WWYD - Shady things happened with workers while roofing

[sam_gordon]

It's about respect of others and cleaning up your dang mess after you asked to use the bathroom.

Never did she think they would be coming in to poop in her bathroom. Like she said, she would never ask to use a strangers bathroom to do that. She'd rather drive a quarter mile down the road and use the port-0-potty that was there.

Oh, lesson was learned!

If they were asking to use the bathroom, they had to do one of two things (or both). If you DD didn't think about #2 (literally), that's on her.

Was the "mess" (which apparently wasn't an issue early on, just the smell and the open door) contained inside the bowl?

Maybe the fruit thing needed to be addressed on the spot but these people only did these things when she was home alone. When DH was there they didn't do anything. Shady.

Maybe they didn't need to do those things when the DH was there? Did the workers know DD was home alone? How? Even not seeing anyone doesn't mean there's no one in the house.

 

[Snowflakey]

I just don't get the respect thing. He had to go. Honest question, do you think he should have stated that he needed to go number 2?

Maybe it would all make more sense to me if I knew the layout. You say he was "on display". Was the door all the way open?

door all the way open and the toilet was right on the right as you walked in so you saw the complete back of him

 

[Pea-n-Me]

I also was a little confused from the beginning of this thread about this:

all but one could speak English

Was this meant to be “only one spoke English”?

 

[Snowflakey]

If they were asking to use the bathroom, they had to do one of two things (or both). If you DD didn't think about #2 (literally), that's on her.

Was the "mess" (which apparently wasn't an issue early on, just the smell and the open door) contained inside the bowl?

Maybe they didn't need to do those things when the DH was there? Did the workers know DD was home alone? How? Even not seeing anyone doesn't mean there's no one in the house.

Mess up the back toilet lid - not just the bowl

Yes they knew she was alone because the only one who spoke english asked if her husband was around

 

[sam_gordon]

door all the way open and the toilet was right on the right as you walked in so you saw the complete back of him

huh? Every toilet I've seen is up against the wall (with or without a tank). A person sits with their back to the wall. So how did she see "the complete back of him"?

 

[Snowflakey]

I also was a little confused from the beginning of this thread about this:

Was this meant to be “only one spoke English”?

Yes

 

[Pea-n-Me]

They should’ve asked if they could take some apples. But again, maybe it’s cultural and they really didn’t know you’d normally ask. These are things we’re going to have to work out as more immigrants take these types of jobs.

 

[focusondisney]

at the first sign of a bag and them going to it telling them "um no what are you doing, you can't take those, etc" something to that effect (assertive and yet polite tone of voice) would have hopefully had them stop right there. Language barrier or no language barrier much of this could have been worked out well enough to understand expectations.

This. If your daughter makes part of her income from the fruit, she absolutely should have gone out & stopped them. I have had contact with people who speak all kinds of languages in my profession. Everyone understands “no”. I don’t care how young or an adult she is. If you’re old enough to be married & own a home, you are old enough to speak up for yourself. For gosh sake, did she really think her safety was in danger just because there were men on her property???

Because of my husband’s work hours, I have dealt with home improvements, appliance repairs, had workers in & out of my home etc for all 44 yeas of my marriage. I have never been “mansplained” or felt talked down to or intimidated by any of them. I am informed before getting estimates or having work done. I also refuse to believe that every man on the planet has intent to harm women, so I am not fearful of someone just because they are male. Its up to each person to be strong & stand up for themselves. Male or female.

 

[Moliphino]

It's about respect of others and cleaning up your dang mess after you asked to use the bathroom.

Never did she think they would be coming in to poop in her bathroom. Like she said, she would never ask to use a strangers bathroom to do that. She'd rather drive a quarter mile down the road and use the port-0-potty that was there.

Oh, lesson was learned!

He probably didn't know where cleaning supplies were and didn't want to rummage through cabinets. Wiping it off with TP would've been something, but not really clean and then she may not have even known it needed to be thoroughly cleaned.

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

I can be and will be involved if my DD wants me to.

Well duh..but you did ask the internet for advice.

"Convenient" I now have a meeting. Um - this is my job. Meetings are scheduled every day. If for one second you think I'm now not attending the meeting because of comments here that makes me laugh out loud!

Nah that was just because when you got push back you mention the meeting you now have and I'm sure you did have a meeting that came up. Still my viewpoint was you shouldn't have even thought to attend a meeting at all especially over this stuff (which was the main point). This is just about unprofessionalism on the employees part and in the scheme of household maintenance tasks minor.

