Alcohol at Chuck E Cheese yes or no - What do you think??

[Tiger926]

Sorry, been away from the boards for a few days dealing with a family emergency. Here are my responses:

1. Typo error - meant to say that cigarettes, alcohol and coffee are LEGAL drugs, not illegal - everyone knows that cigarettes, alcohol and caffeine aren't illegal, come on people! Doesn't matter what you all say in sarcasm, but caffeine, nicotene and alcohol are all drugs. Check out the latest stats for how much of this stuff is consumed on a daily basis in U.S. or Canada - people are addicted because they are drugs (the health unit nurse just gave us a great presentation a few months ago about these very drugs). Sorry to burst your bubbles, but that's a fact!

2. I specifically said in my response that I've counselled tons of kids who have told me that they drink because they watched their parents do it, plain and simple. You can't say I'm wrong, when my students have told me this a million times! They continually tell me each and everyday that they can't stop drinking (all underage, by the way) or smoking (pot or cigarettes) because they are surrounded by it each and everyday at home - their parents are bigger influences than peers. If you all don't believe me, you're welcome to visit my school anytime and I'll have a line up kids ready to speak to you about this very subject!

3. My students also continually question each and everyday why it's ok to drink coffee (they are addicted to it), smoke cigarettes and drink alcohol, but it's not ok to smoke pot? My country of Canada has been batting around the idea of legalizing pot for a few years now - very confusing message for kids. We then talk about governments needing their tax dollars, etc. - very interesting and astute observations from 15 and 16 year olds as to why some drugs like caffeine are acceptable, but pot is not.

4. I still stand by my ascertation that alcohol is not needed at a kids' establishment, period as it just teaches kids that it's a necessary part of life - I have heard this a million times from my students. Regardless of why many of you drink, it's not a necessity. Eating and breathing are necessities, not consuming alcohol! Again, not being able to get by for an hour at Chuck E Cheeses without consuming alcohol is not positive modelling, IMHO.

5. Some of you mentioned morality and taboo activities and I disagree here as well. I don't teach my students that it's taboo and they are going to go to hell if they consume it, give me a break! Example: I have many students who drink each and everyday, but they would fall into your definition of 'moderation' as they only drink one beer a day. Why does a 15 yr. old need to consume one beer a day? Big problem here! Moderation is a very subjective term and the whole issue of kids wanting to do it more because adults tell them not to is the way it is because it's hypocritical! They can't drink at 15, but it's ok at 19 (that's the legal age in my country). Why all of a sudden is it ok at 19? Most of my kids will tell you nothing, and that is why they have been drinking since they were 9 and 10 years old.

I do have very strong beliefs about what makes a good parent or good role model , and drinking is not one of them. For me, it doesn't matter if it's in moderation - who is to say what the accurate definition of 'moderation' is? Again, many of you are missing the boat when it comes to teens. My students continually tell me that I have had more positive influence on them than anyone else in their lives - despite what some of you may think, I don't judge them, and I don't lecture. I am honest about the fact that I made positive choices in my life: not to drink, smoke or do drugs. I teach them how to make suitable & responsible choices and to take accountability for their actions - these are things that many parents have problems with these days. I teach them that one can have a very full life without drinking, smoking or doing drugs - imagine that! Many of you wouldn't be surprised though to know that this is a very daunting task based on the sarcastic responses I received to my post - how do you expect kids not to drink when you as parents can't get by at a kids' birthday party without doing it?

Tiger

 

[Tigger&Belle]

I do have very strong beliefs about what makes a good parent or good role model , and drinking is not one of them. For me, it doesn't matter if it's in moderation - who is to say what the accurate definition of 'moderation' is? Again, many of you are missing the boat when it comes to teens. My students continually tell me that I have had more positive influence on them than anyone else in their lives - despite what some of you may think, I don't judge them, and I don't lecture. I am honest about the fact that I made positive choices in my life: not to drink, smoke or do drugs. I teach them how to make suitable & responsible choices and to take accountability for their actions - these are things that many parents have problems with these days. I teach them that one can have a very full life without drinking, smoking or doing drugs - imagine that! Many of you wouldn't be surprised though to know that this is a very daunting task based on the sarcastic responses I received to my post - how do you expect kids not to drink when you as parents can't get by at a kids' birthday party without doing it?

