Would you let your 4th grader go?

[gem21]

Yes, honestly I wouldn't even make a big deal of it... when I was in grade 4 my class went on a two night/three day camping trip.

What I can't believe is that more that 9 parents volunteered to go... here we're lucky if we can get 2-3!!

Can I ask what is your big worry? Is it that you don't trust the other parents? Do you know any of the other parents going? Could you talk to your daughters teacher to help ease your worries.

Just trying to help...

 

[Leajess99]

I would let her go. Shoot, my oldest went to Alabama for his 5th grade Farewell field trip and was gone for 3 days. My middle one has been on out of town, over night field trips as well. She is now 12.

 

[Magic Mom]

I would let her go. Shoot, my oldest went to Alabama for his 5th grade Farewell field trip and was gone for 3 days. My middle one has been on out of town, over night field trips as well. She is now 12.

My 11 yo started going to GS sleep away camp at the age of 7. I remember when we were driving away, she was sitting on a log with her cabin mates and counselor waiting to head down to the opening ceremonies. I made DH stop the car and roll down the window. I called out to her (holding back my tears to be strong for her). I told her she would be fine and have a wonderful time. I reassured her that her counselors would take care of her and I would be back in just 3 short days. She stood up and lifted her hand. I knew she was going to reach out for me to come back to her. She held out her little hand as if to tell me to "stop." She sighed and said "It's OK MOM......I'll be fine. You're embarrassing me. You can go now!"

DH laughed at me all the way home.

 

[*BTMRR*]

I consider myself a pretty protective (okay, maybe quasi-helicopter) parent, and I let my 4th grader go on what was nearly an identical field trip, without even a moment's hesitation. It didn't bother me a bit.

 

[mdsoccermom]

I absolutely would let my kid go. Once I put my kids in school, I put my trust in their teachers and officials to take care of them. I am assuming this is not the first time the school has conducted this field trip and they actually have an idea of what they are doing.

When I was in 5th grade, our whole class went on a 3 day camping trip. I can't remember any parents getting up in arms about that. When my daughter was in 1st grade and in Brownies, her troop went on an overnight to a children's museum 45 minutes away with other troops. I let her go and I refused to chaperone.

At what age are you willing to cut the cord?

 

[Elmo888]

I need some input because I am freaking out.

DD is 9 and in 4th grade. 1 week before we leave for Disney - not that the date really matters but just telling to give the whole picture- DD's entire 4th grade class of 60 students is scheduled to go on a field trip. They leave at 6am and get back at 8 pm. They will ride on a charter bus 400 miles roundtrip to visit our states capital. 3 teachers and 9 parents are getting to go. There was a lottery drawing for the 9 parent spots and I was not chosen.

No parents are allowed to go if they were not chosen. We have been warned that any parents that take the "it's a free country and I can follow the bus and meet them there attitude" will be asked to leave and risk being arrested. It is a private tour company doing the field trip and the group is being given special access - the cost is $80 a kid /chaperone!

I am really freaking out about DD being gone for 14 hours, out of town, riding a bus all without me our her Dad. I can honestly say there are only 6 people on this planet beside me and her Dad that I would allow to take her on a day trip like this - and not one of them is going on this trip. So do I let her go and pray for the best or trust my gut and say no way.

My DD did this last year. (Maybe we live in the same area, because I just Google mapped the trip and it was 430 miles round trip.) They left for Austin around 6:30 am and returned around 8:30 pm. She was 10 because it was in the spring of her 4th grade year. I knew one of the parents that went really well, and I knew that my DD wouldn't have had a problem talking to her if there was an issue. Maybe you can talk to one of the parents that is going and make an effort to get to know them just for this reason. (And there was really no way that I could have gone because my younger DD was in preschool last year.)

I also was a tad more comfortable because my sister works at the capitol and my parents live in a town near Austin. I don't think that this actually mattered in reality, but it just made me feel better.

