WWYD- coat stained at school harvest festival?

[Momto4boys]

If a parent knows there is a messy activity going on then the parent takes the responsibility for whatever might happen. If I were in that situation I would have taken my childs jacket off..turned it inside out..and put it back on. That is if I even put on a new jacket in the first place. I would have tried something else like using an old jacket or bundling up with sweaters and a lighter jacket or something.

This is NOT the school's fault..or LL Beans. It's hopefully a lesson learned.

 

[sk!mom]

I would be irritated but I wouldn't make a big deal. I'd be glad that someone tried to plan fun activities.

I especially wouldn't make a big deal if I was there and could have taken the coat to be cleaned immediatly or removed DD from the activity if it was a problem to me.

Bottom line- you were there and could have taken action- you didn't so don't complain now.

 

[Nolcrest]

I would possibly see your point of view (but probably not ) if you were not aware of the activity. However you said you were a volunteer there. You were fully aware of the situation - you knew exactly where your child was sitting. You could have right then and there prevented this from happening. If you didn't find the need to get involved how can you place the blame on the teacher or the school?

Sorry, but I work with pre-schoolers and it bothers me when parents bring their kids to class looking adorable but not practical for the activites we do. This age learns thru play and that means getting messy. Honestly a kid wearing an LL Bean jacket or a WalMArt jacket would make no difference to me and would not be treated any differently. I'm more interested that they are participating in the activity and enjoying themselves.

Please don't place the blame on anyone other than your poor judgement & don't try to return it to LL Bean. There was no defect in their product.

So the question was WWYD? I would knock myself on the side of the head for bringing my kid to a school fall festival wearing clothing that shouldn't get dirty or even possibly ruined. And I'd consider it a learning experience for the future.

All that being said - it kinda sounded like a fun time for the kids.

 

[TupperMom7]

Okay, so OP - you were right there? You stood by and let your child near paint with the brand new coat on and did nothing?

You had option of getting your child away from the paint with the coat on. Or you could have taken the coat off of her while she was working on the mural - put an old sweatshirt on her so she wouldn't be too chilly.

There is no way that I would expect the school to foot the bill for a new coat when I knew about it and could have prevented it from happening.

However, when I send my kids to school, I do not expect their clothes to come home with stains on them. Even when they were in kindergarten. They are sent in with a smock, which is usually one of their Dad's old shirts, and they wear that over their clothes. Not once - five kids - have they come home with a stain. A rip or something from the playground, yes, but not a stain.

So to those posters who say they are teachers and can't monitor kids for stains, etc. and would rather that they be creative than clean - are you buying these kids clothes? Do you have to do their laundry? Take necessary precautions like wearing smocks, or if they were to be painting a mural - covering their coats with large old sweatshirts would have helped!

 

[lovesmurfs]

WWID? Let it go, both from my mind and from my heart -- you're only going to stay bitter about it if you don't. Practice forgiveness -- I'm sure that you won't see outdoor painting at the school again. If you hadn't been volunteering to see the event and your child came home with paint on her sleeve, would you be thinking differently?

My kids have LLBean and Lands End clothing for their quality, not so much for their looks....they keep them warm, and the coat's still going to do that. I agree with finding creative ways of covering it if you need to, but, if the coat's doing what it's supposed to be doing (i.e. keeping them warm outside), the sleeves are going to get beaten up by season's end anyway.

I agree with PPs that going to LL Bean or the credit card company for a refund is just a poor ethical and moral decision.

 

[rantnnravin]

I agree with PPs that going to LL Bean or the credit card company for a refund is just a poor ethical and moral decision.

I believe the suggestion regarding credit cards had to do with their purchase protection insurance:

... most insurance will cover purchases made using the credit card against theft, loss, or accidental damage that occurs within a certain period of time. Typically, purchase protection will cover you for about 90 days from the date of purchase.

how is using the provisions of this insurance unethical?