Tiger

In my opinion it's all about moderation. Period, plain and simple. If a parent can't drink in moderation I don't think that they should drink. Like I pointed out to you, I am a good role model to my kids--we drink in moderation, we do not get drunk, and we do not drive under the influence. My parents were not good role models. Not because they didn't drink (people shouldn't drink if they don't want to), but because they only did it to be good rold models). They did not show us responsible drinking and were shocked when we drank as teens. Big surprise.

And more than them not showing us responsible drinking was that it was a taboo topic. So for all parents, have an open dialog in the home. Discuss these things with your children. Pass your values to them. Communicate!

Tiger926, I do think that's the one thing that we agree on. You are communicating with your students. That may be what they are missing out on at home and why you are such a positive role model to the kids.

 

[Beth76]

4. I still stand by my ascertation that alcohol is not needed at a kids' establishment, period as it just teaches kids that it's a necessary part of life - I have heard this a million times from my students. Regardless of why many of you drink, it's not a necessity. Eating and breathing are necessities, not consuming alcohol! Again, not being able to get by for an hour at Chuck E Cheeses without consuming alcohol is not positive modelling, IMHO.

Most thing we use in our daily life are not necessary. The computer is not necessary, the internet isn't either. Cars aren't necessary. Air conditioning. Indoor plumbing. Pizza. Potato chips. Disney World. Heck! Even CEC's isn't necessary. So what's your point? If you don't like something you have every right not to partake in it. It doesn't automatically make it bad for everyone else.

I specifically said in my response that I've counselled tons of kids who have told me that they drink because they watched their parents do it, plain and simple. You can't say I'm wrong, when my students have told me this a million times! They continually tell me each and everyday that they can't stop drinking (all underage, by the way) or smoking (pot or cigarettes) because they are surrounded by it each and everyday at home - their parents are bigger influences than peers. If you all don't believe me, you're welcome to visit my school anytime and I'll have a line up kids ready to speak to you about this very subject!

I'm guessing that your students parents aren't the type to just have a glass of wine or beer with dinner. If they're smoking pot around their kids, sounds like we're talking about low income families here and they have bigger problems. My parents drank around me and I never felt the need to go out and get trashed in high school "because I saw them do it". Sounds like a cop-out to me.

 

[Nancyg56]

I also have strong beliefs about child rearing....I raised 3 and all are gainfully employed, productive, responsible members of society.

I know that children are influenced by their environment, but I also know that there are so many other factors that influence addictive behaviors, and I would think that you, as an educator would understand this also. I wonder if the kids who you are councelling are telling you what you want to hear, or what they think may get them the most sympathy for breaking the law. Underage drinking is not legal, nor is buying cigarrettes for underage children.
I know of several individuals who are roaring drunks who were raised in a home where drinking was not tolerated, and several who came from alcoholic homes who are tee totalers. DH and I never smoked, but our parents were heavy smokers. I question who missed the boat here.

You are advocating your belief systems, and that is your right, but to infer that people who do not subscribe to them are not responsible parents is judgemental. I also will point out that the teasing on this thread seemed to be tongue in cheek humor to me.

 

[lillygator]

As another poster mentioned - Tiger - there are many things in our daily lives that are not necessary....and I agree with Nancy - you are inferring that parents who aren't agreeing with your beliefs as not responsible....which would seem to say a lot about you and maybe how you teach your students.

How do you plan on teaching your children about alcohol? I've always found the kids who were banned from it to be the worst about trying it.

 

[CheshireVal]

4. I still stand by my ascertation that alcohol is not needed at a kids' establishment, period as it just teaches kids that it's a necessary part of life - I have heard this a million times from my students. Regardless of why many of you drink, it's not a necessity. Eating and breathing are necessities, not consuming alcohol! Again, not being able to get by for an hour at Chuck E Cheeses without consuming alcohol is not positive modelling, IMHO.

I don't think this is a very good argument. Just because something is *there* and *available* for people to have doesn't equate with teaching kids that it is a necessary part of life. I mean, come on!

The internet isn't a necessary part of life. Since you're using it, by your logic, you're teaching your kids that it's just as important as eating and breathing. Chuck E. Cheese itself isn't necessary to someone's life, so why bother going at all?

