Advice/Help for traveling with 3 generations and differences

Moomduck1

DIS Veteran
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Nov 24, 2001
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This is a rather long explanation and question. I apologize. I just don't know what to do! Some background first...

I went to Disney as a kid with my grandparents and parents. Took my kids with their grandparents. Went with my adult kids and their spouses, and sometimes their grandparents. Went their with college age kids and their friends. And now I am in this very strange situation and I am honestly at a loss at what to do.

I (F60) and DH (70) went to Disneyland with our DD(36) and her husband (44), our DS(35) and his wife (35), and our grandchildren (7, 6, 3, 1.5) last year and had a wonderful time. At times my hubby and I would take the 2 little ones on some rides while everyone else rode things that the littles couldn't. Worked out well. There was one incident where I was with the 2 littles while everyone else was somewhere else and they ended up taking much longer than expected, I was texting everyone asking for help (the littles were not having it at this point) and no one could get to me to help. They all felt terrible, apologized profusely, my daughter-in-law ran and bought me a glass of wine, and it never happened again.

That reminded me of the year before that when we were all at Disney World, when one grandson (age 4 at the time) didn't want to ride Pirates, so my daughter-in-law took him on a different ride. We all had difficulty meeting up afterwards. I said to my son - hey let's not do that again. And it didn't happen again so I ended up forgetting about it.

Yesterday, we all went to a local amusement park. It was kind of a big deal because the 7 year old was able to ride something he wasn't able to ride the year before. The 6 year old was able to ride something he wasn't able to the year before, the 3 year old was able to ride something she wasn't able to the year before, and the 1.5 year old was going to ride rides for the first time. We were all looking forward to the trip. Hubby and I were going to be spending time with the 2 littles on the kiddie rides while DS/wife were on the bigger rides with the boys, with DD/hubby going with them. Everything started off great. Maybe an hour after we were there, DS joins us with the 6 year old. He wanted to ride the kiddie rides. OK. DS realizes he missed seeing the 1.5 on her rides for the first time, so now we are repeating all of the rides that he missed, instead of taking the kids on ones that they didn't ride yet. OK. Whatever. If the kids are happy, I'm happy. Then DD meets up with us. (we are in a group text chat asking where everyone is in order to meet up). Then everyone is together. Now the group splits up differently and they go in different directions. The rest of the day consists of the group chat with this constant - where is everyone - and trying to meet up. I never saw my 7 year old grandson ride anything. I missed seeing the 3 year old riding the log flume for the first time. At one point my hubby and I sat down and ate fries together, having no idea where anyone else was and wondering why we came in the first place.

While sitting there, we talked about what was going to happen on our Disney World trip this upcoming January. We are all going together again. Disney World is huge and very spread out! I do not want to spend the entire day on my phone with this group chat - where are you - all day long! I tried to talk to my son about it last night and he said that they just want all 4 of their kids to be happy. I said that being happy doesn't mean only going on the rides that they want to go on, and they should be learning how to have fun doing what others want. I said Disney should be a family trip.

I'm not trying to tell my son and his wife how to do Disney with their family. I do understand that it's their decision. But I'm now aware that all of us seem to have very different expectations of what this Disney trip is going to be like, and I really have no idea how to go there with everyone on the same page. How do I start the discussion so that I don't sound like I'm saying everyone has to do the trip my way? I don't want to sound like that, because I don't mean it like that. But, I also don't want to spend the entire day missing out on experiencing the park with my family. I don't want to be the "hub" that everyone keeps splitting off from and having this group chat all day long trying to meet back up. That doesn't work at Disney. The park is too big. The lines are too long. You can do things like hubby and I take the 2 littles in the morning, the older kids go with their parents and we meet up for lunch. That works. I don't mind doing that. But it isn't possible to get to the park and say to each other - you take the girls on Dumbo and we will take the boys on Space Mountain and then we can meet up; then DS will take the 7 year old on Tron while his wife takes the 3 and 6 year old on Snow White's Mine Train and I take the 1.5 year old on Little Mermaid. Then we all meet up and split up differently. Doesn't that sound like a massive headache where we spend half the day waiting for each other and riding a total of 6 rides all day?? I was brought up (and I thought I brought my kids up) that these are attractions, not rides, and we ride them together. Obviously except for the rides the littles aren't tall enough to go on.

