.

[softballmom3]

When my dh goes shopping with me I always end up spending double ad I tell him that lol. He says when he goes we actually have food .

 

[robsmom]

I know one thing... If I went to the store with a list from my wife and came home perfectly with everything on that list and later sat down at the computer and found a post like this, I would promptly stand up, walk out to the kitchen, open all packages I purchased, and dump them in the garbage. There you go, you go do the shopping!

And I don't believe a word of anyone who constantly claims they spend $50/week on groceries unless they don't count the 5 days of eating out that they do. I couldn't feed my family Kraft Macaroni and Cheese for breakfast, lunch, and dinner for 7 days for $50. $50 for a family of 4 would be $0.60 per person per meal. I've seen enough folks post the $50/week with even more than 4 people in the family. You're not getting a meal for 60 cents.

I enjoyed this response. I might not waste the food, per se, but I would be quite annoyed if my spouse treated me as a child and resented my family. I would not worry about being divorced for my response because I could never live this way.

 

[crisi]

Food Stamps are meant to supplement the food budgets of low-income families. The program isn't meant to provide for all of their food. For instance, there's also WIC for families with children 5 and under. For those with children over the age of 5, there are subsidized school lunch programs that sometimes also cover free breakfast on school days. And those families are expected to spend some of their own income to pay for food as well. So really, the state is not assuming that you can feed a family on $30 per person per week. They are just helping out to the tune of $30 per person per week.

You are right that its meant to be supplemental, but often it isn't. Some families have no additional income, or what little income they have needs to go to gas in the car or rent or other necessities. The folks I know on SNAP don't supplement. That's their budget.

 

[Srbright]

You are right that its meant to be supplemental, but often it isn't. Some families have no additional income, or what little income they have needs to go to gas in the car or rent or other necessities. The folks I know on SNAP don't supplement. That's their budget.

Granted, ymmv, but in Michigan, a family of 4 with no income gets $664 per month in SNAP benefits. There is no reason to supplement at that range. For that much I could get the lamb roast and the rib roast and still have money to spare.

And in Michigan they take into account your rent and transportation expenses (as well as heat/elect and internet if it is being used for job search). So if some is telling you that they have no income and can't get by on SNAP then I would be highly suspect of that either because they feel its none of your business or the stigma is too great.

Edit: Actually it isn't no income. It is the max unemployment for the state of Michigan. So, 352*4= 1408 per month, and still get $664 in SNAP benefits.

Stacy

 

[Judique]

I brace myself when my wife does the grocery shopping by herself as she comes home with a ton of junk food. Most of the time I go by myself or we go together.

Good that you know how to hold your tongue, lol!

I think going together is the fun thing to do.

Have you ever noticed how much junk food is in the grocery store? You've got your meat, dairy, vegetables and staples aisles. Then the multiple aisles for junk food, freezer junk food, and assorted non grocery items.

I've learned to circle the perimeter of my stores to find the healthy options I want to buy.

 

[Judique]

That's not bad.

The meat alone for the chili was $100 - New York Strip. The total bill for this party this year was probably close to $600 - maybe more. Almost everything is organic.

$100 for the meat to feed 40-60 people sounds okay to me.

I bought a filet of beef from Costco to make Xmas dinner with. It was $68.
The rib roasts were close to $100. I was feeding 5 people.

Where you live and where you buy makes a huge difference.

 

[crisi]

$100 for the meat to feed 40-60 people sounds okay to me.

I bought a filet of beef from Costco to make Xmas dinner with. It was $68.
The rib roasts were close to $100. I was feeding 5 people.

Where you live and where you buy makes a huge difference.

Except that 3/4 of them don't eat meat. We are talking $100 to feed ten people - in chili. For a snack - we aren't feeding them dinner.

 

[Judique]

Except that 3/4 of them don't eat meat. We are talking $100 to feed ten people - in chili. For a snack - we aren't feeding them dinner.

That's why I said $100 doesn't sound that bad. If all you had to spend for 40-60 people was about $600 as per your post, your husband hosted a pretty cheap party. You averaged $10- $15 a person - again cheap cheap cheap for a party! Good job, husband!

And you had all those leftovers in terms of liquor and soda and wine.......made your party even more frugal.......

 

[ScottOKW2K]

A question to those spouses who are so quick to comment on the "poor choices" of their other spouse - have you actually taken them shopping with you enough so that he/she would know your usual choices and spending habits at the store? If you provide a list, do you actually Communicate with each other about the specifics of the items?