 

[RC Fan]

1. Typo error - meant to say that cigarettes, alcohol and coffee are LEGAL drugs, not illegal - everyone knows that cigarettes, alcohol and caffeine aren't illegal, come on people! Doesn't matter what you all say in sarcasm, but caffeine, nicotene and alcohol are all drugs. Check out the latest stats for how much of this stuff is consumed on a daily basis in U.S. or Canada - people are addicted because they are drugs (the health unit nurse just gave us a great presentation a few months ago about these very drugs). Sorry to burst your bubbles, but that's a fact!

2. I specifically said in my response that I've counselled tons of kids who have told me that they drink because they watched their parents do it, plain and simple. You can't say I'm wrong, when my students have told me this a million times! They continually tell me each and everyday that they can't stop drinking (all underage, by the way) or smoking (pot or cigarettes) because they are surrounded by it each and everyday at home - their parents are bigger influences than peers. If you all don't believe me, you're welcome to visit my school anytime and I'll have a line up kids ready to speak to you about this very subject!

3. My students also continually question each and everyday why it's ok to drink coffee (they are addicted to it), smoke cigarettes and drink alcohol, but it's not ok to smoke pot? My country of Canada has been batting around the idea of legalizing pot for a few years now - very confusing message for kids. We then talk about governments needing their tax dollars, etc. - very interesting and astute observations from 15 and 16 year olds as to why some drugs like caffeine are acceptable, but pot is not.

4. I still stand by my ascertation that alcohol is not needed at a kids' establishment, period as it just teaches kids that it's a necessary part of life - I have heard this a million times from my students. Regardless of why many of you drink, it's not a necessity. Eating and breathing are necessities, not consuming alcohol! Again, not being able to get by for an hour at Chuck E Cheeses without consuming alcohol is not positive modelling, IMHO.

5. Some of you mentioned morality and taboo activities and I disagree here as well. I don't teach my students that it's taboo and they are going to go to hell if they consume it, give me a break! Example: I have many students who drink each and everyday, but they would fall into your definition of 'moderation' as they only drink one beer a day. Why does a 15 yr. old need to consume one beer a day? Big problem here! Moderation is a very subjective term and the whole issue of kids wanting to do it more because adults tell them not to is the way it is because it's hypocritical! They can't drink at 15, but it's ok at 19 (that's the legal age in my country). Why all of a sudden is it ok at 19? Most of my kids will tell you nothing, and that is why they have been drinking since they were 9 and 10 years old.

I do have very strong beliefs about what makes a good parent or good role model , and drinking is not one of them. For me, it doesn't matter if it's in moderation - who is to say what the accurate definition of 'moderation' is? Again, many of you are missing the boat when it comes to teens. My students continually tell me that I have had more positive influence on them than anyone else in their lives - despite what some of you may think, I don't judge them, and I don't lecture. I am honest about the fact that I made positive choices in my life: not to drink, smoke or do drugs. I teach them how to make suitable & responsible choices and to take accountability for their actions - these are things that many parents have problems with these days. I teach them that one can have a very full life without drinking, smoking or doing drugs - imagine that! Many of you wouldn't be surprised though to know that this is a very daunting task based on the sarcastic responses I received to my post - how do you expect kids not to drink when you as parents can't get by at a kids' birthday party without doing it?

Tiger

We could easily argue that food, while not a drug, is addictive to some. Shall we ban all food? Perhaps alternatively we should teach kids responsible use, as with alcohol and anything else they encounter in life.

 

[Planogirl]

I presume that Tiger926 only counsels troubled kids and can't speak for those who don't have problems. Therefore I don't consider her "sampling" necessarily relevant to the population as a whole. Interesting way of thinking though.

 

[Tiger926]

I guess I'm confused why you would all assume that I counsel low income/troubled kids - tons of teachers in my family, and it doesn't matter rich, or poor (and I'm not sure why some of you would bring up the lower class/troubled issue), alcohol is a problem at all schools, period. In fact, the 'rich' kids in my neighborhood are the worst of the bunch!

Kids are drinking at very early ages, like 8 or 9. Perhaps you all don't see that in your communities, but it's very common in my city. It's amazing to me that some of you are arguing with me when what I am presenting is straight from the horse's mouths - most of them tell me that their parents were the ones who influenced their beliefs on alcohol and continue to do so. This is exactly why my kids have problems with their parents, as they say they don't listen! It doesn't matter if you don't agree with this, when my students who deal with this each and everyday express these views to me, I listen to them and go from there.