How can I stop this from happening?!?! I'm afraid that even if we talk in advance about it, they will still start doing this once we are at the park. I really, really don't want to spend all of my days like this! We are going in January, but January 2026 is a lot more crowded than January 2003 was.

Thank you in advance.
 
I'm not trying to tell my son and his wife how to do Disney with their family.
With all due respect you are indeed doing the above. See your below comment
he said that they just want all 4 of their kids to be happy. I said that being happy doesn't mean only going on the rides that they want to go on, and they should be learning how to have fun doing what others want. I said Disney should be a family trip.

It sounds like to me you have a specific expectation of what you want group trips to be, your adult children honestly seem quite apologetic when things don't go the way you want, i.e. being immediately there in person when you message them even getting you some wine, answering back to you (have you thought about lack of cell phone signal which happens in queues especially never mind the actual ride) and they honestly seem like they are being more accommodating than you.

I almost wonder if you've presented yourself as someone who is readily and able to watch the kids when need be, as many grandparents often do when going on multi-generational trips, but not realized what that might end up being.

My full and complete honest advice is I don't think these amusement/theme park trips are meant for you and your family together. That may sound harsh but you've given it several shots and each time you find the same issues

1) you have trouble with dealing with the grandkids (understandable)
2) you have trouble getting in communication with your adult children
3) you resent the feeling of you're just chasing messages the whole day
4) you have a certain expectation that the trip means something that already one of your adult children has said is different than yours
5) you disapprove of how they are allowing their kids to experience their trip.
6) You couldn't even be truly happy it seems that milestone where all the grandkids could all actually ride something now, instead you got upset that you didn't get to see xyz

I think you need to step back and not do the trips but offer something much smaller and more easily manageable. Perhaps you could all select a place where the enjoyment the kids are having are more visible to you but you also need to really take stock in what trips mean to you and what trips mean to them. I sympathize with you wanting to actually see the joy and spend time physically together but feel there are better options out there for that and more awareness on your part might help out :flower3:
 
WDW has so many family friendly rides, shows and attractions that I think with a good plan and maybe some LLMP/LLSPs, you could ALL have a good time. I do think at local amusement parks this could be harder as there really seems to be a separation between babyish attractions vs older kid attractions.

Maybe have a family planning meeting and choose LLMPs that you can all do together in the morning and then split up for a bit before coming back together for dining. That way everyone gets what they want. But if it doesn't work out, it may be time to stop the "family vacations'" sadly.
 
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This is a rather long explanation and question. I apologize. I just don't know what to do! Some background first...

I went to Disney as a kid with my grandparents and parents. Took my kids with their grandparents. Went with my adult kids and their spouses, and sometimes their grandparents. Went their with college age kids and their friends. And now I am in this very strange situation and I am honestly at a loss at what to do.

I (F60) and DH (70) went to Disneyland with our DD(36) and her husband (44), our DS(35) and his wife (35), and our grandchildren (7, 6, 3, 1.5) last year and had a wonderful time. At times my hubby and I would take the 2 little ones on some rides while everyone else rode things that the littles couldn't. Worked out well. There was one incident where I was with the 2 littles while everyone else was somewhere else and they ended up taking much longer than expected, I was texting everyone asking for help (the littles were not having it at this point) and no one could get to me to help. They all felt terrible, apologized profusely, my daughter-in-law ran and bought me a glass of wine, and it never happened again.

