Would this bother you

[Rora]

Yes, it would bother me. I tell him everything, he tells me everything. Paying a ticket comes out of both of our pockets.

 

[Acklander]

Nope, wouldn't bother me, I would just assume he forgot about it. A speeding ticket is not the end of the world, and not worth getting excited about, but we're both very easy going that way.

 

[MerMom60_94]

Generally no, but I suppose it would depend upon whether he purposely was hiding something or just didn't get around to telling me. DH and I can be two ships passing in the night so when we finally do sit down and talk this might not be high on the list of things that need to be talked about. I know how my DH is and there have been a couple of times he has "confessed" things to me because he thought they were a big deal and to me they weren't even worth a mention. If he thought I would care, I am sure he would tell me. Really though, if he told me I'd just tell him it serves him right for driving so fast.

 

[eliza61]

If your spouse got a speeding ticket and didn't tell you

Probably not. If he got a ticket for goin 30 miles in a 25 miles ph zone, that's an easy thing to do. Pay the ticket move on. I got a parking ticket a couple of weeks ago, it didn't even cross my mind to mention it. If he was getting multiple tickets and my rates are going up... problem.

We've been married 23 years now, so we don't feel the need to tell each other every minute detail of our day like we did when we were newlymarried and in our twenties. LoL. I trust him to be responsible.

 

[AlleyKat]

No!

 

[mrs_hower726]

Yep, it would bother me. I would definetely be more upset at him hiding something (especially something as minor as a speeding ticket), it would make me wonder what else he is hiding from me.

 

[TanyaLovesPooh]

Yep, it would bother me. I would definetely be more upset at him hiding something (especially something as minor as a speeding ticket), it would make me wonder what else he is hiding from me.

ITA.

 

[chicagodisneyfan]

Yeah, it would bother me. What's the point of being married if you don't share your lives? Also, since you'd have to pay the ticket, we would need to discuss the money aspect too.

It could be considered a lie of omission if the expecatation between a couple would ordinarily have been to tell each other these things.

Sharing your lives? You tell your spouse everything that happens to you? Really?

As for the money aspect around here a typical moving violation is only $100. If we have to "discuss" the money aspect - we have WAY bigger problems than the speeding ticket.

 

[chicagodisneyfan]

Yep, it would bother me. I would definetely be more upset at him hiding something (especially something as minor as a speeding ticket), it would make me wonder what else he is hiding from me.

If it is so minor - why does he have to bring it up?

 

[Keli]

I wouldn't care which totally surprises me.
I only know this because my dh didn't tell me about a ticket once. He mailed in the fee and I didn't find out about the whole thing until after the fact.
I would have sworn I'd have been upset about him not telling me and about the money and insurance, the whole bit.
But turns out I didn't care at all. It helped that he worked a little extra at work so we didn't miss the money and I was just glad it was taken care of so I wouldn't have to worry about it. Plus, for whatever reason our insurance didn't go up.

 

[pearlieq]

Sharing your lives? You tell your spouse everything that happens to you? Really?

As for the money aspect around here a typical moving violation is only $100. If we have to "discuss" the money aspect - we have WAY bigger problems than the speeding ticket.

I'll refrain from sharing that I just scratched my ear and shifted position in my chair, but yeah, I think getting a ticket is big enough to make our radar. How many tickets to do you get for this to be a non-issue???

And yes, we budget our money and have plans for it. If $100 is coming out unexpectedly, we need to figure out where it's coming from. Frankly, for us, hundred dollar chunks of money going missing willy-nilly would be a WAY bigger problem than a speeding ticket.

You do what works for you, we'll do what works for us. I was just offering my reaction to the OP's question.

 

[ginna74]

Sharing your lives? You tell your spouse everything that happens to you? Really?

As for the money aspect around here a typical moving violation is only $100. If we have to "discuss" the money aspect - we have WAY bigger problems than the speeding ticket.

Are you talking about not sharing financial responsibilies??? Lying aside I couldn't see being married as long as I have and be living like roomates. We pool everything together and share everything that is how our marriage works. So I hope I am mistaken, which I am often.

 

[Darsa]

Sharing your lives? You tell your spouse everything that happens to you? Really?

Absolutely! Is that not normal?

 

[chicagodisneyfan]

Are you talking about not sharing financial responsibilies??? Lying aside I couldn't see being married as long as I have and be living like roomates. We pool everything together and share everything that is how our marriage works. So I hope I am mistaken, which I am often.

Talking about the fact that if we have to "discuss" a mere $100 then we have HUGE financial issues.

So yeah, that would be a bigger problem that a speeding ticket.

We share financial info - but if he buys a new car and he pays for it - why would I need to know? (yes I did come home one day to a new Mustang in the garage)

 

[mrs_hower726]

If it is so minor - why does he have to bring it up?

I understand what you are saying, but my way of thinking is why not? We are very open in our relationship and not to mention something like this would be wierd.

 

[chicagodisneyfan]

Absolutely! Is that not normal?

I talk about major stuff, current events, news, what we want to do this weekend etc.

But I do not tell him every little thing I did at work, or that I hit a huge pothole, or that I got a ticket for running a stop sign. Now if it was "news-worthy" I would tell him - like if I was stopped by a transvestite cop.

Otherwise we have more fun things to talk about.

 

[tonilea]

My spouse did get angry because he thought I got a ticket and didn't tell him. I got a warning, but some of our co-workers thought it would be funny to tell him that I actually got a ticket.

 

[pearlieq]

To each his own, I guess.

I wouldn't want to be in a marriage where "Hey, I got a ticket today" just wasn't exciting enough for my husband to care about. I love coming home to a man who would respond "Oh, I'm sorry. That sucks."

Nor would I want one where we have "his money" and "my money". We're a team. The money that comes in is "our" money and so we coordinate with each other about where it goes.

 

[Mandychelle79]

Yes I would be mad as the car insurance is one of the bills that come out of my account. If he had his own insurance, i wouldnt care.

 

[Darsa]

$100 is a significant amount of money for us; I am glad that it is not the same for you.