Adrian Peterson

[Lisa loves Pooh]

A lot of women in abusive relationships don't believe they're being abused. "I shouldn't have made him mad. He doesn't really mean it. He loves me. It's just sometimes..." They make every excuse in the book. But they ARE abused. The marks on their bodies tell you that.

Just because you don't think you were abused as a child, doesn't mean it didn't happen. "Mom loved us. This was just her way. We all knew what the belt meant and it was okay." Nope, still abuse. Whether you want to call it that or not, that's what it was.

Call me judgmental if you want, but there is NEVER, EVER a reason to hit a child with a belt, a switch, a garden hose, or anything else. All you're teaching your child is the way to solve a problem is with violence. "Don't like what someone else did, hit them. Didn't get your way, get the belt. People will listen to you if you hit them enough." This is the lesson that comes across, whether it's meant that way or not.

Simply spanking a child is not abuse. No amount of hyperbole and drama from the don't do it crowd will change that.

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

And when the baby continued to get the cat?

Or are you suggesting that you would keep the cat or the baby locked away so they wouldn't cross paths?

I'm curious how they get the cat to obey.

 

[kidshop]

And when the baby continued to get the cat?

Or are you suggesting that you would keep the cat or the baby locked away so they wouldn't cross paths?

Yes, the baby woudl not have access to the cat. . Seems clear to me. Better than getting mad at a baby who can't understand the fuss.

The cat has greater cognitive ability than the 15 month old! Babies can really hurt animals unintentionally.

 

[kimblebee]

Simply spanking a child is not abuse. No amount of hyperbole and drama from the don't do it crowd will change that.

Exactly. I was spanked and so was my daughter. We are not violent people. It was used, when needed, as a discipline tool and that's all.

The two sides are never going to agree on this.

 

[mom2AidanAndEli]

Simply spanking a child is not abuse. No amount of hyperbole and drama from the don't do it crowd will change that.

Whipping with a switch, hitting with a belt or garden hose is not spanking and no amount of downplaying it from the all-for-it crowd will change that.

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

As a parent, you should not have allowed him to carry the cat around. I think so many of these issues can be taught with “active parenting”.

Kids fighting over video games? Time to shut down the game, and go outside with your kids and toss a ball.

Have a biting baby that enjoys biting stuffed animals? He should not be allowed to carry around a cat.

I could not even begin to imagine hitting a 15 month old child Do you allow the daycare workers to hit your baby since it works so well?

It seems from this thread that segregation, isolation, and alienation of affection are better suited forms of abuse than spanking.

Oh--no? Well what exactly do you think a time out is if not any of those things? Because no matter how you define it, it easily meets a definition to abuse.

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

Yes, the baby woudl not have access to the cat. . Seems clear to me. Better than getting mad at a baby who can't understand the fuss.

The cat has greater cognitive ability than the 15 month old! Babies can really hurt animals unintentionally.

Yes, the cat does. How pray tell do you propose to keep the cat away from the baby?

And No, locking then into one room for the months it will take before baby understands to not harm the cat is animal abuse.

 

[kidshop]

It seems from this thread that segregation, isolation, and alienation of affection are better suited forms of abuse than spanking.

Oh--no? Well what exactly do you think a time out is if not any of those things? Because no matter how you define it, it easily meets a definition to abuse.

Huh?

Sorry, you lost me.

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

Whipping with a switch, hitting with a belt or garden hose is not spanking and no amount of downplaying it from the all-for-it crowd will change that.

Is a hand not something else?


But you are okay with segregation, isolation, alienation of affection, and emotional abuse that a time out provides?

Hyperbole works both ways

 

[kidshop]

Yes, the cat does. How pray tell do you propose to keep the cat away from the baby?

And No, locking then into one room for the months it will take before baby understands to not harm the cat is animal abuse.

So you are saying hitting the baby is the only solution that will work to keep him from biting the cat?

I guess the parent has to constantly supervise if they are together. I had never had biters or a cat, so maybe I'm not qualified. But I still wouldn't spank.


Keeping a cat in another room from a biting baby is animal abuse?

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

Huh?

Sorry, you lost me.

Time outs are emotionally abusive. I just described how they would be. Emotional abuse is still abuse. But yet, that is perfectly acceptable.


See how ridiculous hyperbole makes something sound?


And no, I don't condone AP. But the ridiculous assertion that an ordinary spanking that leaves no mark is barbaric and abusive because some parents think they have it all figured out. Their time outs are just as abusive if we are going to go there. Especially if your kid cried. Mean abusive parents.

And comparing a child who had spa kings growing up with a battered partner is asinine. But hyperbole is an effective coercion tool for change.

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

So you are saying hitting the baby is the only solution that will work to keep him from biting the cat?