That reminded me of the year before that when we were all at Disney World, when one grandson (age 4 at the time) didn't want to ride Pirates, so my daughter-in-law took him on a different ride. We all had difficulty meeting up afterwards. I said to my son - hey let's not do that again. And it didn't happen again so I ended up forgetting about it.

Yesterday, we all went to a local amusement park. It was kind of a big deal because the 7 year old was able to ride something he wasn't able to ride the year before. The 6 year old was able to ride something he wasn't able to the year before, the 3 year old was able to ride something she wasn't able to the year before, and the 1.5 year old was going to ride rides for the first time. We were all looking forward to the trip. Hubby and I were going to be spending time with the 2 littles on the kiddie rides while DS/wife were on the bigger rides with the boys, with DD/hubby going with them. Everything started off great. Maybe an hour after we were there, DS joins us with the 6 year old. He wanted to ride the kiddie rides. OK. DS realizes he missed seeing the 1.5 on her rides for the first time, so now we are repeating all of the rides that he missed, instead of taking the kids on ones that they didn't ride yet. OK. Whatever. If the kids are happy, I'm happy. Then DD meets up with us. (we are in a group text chat asking where everyone is in order to meet up). Then everyone is together. Now the group splits up differently and they go in different directions. The rest of the day consists of the group chat with this constant - where is everyone - and trying to meet up. I never saw my 7 year old grandson ride anything. I missed seeing the 3 year old riding the log flume for the first time. At one point my hubby and I sat down and ate fries together, having no idea where anyone else was and wondering why we came in the first place.

While sitting there, we talked about what was going to happen on our Disney World trip this upcoming January. We are all going together again. Disney World is huge and very spread out! I do not want to spend the entire day on my phone with this group chat - where are you - all day long! I tried to talk to my son about it last night and he said that they just want all 4 of their kids to be happy. I said that being happy doesn't mean only going on the rides that they want to go on, and they should be learning how to have fun doing what others want. I said Disney should be a family trip.

I'm not trying to tell my son and his wife how to do Disney with their family. I do understand that it's their decision. But I'm now aware that all of us seem to have very different expectations of what this Disney trip is going to be like, and I really have no idea how to go there with everyone on the same page. How do I start the discussion so that I don't sound like I'm saying everyone has to do the trip my way? I don't want to sound like that, because I don't mean it like that. But, I also don't want to spend the entire day missing out on experiencing the park with my family. I don't want to be the "hub" that everyone keeps splitting off from and having this group chat all day long trying to meet back up. That doesn't work at Disney. The park is too big. The lines are too long. You can do things like hubby and I take the 2 littles in the morning, the older kids go with their parents and we meet up for lunch. That works. I don't mind doing that. But it isn't possible to get to the park and say to each other - you take the girls on Dumbo and we will take the boys on Space Mountain and then we can meet up; then DS will take the 7 year old on Tron while his wife takes the 3 and 6 year old on Snow White's Mine Train and I take the 1.5 year old on Little Mermaid. Then we all meet up and split up differently. Doesn't that sound like a massive headache where we spend half the day waiting for each other and riding a total of 6 rides all day?? I was brought up (and I thought I brought my kids up) that these are attractions, not rides, and we ride them together. Obviously except for the rides the littles aren't tall enough to go on.

How can I stop this from happening?!?! I'm afraid that even if we talk in advance about it, they will still start doing this once we are at the park. I really, really don't want to spend all of my days like this! We are going in January, but January 2026 is a lot more crowded than January 2003 was.

Thank you in advance.
Every trip with extended family and children of various ages will be different.
I really just think you need to be flexible and go with the flow. Don’t overthink it or try to dictate the way you think it should be.

Let them do their own thing while you and your husband go off and do fun things that you like to do. :)

It sounds like more of a headache to try and travel as a group and do everything together. I’d maybe just make a few dining reservations and meet up daily for dinner or lunch.
 

