ADD-12 year DD

[AtlantaSue]

Do any of you have a tween or teen girl that has been diagnosed w/ ADD? (Not ADHD)
I've been worried about my DD in school, but never considered ADD until recently. Apparently, it shows up in girls differently, and often goes undiagnosed. She exhibits many symptoms that I saw on several online "checklists." The hard part is figuring out if it is actually ADD, or typical middle school behavior!
She is very bright, but she puts very little effort into school. She often turns things in late; she procrastinates; her room is a mess; she misplaces things; she has a hard time getting up and being on time. She has many friends, but she downplays her abilities to them. SHE is the one who 1st came to me and said "I think I have ADD"-as far as being able to focus in school. But this is the 1st year she's ever said anything.
I would love to hear if any of you had a similar experience w/ your daughter(s)!!

 

[TEENEE]

My dd is 14, she is also ADD, not ADHD. She sounds very similar to your dd. When she puts her mind to it she can be on the honor roll but most of the time it's a struggle because she can get distracted so easily. She didn't have many friends until this year. Her room is a disaster unless I make her clean it daily. She can destroy her room just getting clothes out for school. As a mom it can be very frustrating. Some days she has everything together and I think maybe she is getting control then the next day it's like talking to a wall. I worry about how she will cope when she is on her own. Then she'll do something amazing and I know she'll be alright.

 

[AtlantaSue]

Yes!! They sound very similar. So she was diagnosed-did she go on any medication or change her diet? Please tell me something helped!

 

[TEENEE]

She takes adderall every day. I make sure she takes it on school days. If she misses on the weekends I can tell. It does make a world of difference in her. She is still a goofy, fun kid when she is on the meds just more focused, not such an airhead. Routine is very important in keeping her on track. I have noticed that she has matured a lot over the past year, so you have that to look forward to also. Her sense of humor has changed slightly, she takes more pride in how she looks and tries to act more mature (when she needs to). I really like the young lady she is becoming.

 

[TexasErin]

My 13-year-old DD has ADD (not ADHD). She will often get zeroes in school for not turning in her assignments. Her grades will be like 100, 95, 100, 97, 0, 98, 100, 13 (e-mail from teacher said she had plenty of time to finish the assignment.) Her room is a mess and she often loses things and forgets things.

She is on a low dose of Concerta (27 miligrams), prescribed her her pediatrician. I spoke with a child psychiatrist yesterday (when I took 7-year-old DS in to see him who was diagnosed with ADHD) and he told me that DD needs to be on a higher dosage and to let her pediatrician know this when she writes the refill.

If you have any other children, they may have ADD or ADHD, too, since it tends to run in families..........

Good luck!
Erin

 

[Mom-to-2-Princesses]

I went to a presentation at our Elementary School about ADD and ADHD which I found fascinating. The main thing I remember is kids with ADD/ADHD can be very smart and are able to "hide" their condition in Elementary School. It's when they hit Middle School and have to study more, work on projects, be more independant that it "catches" up with them.

I think if she is concerned and you are concerned that it wouldn't hurt to have her tested. Good Luck!

 

[jel0511]

My 11YO DD takes the middle dose of Concerta 36mg (I think). It does help her, but lately things seem to have slacked off. You've just described my DD perfectly. She was diagnosed in 2nd grade and we seemed to have it under control well during elementary, but the transition to middle school seemed to make it rear it's ugly head. I think she got into a good routine in elementary, so she was o.k. with the new routines, she was a mess. I'm going to see if things continue with the slacking off, if it does, I'm either going to change meds or up her dose.

 

[pyrxtc]

You all just described my DD and myself 9when I was younger) to a tee ! But .... I am a firm beleiver in not medicating a child for things like this. your DD may just be a little scatterbrained and I think that is normal at that age. She just has to learn to train her brain to get it all done. They hit an age where you don't hover over them doing all of their stuff and expect them to be able to do it and they are taking on a lot of responsibility to themselves and what they are supposed to do. My DD is very bright and often tests way above her grade levels but still fails to turn in homework and things like that. Her room is a disater (so is/was mine) andshe doesn' always pay attention to what she should be but she is a teenage girl. I wouldn't put her on meds to fix it, I am juts up her butt about ever assignment and take things away from her when she doesn't get them done and I start seeing 0's on her reports.

 

[Motherofboys]

A few thoughts on ADD, my DH has adult ADD and these things were pretty eye opening to me and I have a minor in psychology but never learned this:

It's estimated that 75% of cases of ADD or ADHD are hereditary

It's estimated that as many as 70% of children that are properly diagnosed with ADD or ADHD will not "outgrow" it and will have adult ADD

Most kids who are properly diagnosed with ADD or ADHD have a parent who has ADD or ADHD, whether it has been diagnosed or not

As demands of schooling, jobs, parenting increase -- so do the problems. Which often leads to poor performance, low self-esteem, problems relating to others, frequent outbursts, and feelings of failure. It can also lead to problems with depression and anxiety.

Unfortunately a lot of people don't get the kind of support that they need. People are quick to dismiss ADD/ADHD as "made up" or something that "everyone has a little of".

Imagine how hard that must be for those who have these problems. We don't know what it is to have a mind that cannot focus or to face the challenges that they face.

Whether you decide to medicate or not, please take the time to read about ADD and its effects -- the more you know the more you can help your child

 

[AtlantaSue]

Thank y'all for the responses; I appreciate you sharing w/ me. I, too, had heard the exact same comment about girls being able to compensate in Elem. school, but getting diagnosed in middle school; that could be very true. I also see that it could just be a matter of me helping her getting more on top of things in order to make sure things got done-as one poster said.
It's an interesting dilemma to me--I have, thus far, been a big proponent of raising kids to be independent and not getting too involved in their school work. Now, I find myself thinking that in order for her to be independent, and successful in school, she may have to go on medication--something that makes me and DH a little uncomfortable. Not saying we won't, we're just takin' a pause...
Would changing diet help in this situation, or is that more for the hyperactive part?
What is my first step in asking for testing-pediatrician?

 

[The Mystery Machine]

My 13yodd has depression/anxiety. She is on Lexapro for the depression and in counseling for learning how to manage herself.

She is also very bright and has set high goals for herself. That does not go well with anxiety.

The counselor she sees has been a HUGE help.

I have a dd who is a freshman in college and believe me, middle school is where you need to be very hands on and figure out what is going on.

Right now my dd is learning how to manage her school assignments, due dates, talking to teachers, etc....It is a comprehensive process that takes time, patience and a good therapist helps.

Whether your dd has ADD, anxiety, etc she needs to learn how to organize herself.

Medication is a small part of the help. You need the other piece.