Amazed

[Leajess99]

Today I was dropping my youngest off at school and saw something that just blew me away.

Our school has 3 options for getting kids to school in the morning. They are (in no real order):

Option 1: Riding the bus - every child living in the school's district have this option to include kids living right across the road from the school as it is a rural school

Option 2: Park in front and walk kids into the school or even their classroom

Option 3: Drive to the back where the drop off line is and school staff is waiting to get the kids out of the car.

I live out of district so I have to drop my daughter off at school daily. I get there early enough to get back home so I can make sure the older kids make their buses which come between 7:30 and 7:40.

Last Friday I ended up stuck behind this vehicle that was taking forever for the school staff to do something in the back seat. I never saw a child get out of the vehicle so was unclear of what the deal was.

Well this morning I found myself again behind this vehicle and again it was taking forever. Well this morning the man finally got out of the front seat while the school staff member was messing around in the back seat. The man was fully dressed in pajamas. He never did anything to help the school staff member, he just stood there. A few minutes late the driver stepped out of the vehicle. Finally the school staff member pulled a child out of the vehicle.

This child was the same size as my 2nd grade daughter and while it does not say what age the child truely is, the child was not small is my point. The school staff member attempted to set the child down on his legs only for the child to refuse to stand up. The staff member had to carry this child into the school.

I was just amazed that this child's family seemed to feel it was the school staff member's job to get the child into the school and his classroom.

Now, we have been in school since the first week of August so one would think a child would be used to the idea of going to school. I do realize that the child could have issues but I still feel it is the parent's responsibility to get their child to the classroom and not the school staff members. My daughter falls in the 50th percentile for weight and is not short by any means. I can't carry her and would never expect a school staff member to carry her unless she was hurt and unable to walk.

How would you have handled this type of situation IF it was your child throwing a fit and not wanting to go to school?? Oh and apparently the child was fighting the school staff member trying to unbuckle him.


Also, if you are a school staff member, would you carry a child to his class if he was throwing a fit about going to school?? I honestly don't see why the school would expect a staff member to risk injury to carry a child throwing a fit to their class.

 

[woodkins]

We do not know the circumstances of this child, they could be special needs. If the child has separation issues, it may actually be better for the parent to have the child removed from the vehicle by a staff member rather than to have the parent engage & then have to separate from the parent. The staff member could be an aide or therapist or teacher trained to work with that student according to their special circumstances.

Our building houses many of the special ed classes with the more handicapped children and we see students of ALL ages and sizes having meltdowns, "tantrums" and behavioral issues on a daily basis. Many of these students are non-verbal etc.

Be careful to judge without knowing all of the circumstances involved....and even then try not to judge

 

[ChrizJen]

If I were that parent, I would park in the space provided and take my child in myself. I would never expect a school staff member to carry my child in!! That's insane! And if I were the staff member, I woudn't have carried the child!! I would have said, "You walk, or you don't come to school!".

And I realize it's entirely possible the child may have had issues which make it difficult to walk. But again, I would expect the parent to step up and take responsibility. The parent should have taken the child into the school. People really can be amazing sometimes...

 

[WDWisTheBest]

We do not know the circumstances of this child, they could be special needs. If the child has separation issues, it may actually be better for the parent to have the child removed from the vehicle by a staff member rather than to have the parent engage & then have to separate from the parent. The staff member could be an aide or therapist or teacher trained to work with that student according to their special circumstances.

Our building houses many of the special ed classes with the more handicapped children and we see students of ALL ages and sizes having meltdowns, "tantrums" and behavioral issues on a daily basis. Many of these students are non-verbal etc.

Be careful to judge without knowing all of the circumstances involved....and even then try not to judge

You took the thoughts right out of many viewers. What we don't know may cause problems if we try to interject without all the facts

 

[Liberty Belle]

Today I was dropping my youngest off at school and saw something that just blew me away.