I really appreciate your comments and observations. I have read your reply once, but I need to read it several times and really think about what you have said here. You have given some good advice and I need to truly process it. My adult daughter and her husband (who have no children) were also annoyed at the experiences that I described above, so perhaps I didn't quite explain them accurately. But your words about examining my expectations vs theirs really does deserve a lot of thought on my part. I'm very glad that I posted here, because having strangers tell me that I need to rethink things is important. One tends to assume that one is in the right, but that doesn't mean that they are, so thank you.
 
What we’ve done has been guided somewhat by the fact that we could book 3 and only 3 attractions in advance via the FP or LL system. After consulting with everyone to determine what their most important things were to do, we booked 3 in each park as well as one table service meal a day, our treat. Other than that, they were on their own. If we happened to meet up or to decide to book the same attraction later, we considered it serendipity. However, I’ll admit we haven’t had that many young children at one time - if we had, I think the older ones would have been riding with the younger ones and their parents; I doubt we’d have been splitting up as much as you seem to have done.
 
I almost wonder if you've presented yourself as someone who is readily and able to watch the kids when need be, as many grandparents often do when going on multi-generational trips, but not realized what that might end up being.

Yes. I think that my husband and I have done this, failing to take into consideration our own wants/needs. Being the stationary babysitter at the Great Wolf Lodge (for example) for 1 day is not the same thing as let me spend several thousand dollars to go to Disney and just watch kids in the park without participating in anything. We do watch our grandchildren full time while their parents work, Mon to Fri. Even all day in the summer. When we have taken the kids to the amusement park (without their parents) we have had a good time and been able to balance the rides with the different ages of the kids.
 
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My adult daughter and her husband (who have no children) were also annoyed at the experiences that I described above,
Your daughter and her husband are adults without children who can freely come and go and just on the fly do things. The son with his family have different needs and different goals. But a caution thing to me is don't use that your daughter and her husband felt the same to mean your son and his wife were wrong for how they did the trips.

My husband and I don't have kids, my sister-in-law and her now fiance don't have kids but are planning to start trying just after they get married, my other (and youngest) sister-in-law has two step children. How the youngest sister-in-law approaches get togethers and small trips is different because she has these children to account for.

Yes. I think that my husband and I have done this, failing to take into consideration our own wants/needs. Being the stationary babysitter at the Great Wolf Lodge (for example) for 1 day is not the same thing as let me spend several thousand dollars to go to Disney and just watch kids in the park without participating in anything. We do watch our grandchildren full time while their parents work, Mon to Fri. Even all day in the summer. When we have taken the kids to the amusement park (without their parents) we have had a good time and been able to balance the rides with the different ages of the kids.
Yeah it probably does feel very differently. And not every grandparent has the same problem with just being there watching their kids but it's okay if you want more I would just choose a different place to do that given all that you've said.

FWIW when you've taken your grandkids to the park without their parents they've looked to you as the authority figure and thus probably explored it the way you wanted to, you're the adults there the only adults and so you got the kids to yourself because it was actually your full responsibility at that point. With their parents with them it is their responsibility and they are the leaders in how their kids experience the trip same as you were the leader when it was just you and the grandkids; maybe that's why you're feeling so strongly about it because you're more used to watching the kids and doing things your way that now when their parents step in it doesn't work with how you've been doing it.
 
Every trip with extended family and children of various ages will be different.
I really just think you need to be flexible and go with the flow. Don’t overthink it or try to dictate the way you think it should be.