In regards to parenting, I never once said that parents who drink are 'bad'. I said that for me and my hubby, we don't feel it's a worthwhile activity as it really serves no purpose for us. Again, needing to drink at a kids' birthday party is not good modelling to me - it doesn't mean that I am a better parent because I don't drink - I never once said this either. Our daughter is not going to be raised around alcohol as we don't have it in our home - she will be taught that it is not necessary to partake in alcohol, but if she feels it necessary to do so, it will be in moderation when she is of age. You don't need to have experience with something to be able to teach someone how to act responsibly. Our parenting teacher doesn't have kids, and he's an excellent parenting teacher - just because my hubby and I don't drink, it doesn't mean our daughter is going to run out and drink at the first opportunity - it's all about education and guidance and it's very important to me as both a teacher and parent, to teach children that there are other options available for them besides drinking and smoking.

Tiger

 

[Tigger&Belle]

she will be taught that it is not necessary to partake in alcohol, but if she feels it necessary to do so, it will be in moderation when she is of age. You don't need to have experience with something to be able to teach someone how to act responsibly.

Tiger

Guess again--you won't tell you DD what she'll do. Doesn't work that way as a parent. You'll teach her your values and why they are your values, but if you think that you can micro-manage her to the extent that you can tell her that "if you ever drink you will be of age and you will do it in moderation" you are mistaken. You can tell her that you hope that she makes that decision and these are the reasons, but it is her decision, and only her decision, just as it was your decision and your DH's decision.

One other thing that I tell my kids is to not put themselves in situations where they will be tempted to try things that they don't really want to do. They are less likely to cave into peer pressure if they are not in a situation where they are being pressured.

We do our best with our kids and then we give them the freedom fly. They may fail at times, but hopefully not in any big ways. More often than not, they show us what good, responsible adults they've become.

 

[elizke]

it's a loud flashing monstrocity uniquely designed to part you from your cash in a long and painful process...

You've described the place perfectly!!!!!!! : ))))

I've been forced to do the CEC thing for years. First with the step kids 20 years ago, when it was called something else (I've repressed the name), and now with my own kids. I usually have a beer or two a day in the evenings at home, and I also do when we go out to a restaurant. But I've never had one at CEC. I don't know why. I just don't relax in that horrible atmosphere. The kids get so incredibly greedy and I'm stressed by it all and a beer will be wasted.

E.

 

[CheshireVal]

Our daughter is not going to be raised around alcohol as we don't have it in our home - she will be taught that it is not necessary to partake in alcohol, but if she feels it necessary to do so, it will be in moderation when she is of age.
Tiger

I still think you're misusing the word 'necessary.' Your daughter won't try alcohol when she feels it's "necessary" to do so. If she tries alcohol, it will be because she wants to.

I like to have a beer at Epcot, not because I find it necessary, but because I want to.

There's a difference. I don't think people are saying that they HAVE to have a drink during a birthday party at CEC. They just want to.

Nothing wrong with that. In my eyes, anyway!

 

[cristit14]

As a former cast member of CEC (yes they call employees cast members too) and manager wine and Beer have been served for at least the past 15 years at CEC. We carded everyone we needed to and people could purchase beer 1 at a time per person/ID Considering all of the things that go on there alcohol is the least of the problems!- and yes we did cut people off or call the police numerous times if they were getting out of control.

Also as a former cast member, I can say that we served beer/wine at least 20 years ago. I worked there for 5 or 6 years while in high school and college. I do remember seeing drunk people every once in awhile, but that definately wasn't the norm.... I don't think it is a problem that they serve it there at all.

 

[SamIAm21]

I think if you go to Chuck E. Cheese, you need the alchohol to dim the pain!

Ok...that was a joke.... nobody go and get all "bunched" up!

My thoughts exactly. Chuck E. Cheese is punishing enough, don't take away my glass of really cheap wine.

 

[Tiger926]

CheshireVal - I guess I can see how the use of the word 'necessary' may be confusing - if it's confusing to other adults, then it may be confusing to my daughter, thanks for pointing that out!