Our school has 3 options for getting kids to school in the morning. They are (in no real order):

Option 1: Riding the bus - every child living in the school's district have this option to include kids living right across the road from the school as it is a rural school

Option 2: Park in front and walk kids into the school or even their classroom

Option 3: Drive to the back where the drop off line is and school staff is waiting to get the kids out of the car.

I live out of district so I have to drop my daughter off at school daily. I get there early enough to get back home so I can make sure the older kids make their buses which come between 7:30 and 7:40.

Last Friday I ended up stuck behind this vehicle that was taking forever for the school staff to do something in the back seat. I never saw a child get out of the vehicle so was unclear of what the deal was.

Well this morning I found myself again behind this vehicle and again it was taking forever. Well this morning the man finally got out of the front seat while the school staff member was messing around in the back seat. The man was fully dressed in pajamas. He never did anything to help the school staff member, he just stood there. A few minutes late the driver stepped out of the vehicle. Finally the school staff member pulled a child out of the vehicle.

This child was the same size as my 2nd grade daughter and while it does not say what age the child truely is, the child was not small is my point. The school staff member attempted to set the child down on his legs only for the child to refuse to stand up. The staff member had to carry this child into the school.

I was just amazed that this child's family seemed to feel it was the school staff member's job to get the child into the school and his classroom.

Now, we have been in school since the first week of August so one would think a child would be used to the idea of going to school. I do realize that the child could have issues but I still feel it is the parent's responsibility to get their child to the classroom and not the school staff members. My daughter falls in the 50th percentile for weight and is not short by any means. I can't carry her and would never expect a school staff member to carry her unless she was hurt and unable to walk.

How would you have handled this type of situation IF it was your child throwing a fit and not wanting to go to school?? Oh and apparently the child was fighting the school staff member trying to unbuckle him.


Also, if you are a school staff member, would you carry a child to his class if he was throwing a fit about going to school?? I honestly don't see why the school would expect a staff member to risk injury to carry a child throwing a fit to their class.

If it were my child, I would park and walk them in.

I've had to carry children in before. They usually had special needs. Most staff who works with special needs children have to get trained in how to properly carry and restrain children (at least here in Kentucky).

 

[Allison]

There simply way too much missing information to be able to make any kind of judgement about what is appropriate here.

 

[Leajess99]

We do not know the circumstances of this child, they could be special needs. If the child has separation issues, it may actually be better for the parent to have the child removed from the vehicle by a staff member rather than to have the parent engage & then have to separate from the parent. The staff member could be an aide or therapist or teacher trained to work with that student according to their special circumstances.

Our building houses many of the special ed classes with the more handicapped children and we see students of ALL ages and sizes having meltdowns, "tantrums" and behavioral issues on a daily basis. Many of these students are non-verbal etc.

Be careful to judge without knowing all of the circumstances involved....and even then try not to judge

Our school only has 1 special needs class and those children are brought in by a small bus. We do have some students who do have autism but they are high functioning. The school district have different special needs classes in different schools.

The staff members who do morning drop off are the Guidance Counselor, Assistant principal, PE Teacher, and one office lady( the one carrying the child this morning). This has been the same since last year.

I am not trying to judge but curious as to how others would react on this. I do NOT expect teachers to risk injury to get my child to school. This is the first time in 2 years that I have ever seen a school staff member have to carry a child into the school. At her old school I saw parents have to carry a child into the school throwing a fit but never a school staff member.

 

[luvsJack]

While it may be possible that there are disabilities here, if the child could not stand or walk wouldn't there have been a wheelchair, crutches, or some other devise to help the child be mobile? There are several children that attend dd's school that cannot walk and none of them are carried.

As for seperation anxiety, this really isn't the best way to handle it. Its just making the child resent the teachers which is making the anxiety worse. It would be better for the parent to get the child in the classroom and then say "I am leaving now. I will pick you up after school." and leave.

There could be a hundred reasons why this is happening and it doesn't really mean that these are bad parents or that this is a bad kid, but, I think the parent should take more responsiblity for getting the child in the school.

 

[Leajess99]

If it were my child, I would park and walk them in.