I don't know the age of your daughter but I was 25 when we started the building process and 26 when I was dealing with these warranty issues alone. Of course I can ask my mother "hey what would you do" and my mother-in-law is certainly not short of her own advice (mostly eye rolling because it's all over the place lol) but this is our house first and foremost and our responsibility, we can deal with unprofessional contractors on our own. The going advice here on this thread is your daughter needs to get there.

 

[Pea-n-Me]

He probably didn't know where cleaning supplies were and didn't want to rummage through cabinets. Wiping it off with TP would've been something, but not really clean and then she may not have even known it needed to be thoroughly cleaned.

This is a good point. And he couldn’t explain or apologize because he didn’t speak English. Maybe he was actually embarrassed (? mortified), who knows. I generally break out the Lysol wipes anytime anyone’s used our bathrooms.

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

He probably didn't know where cleaning supplies were and didn't want to rummage through cabinets. Wiping it off with TP would've been something, but not really clean and then she may not have even known it needed to be thoroughly cleaned.

On any bathroom I have guests use I have a plunger and a toilet brush right next to it. I wonder if the daughter had that. It may be gross to think about but a spray for scent, a plunger and a toilet bowl brush to me seem a practical necessity so people know if you have an issue, right there within reach is something you can use. I'm not sure I was really taught that so much that I thought about situations I've been in, that I'm sure everyone has been in.

 

[nw6675]

I had windows installed and one of the first things the lead asked was where the bathroom was in case anyone had to use it. I think one did.

We had the house rewired completely and the young man used our facilities a LOT. It grossed me out and I cleaned daily, but I wanted work done and not him leaving repeatedly. He also asked for snacks though when he saw the rice krispie treats lol. He was young and we just chalked it up to not being a seasoned professional yet. He did a great job otherwise.

The apples would have ticked me off, but also in the spirit of generosity I would have let it go. Just complained to my friends and family to have something to B about.

 

[TAX GUY]

This one is hard to follow, because it changes as it goes on.

Anyway, seems the screenname is fitting with this one

 

[kymom99]

This is a good point. And he couldn’t explain or apologize because he didn’t speak English. Maybe he was actually embarrassed (? mortified), who knows. I generally break out the Lysol wipes anytime anyone’s used our bathrooms.

My thought was that he didn’t drive there and the driver didn’t want to stop working to take him to a bathroom off property. He probably had a true emergency. But he should have shut the door. And the others shouldn’t have asked. This is a case of give an inch…

 

[Pea-n-Me]

On any bathroom I have guests use I have a plunger and a toilet brush right next to it. I wonder if the daughter had that. It may be gross to think about but a spray for scent, a plunger and a toilet bowl brush to me seem a practical necessity so people know if you have an issue, right there within reach is something you can use. I'm not sure I was really taught that so much that I thought about situations I've been in, that I'm sure everyone has been in.

I feel like you still need cleaning supplies. Plain water doesn’t always cut it. (I keep a brush out but not cleaners.)

In a way he’s in a lose-lose situation. If he did go rummaging to find supplies and cleaned it up suitably, then the homeowners would be upset he went through their cabinets. (No doubt you’d not only hear the doors close but smell the cleaners if that were the case, or see evidence of paper towels or wipes in the trash, etc.) If he leaves it, granted, he doesn’t have to go through the cabinets, but homeowners are upset he made a mess and didn’t clean it up. Can’t win.

If someone’s got explosive diarrhea, ain’t nothing holding it back! The alternative to the bathroom probably would’ve been a tree. Maybe he’d gotten into the apples earlier than they knew!

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

This. If your daughter makes part of her income from the fruit, she absolutely should have gone out & stopped them. I have had contact with people who speak all kinds of languages in my profession. Everyone understands “no”. I don’t care how young or an adult she is. If you’re old enough to be married & own a home, you are old enough to speak up for yourself. For gosh sake, did she really think her safety was in danger just because there were men on her property???

Because of my husband’s work hours, I have dealt with home improvements, appliance repairs, had workers in & out of my home etc for all 44 yeas of my marriage. I have never been “mansplained” or felt talked down to or intimidated by any of them. I am informed before getting estimates or having work done. I also refuse to believe that every man on the planet has intent to harm women, so I am not fearful of someone just because they are male. Its up to each person to be strong & stand up for themselves. Male or female.

