Why we want to loose weight????

[wiskband]

As I read dr.phil's book, it really made me start seriously thinking WHY I want to loose weight. We find ourselves telling ourselves and even more so telling others that you want to have to loose the weight for YOU and no one else. I have to say this is some what true but this (for me anyway) stems from others. For example, my husband does has NEVER mentioned my weight in any negative way but I find myself saying I want to be more desirable FOR HIM. All of my friends are thin and good looking and I cant help but wonder if and how my husband sees them. So although, some may say you can;t loose weight for your husband, I say I CAN!! Ultimately, it's really for me. When I attach a feeling to it ( as Dr. Phil states) it would make me really fell good to know my husband looks at me with desire. Another example is, one time at a waterpark my very good friend made a comment that I looked like a truckdriver (because no one not even her, has ever seen my in a bathing suit) I happen to be wearing a tank top of which I NEVER ever wear. I know you may be thinking thats a horrible thing to say but I should point out that both me and her are very goofy. She is very skinny and I have made fun of her. I defintiely dont think she meant to hurt my feelings, we are just so close and have so much fun together we both do anything for a laugh , anything goes. Anyway this was about 4 years ago and the comment still bothers me. NO........I am not gonna tell her this but it's comments like that, that I think may help me achieve my goal in losing weight. I don;t want to look like a "truckdriver", so am I loosing the weight because of friend? NO.... I don't want people to veiw me or associate me with any term like that.
What I'm saying is although we are trying to loose the weight for ourselves ultimately, we can use the impact of those around us in aiding us how others may see us. Ultimately, we like to think and even moreso saying it out loud that "I dont care what people think about me" I think we really do.

JUST MY 2 CENTS.............

Wisband

 

[WDWLVR]

I have found that my determination to lose the weight I have is definately for me. If it wasn't I wouldn't be successful. I'm tired of walking into stores and having to go to the Women's department where they only have 1/10th the selection they have for those in smaller sizes. I'm tired of feeling big and out of shape.

My DH has been very supportive of me and that helps with the motivation, but I'm not doing it for him, I'm doing it for me.

It reminds me of when my MIL was trying to stop smoking. My FIL would bug her every day and I told him that she can only stop when she's ready. Until that time no pill, patch, or anything else is going to help. I feel the same way about this. Until I was ready to make the commitment 2 weeks ago it wouldn't have done any good. Now I feel great and think that this is something I can live with for life.

 

[tlgoblue]

I want to lose weight because I don't want to gain any more. And judging from my past history, the only way I can see doing that is to change my eating habits and physical activity level, so I can be fit. Well, in order to do that, I need to get to a place physically where I'm not tired from walking up the stairs, and I can comfortably pass up garbage. That takes practice and in so doing, I will lose some weight, change some bad habits, and become a participant of life, not just an observer.

Some perks:
DH can't keep his hands off me lately. (Yeah, they never criticize, and are always telling us how beautiful we are, but bottom line is, (and i've been there before) they do look at you in a whole new way! )
My posture is improving.
My back isn't as sore.
My knees aren't as sore.
My kids aren't embarrassed.
People take me more seriously. (sad, but true)

I could keep going. Not trying to be poopy here, and hoping not to offend anyone, but I wonder why we don't lose weight. What causes us to put ourselves through this type of discrimination and be ok with it? I'm hoping that I learn a few things about other demons I have conveniently allowed to set up shop inside my cranium, besides the the fat monster. It is, for me about more than losing weight. It has become an introspective journey. Sometimes painful and other times, very liberating.

And I have attached a feeling with my goal! AH! Success! How sweet it is. (will be! )

Keep the Faith!
Tracy

 

[JustMe28]

Wiskband,

This is a great thread. Very well said. I totally agree.

We usually say that we want to lose weight for ourselves, and while this is true, there's so many more reasons. Some reasons may be stronger than simply saying we want to for ourselves. Like you said about your husband never had said anything about your weight, I, like you, want my husband to find me more desirable and sexy. He has never said anything negative about my weight but how cool would it to be to know for a fact that he is loving what he sees -- a sexy, healthy wife. Another reason I want to lose weight and one of the major reasons for me, I want to set a good example for my daughters. They are so much like me and my oldest is shaped exactly like me. I don't want them to fall into this whole yo-yo dieting. I want them to have healthy bodies and not worry about being overweight. Also, I don't want them to be embarrassed of me, which I wonder if they are, since they do have a fat mom. I could go on and on about this. I could tell you about how I'm sick of my dang panties rolling down at the top because of my stomach, or how I'm sick of buying fat clothes. But, I think ultimately, I want to lose the weight because of how others do view me being the mother of my children.


Thanks for starting this thread. I think it's something good to think about.

 

[CALIFLADY]

I certainly do it for my own self esteem. But I also know (from experience over the years) that I get a lot more professional respect as a woman engineer when I'm lean and mean than when I'm chunky and round. It's hard to explain, but I think I'm taken more seriously and asked to do more important work when I'm thin. I know this sounds like discrimination, but it's a well known fact that thin people make better "first impressions" than big people.

I also do this because I used to be a runner...a marathon runner. And I loved that feeling of running 10 miles or more. What a neat accomplishment! I want that feeling again.

So, I do this for me, but I also know that it does wonders for all of my other relationships, too.

I like this thread...

 

[nativetxn]

I care about what people think of me. I don't like to be stared at or laughed at, no one does. So, sure. I care what people think about me and that's part of the reason I want to lose weight.

Most of the reason I want to lose weight, though is to live a healthy long life. I'm 54, I need to get healthy if I want to live to be 75

 

[disneychick05]

This really is a great thread. I really agree with the couple of comments about the husbands. My husband has also never said anything about the weight I have gained. I wonder what he thinks though. Is he less attracted? When I was at my previous, normal/thin weight these thoughts never crossed my mind. The bottom line is that I had lots of self-confidence when I was thin. I believe I am on this weight loss quest to regain not only my figure but my self-esteem as well. I should really read this Dr. Phil book, huh?? Thanks for this thread...it really made my think about some of the issues I have surrounding my weight loss.

 

[mommyflower]

I have a few reasons for losing weight that are for myself and my family. First I need to do this so I keep my blood sugar in check. Now that I am eating better I definitely am a much happier person. I don't want to go back to feeling bad all the time and being very moody. I also don't want to get diabetes, which is where I was headed. I also want to go clothes shopping and be able to wear the clothes I like rather than what ever fits. I want to feel pretty and sexy again in my clothes. I also would like to get my weight down so I can have another baby. Not that my weight is prohibiting me from doing so, but I don't want another 20 to 30lbs more on top of what I already weight. I want to be a healthy and fit mother who can run around and play with her kids with ease. I agree with the self-confidence thing too. I use to be much more self-confident before I gained weight. So, my reasons are mostly for me, but my family benefits too.