I've had to carry children in before. They usually had special needs. Most staff who works with special needs children have to get trained in how to properly carry and restrain children (at least here in Kentucky).

Is one form simply holding them under their arms up off the ground?? Just wondering as that is how she was carrying him in. I honestly have NEVER seen this before and seeing that the parents never helped to get the child out of the car just blew me away.

 

[rie'smom]

At my daughter's elementary school, there was a girl who had a bone disease and had to be carried into school. The school's policy was/is that parents do not get out of the car to take their child into school.
Maybe too this is an insurance policy issue at your daughter's school. Some insurance carriers are very particular about how special needs children are handled at school. The person carrying in the child could be their shadow helper or designated as the person to help transport these students.

 

[tlbwriter]

I agree we don't know the backstory, but it seems like if this was a special needs child who needed to be carried, the staff member would have known that and would not have put him on the ground in the first place. Unless it was a child who has good days and bad days, I guess.

 

[Magic Mom]

Our school only has 1 special needs class and those children are brought in by a small bus. We do have some students who do have autism but they are high functioning. The school district have different special needs classes in different schools.

The staff members who do morning drop off are the Guidance Counselor, Assistant principal, PE Teacher, and one office lady( the one carrying the child this morning). This has been the same since last year.

I am not trying to judge but curious as to how others would react on this. I do NOT expect teachers to risk injury to get my child to school. This is the first time in 2 years that I have ever seen a school staff member have to carry a child into the school. At her old school I saw parents have to carry a child into the school throwing a fit but never a school staff member.

My guess is they are having some behavioral issues regarding getting to school and getting settled in and this is how the school and parent have decided to handle the situation at this point. Having the parent carry the child in may create a bigger scene and cause stronger acting out.

Two other things to consider are even though a special needs bus is provided, not all kids may ride it; and if this is a behavioral issue that child might not currently be in a behavior unit. It isn't as easy as saying "Suzie is repeatedly acting out so let's try her out in the behavioral unit." It takes time to have a child placed in that kind of class.

If it is causing you to be late, then you could always walk your child in yourself.

 

[okeydokey]

When my son was in Kindergarten there was a little girl in his class that was on the sensitive side but she was fine going to school every day. In the middle of the year, the Mom got quite ill and it really effected the girl. She would cry daily and not want to leave her Mom's car. For a short time (a few weeks) the school guidance counselor would come out in the AM to the drop off line and escort the child from the car to the school. A few weeks later, Mom was better and the little girl readjusted to going back to school without tears.

School personnel are often counted on to do a whole lot more than just teach kids to read and write. In this case, the girl needed a little help and she received it and now all is fine.

 

[The Mystery Machine]

I would sympathize with the driver of the vehicle and the child. BTDT

 

[marmalade]

If I witnessed that while dropping my kids off to school I would think there is a reason it is being done that way, and not think of it again. I guess that's just me, but I tend to give people the benefit of the doubt.

 

[rchristiansen]

Oh don't get me started on school drop off and pick up! There are so many parents that can't just drop off their kid and drive off - making us wait behind them. They have to watch their kid walk into the school and hold up the rest of the line. That drives me bananas.

But that is weird that a school staff member had to get the kid out of the car. It's not the staff's responsibility to get the child into the school. IMO.

DH & I were part of a group at the end of last year that helped revamp our DD's school insane pickup/drop off fiasco. We got to wear the orange vests and everything just like Mr. Mom!


It's much better now - We have this circle drive at the school where all the cars wait in line, move up into the 7 pick up spots (Sort of like the tomorrowland speedway) and then drive off when their kid gets into the car. It's all single file so no one gets run over. and it takes about 7-8 minutes to get the whole thing done. But even with this new system I've seen some moronic, rude and lazy parents:

• I had a big burly guy get in my face and yell at me when I tried to explain to him where he had to be in line for pick up. For the first few weeks of this new system we had to had police car parked out front - I pointed the police car out to the man and he proceeded to go yell at the school office staff instead.
  