I will use the OP's list, and coments on how it would work in our household:

little wieners (for appetizers in the crock pot)
- I don't normally eat these, so you better be specific. Brand, size, etc.
1 bag of tortilla chips
- What size and brand?
juice
- frozen or bottled? Flavor ?
soda
- brand, canned or bottled? I usually buy canned because I don't like flat soda.
laundry detergent
- here = Tide Free. anything else and you are just wasting your money.
cat food
- no cat, but a large Golden. We use super-premium food we order on-line. Sounds expensive, doesn't it? He is in excellent health, beautiful coat, and no problems with skin rashs / hot spots (a common problem with goldens.) Sometimes cheap does not save you money.
pan for the turkey to cook in
- no comment here.
apple pie
- bakery or frozen ? Brand or store ?
cherry pie
- same as above.
couple cans of soup
- brand and type ?

As the one who does the grocery shopping in our household I am well aware that grocery stores are DESIGNED to entice the uninformed or infrequent shopper to buy more / spend more. 10/$10 tags may make you think it is on sale when it isn't, and when you see 3/$5 you would likely think you would have to buy three to get the sale price.

Here's how shopping works at our house. First, the money is OUR money, not mine or hers (though until recently 98% was from me.) Second, if the amount is over $50 we tell the other one about it - afterwards is ok. As far as the original topic in this thread - groceries - I do most of that shopping and I am better at it than my wife. I know the brands we typically get, what the usual prices are, and do check the sale paper when I enter the store if I haven't done so beforehand. I have also bought items "off-list" too. Why ? Because it was something I wanted and I could afford, or something my wife likes but would not normally buy for herself because of price - and I love her and want her to be happy. My wife recently purchased some clothes at a store she prefers. Could she have gotten similar clothes at another store for less - don't know. But she was proud they were on sale and she used a coupon she received from the store. Long story short - she looks beautiful in what she purchased, she is happy with the transaction, and I know her spending habits and philosophy enough after 29 years of marriage that I don't second-guess her. I don't know what she paid and truly don't care - I TRUST HER !

And to all those who are so proud of their grocery-shopping "skillz" - and sanctimonious about their spouses / significant other's lack of same - I hope they send you to Home Depot with a similar list. The look of confusion on your face would be priceless !

 

[Judique]

I hope they send you to Home Depot with a similar list. The look of confusion on your face would be priceless !
[/COLOR]

Awww, baby - this would be NO problem!! There's always going to be a MAN there who wants to help us out!!!

 

[ScottOKW2K]

Awww, baby - this would be NO problem!! There's always going to be a MAN there who wants to help us out!!!

Touche' My wife agrees.

 

[Iforgetmypassword]

This has been one of the most sexist threads I've read in a long time, and a lot of people apparently are stuck in the 1950s here, and have rigid duties in their homes, delegated strictly according to gender.

Unbelievable.

 

[4HppyCamprs]

My husband and I shop together. We have for 12 years. I will admit that one time way back when we first started dating I asked for him to pick me up some fruits and veggies because I was sick (we lived separately) and he managed to find the only two items I cannot stand peas and blueberries. I learned to communicate better from that experience... He was so proud and I was so sad lol. I keep prices in my head and he doesn't so I know if something is a good deal or not but his mind just works differently and that is okay. I know if on the rare occasion he goes to the store he will get exactly what is on the list and nothing more while I tend to throw things in the cart even if it is not on the list but we are within budget. We just shop differently and that is okay

Sent from my iPhone using DISBoards

 

[GMU MOM]

A question to those spouses who are so quick to comment on the "poor choices" of their other spouse - have you actually taken them shopping with you enough so that he/she would know your usual choices and spending habits at the store? If you provide a list, do you actually Communicate with each other about the specifics of the items?

I will use the OP's list, and coments on how it would work in our household:

little wieners (for appetizers in the crock pot)
- I don't normally eat these, so you better be specific. Brand, size, etc.
1 bag of tortilla chips
- What size and brand?
juice
- frozen or bottled? Flavor ?
soda
- brand, canned or bottled? I usually buy canned because I don't like flat soda.
laundry detergent
- here = Tide Free. anything else and you are just wasting your money.
cat food
- no cat, but a large Golden. We use super-premium food we order on-line. Sounds expensive, doesn't it? He is in excellent health, beautiful coat, and no problems with skin rashs / hot spots (a common problem with goldens.) Sometimes cheap does not save you money.
pan for the turkey to cook in
- no comment here.
apple pie
- bakery or frozen ? Brand or store ?
cherry pie
- same as above.
couple cans of soup
- brand and type ?

