Worried about Pre-school

[bwilcox]

Children with autism are on a spectrum-some more severe, some much less. Please don't rule it out just because your daughter doesn't exhibit extreme symptoms. It is also entirely possible that she doesn't have that, but I want to encourage you not to rule it out as a possibility just because your son didn't have it. With autistic kids, the sooner they get the help they need, the better they tend to do. Chances are, it is something else, or maybe you do just have a really hyper child, but as a former preschool special ed. teacher, many of the things you wrote about set off alarms in my head. If you are going to a general practitioner, make sure you tell him all of the symptoms you wrote about. Best of luck!

 

[tadamom]

I ditto what others have said. I would get her evaluated. In preparation, I would keep a food log of everything she eats, I would keep a chart of sleep activity and a chart of her behavior. It might help when you are able to get her evaluated.

Good luck!

 

[Shelly888]

you might also want to cut wheat out of her diet. I know she basically lives on it and fruit, but I would try a 10-14 day complete elimination and see if there is a difference. You have gotten some great advice.

 

[RainbowBrite]

I have been a nanny for almost 10 years. I've also worked in a daycare and have cared for 30+ children. Please, please take your DD to be evaluated.

 

[MarriedToAPrince]

I have agree that I think it is time for an evaluation. That is not normal behavior IMO. My DD will be 3 the end of September and she starts preschool August 30th. She is fully verbal, meaning there isn't a whole lot that we don't understand. She is fully potty trained, night and day. She does sit still when needed and you can hold her attention. She is every bit the typical almost 3 year old.

 

[maznorm]

Hi,

Thank you all for the replies so far. I almost didn't mention the speech thing because I knew people would pick up on it and, sort of, base their opinions on that, which I wanted to avoid if possible. I am concerned about her speech but kids in my side of the family generally start talking late. Not talking until 3, 4 or even 5 years old is pretty common in our family so I haven't really been considering an issue other than trying to give extra help with it.

My main concern is her energy levels, lack of concentration and sleep issues. I really don't want her speech to become the main issue here when it doesn't need to be, especially because we went down this route with DS.

If you put the speech issue aside, do we still need to be as concerned as seems to be the general consensus? I really am trying not to jump to any conclusions here without considering every issue seperately.

 

[squirrel]

If you put the speech issue aside, do we still need to be as concerned as seems to be the general consensus? I really am trying not to jump to any conclusions here without considering every issue seperately.

Yes, I would still get her evaluated. The amount of time she is awake and full of energy is way above any child I have ever seen. I know some children don't sleep much, but they aren't bouncing off the walls.

I do think you should keep a food diary. Make notes of her sleep along with it. There could be some pattern. Really check the labels of the food. It could be something like food dye/coloring.

Wouldn't you rather find out now while she is young if there is a problem? If there isn't one-great you feel better.

For months we tried to find out what was wrong with my niece. She had blood taken, urine samples, stool samples all sent in for testing. Finally, months later (about 6) we find out she is lactose intollerant. The poor kid was suffering with bloated stomach, vomiting, fluxuating weight, etc. for months.

 

[gr8mommy]

Hi,

Thank you all for the replies so far. I almost didn't mention the speech thing because I knew people would pick up on it and, sort of, base their opinions on that, which I wanted to avoid if possible. I am concerned about her speech but kids in my side of the family generally start talking late. Not talking until 3, 4 or even 5 years old is pretty common in our family so I haven't really been considering an issue other than trying to give extra help with it.

My main concern is her energy levels, lack of concentration and sleep issues. I really don't want her speech to become the main issue here when it doesn't need to be, especially because we went down this route with DS.

If you put the speech issue aside, do we still need to be as concerned as seems to be the general consensus? I really am trying not to jump to any conclusions here without considering every issue seperately.

Yes. And, actually, the fact that extremely delayed speech seems to run in the family makes it more important to get her evaluated.

 

[MyDizneyBoyz]

There is ZERO downside to having her evaluated.

If there's an issue, she'll get the help she needs.

If there's no issue, you may still get some feedback and suggestions on how better to manage her behavior and energy levels.

It simply can't hurt.

 

[Piper]

Speech and lack of affection is not the only criteria for a diagnosis of autism. I have taught some children that were very verbal--some who would give hugs when asked--some who were at the genius level of IQ--some who were much lower.

Autism is a spectrum--ranging from very mild to more severe. There is also sensory processing disorder, ADHD, non-verbal learning disorder, etc. Please have her evaluated by a developmental pediatrician or psychologist. I had one student come into our program at 2 years 10 months having constant meltdowns, non-verbal, lots of sensory issues and left at the end of Pre-K reading, much better able to manage his emotions and able to tell when he had too much sensory input. He went into a regular Kindergarten with support. He is now in 5th grade and thriving.