Let them do their own thing while you and your husband go off and do fun things that you like to do. :)

It sounds like more of a headache to try and travel as a group and do everything together. I’d maybe just make a few dining reservations and meet up daily for dinner or lunch.
Yes, this! We travel to Disney with our 5 kids and their spouses/SOs every other year. One son and his wife have 2 children (currently ages 3 & 8) and they are the only grandchildren. What works for our family is to plan a few hours for 5 of the days (out of 7) that we will be together (i.e. doing rope drop and riding rides together for a few hours; having lunch together and maybe doing a few rides; meeting up for a few rides and then a fireworks show in the evening; etc.). The rest of the time, every one is on their own. Now, it usually ends up that smaller groups of family members will end up doing things together throughout the week, but DH & I are often off doing the things that *we* want to do. There are usually one or two times during the week that he and I will take the 2 grandchildren on some rides while the 5 kids and spouses/SOs go on a thrill ride or two. But we are not on vacation to be the babysitters. And since the grandchildren are not *my* children; I do not get involved in determining what rides they're going on and I don't need to be with them to experience their "first time" on any particular ride. That's a moment for their parents to share with them. If I happen to be there, fine. If not, no big deal. We've done the "plan a few hours together" method on 3 trips now and it works beautifully for our family. It allows us all to have our own vacations while also spending time with each other as a full family. I might feel differently if I didn't live near my kids and see my grandkids on a regular basis, but we all see each other frequently; so being at Disney is just us being together in a place other than one of our houses. :)
 
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In short ~ vacations like this (expensive) are for everyone and you have every right to feel the way you do. You are not there to be their nanny, you are there to enjoy your time as well, which includes enjoying things with them. I have traveled with multi generational and extended family, and without a plan of expectations, there can be hurt feelings, disappointment and sometimes a bit of chaos. We've experienced it all.

Rest is not short ~

Every group trip is impacted by kids' ages, where you are staying (and hence transportation), ADRs booked and which LLs you book.

When we have been booked in different rooms or hotels and each have transportation, we opt to meet mid morning in a park. This takes off the early morning pressure, some sleep / some rope drop, each do breakfast on their own. We normally book a lunch ADR so that evenings are flexible and those who need early bed time can leave.

In 2021 we went with our adult family including SIL. We stayed offsite in a villa so we def traveled together and being all adults we stayed together. Next year same group plus two grands are going 2.5 years old and 14 months old. We will have multiple cars and be flexible on park time. When together our goal is do as many attractions together that we can. On times where adults want to the few big rides, us regulars will occupy kids for a short time.

We have already discussed that there will likely be splitting up but the parents will be with their kids and the childless adults will be free to go have adult fun. On some days the parents will stay at lodging for naps or swims, while other adults will be free to do what they would like. Our goal is a solid meal together each day, we plan a Character Meal and then I'll book a couple other ADR, then remainder will be day of decisions. At no point is anyone expecting us to stay together the whole time but the parents understand that other than a short span of time (like they ride Tron while a couple of us take kids to Dumbo) they will be enjoying the park with their kids. We will not be responsible for them for extended periods of time while the parents are off somewhere.

In your situation with two age groups of kids, my expectation is the parents split up by age groups. The 7 and 6 year old would be in the same category with the 3 and 1.5 year old in same category. And most rides at Disney they would all be in the same category. If there is a more thrill that the 7 year old wants let a parent take them while the other parent takes the other three on another ride. And maybe Grands go with the parent with the three and the son/DIL go with the one on the thrill ride. It makes more sense for more people to go to enjoy less rides and make reconnecting easier. AND there is nothing wrong with the parents/grands to go off, the grandparents to go off and son/DIL to go off for some fun on their own.

The younger two are at ages that they will be a handful and exhausting at WDW. This is not home, not a local amusement park. It is full of tens of thousands of strangers. For sure make it clear you will not be nannying this trip (it's vacation), you would like to help them and be part of the family fun. Disney is too big and too crowded to be spreading folks everywhere with that many young children split up and away from their parents. Yes, your DS wants his kids happy, but it should not be at your expense. They will absolutely have a great time if there is a simple plan in place.
 