 

[dis-happy]

I'd drop it. You say you have a good relationship with this teacher, why mess that up? Unless you're planning to move you'll be at that school (and dealing with the administration) for several years to come. I agree with the other posters that kids should come to school ready to get messy, and they already took what precautions they thought they should by using washable paint. If they were coloring with Sharpies or something your point would be a lot stronger.

Finally, don't make your child upset by being upset over the coat. I know you wouldn't mean to do this, but it's easy to have happen. The best thing you can do is let it go. And now you don't have to worry about it when the next thing comes around the corner.

 

[englishteacha]

I'm a teacher, and I try to let kids/parents know ahead of time if we're going to do something messy. I've found dish detergent, shout, Oxyclean all work pretty well at getting out paint. Never put a stained item in the dryer. Heat sets in the stain. Wash it a few more times, trying different things along the way. Good luck!

 

[mykidslovesdisney]

Wow what alot of responses. First off I am not concerned about how I appear to the school. I am not going to ruin any relationships and furthermore the statement of going to the office on Monday was NOT a threat. I will follow thru w/ what I said. I am an extremely involved parent- one of a handful. I am known to most of the school and students. We are a small school. I seriously don't believe that it would destroy my rep to go and complain. I am not worried about the teacher getting into trouble bc it was a school wide acitivity. Yes I was standing there- I was told the paint would come out. Unfortunately it did not. IF I had known it was a painting activity outside I would have dressed her properly. In the past we have been told if an activity would be messy- IE DS9 field trip was to the marsh at the beach - wear old shoes- my kids only own 1 pair of shoes. He came home w/ his shoes destroyed. He actually came home in his socks bc his shoes were unwearable. I had to buy a new pair that night bc I was advised that old shoes are needed which he did not have. That I understand. My kids get 1 pair of shoes and 1 winter coat. We have a heavy winter coat then a light fleece coat. That morning weather required the warm winter coat. The stains on the coat looked like they were the run off a paint being washed off another coat. Like I stated before a para was washing a coat off and my dd coat was on a nearby table. I will try to keep rewashing the coat but I don't feel comfortable using the magic easer on it. I am not going to go to LL bean- never stated I would. I do expect dc clothing to wear from playing but not the outer jacket bc of painting. Like OP stated when you go to paint you put on old clothing for that- in this case it was no known to me ahead of time.
The teacher totally agreed w/ me on going to the office- It is more to express my dismay in the activity enviroment and how it was set up. I am all for hands on creativity but w/ the proper clothing. - smocks,- old sweatshirts etc.
Thanks for the nice and not so nice comments. I will follow thru w/ the school on monday.

 

[allyphoe]

My DD5 went to a summer camp that had rotating activities each week. The weeks she did art projects with washable markers, crayons, and white glue, the instructors supplied smocks. The week they did fabric paint and tie dye, there were no smocks. After the first day, I sent her with an apron - which she didn't put on, because no one else had one.

That week, she ruined two dresses (one only worn twice previously, one bought at consignment but like new), and another one I managed to scrape enough paint off with a dull knife that she didn't object to wearing it. One of the ruined dresses is at her grandparents' house as emergency backup, and the other is play clothes for our house. I wish she'd wear that second set, since the paint is close in color to the dress, and I think it doesn't look that bad.

Was I unhappy? Yes. Did I think the camp had any obligation to keep my kid cleaner? Not really. Kids get dirty. (We've also lost one of a set of sent-from-relatives-in-Taiwan, likely irreplaceable, mitten-glove-things somewhere between leaving home and returning home. Kids lose stuff.)

 

[mikkishelles]

OP has already told the teacher she will be stopping in to the office on Monday if it did not come out in the wash. If i were the OP, I would follow through with whatever I said I was going to do. I'm not generally one who makes empty threats. DD knows this all too well
If I were OP and this were my child's coat, I would have addressed it at pick-up time when I saw the paint all over her coat. I likely would have gone to the main office then and asked to speak with the art teacher to find out the best methods for removal - since she would be the most likely person to have to deal with such issues on a regular basis and has probably developed a number of strategies. By doing so, the main office would have been made aware of the situation and any fact-finding / offers from administration would have come then.

