Young children and suicide.

[Missy Mouse]

My professor's child committed suicide over the weekend. Very young, not even a teenager yet. This is the fourth young death I've come across and I just don't understand. I remember the teenage years being difficult and a rollercoaster of emotions, but hearing about completed suicides so young boggles my mind. Every guestbook entry says he was such a fun-loving, happy friend, how he always put a smile on everyone's face. I've done research from a website called 10,000 deaths for a few years now, ever since I accidentally came across a memorial for a young girl named Julie and boy named Beau who committed suicide at ages 13 and 11. I can't imagine watching your children be in that much pain at that young of an age. Some debate depression doesn't really exist, but it's hard to find any other reason besides mental illness for an 11-year-old child to take that kind of measure to relieve their pain. This is a topic that that interests me from a research standpoint, but to have it hit so close to home really strikes my heart. Sorry to bring up such a sensitive subject but I needed to get that off my chest.

 

[Hedy]

If you're interested in reading more about such things, the folks behind Timothy's Law might be of interest to you.
And to your professor. Losing anyone, esp. at the holidays, is such pain, but a child....

 

[Missy Mouse]

If you're interested in reading more about such things, the folks behind Timothy's Law might be of interest to you.
And to your professor. Losing anyone, esp. at the holidays, is such pain, but a child....

That story makes me ill. It's one of those situations you feel so passionate about yet can't do a lot about. Sometimes you don't even seen the warning signs. Thank you for your reply. And on a happier note, your cat is absolutely adorable.

 

[nealymouse]

Im so sorry. We had a 15 yr old girl in town a few years ago shoot herself. It was so upsetting to everyone. Prayers to your professor.

 

[LuvOrlando]

Two words- CHILD ABUSE

Not necessarily the parents but someone close enough to do damage. Anyone who wants to protect their kids should open the lines of communication at a very young age. Tell kids you can handle "ANTHING' they tell you and mean it, most keep secrets to protect either one or both of their parents from being hurt by the news. Discuss people around them and how they make them feel...no-one should be off limits or above belief. Don't be so quick to believe the other side of the story, abusers have everything to lose by being honest and the kids have everything to lose by coming foward. Be aware that often older kids abuse younger kids, siblings, step siblings, neighbors, friends siblings etc. This is not a small problem. Its sad that kids often choose suicide over revelation.

PS there are 2 kinds of depression. One kind comes from a physiological cause. The second comes from environmental issues. Both are awful but one can be avoided.

 

[kdibattista]

Thoughts and prayers for your professor and his family... they will never be the same. I don't think there is anything more tragic then a family suffering a suicide. I speak from experience

 

[Missy Mouse]

Two words- CHILD ABUSE

Not necessarily the parents but someone close enough to do damage. Anyone who wants to protect their kids should open the lines of communication at a very young age. Tell kids you can handle "ANTHING' they tell you and mean it, most keep secrets to protect either one or both of their parents from being hurt by the news. Discuss people around them and how they make them feel...no-one should be off limits or above belief. Don't be so quick to believe the other side of the story, abusers have everything to lose by being honest and the kids have everything to lose by coming foward. Be aware that often older kids abuse younger kids, siblings, step siblings, neighbors, friends siblings etc. This is not a small problem. Its sad that kids often choose suicide over revelation.

PS there are 2 kinds of depression. One kind comes from a physiological cause. The second comes from environmental issues. Both are awful but one can be avoided.

I find your advice interesting, disconcerting, and very true. I love that you said "tell your kids you can handle anything they tell you, and mean it." All too often children don't realize they have an outlet in their parents, and that feelings are okay to talk about. Death and depression are such taboo subjects that families often dance around the subject because it is too hard and too awkward to discuss. I think most often kids don't realize that the feelings they have can be part of the teenage hardships, and that they have choices.

 

[Missy Mouse]

Thoughts and prayers for your professor and his family... they will never be the same. I don't think there is anything more tragic then a family suffering a suicide. I speak from experience

to you. I'm sorry you had to have that kind of experience.

 

[chell]

 

[mytwotinks]

This is heartbreaking. I can't imagine how a parent could go on after a child that young takes their own life.

 

[Pam]

Thoughts and prayers for your professor and his family... they will never be the same. I don't think there is anything more tragic then a family suffering a suicide. I speak from experience

Unfortunately I share that experience - and you're right, the pain and extreme sorrow NEVER leave.

kdibattista

And to the OP - my condolences to your professor.

 

[Sheree Bobbins]

This is truly tragic. Maybe there should be more aggressive marketing by the mental health professionals on what to look for in a suicidal child. The children are not skilled at hiding their feelings. There must be some way through to them.

