Why is it.....

[PUZZLDY5]

That when someone asks your honest opinion on something and you give it to them they get mad at you? Really? If you didn't want to know, DON"T ASK!

 

[The Mystery Machine]

Well first off, you have to take into account the character of the person. If they are a person you know is really not asking for honest advice then you have to decline. They have gotten mad before, for example.

If you know this person gets mad at you & they insist on advice then you have to ask the person if you REALLY want them to be honest with advice.

Then you argue why giving them your honest opinion is not really relevant.

Basically you do a "stall technique" and blow them off.

Now if it is something for work & you have to give your input then present the advice in a manner that is not threatening.

 

[bicker]

Very often, people just want other people to ratify what they want to believe.

I wouldn't worry about it too much: Generally, your honesty, even though unappreciated, could be helping them move off of their staunch insistence on a position that may indeed not be correct.

 

[RitaZ.]

Most people want to be validated. Most aren't looking for someone to tell them that they're wrong or to present them with a view that opposes theirs. They want confirmation that what they're doing is right.

 

[DawnM]

This!

I have one friend who keeps asking for advice or opinions or honest evaluation and she is the type who DOES NOT WANT criticism of any kind, so I have to give VERY guarded opinions.

But I also think there is a kind way to make your point known. I am thinking of one friend right now who really needs to know that the man she is dating is garbage, but if I say that directly I know it will go nowhere......so instead I tell her that she is an amazing person who I have seen compromise her values for a man and I see the changes in her and think she needs to be with someone who builds her up and not tear her down like this guy is. It went a LOT further than what I wanted to say!

So, bottom line, people don't give two hoots what you think if you can't show that you care about them first and foremost and have their best interest in mind.

Dawn

Most people want to be validated. Most aren't looking for someone to tell them that they're wrong or to present them with a view that opposes theirs. They want confirmation that what they're doing is right.