As the one who does the grocery shopping in our household I am well aware that grocery stores are DESIGNED to entice the uninformed or infrequent shopper to buy more / spend more. 10/$10 tags may make you think it is on sale when it isn't, and when you see 3/$5 you would likely think you would have to buy three to get the sale price.

Here's how shopping works at our house. First, the money is OUR money, not mine or hers (though until recently 98% was from me.) Second, if the amount is over $50 we tell the other one about it - afterwards is ok. As far as the original topic in this thread - groceries - I do most of that shopping and I am better at it than my wife. I know the brands we typically get, what the usual prices are, and do check the sale paper when I enter the store if I haven't done so beforehand. I have also bought items "off-list" too. Why ? Because it was something I wanted and I could afford, or something my wife likes but would not normally buy for herself because of price - and I love her and want her to be happy. My wife recently purchased some clothes at a store she prefers. Could she have gotten similar clothes at another store for less - don't know. But she was proud they were on sale and she used a coupon she received from the store. Long story short - she looks beautiful in what she purchased, she is happy with the transaction, and I know her spending habits and philosophy enough after 29 years of marriage that I don't second-guess her. I don't know what she paid and truly don't care - I TRUST HER !

And to all those who are so proud of their grocery-shopping "skillz" - and sanctimonious about their spouses / significant other's lack of same - I hope they send you to Home Depot with a similar list. The look of confusion on your face would be priceless !

Very well said. You touched on several different issues here.

I do 99% of the shopping in our household and if DH ever goes to the store, it's because I'm unable to so I am very thankful for his help. However, I make sure that he has a very detailed list of what I need; quantity, brand, size...I understand that for him it is not an easy task to go grocery shopping b/c he is not familiar with the store layout, brands we buy and of course the prices. I always show him my appreciation so he doesn't get discouraged going again if there's a need.
When the roles were reversed a couple months ago and I had to go into Lowe's to buy material for a job while DH was in the hospital, he also wrote me a very detailed list. Otherwise I would have been lost.

Honestly, I think OP's DH did a great job with this shopping trip. Last week, we had 13 people for Christmas Eve dinner and the cost for that one dinner was $360-380 and that's not including the things we already had on hand. It's probably because of all the good cuts of meat we bought but I wouldn't entertain any other way.

Also, even if this is his side of the family it is still your family...after all, you are married, his family is now your family, so I don't understand the mentality that b/c it's 'his' family he has to do the shopping, cleaning....

 

[aaarcher86]

Grocery shopping gives me a chance to escape my children.

I'm happy to go alone!

 

[Pooh Girl 71]

DH and I share in the grocery shopping duties. BUT, many, many years ago, he went alone and bought a $5 tomato. I flipped out. It took years to make up for that and get him to go grocery shopping again. Learn from my mistake and appreciate that he is willing to help!!

 

[cheshireqt]

Because of this thread, I sent my husband to the store today to pick up some tortillas for dinner. He came home with a package of raspberries, a package of blackberries, a huge bag of grapes ... and the tortillas.

Maggie

Mine regularly adds oranges, ice cream and magic shell for the ice cream.

I have never checked his receipt though, I guess it just does not matter much to me unless he forgets an item. He will always call from the store to be sure there is not something else I need and forgot to add, or if he can't find the brand I asked for. It goes both ways in our house though, he cooks some meals and will sometimes ask me to pick up items he needs. I am probably the worse culprit about things falling off the shelves into my cart and arriving home with things that were not on the list.

OP - I do get the frustration about the running out on house chores. My DH will regularly find anything else to do than to clean house for company, even when it is his family coming. Usually he decides that just before they come it is time to clean out the garage, he has extra stuff to do at work, etc.

 

[North of Mouse]

It could be your area, we live in Long Island, NY. It could be I shop at Costco, a trip for a few items there, could easily put anyone over any budget. I am a chef by trade so I cook from scratch pretty much everyday, and at family gatherings. Believe me, I try to cut corners.