 

[Hedy]

This is truly tragic. Maybe there should be more aggressive marketing by the mental health professionals on what to look for in a suicidal child. The children are not skilled at hiding their feelings. There must be some way through to them.

Obviously, I fly my opinions on mental health high, but I really think there needs to be both more awareness of childhood mental health issues, as well as follow through. I don't know how they could, though, as I'm not sure what could make the oodles of parents who presume their kids are just moody or bratty that their kids have a disease? Childhood depression info

 

[Narnian_Princess]

It's so sad when a child with so much life to live yet commits suicide. A classmate of my 12-year-old niece's took her own life a few months back, and it is a terrible thing. Things must have to be terrible for a child to kill him/herself. Prayers for the professor and his or her family.

 

[disneymom3]

I think more and more we are seeing things in younger children that used to be things we saw in teens. I don't know why but it does seem to be the case. Teen sex is one prime example. 20 years ago you NEVER heard of jr high kids having sex now you do all the time. Same with drug use. Just keeps getting younger. Even something as basic as the way they dress or how they get into that cliquey thing. Just younger and younger. It is so incredibly sad. We have quite a history of family depression and we watch our kids for signs very closely. For some folks I think you don't even realize how bad it is though. No one should have to suffer like that--the family or the person who was so unhappy to choose this path.

Hugs to all of you who have been touched by this.

 

[Missy Mouse]

I think more and more we are seeing things in younger children that used to be things we saw in teens. I don't know why but it does seem to be the case. Teen sex is one prime example. 20 years ago you NEVER heard of jr high kids having sex now you do all the time. Same with drug use. Just keeps getting younger. Even something as basic as the way they dress or how they get into that cliquey thing. Just younger and younger. It is so incredibly sad. We have quite a history of family depression and we watch our kids for signs very closely. For some folks I think you don't even realize how bad it is though. No one should have to suffer like that--the family or the person who was so unhappy to choose this path.

Hugs to all of you who have been touched by this.

I agree with this and I think the problem lies in that although they are experiencing things younger and younger, they are NOT little adults. They are NOT prepared for the emotions that follow suit. I don't think there is enough emphasis on the mental health and wellness of children. HMOs mandate so much it's hard to get a push for something like a screening exam.

 

[DisneyfeverTN]

A young child committing suicide is one of the saddest things I have ever heard. A boy down the street from us hung himself in his garage. I can't even begin to imagine the pain his family is going through. It's truly haunting.

 

[HomeSweetDisney]

Suicide is such a horrible thing. To have a child commit suicide just seems even sadder

 

[JennyMominRI]

I think more and more we are seeing things in younger children that used to be things we saw in teens. I don't know why but it does seem to be the case. Teen sex is one prime example. 20 years ago you NEVER heard of jr high kids having sex now you do all the time. Same with drug use. .

This is just not true..I graduated in 1988 and there was plenty of sex and drug use going on in middle school. My Jr High schols bus drove straight to the police station because the kids were using drugs on the bus..When I moved to New Hampshire I belonged to a group called Peer Outreach. It was our groups job to go to school all over the state and talk about drugs,sex suicide etc..I went to a place called NH teen institute to train for this..We were all high schoolers with experience with these issues..In the Peer Outreach group there were several 9th graders who were members of NA...I went to NA meeting with them and they were full of teens, young teens that were already drug addicts/alcoholics...One of the counselors had been an addict since he was small..His parents put alcohol in his bottle to keep him quiet as a baby..Why was I a Peer Outreach counselor? Because in 1985 my 14 year old friend killed herself..We regulalrly spoke to very ,very young addicts and alcoholics.. The majority of kids I went to school with were sexually active by 15 years of age or so.. In my small town in NH I knew a girls who dropped out of school due to pregnancy . I think maybe people are just more open about it now than in the 80's.

 

[WeirdTigger27]

"They're frightened of jumping, in case they survive."~BNL When I Fall

I thought about doing it once when I was about 9. All the kids made fun of me, the only "friends" I had were people who were also made fun of and I felt bad for them. I never felt I was good enough for Dad. I wrote a note and everything. I thought that I would be in more trouble if I couldn't "finish". I ate the note so mom would never find out what I had almost done. It would have broken her heart. I wish no one had to feel like that.

The only bad experience I had on our trip to WDW was when we were going to see Fantasmic. My DH had to go to the restroom first so I waited outside for him. There was this man with a thick Scottish accent yelling at a young boy about 5 calling him trash. "Who do you think you are? You're trash." He'd grab the boy by the arm and he'd cry a little louder. I just stood there with my eyes closed wishing that I could take it away from him. What could I do? I felt so badly for him. What could he have possibly done to be called trash? No child should ever be called trash. I hope that boy overcomes whatever his life has brought him.