For the OP, camdensmom: Thank you - your statement was well written and offered insight to the other side of vacationing during school time. I believe you were sensitive to, and even supportive of, the families who pulled out their kids for whatever reason so it is a shame you were treated rudely by some. Too bad for them they don't understand forums like DIS are intended for information sharing which doesn't require agreeing to everything, merely being respectful of everyone's opinion and grateful to those who offer their time with good intentions.
That being said I have my own insights to add. Flame away if it makes your day:
I agree with the poster who stated their school requires them to fill out a form listing educational benefits of the planned absence before even considering approval. So it is not always parents trying to convince teachers that a Disney vacation is for educational intentions. It probably is just a built-in accountability thing so school districts justify excused absences, and rightly so, but IMHO it makes the parents look like scammers.
Funny thing is, our family typically chooses educational activities; we like to visit zoos, science museums and especially cultural events, so the one and only time we pulled my DD out (to use a free cruise credit), I didn't have to invent an excuse.
However, some of the teachers assumed we were lying and laughed off my DD's offer to create a presentation for her class (at their convenience). What a shame because they were actually studying some same things and she could have offered an interesting first-hand peer mentoring.
Your comments, (and some who agreed), regarding expectations, is the most valuable insight. Depending on how many days missed, and the abilitity of the student, parents need to be realistic about what can be made up, and prepared to see their kid's grades drop accordingly. Those in JH or high school are typically most affected since they work at a faster pace.
I struggled with this before pulling my kid out, not because it was important to me, but because it was important TO HER. I felt the vacation would be counter productive if she would stress over it too much.
My DD always makes the honor or high honor student list but has to work her butt off in math to do so, by her choice. So she worked extra hard before the cruise to bring up her percentage to an A range. Still, upon returning, after missing 8 days of school, her math grade dropped to a high C, and another class dropped to a low B; enough to miss the honors list for the first time by about 1/2 a percent.
Because we discussed this possible consequence in advance, her life did not crumble around her. The teachers commended her for the effort as did I and her year end average still fell in the High Honors range. However, she did learn it is not as easy to catch up as she thought it would be. We included her in our decision to vacation during school time this year and she has lowered her expectations for post-vacation time, as well as starting off this year with more diligence to take the pressure off herself later.
And last but not least, I agree with those who commented about teachers not having as much leeway as they used to for creative teaching and/or one-on-one attention to students who need it. Our education system has reverted back to the stone age mentality of "teaching to the test" and increasing overcrowding plus discipline issues in classes is just exacerbating the problem.
May God bless and help the teachers, parents and students who are making every effort to work together for the good of the students! I WILL apologize up front to all the teachers for any extra work created for them merely in our pursuit of family funtime. I will also let them know that my DD is responsible for adhering to any reasonable demands or restrictions that THEY decide is neccessary for a VOLUNTARY absence from school.
I really feel for the kids who have parents that point the finger of responsibility solely at the teachers because that means they aren't getting the support they need at home and are learning by example to shirk their own responsibility.
Maybe my daughter's been blessed with 98% fantastic teachers. But it's more likely that our mutual respect, mutual concern for my daughter's education, and our combined efforts to help her strive to reach her potential, is what has created the best possible learning experience with the public school system we all have to work with.
Thanks again to camdensmom for the insight & "sample letter" and to those who had constructive insight to offer.