Advice for a newly Widowed Dad??

[3gr8boys]

I expect you will find some much needed joyful moments at WDW....I can't imagine what your family is going through but am confident you will be glad you went through with the trip.

I agree that character meals will be a fabulous source of fun for the little ones. I will also echo the idea that you should seek out the play areas ..... follow your children's leads as they explore the magic.

When my boys were little, I made sure to have a collection of quiet toys....new Books, etch-a-sketch, lacing shapes and such.... for plane rides. Of course that was before we could carry movie libraries in our pockets! And,yes, there are comfy headphones sized for kids available. Get an audio splitter so two or three kids can listen to one device at the same time.

I hope there is plenty of pixie dust waiting for your group!

 

[Twilight Sparkle]

So very, very sorry for your loss. I'm glad you're following your wife's wishes and keeping the trip. It sounds like you married a wise woman.

Most of the advice that I would offer has been mentioned already, but I did want to offer a suggestion if you do consider adding the dessert party. If you do, I would choose either Happily Ever After Plaza Garden Viewing or Frozen Ever After at Epcot. Both of these parties offer seating while you eat. The garden viewing section for HEA is supposed to be the better view and would provide your girls with space to stretch their legs while watching the fireworks. The Frozen party has seating during the fireworks as long as the weather allows the food part of the party to be outdoors, and you get to ride the Frozen ride after the fireworks. As much as I love the Star Wars dessert party, it would not be my choice with 3 kids under 3. There is no seating and the tables that you stand at are at adult height.

I would also make sure I had tons of wet wipes and snack bags of cheerios in the diaper bag. Those were two of my best friends when my daughter was that age. If you take lovies into the park, it would be a good idea to have identical back ups if at all possible just in case they get lost. Stay away from Princess Fairy Tale Hall without a FP. I would go to Akershus, Bon Voyage Breakfast, 1900 Park Fare, or Cinderella's Royal Table before I would do standby for the princesses with girls that young. A supposed 20 minute wait turned into nearly 2 hours for us. Someone upthread suggested dining at Crystal Palace. I agree. Pooh and gang would be perfect for that age and the food is very kid friendly. Finally, please take the girls to Enchanted Tales with Belle. They can be part of the show and would get to take photos with Belle. The last time we went, the Belle we had was wonderful with the tiny little girls. It was precious to watch.

Best wishes for a wonderful trip. You're doing a good thing.

P.S. AKL is fantastic!!! It's our favorite place to stay. I hope your girls fall in love with it, too.

 

[notrub98]

I am so sorry for your loss. How incredibly tragic. A friend of mine became a single Dad when his kids were similar ages due to his wife’s passing and I send you lots of love.

As for advice, I would recommend you really try not to “overdo it” with the kids ages. They may not be able to stay up for Fantasmic and fireworks and that’s ok. Follow their lead on what they can handle. I would strongly recommend half days at the parks, naps, down time. You will have fun - Disney is good like that - and your kids are going to realize when they are older how amazing their Dad is for taking them during this horrible time. I agree with your wife - go and get some Disney Magic.

 

[zeferjen]

I am so sorry for your loss. My advice would be to know in advance which rides you can take two kids at a time and which you need to take only one kid at a time. And set expectations before you get on each ride of who is riding with Daddy. That will help avoid meltdowns right as you board a ride or in line.

 

[Dakota731]

May God bless you and your lovely family. I’m saying a prayer now that it’s a lovely trip for all.

 

[AJT607]

I am so sorry for your loss. I hope that you and your family have a magical trip and that you will be able to cherish all of your memories from WDW over the years. Two years ago, I lost my mother suddenly and unexpectedly after a car accident. I empathize with your loss and understand that no one knows what your loss feels like right now. My wife and I planned our honeymoon for June of 2016 and Disney turned out to be an amazing escape from my grief. Two years later, there are still times when I feel suddenly overwhelmed by grief or sadness, but being able to look forward to our next Disney trip helps me through it. We had an amazing time on that honeymoon in 2016 and purchased annual passes for the first time earlier this year. In total, we will have spent about 27 days at WDW by the time our APs expire next April. Enjoy your trip and know that many of us DISers are wishing that your family gets sprinkled with tons of pixie dust on your upcoming trip.