The charter bus made me more comfortable (ie not a school bus), and the kids stayed with the adults in small groups (4 or 5 kids per adult - I can't remember). It is nerve racking - no doubt - and a really long day for me. She had a blast, esp. on the trip back. It was her first time being away from parents for so long and being with peers for so long. I wouldn't not let her go because you are worried. I found that my DD learned a lot, and I don't mean necessarily education-wise. I mean confidence-wise.

One thing that was interesting and helps account for the time is that the bus driver is required to get a 30 minute break. This worked well for the trip back (they stopped at a buffet pizza place for dinner), but the 30 minutes was also included on the trip to Austin in the morning.

This is all very foreign to me, too. I grew up in Austin, so we didn't have to go very far for Texas history, including a trip to the Alamo.

Please PM me if you would like.

 

[mom2val]

Can I ask what is your big worry? Is it that you don't trust the other parents? Do you know any of the other parents going? Could you talk to your daughters teacher to help ease your worries.

Just trying to help...

No I do not know any of the parents chosen. This is only the 2nd year for our school to be open. Students came from 2 different schools to form this new school. We built a new home and only moved into the area 2 months before the school opened so we knew noone. My dd is not the kind of kid that rolls with the punches or goes with the flow. She's the kid that has to know 2 days in advance everything that you are going to do and freaks if anything changes. Shes the kid that completely lost it at school bc the cafeteria changed the way the tables are set up this year compared to last year.

 

[cathyce2]

I would definitely let my children go and they are 11 and 6. It sounds like a great experience. I'm sorry, but I just don't see any reason to "freak out". Exactly what are you afraid of? She will be supervised by teachers, parents who have been background checked and experienced tour guides.

 

[Magic Mom]

No I do not know any of the parents chosen. This is only the 2nd year for our school to be open. Students came from 2 different schools to form this new school. We built a new home and only moved into the area 2 months before the school opened so we knew noone. My dd is not the kind of kid that rolls with the punches or goes with the flow. She's the kid that has to know 2 days in advance everything that you are going to do and freaks if anything changes. Shes the kid that completely lost it at school bc the cafeteria changed the way the tables are set up this year compared to last year.

Maybe this will be a good controlled way for her to gain more confidence in uncertain situations. Let her teacher know ( although I'm guessing they already have an idea) of her reaction to change and ask them to watch out for that and give her extra reassurance if there are any "bumps in the road."

 

[mom2val]

I would definitely let my children go and they are 11 and 6. It sounds like a great experience. I'm sorry, but I just don't see any reason to "freak out". Exactly what are you afraid of? She will be supervised by teachers, parents who have been background checked and experienced tour guides.

I am afraid of her being over 3 hours away in case of an accident. I am afraid of dd freaking out and basically noone giving a damn except to be annoyed about the 1 kid crying and not able to "go with the program". I don't exactly get warm fuzzy feelings from the 3 teachers that are going.

 

[Elmo888]

Maybe this will be a good controlled way for her to gain more confidence in uncertain situations. Let her teacher know ( although I'm guessing they already have an idea) of her reaction to change and ask them to watch out for that and give her extra reassurance if there are any "bumps in the road."

I tend to agree. I feel like this happened to my daughter on her Austin field trip (see earlier post) or maybe she had the confidence, but just didn't have an opportunity to show it until the trip.

 

[DCbride]

When my older kids were in 4th grade they attended a 3 day/2 night environmental field trip with their entire grade. Parents were allowed to sign up for 1 twelve hour chaperone time. They went and both loved it.

I teach grade 5 and for the past 10 years have taken my students on an overnight leadership camp trip. All parents are invited, but usually only have a few attend. Over the years, I have only had 3 kids out of about 200 not attend the trip.

I understand your concerns, but part of your child's education should be about providing experiences and field trips are great experiences!

And most trips in this area range from $50 to $75 per person child or adult.

 

[hsembrick]

I understand all of your concerns and I would probably let my DS go. Maybe if you talk to her about the trip you could see what she thinks about the trip and maybe help her through some of her anxiety.

I am so sorry to hear that you aren't feeling great about her teachers, being in a new school is hard and I hope that you will find a support system of parents in your school.