As for you feeding 12 people for $50 for a family gathering, that is impressive! But, I am pretty sure, that is not the norm. I guess it comes down to what you buy and prepare for the meal. What the op stated for her gathering would not do for me. Meat, appetizers, desserts, the works are all variables. A rib roast at costco is more than your whole $50 dollar budget, it is more like $80+ for a 10 lb roast, comparably a rib roast on sale @ a local store would be around $40 so that leaves 10 dollars to spend on everything else, a $50 dollar budget for 12 just cannot cut it here.

Is rib roast the *only* acceptable meat to serve at a family gathering? Not in our part of the country.

I have been cooking for 40 years and never have any complaints about the meals I serve. I am also a *from scratch* person and can whip up some mighty tasty appealing dishes. There is always plenty to eat , and lots left over, so am not skimpy on what I serve. And, yes, it can very well be done on $50 or less. We do it all the time, with friends too, not just with family gatherings. Impressive?? Not to me, it's the norm - I had a very good teacher - my mom was an excellent cook.

As for grocery shopping, I'm probably in the minority, because I really enjoy it - have always done the gro. shopping myself as I've been a *stay at home* mom.

 

[ilovemk76]

For those who can serve 12 people, spend $50 and have leftovers, what are you serving?

What cuts and weight is the meat? Is it 73% ground beef or 93% lean ground CAB? Does everybody have to drink water or store brand soda? Do others bring along stuff to add to the meal?

I am trying to figure out what you serve for $4/person.

 

[pixiewings71]

A question to those spouses who are so quick to comment on the "poor choices" of their other spouse - have you actually taken them shopping with you enough so that he/she would know your usual choices and spending habits at the store? If you provide a list, do you actually Communicate with each other about the specifics of the items?

I will use the OP's list, and coments on how it would work in our household:

little wieners (for appetizers in the crock pot)
- I don't normally eat these, so you better be specific. Brand, size, etc.
1 bag of tortilla chips
- What size and brand?
juice
- frozen or bottled? Flavor ?
soda
- brand, canned or bottled? I usually buy canned because I don't like flat soda.
laundry detergent
- here = Tide Free. anything else and you are just wasting your money.
cat food
- no cat, but a large Golden. We use super-premium food we order on-line. Sounds expensive, doesn't it? He is in excellent health, beautiful coat, and no problems with skin rashs / hot spots (a common problem with goldens.) Sometimes cheap does not save you money.
pan for the turkey to cook in
- no comment here.
apple pie
- bakery or frozen ? Brand or store ?
cherry pie
- same as above.
couple cans of soup
- brand and type ?

As the one who does the grocery shopping in our household I am well aware that grocery stores are DESIGNED to entice the uninformed or infrequent shopper to buy more / spend more. 10/$10 tags may make you think it is on sale when it isn't, and when you see 3/$5 you would likely think you would have to buy three to get the sale price.

Here's how shopping works at our house. First, the money is OUR money, not mine or hers (though until recently 98% was from me.) Second, if the amount is over $50 we tell the other one about it - afterwards is ok. As far as the original topic in this thread - groceries - I do most of that shopping and I am better at it than my wife. I know the brands we typically get, what the usual prices are, and do check the sale paper when I enter the store if I haven't done so beforehand. I have also bought items "off-list" too. Why ? Because it was something I wanted and I could afford, or something my wife likes but would not normally buy for herself because of price - and I love her and want her to be happy. My wife recently purchased some clothes at a store she prefers. Could she have gotten similar clothes at another store for less - don't know. But she was proud they were on sale and she used a coupon she received from the store. Long story short - she looks beautiful in what she purchased, she is happy with the transaction, and I know her spending habits and philosophy enough after 29 years of marriage that I don't second-guess her. I don't know what she paid and truly don't care - I TRUST HER !

And to all those who are so proud of their grocery-shopping "skillz" - and sanctimonious about their spouses / significant other's lack of same - I hope they send you to Home Depot with a similar list. The look of confusion on your face would be priceless !

ROFL!!!!! When we go to Home Depot or Lowe's I always go with because DBF has the same problems there that he would at the grocery store. LOL
I just thought that was funny because a list from HD wouldn't cause me any more confusion then a list for Target or Raley's (my grocery store of choice).
If I send DBF to the store the list is very specific, or I send DD13 with him. LOL But I would never be upset with what he spent if I asked him to go to the store and he came back with the list that I sent with him.
This thread is sort of funny.....lol