 

[disneyworldsk]

Yes, I remember bringing their sippie cups if they are old enough to use them and bottles. and a stroller covering if it rains you don't want the stroller getting wet and sunscreen when their legs are sticking out of the stroller in the sun.

 

[dprincessmom]

I am a recently single dad. My wife passed away a few weeks ago from an unexpected surgical complication. She was the love of my life for 20 years and we were married for 11 years. High school sweethearts and i am 34 now with twin two year olds and an adopted daughter who we adopted prior to getting pregnant who is 6 months older than the twins. She made me promise I would never cancel the trip no matter what happened so we are going to Disney the week before Thanksgiving and I am terrified. I would love any advice possible. My sister is going with us as well as her father who is Poppy to the kids. I am grieving but I now we need this trip for some Disney magic in this dark time. Thanks for everyone's support and I would appreciate any advice. We have a few ADRs and a made a few fastpasses before the surgery. I dont know about dessert parties due to the kids ages and they love everything Disney. Thanks for advice and I am so thankful for this forum of people who love the magic of Disney as much as my family.

First of all - I am so sorry for your family. I lost my husband last December. We were scheduled to go with a youth group 3 weeks later and I am glad we did. It was a different trip but being in our happy place gave us a chance to breathe for the first time in a while.

Take it slow while you are there and let the kids dictate the pace. Hit things you all can manage and just do what feels right. Make certain to take rest breaks, not just for the kids but also yourself.

 

[Cody Beight]

Thanks for the outpouring of support.
I have become a DIS junkie and watch their youtube videos daily and use the forums.
It drove my wife a little crazy but she loved it
After a while, you feel like the DIS folks and the forum members are like friends.
I really do love the people here.
Thanks again and i cant wait to feel that magic pixie dust!

 

[fla4fun]

So sorry for your loss. WDW is my go to place for grieving. I go there not only to remember the past, but to remember there will eventually be a light at the end of the tunnel. Sometimes when you’re in the middle of the storm it’s easy to forget that it’s ok to have fun, and it’s ok to be sad wherever you are, and even under what people call “normal” circumstances it’s often a mix of both at WDW. In a place where just the background music can make people emotional, no one is going to give you odd looks if you tear up at Disney. It’s like the perfect cover.

Go at your own pace. Don’t feel like you have to do everything or that you have to have a perfect trip. Do make FastPass reservations but don’t be afraid to change them around on the fly. If you like to eat on the fly too then you may want to do fewer ADRs and more QS. QS can make your day more flexible so you can change your plans or even leave a park without worrying about the penalties. With the new advance ordering, you can arrange to get your QS meals with little to no wait, something that comes in handy when you’re corralling toddlers. There isn’t a right way or a wrong way to do Disney. Do what works best for you in the moment. Some of my best trips are the ones where I step back from the more detailed schedule and just allow the magic to unfold around me.

I hope you and your family have a great trip!

 

[kj2mom]

I have been following this for the last week or so but kept quiet because I couldn't really add anything in addition to the others but I just reread the thread because I wanted to remember when you are going so I could keep you in my thoughts and watch for updates. First, I am soo sorry for your loss! I hope you have a fantastic trip!