• I had a grandma refuse to move her car because she wanted to see her grandson come out of the building at the end of the day.
  
• Many many times I have seen people not want to get into the back of the line so they back up into the spot before the number 1 spot so they can be first at pickup.
  
• And this was the worst: One day, while we were waiting for pickup I saw this car zoom past the line and around the circle. I noticed there was a baby in the backseat. She double parked the car - KEPT IT RUNNING - got out and went in to pick up a kid inside - With the baby alone in the back seat!

 

[Liberty Belle]

Is one form simply holding them under their arms up off the ground?? Just wondering as that is how she was carrying him in. I honestly have NEVER seen this before and seeing that the parents never helped to get the child out of the car just blew me away.

Not that I remember, but they're carried/held incorrectly quite often, unfortunately.

I haven't had the training for a few years because I have herniated discs and am no longer allowed to do it.

 

[WeLoveLilo05]

First I have to say we have the same 3 options as you do in terms of pick-up and drop off lol.

We had issues with DD for the first 2 days of school, as she was new to K and school in general. Me and fiance took her and I took her in the school the first day and she hid under the table and screamed and cried. Took her a whole hour to finally calm down and go see what K was all about (and she met her teacher the day before and saw her classroom at orientation). When she left the principal sat down with us and I told him I was sorry for her behavior. He is very nice, he's an awesome principal and said don't worry about it, its nothing kids are kids they go through things. He said he's had to pull kids off buses, had kids spit at him, kick him, etc. The next day she was ok. the 3rd day for whatever reason she flipped again and wouldn't move from the hallway, yes I brought her in the building (I always walk her up and ring the bell and open the door and say bye to her), didn't expect a teacher to take her out of the car, but the guidance counselor told me "just go". Sometimes I think parents may make it worse if that makes any sense. Kids know how to play their parents.

In maybe November I noticed a mom and daughter, the daughter must have been in 4th or 5th grade. For whatever reason the daughter did not want to go into the school, maybe didn't want to leave mom, I am not sure. But the principal would come outside to talk with the girl and the girl would run. It was really sad to watch. I don't know what this girl is going through (maybe she lost someone close to her, maybe special needs, IDK) but I just felt so bad for the mom because I know what that feeling is like.

I def. wouldn't pass judgement on it. Maybe the school told the parents that this way was better for your child to adjust or whatever the case may be. Maybe the child has special needs. This teacher may be the only teacher who is trained in restraint training and for all we know this child may have a need (maybe on the autism spectrum)?

 

[ccgirl]

Our school only has 1 special needs class and those children are brought in by a small bus. We do have some students who do have autism but they are high functioning. The school district have different special needs classes in different schools.

The staff members who do morning drop off are the Guidance Counselor, Assistant principal, PE Teacher, and one office lady( the one carrying the child this morning). This has been the same since last year.

I am not trying to judge but curious as to how others would react on this. I do NOT expect teachers to risk injury to get my child to school. This is the first time in 2 years that I have ever seen a school staff member have to carry a child into the school. At her old school I saw parents have to carry a child into the school throwing a fit but never a school staff member.

They are high functioning as far as you know. Their may be children you don't know about. Honestly, I just worry about my own children and not worry about why others are behaving/being treated the way they do. Things are not always as they seem, you can't judge a book by it's cover and all that good stuff.

 

[Magpie]

I'd be curious, but knowing that I didn't have all the facts, I'd give the father the benefit of the doubt. The family may acting be under the guidance of a psychologist, in partnership with the school. He may have been told NOT to interfere.

The fact that the dad was still in his pjs says to me that just getting the kid fed, dressed, out the door and into the car must have been quite the challenge!

Just because the child isn't in the special needs class, doesn't mean she doesn't have special needs. This particular child's issues might be psychological in nature. Maybe she's fine once she gets inside and away from the parent. Who knows?

I sympathize with your desire to know the story, however! I bet there are people in the school who could tell you, if you knew who to ask. How plugged in are you to the gossip?