Does your daughter go to a private school? The expense of the trip is a little steep IMO. My kiddos take field trips around town but our school pays for them. There are just to many kids in our district that could not afford to pay for the trip.

 

[mom2val]

I understand all of your concerns and I would probably let my DS go. Maybe if you talk to her about the trip you could see what she thinks about the trip and maybe help her through some of her anxiety.

I am so sorry to hear that you aren't feeling great about her teachers, being in a new school is hard and I hope that you will find a support system of parents in your school.

Does your daughter go to a private school? The expense of the trip is a little steep IMO. My kiddos take field trips around town but our school pays for them. There are just to many kids in our district that could not afford to pay for the trip.

No we are not at a private school in fact we are rumored to be Title 1 after this year. There are lots of parents freaking about cost. Last year only about half the parents paid and the school and pta covered those that did not pay.


sidenote for Hsembrick I grew up in CS on Francis Drive. The only field trips I remember as a kid were touring A&M and having a picnic at Bee Creek or Thomas Park.

 

[robinb]

I'm writing without reading what others have said. I would probably feel a *little* nervous about sending my DD 2 hours each way when she was 9. BUT this seems like there are plenty of chaperons and a field trip that all of the 4th graders take. I would definitely send my child on the field trip. My DD went on a weekend camping/caving trip when she was in 4th grade and she had a blast.

 

[hsembrick]

sidenote for Hsembrick I grew up in CS on Francis Drive. The only field trips I remember as a kid were touring A&M and having a picnic at Bee Creek or Thomas Park.

My kids take field trips to A&M all the time!! Last year in 3rd grade they went to Washington on the Brazos. But never as far as Austin. Too funny that you used to live here.

We actually live in Bryan and their is no way the PTO could afford all the kids that couldn't afford it.

 

[mamaLori05]

yes, I would let my child go. I also totally understand them not wanting parents following the bus. It's easier to keep track of smaller groups, and they most likely ran background checks on all the chaperones.

The 4th graders at our school go 3 hours away to a 3 day 2 night camp. By 4th grade, they need to start doing some things on their own without mommy and daddy by their side. Your child will be supervised and most likely put in a small group with one chaperone, and I'm positive they will care. I know it is hard to watch your child grow up, but it's in your child's best interest if you let them. If you don't make a big deal of it and encourage the excitement of the trip, I'm sure your child will have a wonderful time. Also, don't stress about what COULD happen, you'll only drive yourself nuts. Focus on the great learning opportunity and the fun she will have.

 

[Hannathy]

I would let mine go without a second thought! In fact I was very excited mine was lucky enough to go a great trip kinda like yours, same deal went to Chicago which is 4 hrs away, took a couple great tours that are hard to schedule on our own left at 5 AM and got back about 8-9. Hard to remember it was several yrs ago. It is trips like this that build independence in children and give them the confidence to handle themselves. It won"t be that many more yrs Mom until she wants to go to Disney with the band or Italy with the orchestra. You don't want her undertaking a big trip like that without ever spreading her wings a bit with the smaller ones.

I applaud the school for putting their foot down about the parents. All extra parents do is disrupt the groups and think their snowflake is more special and it is OK if I buy just them hot choc. from the concession stand while we wait on the bus. (actually had that happen on a trip) Kids do much better all ways around with out parent hovering.

Let her go, you can't keep her in a cocoon forever.

 

[Cooky]

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[sunnyday123]

OP, I would be very hesitant to send my DD on this trip,at that age. Especially if I was not allowed to go, and didn't know the other parents attending.

When DD was born, she wasn't breathing. They worked on her for what seemed like forever, and called in some hospital counselors because they honestly didn't think she would make it. Then they told me she could have brain damage-it could be severe, minor or none. ( Thank God she's fine) So yea, I'm a little protective. My kid, my rules.

I worry, and I'm a little bit controlling-not in a bad way, but in a "if I go then this won't happen" kind of way. Do what you feel is right for you and you DD. Some things I can let go, some I can't.