I agree.

It's been a few years but we had one time where in our backyard, which backs up to woods and some of that is on our property, I looked out to our window in the back and saw two people there in our backyard by our wood storage area! I was shocked at how brazen that was in the broad daylight. They were picking up wood that was on the ground to use for their firepit but there were two issues. 1) it should have been clear they were on someone's property given they were right behind our wood storage and the property lines don't make crazy shapes and 2) the woods aren't a property you can just go and take what you want anyhow. Technically it had been recently deeded from HOA common ground to city property so I'm sure the people thought there was less of an issue with that but still.

We quickly went outside and asked them what they were doing and that's when they told us it was for their firepit. They were extremely sorry and promptly dropped the wood they had gathered from the ground, we told them it's fine that they can take those things they had already gathered but no more (although we use fallen wood from the trees on our property for our own firepit) but you could tell they were very embarrassed. And they left. Had I been alone I still would have done that.

After that I told my husband I would really like our property line marked in the woods area since we didn't have a fence for future issues even though I didn't anticipate ones and even though you should have been able to know this was someone's property not common city grounds. So we took some of the yellow rock that is underneath all the lots here in the neighborhood leftover from when our house was built and we requested to keep (common for people to do landscape projects and the like with this) and my husband took the exact measurements from the city's website and put the rocks as like a border of our property in the backyard. When it's all filled in it may be difficult to see but if you're out there walking you'll see a line of rocks and should be able to figure out it's a border.

Of course I personally wouldn't be walking out there in the woods because that area is exactly where the snakes have dens and one of the main snakes in the neighborhood is copperheads..but that's a different story lol.

 

[Pea-n-Me]

This. If your daughter makes part of her income from the fruit, she absolutely should have gone out & stopped them. I have had contact with people who speak all kinds of languages in my profession. Everyone understands “no”. I don’t care how young or an adult she is. If you’re old enough to be married & own a home, you are old enough to speak up for yourself. For gosh sake, did she really think her safety was in danger just because there were men on her property???

Because of my husband’s work hours, I have dealt with home improvements, appliance repairs, had workers in & out of my home etc for all 44 yeas of my marriage. I have never been “mansplained” or felt talked down to or intimidated by any of them. I am informed before getting estimates or having work done. I also refuse to believe that every man on the planet has intent to harm women, so I am not fearful of someone just because they are male. Its up to each person to be strong & stand up for themselves. Male or female.

I’m pretty sure we were in the same line of work, and of a similar generation. I’m with you in that I’ve always dealt with workers and it’s always been fine. But I do feel that times are changing and that people today do have to be more careful than they once were. Evidence from technology like home cameras have taught us a lot, and we’d be foolish not to pay attention to that. Not everyone can be trusted. I do agree that everyone understands ’No”, regardless of language. (There are a few others, too.)

 

[mrodgers]

For those who think it weird or wrong for workers working on your home not to use the bathroom, I wouldn't open up any 5 gallon buckets you find laying around, or accidentally left at your home.

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

I feel like you still need cleaning supplies. Plain water doesn’t always cut it. (I keep a brush out but not cleaners.)

In a way he’s in a lose-lose situation. If he did go rummaging to find supplies and cleaned it up suitably, then the homeowners would be upset he went through their cabinets. (No doubt you’d not only hear the doors close but smell the cleaners if that were the case, or see evidence of paper towels or wipes in the trash, etc.) If he leaves it, granted, he doesn’t have to go through the cabinets, but homeowners are upset he made a mess and didn’t clean it up. Can’t win.

If someone’s got explosive diarrhea, ain’t nothing holding it back! The alternative to the bathroom probably would’ve been a tree. Maybe he’d gotten into the apples earlier than they knew!

I'd clean the toilet afterwards if I felt like it needed it (and the usage of febreeze style spray is probably a good indication lol) but I'm just saying I leave out these supplies for my guests (as well as for me too) because things happen. The worker may have been even more embarrassed than the homeowner for all we know. I wouldn't be upset in the least if I know someone tried even as unpleasant as the cleaning task afterwards may be at least they tried.

One thing the daughter would have to keep in mind is guests in general. Sure having a door opened (by accident or on purpose) is probably not one of those you'd expect to encounter but people doing their business is. As gross as the topic is haven't we all found ourselves walking up to the invisible wall of stink you're far more likely to encounter this stuff with your family and friends in your home than a contractor (and there's DIS threads to prove it )