Would you like a tour?

[JC Drake]

For all of you Miss Manners out there... Is it proper to offer someone a tour of your home when they visit for the first time? I have a bit of a problem with this, since I don't particularly enjoy touring someone else's home and I certainly don't want people touring mine. I have nothing to hide. My home is perfectly clean, I'm not growing weed, and there are no dead bodies in the closets. I just think of my home as being a private place (except for the parlor) and I don't like showing people around. I've had people ASK for a tour, which really annoys me. I just don't know if I'm being rude by not offering. Thoughts?

 

[MagicalMom]

I wonder too. I never offer tours of my home but a friend of mine gives a tour to everyone who enters her house.

 

[Fairy Dust]

Never heard of such a thing!

If someone was staying overnight I would show them where their bedroom and bathroom was, but thats about it.

 

[deekaypee]

For all of you Miss Manners out there... Is it proper to offer someone a tour of your home when they visit for the first time? I have a bit of a problem with this, since I don't particularly enjoy touring someone else's home and I certainly don't want people touring mine. I have nothing to hide. My home is perfectly clean, I'm not growing weed, and there are no dead bodies in the closets. I just think of my home as being a private place (except for the parlor) and I don't like showing people around. I've had people ASK for a tour, which really annoys me. I just don't know if I'm being rude by not offering. Thoughts?

No tours from this poster. But me, I'm trying to hide the dead bodies.

Seriously, you called out to me with the Miss Manners line. I actually think it's kind of strange to offer a tour for anything other than the bathroom (and the guest bedroom, if applicable). It might smack of materialism.

 

[azgal81]

Maybe if it's a housewarming party I can see why a tour would be offered. Since that's what the party is for. Family members have visited my house for the first time and asked for me to show them around. I don't offer a tour to anyone who comes over though. I guess if they asked I would offer but I'm not going to ask everyone who comes over hey you want a tour?

 

[mookie]

I agree - I don't like the tour, either....giving them OR getting them. I could understand showing the main areas - like where the bathroom is, etc. But tours of the bedroom? Why does anyone need to see someone elses bedroom? The only reason would be to snoop.

That said, I have given tours if we have redone our bedroom and I needed some decorating opinions, etc...but even then it's usually only to close friends.

 

[arielsleepingbeauty]

I have only asked peopel if they wanted to tour my home when we first moved in.Seeing as though the reason they came over was to see our house. I don't see any reason to give guests a tour unless they ask. My friends have asked, but that's different. I don't mind. We had my daughter's birthday party this weekend and had a house full of parents. I put everyone's coat in my bedroom and when it was time to leave people just went upstairs to get their coats. If they wanted to look around and see the upstairs that would have been fine with me. I enjoy touring people's homes. I like getting decorating ideas. I would never just wander in someone's house, but if it was someone I felt comfortable with I think it's ok to ask to see their home.

 

[Blondie]

I could never understand that. Every time we visit someone for the first time they want to give us a tour of their home. I could see if it was this newly built mansion, but the average home? I'm really not interested!

When some in-laws visited a few years ago my BIL said "how about the nickle tour Kath?" I was like WTH? We've lived here since 1994, there's nothing to see! But I obliged and showed them around. And you should've seen how my SIL was checking out the base of my toilet too! I guess she was seeing how clean I kept my home!

Last year a separate set of in-laws were going to stop here on their way to WDW. We were going to be out of town so it never happened. When I told my SIL via email our plans to be away, her wording was, and I quote "oh I wish you were going to be around, we really wanted to see your house."

Again I say...WTH? I guess they wanted to see if we had it better than they did, or vice versa?

 

[Rafiki Rafiki Rafiki]

I'm of the opinion that if your home has a particular interest to it--either it has a designer or is a showplace of sorts...or maybe it is an antebellum home...that people will have a natural interest in it.

If someone made a comment about my house and asked about it, I would certainly show it to them. However, I wouldn't ask for a tour of someone's house unless the owner showed some interest in showing it and wanted to offer a tour.

One other point. If someone was visiting my house and only knew me on a very superficial basis, I would be a bit offended if he/she asked for a tour. I might not invite the person over a second time.

 

[dreamcometrue]

we just moved into a brand new, big house, this past July! We had people come over and ask to see the whole house, and I have no problems showing them around. However, I never offered a tour. Not because of privacy issues or anything like that, I just feel like I am bragging if I do that! Like "come look at my nice, big new house", you know? I don't like that!

 

[LindaM]

Given tours no, unless I moved into a new home and your my mom...okay. A couple of years ago we moved to a new place and my dd (18) felt the need to show a couple of her friends our house...including my bedroom I advised her if she tried that again, I'll make sure her dad and I were...well you know

 

[Rafiki Rafiki Rafiki]

BTW, I'm curious about where in the US everyone lives who has posted to this thread.

I suspect that interest in homes/architecture/design is much more prevalent in the South. I think how you answer may depend on where you're from.

 

[LadyyRedd]

I like taking tours in others' houses because I love getting decorating ideas and color scheme ideas from them.

I would never ask for one though, unless it was a close family member or one of my absolute closest friends.

Kimya

ETA: I'm in MD.

 

[mookie]

I also once had a coworker of mine that was sooo nosy, that when she asked for the tour at our house, she started opening up every closet in every room!!!

Totally no need for that.

 

[ZuZugal]

For all of you Miss Manners out there... Is it proper to offer someone a tour of your home when they visit for the first time? I have a bit of a problem with this, since I don't particularly enjoy touring someone else's home and I certainly don't want people touring mine. I have nothing to hide. My home is perfectly clean, I'm not growing weed, and there are no dead bodies in the closets. I just think of my home as being a private place (except for the parlor) and I don't like showing people around. I've had people ASK for a tour, which really annoys me. I just don't know if I'm being rude by not offering. Thoughts?

Since your location states "a hut" I wouldn't think there would be much of a tour to offer to a visitor! Here are my four grass walls and I just had this great mud floor put in last week! (just being snarky.....couldn't help myself!)

 

[JC Drake]

Since your location states "a hut" I wouldn't think there would be much of a tour to offer to a visitor! Here are my four grass walls and I just had this great mud floor put in last week! (just being snarky.....couldn't help myself!)

Shhhh.... my walls are my weed crop that I don't want anyone to see.

 

[ZuZugal]

Shhhh.... my walls are my weed crop that I don't want anyone to see.

With such a small place you could always use the dead bodies for pillars you know. And after you guests take a "sniff or two" of the walls, they won't even notice the pillars any more!

 

[Michie]

We build a new house about every 4 years. My inlaws always ask and I tell them NO! Our house is our sanctuary!!

 

[caitycaity]

we gave everyone a tour who came to our housewarming party. we were just so excited to have our first house. i did the same thing when members of my imediate family came for the first time.

never thought other people might think of it as weird or rude.