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The younger two are at ages that they will be a handful and exhausting at WDW. This is not home, not a local amusement park. It is full of tens of thousands of strangers. For sure make it clear you will not be nannying this trip (it's vacation), you would like to help them and be part of the family fun. Disney is too big and too crowded to be spreading folks everywhere with that many young children split up and away from their parents. Yes, your DS wants his kids happy, but it should not be at your expense. They will absolutely have a great time if their is a simple plan in place.
To the underlined I don't disagree with much that've you've said but I wanted to point that the OP had all the same stuff and expectations at WDW as they did their local amusement park that they went to yesterday.

We usually can say the things you did where we're talking about expenses, crowds and size but in this case that really isn't the issue. This comes a lot down in truth to what the OP thinks a trip should be. They've changed the environment TO the local amusement park and still the OP got upset on how the outing when.

I get the impression that they watch the kids enough that now they feel they are owed (right or wrong) the experiences they get when the parents aren't around. I have seen this issue come up so often when the grandparents take on the babysitting roles in a primary duty in day to day life. Suddenly it's a crossing of the caretaking roles that bleeds out to other parts of their life. So while we can say the OP and her husband aren't there to be the nannies the truth is they HAVE been the babysitters for a long time and right or wrong feel their is a way to do things and a way not to do things.

IMO they need to find a destination where there isn't as much breaks in age related activities. A beach resort vacation for instance where they can plop down in a chair and relax watching their grandkids play on the beach or in the pool. The adult couple without children can do the same or do more adult activities. The OP wants that time with their grandkids so find a place where it's not as much of a barrier to do so. Otherwise the onus is on the OP to change how they view vacations.
 
This seems complex and more so because you guys are making it complex.

Everyone should be on the same page about what attractions everyone wants to do instead of going all Willy Nilly about it.

On attractions EVERYONE wants to ride then EVERYONE should be riding it.

Do all the TOGETHER attractions first.

THEN split off and then meet back up for meals.

But even when you split up again it should be like ok the 7yr old and the parents go on Space and Tron while the grandparents take the younger ones on something or just wait for the other group.

When we had a multi generation go several years in a row my mom who doesn't like thrill rides would sit with the kids that were too young and they would just SIT not start wondering off to other attraction that then everyone would have to message each other to figure out where everyone went.

Kids need to learn how to be "bored" again.
 
Grandparents are not nannies.

You have to set boundaries and protect yourself. It’s the hard truth.

Seemed to me in the OP they kind of want to be nannies because they want to see the kids going on each ride instead of taking one on a ride and then having the parents take the other kid on the same ride. To me THAT is the issue. So imo I'd say go on any that all of you will go on together TOGETHER.
 
One thing I'll throw in: it's almost impossible to predict what even one individual will enjoy, and what he or she will hate. I took my stepdaughter with my wife a few years back. Stepdaughter hates thrill rides with a passion, so the first thing we took her on was Soarin', which I consider the tamest headliner ride imaginable. I expected stepdaughter to really enjoy it, but the first thing out of her mouth was "I hate you both."
 
I feel for your situation. We are taking son/dil/2 gds and dd/sil/gs in July this year. We are paying for the bulk of the trip but they are responsible for their transportation to and from our hometown. We have the free disney dinng plan and I sat with the girls and we figured out together where we wanted to eat for table service. I think you should all sit down as a family and include the adult children in on the planning. Recognize that THEY are the parents. In our family the little people are all at their best in the early morning so we plan to rope drop 5 of the 6 park days. Mid trip I rented a cabana and we have no plans that day. As a matter of fact, I think I will ask our two adult children if they want to go out on their own that evening. We are planning morning park days, serious nap/rest back at the resort until late afternoon. Maybe pool time until our dinner ADRs. Then everyone is free to do what they want in the evening. I have the GEO-82 fireworks event booked for hubby and me one night and I would like to see MK fireworks one night too, but other than that, we can stay in the room with the littles all other nights while they go out and have fun (if they choose). You didn't say if you and your hubby were footing the bill or not..... regardless, you all should feel you are a part of the vacation or at some point, they may not want to vacation with you 😞 and I think that would be a shame.

