Would you let your child(ren) go to WDW with someone else?

[torinsmom]

Say what? Her husband wouldn't even let her take the kids without him? Your sister and her husband are trippin seriously. I would like to hear someone say i couldn't take my kid, I am a whole lotta woman.

And the parents really have no desire to go, but don't want you to take them. They just dont want to look like losers in their kids' eyes, that is all.

With that said, I may be taking DD11's friend with us. Her DM has never taken her anywhere, she can afford to, but just doesn't.

How dare a parent not let their kid enjoy something because they can't or wont take them

Yeah, I don't get that, but she has said that numerous times. It made a little more sense when the kids were really young(one adult for each toddler/baby), but not at the age they are now.

I wouldn't let any of my kids go without me until they were at least 16. I don't mean this to be offensive, but no one loves my kids like I do, and no one will watch after them with my eagle eye. I trust them at the age of 16 to watch after themselves and use the judgement I have instilled in them.

Well, I trusted them to take my DS to the beach last year for 5 days, when I couldn't go. And they trusted me to watch their kids as babies/toddlers all day long. When I take them anywhere, I watch them better than I do my own son, because he is older.

My older two went on their first Disney trip without me. It was a tough decision, tougher than it should have been given how little it really means in the big-picture sense, but my in-laws wanted to take them, I couldn't get away to go with because I was maid of honor in a wedding that same week, and at the time DH & I didn't know if we'd ever afford to take them ourselves.

Could it be a matter of money rather than trust? A lot of people would feel a little uncomfortable/embarassed to have a relative give such an expensive gift to their kids. I know I'd feel a little odd if it had been one of our siblings rather than the spoiling grandparents offering to pay our kids' way on such an expensive vacation.

It isn't THAT expensive. We are already renting a condo(cheap), so no extra expense there. We are driving, so no extra there. I would be buying the Y.E.S. Disney tickets at $170 each as birthday/Christmas presents and paying for food. We are planning on Universal too, but would have cut that out if they came.

If I hadn't taken my child by the time they were 11 and 14 then yes, I sure would let someone else take them! Now if they were younger then I would want to do the whole first time at Disney thing with them but by 11 and 14 I would let someone else take them.
I took my godson at 3 to Disney without his mom and again 3 or 4 times more without her...we had such good times!

The kids have been. They went when they were 2 and 4 & then when they were 9 and 11.



I'm really trying not to take it personal. Her kids have asked us if they can come with us and I had to tell them that their parents said no. I don't want them to think we don't want them to come. They have no vacation planned, so camp may be it for them.

DS has no interest in bringing a friend and I wouldn't want to take someone I didn't know really well anyway. My nephews are both good kids and would not be a bit of trouble. SO right now it looks like me and DS. We do have a 3 bedroom condo booked, so maybe they will change their minds.(Probably not, because now we are staying 9 days)

Marsha

 

[luvmy3]

I wouldn't and let me tell you why. I love my SIL's and I trust them and my BIL's with my children, however I would be very uncomfortable with my children flying to WDW without dh or me and I would even more uncomfortable with them driving that long of a distance without dh or me. Its about control (not controlling their lives) but that I would feel a loss of control of the circumstances. I know its not very rational, but its just how I feel at this point. My dd is 12 and she has traveled with my SIL and stays with her for a week every summer so its not anything to do with trust. I also probably wouldn't tell my SIL that because I'd be a bit embarrassed that I did feel that way. Just another perspective on why she may not want them to go

 

[PatsGirl]

Yes, at 13 I'd allow DD to go with another family to WDW, in fact I'd allow her to go anywhere with a family that I trusted and knew well.

I've been taking other peoples' children with us on vacation since my first child was 5. We took a friends' son who was 7 with us camping for a week in Maine. Every year since then both kids could ask one friend to join us on vacation. Had they been closer in age I would not have done it but with nearly 8 years between them they weren't and still aren't very close.

Next week will be the first time in many years that DD and I will be going to WDW by ourselves. I am looking forward to it, she is a little ambivalent

 

[PixieTopaz]

I wouldn't and let me tell you why. I love my SIL's and I trust them and my BIL's with my children, however I would be very uncomfortable with my children flying to WDW without dh or I and I would even more uncomfortable with them driving that long of a distance without dh or I.

I agree with this . I would not allow it.

But then WE were the ones who always went on vacations, and my siblings not much or not at all-so I never faced this scenario.

