Your worst cooking disaster?

[HOGFAN]

not me but my aunt

she put soap flakes instead of sugar in some brownies
they were TERRIBLE!

sorry double post

 

[liamsaunt]

I've had lots of kitchen disasters, but the time I set myself on fire might be one of the worst. I was cooking a big pot of pasta while wearing a thick sweatshirt with dangling strings. I leaned over the stove to take the pasta off the heat, drained it, and then smelled something....toasty. Like an idiot, I just stared into the empty pot, thinking I must have burned the bottom of it. Then, I started FEELING toasty. One of the sweatshirt strings had fallen into the gas flame and ignited. I didn't feel it at first because of the thickness of the shirt. By the time that I caught on, the flmaes had started to spread to the front of the shirt. I put out the fire by pressing the pasta pot up against my chest. I still have the sweatshirt, now stringless and with a big scorch mark in the middle of it.

 

[Lil_Tink]

Microwave+Caprisun=BAD!

 

[Papa Deuce]

Not me, but an ex GF... she came to my house for a cookout. She was bringing the macaroni salad.... She never cooked the macaroni! She said that she thought the mayonaise would be what softens the noodles!

 

[Mrs.Toad]

Microwave+Caprisun=BAD!

Liamsaunt, I'm glad you only burned your sweatshirt, and not yourself!

 

[SDFgirl]

When I was in high school, I made brownies one night. Somehow I forgot oil or eggs, I'm not sure which. Well, the brownies came out as HARD AS A ROCK! Nobody would touch them, so we hacked the whole thing into 3 or 4 pieces and gave it to the dog.

He couldn't even chew it. He tried to eat it, but it was too hard. He just carried it around like a bone!

 

[FroggyinArk]

ok some of you know, i am a pretty good cook, well versed in old fashioned souhtern cooking, shoirtly after dw and i moved in together i was making fried chicken, mashed taters biscuiits and gravy, realized after i mixed up the biscuits, i had used up all the flour, except what i had floured hte chicken with. so i say to my self, hey the rgavy is to go with chicken, what could it hurt to use "poultry seasoned" flour.... DO NOT MAKE GRAVY WITH POULTRY SEASONING it was nice creamy gravy, just had the strangest green color,, and tasted as green as it looked,,lol


we still talk about my green gravy, and it still get her to make gravy when i wanther to.

 

[swtnikki]

I had a good laugh at some of these. Now I don't have to feel bad about my story.

My b/f slept over Sat. night, so yesterday morning we made pancakes. He made the batter, & I proceeded to cook it on the griddle w/our gas oven. Well, I put the gas on too high, and the pancakes burnt. It was so bad my sister came downstairs & said, "What's that smell? I can smell it all the way upstairs." We aired out the kitchen, and then said boyfriend took over. The best part was that my brother told his g/f and she said, "Don't worry, I can't cook pancakes either". She's 16 though, I'm 27.

Said brother did a cooking disaster too when he was younger. He put the soft Chips ahoy cookies in the microwave for 20 min. instead of 20 seconds.

 

[Amapola]

I broke a pan while trying to make Ramen Noodles

You win!!! That takes real talent

 

[Kimmielee]

I was making a HUGE pot of chili for a party... everything was done... it had been simmering and I tasted it. "Needs more chili seasoning"... so... I was doing two things at once and grabbed what I THOUGHT was the chili seasoning and proceeded to dump CINNAMON into my wonderful pot of chili. Ick.

Oh, and the person that had the eggs explode because you were DISing??? Yeah, been there, done that... have the spot on my back porch that also caught fire when I flung the pan out the back door!! I do NOT sit down at my computer if I'm cooking now!

 

[Off2Nvrlnd]

Well, of course I have to start out with "I'm a very good cook now..but..." when I was 11 I used to babysit my db-10, cousin-8, uncle-9, and little cousin-18 months and I would have to feed them breakfast. I think we ran out of cereal or else I wanted to prove I was really grown up and decided I wanted to make oatmeal for everyone. I had never made it before and I read the directions which called for salt *optional. I thought this was necessary and proceeded to add about a tablespoon full. After I served everyone they all gave me this strange look and stopped eating. They all left the room, but the 18 mo old continued to eat it, so I figured it must be okay (didn't consider the fact that she confined to her high chair and probably starving) I even served her the leftovers
They never let me forget this and I am reminded of it everytime we get together. Especially because I'm the primary hostess.

Of course this cousin of mine now tried to cook for her fiance and burnt the ramen and lit a fire in her kitchen

Another time I really messed up was when I tried to make buffalo wings for my dh right after we got married. I bought Franks Red Hot Sauce and followed the directions on back except for it called for unsalted butter and I used salted butter because we were on a budget and I didn't want to spendthe extra $3. It was obviously inedible.