Ongoing communication with your teachers, school and administration - for good or troublesome issues - is important. If the OP is a regular helper mom, I doubt she'll be viewed as a "problem" parent. As long as she approaches the situation with a calm and level head, explains that she has tried to get the paint out and asks for suggestions on what course of action she should take next -while also mentioning that had she known in advance that this activity was going to take place, she would have provided her DD with different outerwear so as not to ruin her new coat - those in the school will try to help her. It's all in the attitude you approach the situation with. She might also want to be sure to mention how much fun everyone seemed to be having and how much her DD learned from the experience.

FWIW: I deal with a number of "problem" parents over the course of a given year. It never diminishes the education I provide for their children. It comes with the territory.

Asking for solutions to eliminate the stains would be one thing. I am just hoping that it is not an issue of reprimanding the teacher or looking for monetary compensation.

 

[heartsy77]

I don't think you are going to like my reply. But as a daycare provider and someone who previously worked in the school system as a teachers assistant I have to give my honest opinion.
Your children go to school every day to learn, create, and play. I would hope you would be more outraged if they all sat around making sure they stayed clean than the fact that were being engaged in a learning activity and got dirty.
I am positive I am not the first person to ever tell you that children should be dressed to learn and create. School is not a fashion show.
It is really frustrating for teachers and care providers to have an activity planned that is really fun for all the kids and to have to monitor coats and stains.
I would rather my child got dirty and learned and played.
Dress them accordingly.
JMO.

As a fellow daycare provider I agree! I always tell parents if you don't want your kids clothes dirty don't send them in nice clothes!

 

[lovesmurfs]

Wow what alot of responses. First off I am not concerned about how I appear to the school. I am not going to ruin any relationships and furthermore the statement of going to the office on Monday was NOT a threat. I will follow thru w/ what I said. I am an extremely involved parent- one of a handful. I am known to most of the school and students. We are a small school. I seriously don't believe that it would destroy my rep to go and complain. I am not worried about the teacher getting into trouble bc it was a school wide acitivity. Yes I was standing there- I was told the paint would come out. Unfortunately it did not. IF I had known it was a painting activity outside I would have dressed her properly. In the past we have been told if an activity would be messy- IE DS9 field trip was to the marsh at the beach - wear old shoes- my kids only own 1 pair of shoes. He came home w/ his shoes destroyed. He actually came home in his socks bc his shoes were unwearable. I had to buy a new pair that night bc I was advised that old shoes are needed which he did not have. That I understand. My kids get 1 pair of shoes and 1 winter coat. We have a heavy winter coat then a light fleece coat. That morning weather required the warm winter coat. The stains on the coat looked like they were the run off a paint being washed off another coat. Like I stated before a para was washing a coat off and my dd coat was on a nearby table. I will try to keep rewashing the coat but I don't feel comfortable using the magic easer on it. I am not going to go to LL bean- never stated I would. I do expect dc clothing to wear from playing but not the outer jacket bc of painting. Like OP stated when you go to paint you put on old clothing for that- in this case it was no known to me ahead of time.
The teacher totally agreed w/ me on going to the office- It is more to express my dismay in the activity enviroment and how it was set up. I am all for hands on creativity but w/ the proper clothing. - smocks,- old sweatshirts etc.
Thanks for the nice and not so nice comments. I will follow thru w/ the school on monday.

I totally understand your points above. I guess when I see WWYD in the subject line, I'm thinking that a poster is looking for input so that they can see others' points of view before taking action. Sorry for any misunderstanding.