Also it could be the fear of everyone oot there-not you. They are safe being with you at your house-but in a park with thousands of stangers-it would be hard to keep tabs on the 3 of them. Just my opinion.

 

[mjkacmom]

I would never be selfish enough to deny my children opportunties just because I couldn't go. Dd13 has vacationed with my SIL, ds11 is going to Cooperstown with his baseball team in June, dd13 is going to Hawaii with her choir next year, dd9 is going to WDW with her grandmother for dance nationals in July. Why would I make my kids miss out on things because I couldn't be there?

 

[MichelleVW]

I wouldnt let someone else take them on their first trip to the world but I would after that, I hope its not that they dont trust you...maybe they just want to be there and see them experience it

I wouldn't want to miss out on sharing the experience with my boys - now 14 & 16.

I personally would let them go, even for the first time because I don't think you should deny your children opportunities for selfish reasons. And just because you don't want them happy at Disney without you is pretty selfish.

I wouldn't let any of my kids go without me until they were at least 16. I don't mean this to be offensive, but no one loves my kids like I do, and no one will watch after them with my eagle eye. I trust them at the age of 16 to watch after themselves and use the judgement I have instilled in them.

You'd be surprised....I do love my nieces and nephews as much as I love my own children and would watch them just the same.

I would never be selfish enough to deny my children opportunties just because I couldn't go. Dd13 has vacationed with my SIL, ds11 is going to Cooperstown with his baseball team in June, dd13 is going to Hawaii with her choir next year, dd9 is going to WDW with her grandmother for dance nationals in July. Why would I make my kids miss out on things because I couldn't be there?

Exactly. My kids have been on plenty of vacations with friends/family when I couldn't go and on the flip side, I took a friend's DD on a few trips with us. She didn't go on many vacations and her mom was thrilled that I wanted to take her.

 

[taylor3297]

I would let my dd(7) and ds(3) go with my sisters and their families anywhere. Each of my sisters have raised great kids and I totally trust them with my children.

Now if it were my in-laws, that would be a different story.

 

[Hollywoodhaha]

I am going with my best friend and her family. I have known them since I was 10 and I am now 16. Her and I know WDW like our own home as we are both addicted to it. My family and hers has no problem with us going.

 

[RF536]

As long as I trusted the person(s) I wouldn't have a problem with it. DH's sister is taking our DS9 to FL for 2 weeks this summer, they will be driving, and while there they will be doing a week in Disney including the waterparks. They will also be visiting Gatorland, Bush Gardens, Sea World, and the ocean. In 2 years she will be taking our other son when he turns 9, as that is the youngest age she feels comfortable taking them.

She is single and doesn't have any children, she has always been very close to our kids, and we completely trust her to watch him. She has been taking day trips with both boys since they were potty trained.

 

[MM27]

I'm taking my niece to WDW next year over spring break, she's going to be 5 and it will be her very first trip. I don't have kids myself, but I can tell you that I love my niece very much and when I have her in my care I watch her just as carefully as her parents do.

 

[golfgal]

I wouldn't give it a second though, yes, I would let them go with a trusted family member or friend. I don't understand those that won't let their teenagers go places without them, why????

 

[torinsmom]

OP here. FWIW, I wouldn't let DS15 go with someone I don't know well, but if it was a family member or friend I knew and trusted, I would let him go, and would have since he was 10 or 11. Would I worry? Heck, yes! I worry when he is at his dad's or when he goes to the mall with a group of friends, even though I know he will most likely be fine. I just realize, he is a teenager and I have to let him go some now, or the world will be a big shock when he gets out of high school.

 

[disykat]

It's making me really uncomfortable that people seem to think it's okay to call parents selfish if they don't send their kids on a trip just because they're invited. Regardless of their reasons, they are the parent and it's their choice. It's okay to be disappointed or wish they made a different decision, but is it really okay to insist someone should send their kids to WDW or anywhere else they're invited and if they don't, they're selfish?

Unless they've been sending their kids regularly with other people, this decision has nothing to do with the OP. It's just a parenting decision they've made.

 

[SwiperFox]

I'm coming at this situation from the other side. I'm single and have no kids of my own, but used to work as a nanny. I'm still very close with the last family that I worked for.

My parents and I are going to Disney in June and I thought it would be fun to bring one of the kids along. Her parents have no problem with it and so my soon-to-be 10 year old former nanny charge is coming along with us. (I just realized that this makes me sound very young...lol... I'm 33.)

I think that all of these situations are different depending on the circumstances. I know this family very well and I know they trust me completely with their children. They see me as a part of their family and most likely consider see this as their daughter going with an aunt or similar.