I guess you could say I have problems when it comes to cooking with salt

 

[munchkin bunchkin]

How could you mess up Hamburger Helper???It's easy ...just leave the measuring cup on the counter, have youngest DD pour clear dish liquid into while your helping older DD with something in the other room ,then come back, pour milk into cup , dump it into the hamburger and then wonder why it has bubbles!

 

[nbodyhome]

Lately? I had a few drops of water in a pot with oil, I was making fries and I caused an oil fire. I actually didn't realize you couldn't have a few drops of water in it, so now I'm VERY careful about everything being bone dry (and not just rinsed off) when it goes into hot oil. You'd think I'd know that at age 40, I'm just grateful I didn't get hurt!

 

[JunieJay]

I blame my worst cooking disaster on the DIS!

One morning I was up early and decided to boil some eggs. I put the eggs and water in the pot, put them on the stove, turned it on and logged onto the DIS for a quick peek-see while waiting for the water to boil. After a little while I heard some water running, and I thought dd was up and washing her face or something.

The water kept going and going for a long time and I thought "what is she doing up there?"

Then I heard this knocking and popping sound... like she was banging on something, and I thought "what is she doing up there?"

So, I start to walk upstairs to see what in the heck my dd is doing and I smell something burning and think "WHAT IS SHE DOING..." Oh, no! My eggs!!

I run to the kitchen to find half an exploded egg in the middle of the floor, tiny pieces of egg all over the counters, the top of the stove, the underside of the microwave, the pot empty of water but covered with charred egg remains. It smelled horrible and was a huge mess to clean up, but I laughed about it from the beginning.

OMG.

This thread and the wedding from hell thread have given me some well needed laughs all day long. This is one funny story! I can so see this happening to me.

 

[yeartolate]

Nothing recently, but many years back I made some oatmeal bar thing that didn't turn out - it wouldn't firm up. I started to put it down the garbage disposal and the phone rang. Well after chatting on the phone for a bit, I went out to the kitchen to find the oatmeal stuff cemented in the disposal. I was living in an apartment and called the maintainance man - he laughed hysterically. He had to replace the whole disposal.

 

[Serena]

Thanks all for making me feel better. I've burned a few things because of the dis. I did set the pan on fire once. I'm sure I've messed up a few things but the disaster that comes to mind is when I made a cake. Now, this was one of those little snack cakes that no one could mess up. Well, I had the bright idea of putting candles in it while it was still warm. So, my perfectly baked cake turned into a nice rainbow wax cake. My husband ate his birthday cake. We were more or less still on our honeymoon, he would have eaten mud.

 

[Evil Genius]

While married to my ex I decided to make home made gravy. So I take the drippings from the meat and add a little corn starch to it. Hmmmm nothing seems to be happening so I added a little more. Still a little watery so I add more. Turn down the heat, set the table, put dinner on the table and grab the gravy. It has now turned into what looks a brown jello mold. So I slide it on to a plate and take it to the table. Ex starts putting things on his plate, and asks if we have gravy. Yep, we do would you like a slice???? He didn't find it too funny.


Fast forward to this marriage. We love chili. Dh likes exotic spices.(This will be important in a second) So one day I look and see that I have everything to make a a big ole pot from scratch. Brown the meat, add the tomatoes, grab a sandwich bag full of what I think is red chile powder. Add a good handful and stir it in. Taste it, hey that's good but not spicy enough. Add another big handful and let it simmer. DH comes home and we sit down to eat. It is HOT!!! DH is happily eating away. Finally he asks me why does it taste a little different. I tell him I think it's because I used the red chile powder that he had in the sandwich bag. he does one of these and tells me that it's not red chile powder but ground birds eye chiles!! Now for those of you who don't know, birds eyes are very hot little peppers and you normally use a pinch of this stuff not too handfuls.

 

[Pooh Girl 71]

And people wonder why I don't cook

I was making popcorn on the stove top when I was in high school. It seemed to be taking a long time for the kernels to start popping so I decide to take a peek Next thing you know, it feels like I've been shot! One of those little suckers got away and hit me right in the breast. I still have a scar.

 

[JennaTX]

In my first year of marriage, I was going to make a blueberry dessert that my Mom had always made.

Well when I put it together, it just wasn't right. So I called my Mom, explained that it didn't look right, it was all smooshed in the pan.

She said "How long did you whip the carton of whipping cream?" What? You have to whip the whipping cream?

 

[kristen821]

I did the same thing as your neice. The recipe called for 3 cloves of garlic. We love garlic, so I doubled that and used 6. Which would have been perfectly fine except I used 6 bulbs, not 6 cloves.

I've done that before too. Live and learn!