A Funeral Attire Question (regarding color)

[** Disney Lover **]

I'm wondering, this question for my mom. Her grandmother passed away and she's always been very close to her and she has just bought a really pretty "red" suit. I thought that that particular color wouldn't exactly be very appropriate for a wake or funeral, but with this being 2002 I wasn't sure so I thought I'd come on a big place and ask that question and hope to get a very many responses.

 

[Rajah]

I personally still wouldn't wear anything but Black or Navy to a funeral. Especially if I was close to the person who passed away.

 

[Laurabearz]

There are many shades of red..... A darker shade would work, but then again since she is close family I think anything she would like to wear is fine.... Of course there maybe some who will talk about it...... "Can you believe she wore THAT?" But I know some of my relatives would have something to say about just about anything.

If she looks good, the suit is of a modest cut, I say go for it.

I am sorry for your loss........ (((((((hugs)))))))

 

[Dan Murphy]

I think most anything is appropriate, so long as it is subdued and not overtly flashy.

 

[bsnyder]

My condolences to your mom and you.

I think the days of black or navy only at a funeral are long gone. I've seen people wear every color of the rainbow and it does not look inappropriate or out of place, as long as it's an appropriately cut, conservative looking dress or pants suit, I don't think the color matters any more.

 

[gemmie214]

I am sorry for your loss.

I would never say anything about a person wearing a red suit to a funeral but I personally would not do it myself.

 

[Blondie]

I'm sorry for your loss,

Personally, I would only wear black or navy blue. I've seen dark shades of purple (plum) that looked okay too.

 

[browneyes]

Did your grandmother love the color red? If so, I'd wear it in tribute to her. Sorry about your grandmother. {{hugs}}

 

[** Disney Lover **]

Thank you for all your replies. I see it's a really mixed bag, and honestly that is what I thought I would see. I just for some reason just thought (my gut feeling), OH NO you CANNOT wear RED! But then I thought, well maybe I need to do a bit more of some research to see what is the norm these days as we've not attended anything to this nature in quite sometime.

 

[aahmom1]

Before my Mom died she used to say that she didn't want everybody wearing black to her funeral, so when the time came we didn't.

 

[tigercat]

When my son died I told everyone that I did not want any dark colours worn to the funeral. When I die again I do not want any dark colours worn. I think something nice should be worn but I hate seeing dark clothes at a funeral. I guess I just feel that it is a passage nearer to God and that should be celebrated not mourned even if in your heart you are really grieving. But that is just my view.
tigercat

 

[Steve H.]

If that's what she wants to wear, I would have a hard time arguing with a grieving person -- I'm sure it's fine.

 

[Serena]

I agree with Laura totally. I think she's related. lol

 

[TerriP]

When my father passed on we wore his favorite outfits to the funeral (his favorites on us...not his own personal favorites ) which meant my sister was in dark blue, I was in white, and my mom was in the yellow dress he gave her as a gift and LOVED on her. No one said a word about what we wore that I know of...it's no one else's place to judge.

You and your family have my condolances and sympathy...

 

[nativetxn]

When my mother's only sibling and sister lay dying from lung cancer she made my mother promise to wear a red dress to her funeral. So my mother did

 

[CamColt]

So sorry for your loss!

Im glad you posted the question though. I was wondering the same thing recently. I could possibly have a wake and funeral to go to of a family member this summer. Ive already been stressing about what to wear since most of my summer clothes are in light colors. I cant see going out and spending money on 2 new dark dresses that Ill never wear again.

 

[HusbandAlwaysWorking]

Very sorry for your loss...

My husband owns funeral homes. I can say that if the crowd at the wake/funeral is traditional, elders may comment on a bright color. I've seen attire from very casual (when a biker has passed away) to very strick (orthodox Greek, for example).

If you think the crowd is not they type to comment or take offense, wear what makes YOU comfortable (or, just do it anyway!). Traditionally, many moons ago, it was said that if someone wore red to a funeral, they were sending a message of hatred to the family. But, I doubt many are even aware of this anymore.

 

[bfeller]

When attending funerals I usually opt for black or navy. (Both parents and brother 10 years ago) However, this past September when my older brother died I wore a deep plum. This is what I am comfortable wearing to funerals. May have been the way that I was brought up (like don't wear black or white to a wedding) or it just suits my mood when I am sad. However, it is a personal decision and a person should wear what he/she is comfortable doing.

Please accept my deepest sympathy on your loss.

 

[Disney Doll]

When DFIL died, near St.Patrick's day and he was as Irish as they come, I wore green. When DMIL died, near Christmas, I wore plum. My DSIL wore a red jacket to her mother's funeral,and no one commented, as far as I know.

 

[PamOKW]

It's so hard to find nice clothes of any color. The last thing you want to do is run around trying to find something black to wear. If it's a bright, bright red, I'd wear it to the wake and try to find something less flashy for the funeral. But, if there aren't two nice outfits, go ahead and wear the red suit both places. When my dad died unexpectedly and my mom was too sick herself and had lost too much weight to fit into most of her clothes, my sister-in-law and I ran all over town trying to find a black dress for her. It was unnecessary stress and we found nothing appropriate. I had her wear a raspberry knit suit that always looked nice to the wake. The black dress to the funeral was not my first choice but I doubt anyone today could tell you what she was wearing. I also couldn't find black on short notice and wore grey to the wake and navy to the funeral.