 

[Kriii]

By no means can anyone diagnose your child by the internet but I definately agree with having an evaluation done. I'm a speech path and am concerned by the information you have given about language development, amongst other things. I'm not picking on you but I am concerned about your comment that you haven't consulted an SLP since you "knew what to do" because of your other child's speech therapy experience. Your children may very well have completely separate issues requiring different therapy approaches. Speech therapy can be very individualized and you really need professional guidance in these cases . Talking at 3,4,5 is not typical even if it is a family trait. You sound like a very loving and concerned mother and I hope you get the answers you are seeking. Good luck.

 

[kimmylaj]

hi, i am a preschool teacher of 3 year olds. i do not want to diagnose your daughter (i wouldnt if she was in my class so i certainly wouldnt over the internet) but i would tell a parent in my class who was experiencing the same issues to get an evaluation. there was a girl in my class this year who was in constant motion , seriously could not sit still for 3 minutes. she was one of the younger ones in the class so we gave it a couple of months nothing changed. she had a large vocabulary and was able to understand and follow 1 step directions ( get your coat please) but was difficult to understand. i recommended an evaluation primarily because of her lack of focus, constant motion, and need to touch everything she passed. she also had many meltdowns when things did not go her way. she received a diagnosis of sensory processing disorder. she is a sensory seeker , she benefits from jumping on the trampoline, swinging in a swing, going in a ball pit, swimming. she received occupational therapy, a special education itinerant teacher who accompanied her 2 hours a day at our preschool and speech and family counseling. this year she is going to a special ed preschool as to streamline her services. i cannot say enough about the benefit of early intervention so many of my kids from 10 years ago come back to visit with their sibling and have made remarkable strides thanks to multiple interventions. after having an evaluation you will say one of two things. thank goodness we had her evaluated now we know there is nothing to worry about or thank goodness we had her evaluated , we can start receiving the services she needs and allow her to move up and hopefully catch up to her peers by kindergarten or first grade. it is truly important and yes i would do it with or without the speech issue, actually when i first read thru i did not even notice anything about speech until another poster mentioned it and i thought eval before then. good luck and hugs to you

 

[FloridaPixie]

I just wanted to encourage you to have your little daughter evaluated as well. I was wondering if you have ever discussed her behavior and your concerns with her doctor? Did your doctor offer any sort of advice or suggest evaluation?

I also do not want to scare you in any way, only encourage you get the ball rolling so that, just in case your daughter can benefit from help, that she can begin getting it as soon as possible.

A neigbor's son, who was just a little under a year older than my daughter (who is now 4 1/2) was diagnosed with Asperger's 1 1/2 years ago after exhibiting symtoms somewhat similar to your daughter. We would often meet for playdates when my daughter was 2 and he was 3, and my friend would ask me about my daughter's behavior, and if I thought her son seemed to be behaving differently. It was apparent watching the two of them play that something was just not the same with him.

He still has a very hard time sleeping, and will only go to sleep if my girlfriend is holding him. He gets up a lot throughout the night. However, my friend totally changed her son's diet (very natural, no sugar) and he is in preschool now and doing fairly well with the structure it offers.

I wish you the best of luck with your precious girl and hope that everything works out for you and your family.

 

[ClaireW]

I know you've had a lot of people already suggest getting an evaluation and I'd agree with that too, just as a starting point. I'm from the UK and a primary school teacher.
Before being a SAHM I taught a Reception class and would urge you at least to get some support (via your HV) to find a pre-school which is well suited to your child's needs. Regardless of any potential diagnosis I think that finding some good pre-school provision, with caring, well-trained and understanding professionals will be fundamental for everyone's continued health and happiness. Finding the right pre-school can take time, always trust your instincts and take advice from the HVs, speech therapists, etc as well.
My philosophy (as a class teacher and as the school's special needs co-ordinator) was that we would do our upmost to support the child's needs, regardless of any 'label' but taking the individual as our starting point and moving on from there. If someone at pre-school was thinking the same way this would be much better for you all than waiting until school age, as there are plenty of systems in place to observe, assess and seek support/early intervention. And certainly in our county this is where the emphasis lay; not in trying to establish a diagnosis.
A long, but hopefully supportive response. All the best

 

[cydswipe]

Please ask for an evaluation....

I'm not trying to be harsh and mean in this post.

There are 10 grandchildren in my parents' family. 2 of the dear grandchildren have special needs... one with autism and the other with a muscle/neuro disorder...