 

[JAM3]

I have to admit I skipped over some of the post in the middle but I have to say to OP: As a former day care teacher, school teacher, camp counselor and activity director I AGREE that you should complain to the office. I think it is my responsibility to do everything I can to keep the child looking like they did when they came. If it is going to be extra messy I think it is my job to let the parents know so they can dress them appropriately. I also think it is my job to supply appropriate items to help assist in cleaning. I think it was poor planning on the Harvest Festival committee part (which I am sure there was one!). I think letting them know that there was damage due to this activity would be great feedback for them. I did not get the impression that OP was looking for anything, she just wanted to give them feedback to help prevent a similar situation in the future. I think people should ease up on her! I still can not believe the number of people who just say kids get dirty. Yes, they do, but painting outside in a winter jacket. Would you do this at home? It was just poor planning. Something that can be easily avoided next year without any big drama over the problem this year. Just had to say my two cents.

 

[mombare]

I totally understand your points above. I guess when I see WWYD in the subject line, I'm thinking that a poster is looking for input so that they can see others' points of view before taking action. Sorry for any misunderstanding.

I agree with this poster - I don't think anyone was trying to be mean, but there was some good conversation going on about WWYD (and possible consequences). It is great that you have already decided on a plan of action, and you are confident with that decision...I think your original post made people think you were trying to get something in return for the coat, not just discuss the inappropriate-ness of the activity (which really was). It would have been more useful to know the teacher was in approval of you talking with the office, as that changes things. Just perception of reading a post...
Good luck!

 

[cruellababy]

I guess I would just chalk it up to kids are messy and buy another coat- and I wouldn't complain to the school. JMHO.

 

[lntsmom]

I only read the first few replies because I'm dumbfounded! First, congrats to all of you who are weathly enough to have multiple coats for your children. This may come as a shock to you, but there are those of us who buy our children one coat (and one pair of shoes, and one backpack, and one lunchbox, etc.) and need those items to last throughout the year.

Shame on you teachers for scolding this mom for being upset about this. What arrogance!

To the OP: yes, you should be upset. You asked and were told that this was washable paint. Obviously, it wasn't. I would talk to the principal and express my concerns about the organization of this activity. As you said, it shouldn't have been a surprise to the organizers that there was cold weather in your area on Halloween. The mural should have been done in the gym...or with chalk or other nonstaining medium. I would ask the school to cover the cost of having the coat professionally cleaned.

Is this a common request? No. But, I've been in your shoes. My older son came home from school one day when he was in 2nd grade with permanant paint all over a new pair of pants. The teachers hadn't given the parents any notice that there was going to be painting that day. Should parents have to send their children in old clothing every day just in case a teacher wants to paint? No.

It is the job of teachers and others who plan activities to use common sense. Parents need to be warned ahead of time about potentially messy activities.

Good luck with this...I hope your local cleaner can help solve the problem!

 

[arielsleepingbeauty]

I understamd that you are upset. I would be too. I buy my children 1 coat a year. I would never expect that the first week they wear it, that they would get paint on it. I hate the whole painting thing. i have had so many clothes ruined from so called washable paint. I think that the teacher should have warned that they woud be painting outside and to wear appropriate clothing. She could have sent a note home saying they were doing this. Of course school is not meant to be a fashion show, but I don't want my kids clothing new or old to be ruined. I count my pennies. If i knew ahead of time that my kids are going to get messy doing a school project, then i could really prepare them ahead of time. If they do it on their own by food or on the playground, well than that just is a part of life.
I wouldnt say anything to the school. I doubt it would get you anywhere

 

[3girls4me05]

I only read the first few replies because I'm dumbfounded! First, congrats to all of you who are weathly enough to have multiple coats for your children. This may come as a shock to you, but there are those of us who buy our children one coat (and one pair of shoes, and one backpack, and one lunchbox, etc.) and need those items to last throughout the year.

Shame on you teachers for scolding this mom for being upset about this. What arrogance!