Although you raised your son (who i'm sure had the same thoughts about vacation as you do), he is married now and perhaps his wife did not have the same upbringing and thoughts about vacation. Having a family meeting will hopefully put you all on the same page with clear expectations
 
Before ANY family vacation, everyone needs to be on the same page. Is this a FAMILY vacation at x-place or a vacation at X-place WITH family? It doesn't matter if the place is WDW, a beach house or a house in the mountains or wherever.

For our multigenerational trips, it's less of a family vacation and more of a vacation in parallel, meeting up at times that make sense and separating when it works. At least on my side of the family. My husband's operates differently and my one rule was I don't run point....so I didn't run point on the last vacation and it was something of a disaster.
 
It sounds like your family enjoys traveling together. You get along and enjoy each other’s company. When something does get a bit off kilter, your family deals with it.

Looking at your post, there is really only one issue you have-how to deal with four children who don’t do the same rides at the same time. Understandably, your son and his wife could use help with this situation. So, you help. All you are asking now, is that the “splitting up to ride” situation get a bit tweaked.

Would it be possible for you to come up with several scenarios?

Example-these suggestions or mix and match them or others that you/your family think up

We all ride the same rides in the morning. If there is a ride someone can’t/doesn’t want to do, that person(s) waits by the exit for the others. Maybe this person(s) eyeballs the length of the ride and pops into a gift shop for a few minutes, grabs a snack, etc. Then, in the pm we split up and everyone does what they want.

You and your husband take two of the kids for rides in the morning, while the parents take the other two. Meet up for lunch or back at the hotel for a rest in the pm. Later in the day, -go back to the parks and, as a group, go on rides that the grown-ups want to. I can see many of these rides that everyone could do-Jungle Cruise, Safari, Carousel, etc. Again, if there are rides someone can’t/won’t do- visit a gift shop, grab a snack, but keep checking the exit of the ride that everyone else is on.

Once you have ideas that you think would work, meet as a family and discuss these or other possibilities that would work with your family. It sounds like everyone is trying to make this work.
 
We own DVC we would take our parents -mine or my wife's then just the mothers...... every year for at least 12 years stated at the age of 3 months... Anyway some part of the day we were together and some part we were not. I always looked at it as Grandparents were on vacation as well and they should do what they want..... and they did. We had dinners together or met for lunch many days if we all went on rides together we did if not.... Never expected or asked or had Parents take children. I can recall all of twice where children were alone with grandparents at Disney. On a ride together ride with whoever you choose... We did pay for a lot of the parents vacation and the least we could do as they helped us for the first few years before daycare...
This is just the way we think... Its a vacation and everyone should have intentions of being on vacation and not worrying about meeting..... 24/7. Plan a sit down lunch or dinner and let the grandkids tell you about what you missed and enjoy.... that is enjoy Disney for yourself as well.
 
Stepdaughter hates thrill rides with a passion, so the first thing we took her on was Soarin', which I consider the tamest headliner ride imaginable
I find myself even having to explain my motion sickness to people so I can sympathize with your daughter although I'm sorry she said those things and would take it as just an in the moment utterance.

For example Soarin' isn't high thrill to most but it combines:
  • Movement-upwards especially the top row that is at the highest and even for me I get that split second lurch
  • Scents-that can make someone more sensitive to them have issues
  • Sounds- it can be loud at certain points
  • Screens-can activate motion sickness
  • Heights- can make someone who is nervous about heights have an issue, your feet are also dangling and if you're not in the top row you can see people's feet which may make things worse depending on the person

Now I love Soarin' but I'm just explaining why to you it seemed tame but some things about it could come across or not.

When we were there last in 2022 we got to be with some of our DISer friends and when I suggested we go on Test Track the one husband was shocked and thought that I couldn't ride that because my motion sickness and I said oh no that's like one of my favorite rides. We all ended up riding it together and had a blast but yeah just an example of how someone might not realize someone else's limits or incorrectly assume something.
 














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