999.

What a prince!

Were you dreaming when you wrote this? And if so, were you wearing a raspberry beret while you drove your little red corvette through the purple rain?

Melly, so glad to see you back again, Woman. I can't wait to hear how the rest of the vacation went. Seeing as how it's only roughly ONE YEAR LATER! Talk about keeping us hanging!

Bring it Mel. You still ROCK.

 

[tinkgurl]

The boys walking together. Through Disney.

In the sunshine.

And... singing... at the top of their lungs:

"WHEN YOU'RE SLIDING INTO THIRD AND YOU SMELL THE JUICY TURD...

D-I-A-R-R-H-E-A!!!!!! DIARRHEA!!!!!!!"

So if I'm ever in WDW and hear that song, I'll guess it's your boys!

 

[tarheel]

So glad to see you're back!!! So, how many trips have you had since this one? I hope you come back to finish this one, the other one, and any new ones. I really enjoy your writing!

 

[MommyPoppins]

Glad to have you back!



Boy I missed Calvin!

Originally Posted by 1000thhappyhaunt
The boys walking together. Through Disney.

In the sunshine.

And... singing... at the top of their lungs:

"WHEN YOU'RE SLIDING INTO THIRD AND YOU SMELL THE JUICY TURD...

D-I-A-R-R-H-E-A!!!!!! DIARRHEA!!!!!!!"

Reminds me of our trip to Walmart a few weeks ago for provisions. We were walking down the canned meats/beans row and my boys screamed in unison. "MOM! FART BEANS! GET FART BEANS!"

 

[DptyDogg]

I was growing quite concerned that your trip report was canceled prior to the completion of the story

But that would just figure, they cancel all my favorite shows.

 

[1000thhappyhaunt]

Thanks for welcoming Me(l) back!

DJR ~ Hey bud! Yeah. That makes TWO of us.

daly7something ~ I saw that bananaman. You're on IGNORE!

Tinky38 ~ You're right. I'm pretty much makin' it all up. OR AM I?

Kay7979 ~ Nice sigie.

NM ~ I MISSED you too! Or did I? Pass the plum sauce.

Celerystalker ~ Celery! Always a sweet crunchy treat! Good to see ya. Borg on the Disney addiction!

C Kanga ~ T-Towner, eh? My sympathies.

Admiral Silli ~ DED. That's all. Oh. Nice snail(s).

Shell-bee ~ You're so TINY in that pic in your sigie! Apparently thinner thighs cameth!

Pongopuppy ~ You sad neuticle, too. I am DED.

Scrap4U ~ Bananaman.

La La ~ Who's LaLaaaaaaaaaaaaa? Heh heh. Could u be (could u b) the most beautiful girl in the world? So beautiful, so beautiful. It's plain 2 see (plain 2 c) ure the reason that God made a girl.

Perhaps I was dreamin' when I wrote that. Heh eh heh.

Tinkgirliegirl ~ It's either us happyhaunts. Or the ZZUBs.

tarheel ~ Nice Tigger! Got two Disney trips comin' up. Again. Gonna need my OWN trippie sub-board here. I think. Heh heh.

MommyP ~ We don't have a canned meats/beans aisle. At our grocery store. Now I'm saddest ever.

D-Dogg ~ Heh heh. I've seen you before. I think. Anywho... It's worth more like freakin' 2.5 grand. In my humble(ish) opinion.

ZZUB ~




Cheers, Mel.

 

[daly7o9]

daly7something ~ I saw that bananaman. You're on IGNORE!

I'm afraid I've committed some sort of DIS faux pas (thats Canadian). Or is it focaccia? No...thats Italian. I shall heretofore cease the use of the dancing yellow offender lest I unwittingly offend someone else. What?...Is it like giving someone the finger or something? Anyway...keep on writin' 'cos you crack me up!

 

[1000thhappyhaunt]

I'm afraid I've committed some sort of DIS faux pas (thats Canadian). Or is it focaccia? No...thats Italian. I shall heretofore cease the use of the dancing yellow offender lest I unwittingly offend someone else. What?...Is it like giving someone the finger or something? Anyway...keep on writin' 'cos you crack me up!

You're not really on ignore.

'Cause I'm BORG with you on the 7o9.


Mel.