Ok, for one thing my spandex shorts don't have pockets!

And I wasn't wearing them that day anyway - they were denim! Get your eyes checked

And I don't weigh 315! I am a little under 312 - maybe I was bloated that day due to my "female time" - so my PMS prob also made me yell at the MGR. It was a bad day for us. My last 2 bottom teeth fell out while I was trying to open a beer bottle, I got a call that day that my single wide trailer burned that day bc I left socks in the oven to dry since my dryer broke and my common law hubby was too drunk to fix it. So my 4 illegitimate grandkids carried it out onto the front lawn with the other appliances that don't work. I'm going to plant some flowers in the dryer like I put in our broken sink, toilet, and flat tires off our broken down minivan. When it rains it pours.... Good thing I have lots of SSR points to use for BWV. I think my family of 13 will have to stay there (squeezed into a 1 BR) now that our trailer burned. Hope to see you there!