My hubby and I really have a dislike for alcohol as both sides of our families have had huge issues with it, and I teach tons of kids who do as well, so for us, it's not a part of our lives at all, and so that's where our strong beliefs come from. We really pride ourselves on not consuming any of the following chemicals at alll: no caffeine, nicotene, alcohol or illicit drugs, and being able to still have very full lives in the process. I word it this way because a lot of my students and even many adults I meet, assume that we have boring and unhappy lives because we don't drink - hmm? It's kind of sad to me that people feel that drinking alcohol makes them happier. It's also sad to me that people think I must be unhappy or a boring person because I don't drink.

Now am I saying that those of you who drink are 'bad' or that you are wasting your lives? Absolutely not, as that is not my place. I answered the original post about whether or not alcohol should be served at Chuck E Cheese or other kid events, and my answer was 'No.' I really do feel based on what my students have told me, that it sends conflicting messages to kids. I guess I wonder how do explain to your kids that it's ok for you to drink, but not them? We did not serve alcohol at my daughter's baptism, nor do we do so at her birthday parties - if people want to drink alcohol, then they need to do it elsewhere as my hubby and I do not want alcohol around our daughter. We also do this out of respect for my mom as well, as she despises alcohol as she was physically and mentally abused by alcoholics until she was a teen.

Tiger

 

[jekajekalynn]

I dunno...doesn't sound right to me... Are people THAT desperate for booze?

 

[pearlieq]

I guess I wonder how do explain to your kids that it's ok for you to drink, but not them?

That's pretty easy. The explanation is simply "There are certain priviliges and responsibilites that are reserved for adults because they are expected to be mature enough to handle them responsibly. When you are an adult, you will old enough to think through all the factors of the decision and decide for yourself if you want to drink."

It's no different than the right to drive, vote, smoke, or enter into a contract. Adult decisions are reserved for adults and children should be taught to understand that. I don't think creating a Fantasyland for children where alcohol doesn't exists helps them manage real life.

 

[Tiger926]

pearlieq - For our family, it's not a fantasyland, it's reality. It irritates me that those of you who drink think that you are more reasonable and realistic than we are because we don't drink. I absolutely have implied that children should be taught that alcohol is an adult activity, but to say that your reality is going to serve your kids better because it includes alcohol, is totally ridiculous. Fantasyland implies covering things up, not speaking the truth, and glossing things over to alter reality - we are not going to do anything of the kind when it comes to alcohol. We don't drink it and it's not in our home; therefore, we will have to teach our daughter about the fact that it is an activity that some people enjoy, as well as some people abuse, but to say that she is somehow going to be at a disadvantage because we don't drink is pretty backward logic if you ask me.

Tiger

 

[epcotfan]

How do you plan on teaching your children about alcohol? I've always found the kids who were banned from it to be the worst about trying it.

I agree. In university and high school it was the kids that had extremely strict parents that got the most wasted when alcohol was finally available to them. My parents and grandparents let me have a little glass of wine with dinner occasionally when I was growing up. So I learned to respect drinking from an early age. Sometimes just telling someone you can't have something makes them want it more.

 

[jodifla]

pearlieq - For our family, it's not a fantasyland, it's reality. It irritates me that those of you who drink think that you are more reasonable and realistic than we are because we don't drink. I absolutely have implied that children should be taught that alcohol is an adult activity, but to say that your reality is going to serve your kids better because it includes alcohol, is totally ridiculous. Fantasyland implies covering things up, not speaking the truth, and glossing things over to alter reality - we are not going to do anything of the kind when it comes to alcohol. We don't drink it and it's not in our home; therefore, we will have to teach our daughter about the fact that it is an activity that some people enjoy, as well as some people abuse, but to say that she is somehow going to be at a disadvantage because we don't drink is pretty backward logic if you ask me.

Tiger

I don't think she's at a disadvantage because you don't drink. I think she's at a disadvantage because of your extremely uptight, regimented attitude.

You wear it as a badge of honor that you don't drink coffee, alcohol, use tobacco. Well, goody for you, but you simply can't hide your condescending attitude toward the rest of us who choose to. So what if someone decides to have a beer at CEC? They serve alcohol at almost any restaurant you go to...

I personally think the drinking age should be 18 again, but that's another thread.