I certainly don't see it as selfish if a parent doesn't want to send their child with someone else. A trip to Disney is a big deal! Like I said, circumstances are always different.

 

[torinsmom]

Just wanted to say that I (OP) never said it was selfish. I just said it made me feel like they don't trust me. It's obviously their choice and it is saving me a few hundred bucks, I guess. DS would have really enjoyed it though.

Marsha

 

[palmtreegirl]

No, we would't let our kids go without us on a trip.

 

[wdwfan16]

I would let a person I trusted take the kids, when they are old enough. I have also taken many kids to WDW with us.

 

[goofy!]

yup, I have and might be doing it again this summer.

Our best friends are like second parents to DS13. They have the options to travel way more than we do.

DS has been traveling with them for years now. Last fall it was Disney. This summer, there have been talks of Hawaii. They keep pestering me to get his passport updated so they can do Europe and Australia.

And I am sending him next spring break to DC with his 8th grade class.

My parents started putting me on a plane to the Netherlands when I was a preteen to stay the summer with relatives. I would stay with my grandmother, but aunts and uncles and cousins would take me on their summer holidays.

What a gift it was in my life. To this day I believe I was one of the luckiest kids to see and understand that the world is different than my hometown at such an early age.

I have great stories/memories of tasting my first champagne at the Moulin Rouge at age 14, having a crush on Prince Albert when visiting Monaco, getting food poisoning in Italy, being exposed to soccer mania during some playoff thing while in Nice and debating with cousins that soccer would overtake American football in popularity because it was so popular in Europe. I still have fun with this 30 years later that it never happened.

It never made me think my parents were losers that they were not there. Actually, it made me appreciate them more that they allowed me this opportunity.

Well, actually, as an older teen, I was po'd that I couldn't spend the summers with my friends, but now as an adult I appreciate it and them

However, I do feel it is each parent's decision and that each parent has their own very valid reasons why or why not they would allow their child to travel with somebody else.

 

[hereyago]

What a gift it was in my life. To this day I believe I was one of the luckiest kids to see and understand that the world is different than my hometown at such an early age.


It never made me think my parents were losers that they were not there. Actually, it made me appreciate them more that they allowed me this opportunity.

These points exactly!!!!!!!!! If you want to stay home or you have to stay home, why not let your kids go out and explore with people you trust?

Traveling to me is more then wee we get to go to WDW, we have met people from all over the world, and to me it teaches DD11 to be open minded about people and experiences.

I know a woman who's husband doesn't want to go anywhere, like not even to the local zoo to take their dd and now baby, but she will not go herself and take them. Her DD is9, hasn't even been to the local amusement park. WTH?! And its not a money thing, it's a I don't want to go from the husband and I dont have a back bone from the wife. But i am quite sure people have offered to take dD and they still say no.

I may be taking DD"s friend with us on an upcoming trip, but I would look after her as if she were my own, and I actually have her back, because her DM seems to have too much drama in her life that a child shouldn't be around.

What if you say no and you never end up taking your kids? Life is too short.

 

[krcit]

It's making me really uncomfortable that people seem to think it's okay to call parents selfish if they don't send their kids on a trip just because they're invited. Regardless of their reasons, they are the parent and it's their choice. It's okay to be disappointed or wish they made a different decision, but is it really okay to insist someone should send their kids to WDW or anywhere else they're invited and if they don't, they're selfish?

Unless they've been sending their kids regularly with other people, this decision has nothing to do with the OP. It's just a parenting decision they've made.

I agree. Another scenario to consider is the child. My oldest will be 15 in 2 weeks. She would not want to go away with another family including her aunt that lives around the corner from us. She just wouldn't be comfortable and I would gladly take the blame for not letting her go if she were embarrassed to say so. Now that being said, I have said no to a few offers to take my oldest away. One was my BIL/SIL wanted to take her camping..I was not comfortable with it. The people they were going with are major partiers and I think a bit lax with the childrens supervision so I said no. Another time her good friends mom offered to take her on a cruise with them b/c we weren't going. Nope, not at all comfortable with her flying to Fl and then being out at sea. For a number of reasons, what if she got sick? I would feel terrible that I wasn't there but also that she ruined another family's trip.It was a mute point because dd never would've went but I don't think I am selfish b/c I'm not comfortable with my kids traveling without me. Now she may change her tune that she is getting older and I think at this age I would be ok with her going but every situation is different.