I guess the parent has to constantly supervise if they are together. I had never had biters or a cat, so maybe I'm not qualified. But I still wouldn't spank

Keeping a cat in another room from a biting baby is animal abuse?

No I do not condone spanking a baby. But that is me personally. Not going to play bash the poster to make myself feel morally superior though.

And yes, isolating a pet could be spun as abusive.

Barring age or medical issue, all the cats I have ever owned would avoid the baby after the first attempt

 

[mom2AidanAndEli]

Is a hand not something else?


But you are okay with segregation, isolation, alienation of affection, and emotional abuse that a time out provides?

Hyperbole works both ways

Yep, if telling my child to sit on his bed for five minutes while he calms down, gathers himself, and thinks about what he could have done better makes me abusive, then so be it.

 

[Mickeyluver37]

Simply spanking a child is not abuse. No amount of hyperbole and drama from the don't do it crowd will change that.

Perhaps, but things are definitely changing. Many of us are breaking the cycle as we become parents, and the pro-spanking rates continue to decline. While 19 states is still too many, the states are one by one abolishing corporal punishment in schools. Many of us feel so passionately about it that if we can change one person's mind, we know we're making progress.

 

[Colleen27]

There shouldn't be bleach around to drink, the sockets should have covers in them, and around traffic the child should be restrained in a stroller or by the hand. Then there is no reason to spank for this. This is exactly what I did.

That last one is the only time I ever spanked my son... because I had him by the hand and he jerked away to run ahead into the street. You know what? I never had to do it again and I truly don't believe a time-out would have made the same impression. Because spanking wasn't a "tool" that got regular use it made a strong impression about the danger and seriousness of what he did and reached him in a way that our prior lessons about traffic safety didn't. Now, if I spanked every time he threw a toy, played too rough with the dog, or otherwise acted up in normal kid ways that tool wouldn't have been effective - it would have meant nothing more than a time out or a talking-to, just everyday normal discipline. It was effective specifically because it wasn't everyday, normal discipline.

As far as "this is exactly what I did"... Every child is different and what works for one may be useless for another. If there was one right answer to every parenting and discipline issue they'd come with instruction manuals and we'd all be perfect parents.

 

[Fortune Cookie]

He got three licks. Didn't go back to the principal's office for a very very long time.

While I think it is wrong to hit your own child, I think it is beyond creepy that a grown man would want to paddle my son's buttocks.

Doesn't that give you the creeps? What kind of man would actually call a little (or big) boy or girl into his office and spank their bottom?

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

Perhaps, but things are definitely changing. Many of us are breaking the cycle as we become parents, and the pro-spanking rates continue to decline. While 19 states is still too many, the states are one by one abolishing corporal punishment in schools. Many of us feel so passionately about it that if we can change one person's mind, we know we're making progress.

Having a preference to not use it and it being abusive are two different things.

In many ways parents are making progress.
And in many others they are not judging by the increased population of snowflakes. And no, not spanking does not create a snowflake. But being too soft of a parent might.

We are seriously going backwards with how some do our "well behaved" youth population interact with the world these days.

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

While I think it is wrong to hit your own child, I think it is beyond creepy that a grown man would want to paddle my son's buttocks.

Doesn't that give you the creeps? What kind of man would actually call a little (or big) boy or girl into his office and spank their bottom?

I'm not a fan of corporal punishment in schools. I would vote against it if given the opportunity. But what I find creepy is when people make creepy innuendo that it is a pleasurable experience enjoyed by the adults who implement it. You can argue against it without the creepy imagination. Why would you go there?

 

[kidshop]

Time outs are emotionally abusive. I just described how they would be. Emotional abuse is still abuse. But yet, that is perfectly acceptable.


See how ridiculous hyperbole makes something sound?


And no, I don't condone AP. But the ridiculous assertion that an ordinary spanking that leaves no mark is barbaric and abusive because some parents think they have it all figured out. Their time outs are just as abusive if we are going to go there. Especially if your kid cried. Mean abusive parents.

And comparing a child who had spa kings growing up with a battered partner is asinine. But hyperbole is an effective coercion tool for change.

Yes spanking is not what Peterson did. And spanking with an open hand that does not leave a mark is not barbaric for our society. It is to me personally, though.

Spanking with objects is seen as abusive these days.

The focus here really should be that Peterson committed severe child abuse. It was not discipline gone too far.

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

Yes spanking is not what Peterson did. And spanking with an open hand that does not leave a mark is not barbaric for our society. It is to me personally, though.

Spanking with objects is seen as abusive these days.

The focus here really should be that Peterson committed severe child abuse. It was not discipline gone too far.

Agreed. But people have elected to extend the discussion to ANY form of physical discipline even if it is just a light swat on the behind. Hence that is what I was addressing.