A bit of a vent...wondering if it's just me

klitteral2009

Mouseketeer
Joined
Sep 29, 2012
Messages
429
So being a Die hard Disney nut, something gets under my skin and I wonder if I'm just a terrible person for it.

We have some friends who are CONSTANT 'one uppers'. You know the kind, ask you for your help with first trip planning and then magically decide they can do it way better and totally ignore your honest help in trying to get them to maximize their time while avoiding common stressors. Return from their trip and then know anything and everything and tell you your help was totally wrong and that the plan they had was much better.

I mean, I'm glad they had a good time, but do you really need to feel superior because of it?

Just grinds my gears. Anyone have people like this in their lives?
 
They are our friends...but this is just a part of them that gets a little tiresome. It really shouldn't have been a surprise they acted as they did though, I guess.
and you say these people are your friends?

I might be a little more choosy with throwing that word around.
 
I really don't give Disney advice. Most people don't do Disney the way I do it. On site, ADR's, FP+, etc. Most people I know drive down, stay off site, do an Orlando vacation with one day at MK and maybe another WDW park, eat off site, pack food to take into the park. Hey they have fun so I mind my business. If they ask I give my opinion but it's usually met with "you're crazy, that's too expensive."

I do have two friends a coworker that do Disney like I do and it's fun talking to them about it and giving each other advice. The two friends won't be going back for a while (one is going this month but after that they are taking a break) so we just talk about what we love. My coworker is going soon so we talk about what's new and touring ideas. I recently told her about EMM and she was really excited.
 

I really don't give Disney advice. Most people don't do Disney the way I do it. On site, ADR's, FP+, etc. Most people I know drive down, stay off site, do an Orlando vacation with one day at MK and maybe another WDW park, eat off site, pack food to take into the park. Hey they have fun so I mind my business. If they ask I give my opinion but it's usually met with "you're crazy, that's too expensive."

I do have two friends a coworker that do Disney like I do and it's fun talking to them about it and giving each other advice. The two friends won't be going back for a while (one is going this month but after that they are taking a break) so we just talk about what we love. My coworker is going soon so we talk about what's new and touring ideas. I recently told her about EMM and she was really excited.

I definately try not to give advice unless someone asks, for the reasons you said..everyone does it differently between where they stay, what they like to do etc. But she asked and was all 'I want to go and do what you guys do! You always have such a good time and the last time we went I felt like we were just running around crazy'. I spent a lot of time helping her, not that I minded but they just kill me with the 'we know better' routine. We love them, truly but sometimes its maddening. We always stay on site, with park hoppers and know where we love to eat. Everyone has opinions as far as food but she presented this as a once in a lifetime type trip so I wanted to be sure and get her the best experiences for her family. Totally wasted.

It's so fun to talk Disney with someone who knows and tours similarly. I wish I had more friends like that!

To each their own, but I just wondered if anyone had people like this or if they'd tried to help someone like that. :)
 
Yes, it would annoy me.
...but this does sound like a toxic relationship...

Some of my friends won't stay on property and won't show up until mid-morning at the earliest. My parents, who started the WDW family vacation tradition for our family, do most things at WDW the exact opposite of how I would! Less people doing it 'my way' is better for me anyway ;-)
 
Yes, it would annoy me.
...but this does sound like a toxic relationship...

Some of my friends won't stay on property and won't show up until mid-morning at the earliest. My parents, who started the WDW family vacation tradition for our family, do most things at WDW the exact opposite of how I would! Less people doing it 'my way' is better for me anyway ;-)

even the thought of mid morning arrival gives me anxiety lol
 
It's not you. That would bother me too, not because it's about WDW, but because it is rude. If it were me, I'd kindly say, "I'm glad you had a good time," then change the subject. If the friend persisted, I'd suddenly have an urgent appointment that I had to get to.
 
Sounds like they are more of the "Know it all" people than "One uppers". ..or maybe it's both, :scratchin:sad2::sad2::sad2:

For me, in situations like this it is important to be polite, but stand your ground. I would see myself saying something like... "Glad you had a great time! Yup, there are lots of ways to visit WDW. Yours wouldn't work for us, but glad it does for you!" It lets them know that they can't push their opinions on others.

People like that are tough to be around for very long though.

Dan
 
I don't give advice and expect people to take it, I give it because I think it can help them. If they choose not to use it and do things their own way then that is ok with me. I wouldn't even be bothered if they thought their way was better, because it probably was for them. My way is best for me, other's may find a way that works better for them.
I don't know these people, and maybe they are always trying to one up you, but that isn't what I'm getting from this situation. One upping you would be more like you went to WDW for a week and stayed mod, they went for 10 days and stayed deluxe.
It seems like you are annoyed because they didn't take your advice and think it was the best advice for them.
 
I don't give advice and expect people to take it, I give it because I think it can help them. If they choose not to use it and do things their own way then that is ok with me. I wouldn't even be bothered if they thought their way was better, because it probably was for them. My way is best for me, other's may find a way that works better for them.
I don't know these people, and maybe they are always trying to one up you, but that isn't what I'm getting from this situation. One upping you would be more like you went to WDW for a week and stayed mod, they went for 10 days and stayed deluxe.
It seems like you are annoyed because they didn't take your advice and think it was the best advice for them.

I would agree with you except the advice was asked for multiple times about multiple things. I definitely agree that different ways work for different people. In this case though, it was more about the way I answered the questions that we're asked and then they decided to do the exact opposite. Things like rope drop and how important it was to do IF maximizing rides and avoiding crowds was what they were after (which was paramount with them when we had the discussion) and them deciding to show up midday and complaining about wait times and all the people.

And you're right, one upper may have been the wrong term to use.
 












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