In both situations, my siblings were/are in DENIAL. One parent is even a pediatric intensive care nurse and her child went years without early intervention. There are numerous conversations w/ out these parents around about how
"they can't see it" (the problem, that is... denial)

People (myself included) tried talking w/ each sibling... oh the excuses and stories, and explanations went on and on. No one could get thru to the parents. Soon enough, school for the one nephew. All of a sudden, the teachers were wrong, the pricipal was a jerk...

Can you see the trend here?

I've read every post.

You are getting honest, unbiased advice here. People are being gentle and kind. Your posts seem, well, like denial. No one in my family was able to get their words, "you are in denial" out to either of my siblings. Now seeing these children, I would rather have my siblings hating me for being upfront and honest about their denial years ago. Early intervention is KEY.

So I will be the bad guy and say it. You are making excuses for your child. The behavior is not "normal". You are in denial.

Please, please, please set something up THIS WEEK. Start the process.

Maybe I am just crazy and I would LOVE TO BE WRONG. Find out, for your daughter's future, what is going on in her precious brain. It may be nothing. You will sleep much better knowing you put your best foot forward for her while she was small.

10 years from now, this may be a silly memory. It also could be the most important post you ever made on a message board!

Tons of positive thoughts for you and your family. to you and your family.....

 

[ekatiel]

Please have her evaluated ASAP. Her behavior (even without the speech issue) is not normal. The earlier she gets intervention, the better off she will be in the long run. Children who are diagnosed early (no matter what the diagnosis is-- austism, sensory processing disorder, etc) and get early intervention do MUCH better than children who do not receive early intervention. Sometimes the difference is being able to live a "normal", productive adult life versus NOT being able to lead a normal, productive adult life. PLEASE have her evaluated ASAP. What could it hurt?? --Katie

 

[Mkrop]

Another though is sensory processing disorder.

My DD is 4 1/2, she sounds just like your DD except she sleeps more. Some of the reason she sleeps more is we have learned ways that work for her. For me to get her asleep I hold her still until she falls asleep, if I let her get herself to sleep it takes her hours.

Also most kids with Autism have some degree of SPD, but not every child with SPD has autism. SPD also shows up a lot in children with ADHD.

http://www.sensory-processing-disorder.com/ has a checklist.

I would never say she has this, but it is a thought, and if it is SPD an OT can help you find things to help calm her. As for swimming we even thought of using Aqua therapy with out DD for OT.

I hope you can find some answers before preschool.

See bolded.

Get your DD evaluated, not evey child has autism but she may have something else that with early intervention can help.

DS7 had SPD but is not autistic. He was not hyper but did not sleep well at all. Finally solved this with therapy from the occupational therapists. Got rid of nightlights and used a heavy waffle weave blanket to weigh him down sleeping. He has now recently been diagnosised with ADD, no H at all!

So my point is that there could be other concerns with your DD even if autism is ruled out.

What does the doctor say when you go for regular checkups?

 

[Alesia]

If you put the speech issue aside, do we still need to be as concerned as seems to be the general consensus? I really am trying not to jump to any conclusions here without considering every issue seperately.

Absolutely!

I don't want to be harsh, but you need to put everything else aside and help your daughter. Today. Clearly, something serious is going on and every day that you spend in denial is a day that you aren't getting your daughter the help that she needs. The longer you put it off, the harder it will be to get these issues under control.

 

[MomofSixinSC]

I can't reccomend the Feingold program to you highly enough.

basically, much of the food we eat has petrolwum in it. it is artificial flavors, artifical flavors, and most preservatives. They can cause neurological changes in children (and adults). Some are much more sensitive to it than others. They lose self control and move almost constantly. This was my ds. When he was in utero, we called him Pele because he kicked me so much (Brazilian soccer star from the 80's). At 4yo, he was kicked out of Sunday School! In desparation, I tried the Feingold Program. After 6 weeks, the difference was amazing. He sat still. he learend to write his name. And husband got a promotionand a raise. Turns out he was sensitive to petroleum as well.

You can read more at http://www.feingold.org/ and feel free to pm me any questions you may have.

 

[jodifla]

I agree that it would be best for your daughter to have an evaluation.

Please be sure that whoever does it does a DIFFERENTIAL evaluation. This puts ALL dxes on the table, not just autism. Many children are being Dxed with autism off of checklists, which have a huge false positive rate.

A correct label can really put you on the right track. A wrong label can have you spending your money and your daughter's life in fruitless therapies.

I also suggest you look closely at another Dx....Mixed Expressive Receptive Language Disorder. This is right in the DSM-IV, but it is often misdiagnosed as autism.

Here's a good definition.

http://www.minddisorders.com/Kau-Nu/Mixed-receptive-expressive-language-disorder.html

And note the part where 30 percent to 60 percent also seem to present with ADD.

For a board about late talkers, you can visit www.naturallatetalkers.com. We even have some UK folks over there.