When rereading your initial post just now I noticed you put the word terrified and it made me think of something that may help. I am a single mom of twins since they were 2. I am not saying that to compare to your situation, yours is totally different and my heart breaks for all of you. I say that because when my children were young (they just turned 16 last month) one of the pieces of advice I took to heart was the whole 'never let them see you sweat' cliche. If I was terrified about something I had to keep it in check because they could feel it and sense it and their behavior reflected that. I hope all of the advice people have given you will help you overcome the feeling of terror. After all my years of Disney I think the things that make people's trips not the greatest are expectations. People can often times set their expectations pretty high and if everything isn't met they are disappointed which leaves a bad taste in their mouth after the trip. Because of this I expect nothing during our trips, when the children were young I let them control pretty much everything. At that age the trip plan was whatever they wanted to do at any particular time. Happy children = happy parent at that age. Now, as they have gotten older I took more of the reigns and we compromised more about what we planned to do but at that young of an age the only way I would be happy would be when they were loving it too. I hope you are able to overcome the terror, relax, go with the flow and enjoy this much needed trip with your children and family! If you are calm and relaxed chances are they will be too which will make everything that much easier during your trip!

I can't wait to hear all about your trip!

 

[MIAMouseketeer]

I am a recently single dad. My wife passed away a few weeks ago from an unexpected surgical complication. She was the love of my life for 20 years and we were married for 11 years. High school sweethearts and i am 34 now with twin two year olds and an adopted daughter who we adopted prior to getting pregnant who is 6 months older than the twins. She made me promise I would never cancel the trip no matter what happened so we are going to Disney the week before Thanksgiving and I am terrified. I would love any advice possible. My sister is going with us as well as her father who is Poppy to the kids. I am grieving but I now we need this trip for some Disney magic in this dark time. Thanks for everyone's support and I would appreciate any advice. We have a few ADRs and a made a few fastpasses before the surgery. I dont know about dessert parties due to the kids ages and they love everything Disney. Thanks for advice and I am so thankful for this forum of people who love the magic of Disney as much as my family.

First off, my sincere condolences. I can't imagine what took her life so quickly and unexpectedly, but it is a lesson to us all that life is precious.

I think others have got you covered on rides, etc. One suggestion I have is to get Celebrating buttons and write your wife's name (the kids can write "my mom"). That can be a little piece of her that they carry with them throughout the trip. Just an idea. I will be praying for you and your family.

 

[wdwlver]

A lot of people have given you good advice. I just wanted to add how sorry I am for such an unimaginable loss. You have my deepest sympathy and hopes for a wonderful healing trip for all of you.

 

[fely1st]

I am really sorry for your loss, I can't give any tipps since I have no childs but I wanted to wish you happy moments and some pixie dust. Your childs can be prood of their dad.

 

[revdon64]

There's no way I can truly understand your grief. You have my prayers.

The best advice I can offer is go at your pace. Take time to let your little ones soak up the sights and sounds and smells and flavors of it all. Take breaks from the parks when you need to. Don't push them to the point of breaking because their meltdowns will become your meltdown too. Go with the flow and enjoy the time together. Maybe try to create a mommy memory by leaving a single flower at the partners statue with your kids?

 

[Dbktmc]

I am so sorry for your loss. I can't even imagine what you are going through right now.

I have been trying to think back to my son's first trip to WDW when he turned 2. Some of the things that we thought were invaluable to us were sunscreen, bathing suits, wet wipes, children's Tylenol (and syringes), sippy cups, and tons of kid friendly snacks in the park. In the diaper bag we always took a change of clothes. Even if he didn't have an accident it was great to get him into dry clothes after he inevitably played in water areas of the parks. One last thing that was great for us was having some little toys in the room that he could play with. After being in the parks all day he was sometimes overstimulated and just needed some quiet time in our room to play.

Good luck to all of you. I hope that you have a great time!

 

[jcorco00]

Very sorry for your loss. I have three school age kids and I know the trip would be hard even at their age. I admire your courage to go, and i'm sure you will have trip full of emotions. I almost lost my wife in July and Disney trips were one of the things I have looked back on and wondered if I could do it alone. After thinking about it for some time I know that we would go also. Have a great time and make some good memories. Whoo Pig!