To the OP: yes, you should be upset. You asked and were told that this was washable paint. Obviously, it wasn't. I would talk to the principal and express my concerns about the organization of this activity. As you said, it shouldn't have been a surprise to the organizers that there was cold weather in your area on Halloween. The mural should have been done in the gym...or with chalk or other nonstaining medium. I would ask the school to cover the cost of having the coat professionally cleaned.

Is this a common request? No. But, I've been in your shoes. My older son came home from school one day when he was in 2nd grade with permanant paint all over a new pair of pants. The teachers hadn't given the parents any notice that there was going to be painting that day. Should parents have to send their children in old clothing every day just in case a teacher wants to paint? No.

It is the job of teachers and others who plan activities to use common sense. Parents need to be warned ahead of time about potentially messy activities.

Good luck with this...I hope your local cleaner can help solve the problem!

I find your post well..not nice! I will address it point by point if I can.

First: I love how you just bunched teachers into being arrogant. I am going to shock you when I say this but most of us teachers are moms too! It is not arrogant to say that your child should come to school ready and dressed to learn. Sometimes that learning is going to get your child dirty. We will have smocks and remind them to roll up their sleeves but even still they may get dirty! Such is the life of a child. When you are home you have 1-6 or so kids to keep track of and keep clean. We have 18-30 or so. We do the best we can.

Second: The paint may be washable. That is generally what is used at schools. However the darker washable paints: blue, green, purple, black may require multiple washings and treatments before they come out entirely. I am confident this stain will lighten and come out if the OP washes it a few more times. (Hint: I soak in a strong solution of oxiclean overnight and then wash. Always comes out)

Third: You do realize that schools are funding by tax money right? I would not be happy for find out my tax dollars went to cleaning some child's coat. What a waste of valuable funds.

The teacher already admitted it was a mistake. Shockingly teachers are humans to and mistakes happen. From the nature of the event it sounds like the teacher wasn't even the one who planned the activity. I am sure that next year there will be no outside painting on Harvest day. So really what is going to the office going to accomplish?

 

[ajk912]

I only read the first few replies because I'm dumbfounded! First, congrats to all of you who are weathly enough to have multiple coats for your children. This may come as a shock to you, but there are those of us who buy our children one coat (and one pair of shoes, and one backpack, and one lunchbox, etc.) and need those items to last throughout the year.

Shame on you teachers for scolding this mom for being upset about this. What arrogance!

To the OP: yes, you should be upset. You asked and were told that this was washable paint. Obviously, it wasn't. I would talk to the principal and express my concerns about the organization of this activity. As you said, it shouldn't have been a surprise to the organizers that there was cold weather in your area on Halloween. The mural should have been done in the gym...or with chalk or other nonstaining medium. I would ask the school to cover the cost of having the coat professionally cleaned.

Is this a common request? No. But, I've been in your shoes. My older son came home from school one day when he was in 2nd grade with permanant paint all over a new pair of pants. The teachers hadn't given the parents any notice that there was going to be painting that day. Should parents have to send their children in old clothing every day just in case a teacher wants to paint? No.

It is the job of teachers and others who plan activities to use common sense. Parents need to be warned ahead of time about potentially messy activities.

Good luck with this...I hope your local cleaner can help solve the problem!

I just don't know what to say. Most schools are either non-profit or not making very much money. I doubt they have the budget to pay for cleaning for someone's coat. That is probably coming out of someone's pocket. The kids were having fun, it was an accident. I am not sure if I buy the "I am poor, we only get one coat/pair of shoes/etc a year" excuse because you are posting on a DISNEY forum so obviously you have the funds to pay for a computer, internet, and have probably taken a Disney vacation (and those aren't cheap). Getting all worked up over something so silly...really, a cleaning is what, $10? Getting all worked up over $10 isn't going to get you anywhere. A new coat (I don't know about LLBean ones, I never bought my kids one of those) an average winter coat is probably $50. Yeah, I would hate to have to buy a new coat..absolutely. But how does that saying go? If you don't like the way the kids learn here, feel free to teach your kid yourself.