Why get mad?

[Laurajean1014]

My DH (who normally is a great guy) totally lost it on me this morning.

My dog, Tucker (3yo golden retriever) is a great dog. Tucker had an accident on our bedroom carpet around 4:00 am and then had to go again (outside) along with throwing up. I cleaned up everything and took a shower. When I got out of the shower there were "landminds" all over my bedroom carpet.

Then I noticed throw up all over the bed, comforter, sheets, pillows and bedskirts. It was a mess.

I took Tucker out again and he felt better.

As soon as the dog came back in the house, my husband yells at the dog!

Why? He's sick - this isn't premeditated? It's not like he crayoned the walls?

I told my DH not to yell at the dog? So, he starts in on me! For what?

How can he get mad, when I was cleaning and picking up everything? How did this inconvenience him?

Thanks for letting me vent.

 

[Maleficent13]

That seems weird to me...I can't imagine getting mad at an animal for being sick. Does he have issues with the dog (like, did he not want Tucker in the first place?). Something like that may have contributed.

to Tucker.

 

[chesirechik]

Poor Tucker!

Maybe DH was just irritated because it was early and the big mess. I'm not a good morning person so I could relate!

My beagle did a number two sometime during the night in our living room, then went downstairs and slept in her crate. Dogs are crazy.

Hope yours is feeling better!

 

[Wishing on a star]

I see bigger issues here...

The OP says it is 'HER' dog. Big red flag there.

And 'HER' dog is obviously allowed free run in their bedroom overnight. And, apparantly in the bed, where he got sick. Sounds like this might be an issue for the DH.

And, I suspect that the issues do not end there.

 

[DVC Sadie]

I hope both your dh and Tucker feel better soon. I don't know why your dh would be mad at the dog for being sick but maybe he just didn't want to see you having to do so much work this morning or maybe he just woke up on the wrong side of the bed.

 

[Am_I_There_Yet]

For your DH:

Awwww, poor Tucker!

Chloe has done this to me many times and it's always in the middle of the night. She's really good at waking me up (she'll nudge me until I wake up), but sometimes she just can't make it.

When I do wake up, she's in a panic. She knows where she needs to be getting sick; it's up to me to get her there. That's what your DH needs to understand.

One word of warning - dogs get dehydrated very easily. Chloe has had to have IV's twice from doing what Tucker has done. Now I have drugs on hand (one pill for each end), from my vet.

I'd watch him closely.

 

[UnderTheMistletoe]

I wanted a male Golden to name him Tucker. We have a female instead

Well, firstly, I'm sorry to hear that Tucker isn't feeling well. It sounds like he got into something he shouldn't have. Keep an eye on him and make sure he's doing better by this evening. If he isn't, you may want to take him to the vet. Don't let him get dehydrated!

DH was probably frustrated and overtired. In his frustration, he began yelling ad when you told him to lay off the dog, he laid into you. I would probably wait until everything has cooled down and see if he apologizes. If he doesn't, you may want to have a civil conversation about your feelings. In the end, he's likely to realize that there's nothing the dog oculd do, you were taking the proper steps to clean up, and that yelling was the last thing anyone needed.

Do you have children? You can always compare it to yelling at sick children who missed the bathroon toilet....

 

[Am_I_There_Yet]

I see bigger issues here...

The OP says it is 'HER' dog. Big red flag there.

And 'HER' dog is obviously allowed free run in their bedroom overnight. And, apparantly in the bed, where he got sick. Sounds like this might be an issue for the DH.

And, I suspect that the issues do not end there.

Wow. And all I got out of it was that the dog got sick and her DH got pissed off.

 

[cardaway]

That seems weird to me...I can't imagine getting mad at an animal for being sick. Does he have issues with the dog (like, did he not want Tucker in the first place?). Something like that may have contributed.

Great question.

 

[JVL1018]

I'd be grumpy too at 4 am! If he's not normally like this toward Tucker, I'd just take it as irritation due to the early hour...and the grossness of it all.

 

[UnderTheMistletoe]

I'd be grumpy too at 4 am! If he's not normally like this toward Tucker, I'd just take it as irritation due to the early hour...and the grossness of it all.

Oh, yeah. I bet the love nest smelt fabulous.

 

[Christine]

Okay, I'm going to make a sweeping generalization here. I've known many men (husbands of my friends and my own husband) who have "lost it" when a dog got sick. Or even when the dog did something wrong. I think it's odd too--like the dog can understand why you're losin your temper. I'm sure there are women out there who have "lost" it, but I've only ever known men to do that.

My own husband has gotten angry with my son because he had a hard time making it to the toilet when he was sick. He didn't go off on him or anything, but the irritation was definitely noted.

 

[Towncrier]

Just an FYI (coming from a guy). You probably realize that guys in general have a very limited set of emotions from which to draw upon. And anger is one of them. I am not condoning your DH's outburst. It's just that men don't seem to have the rainbow of emotions to draw upon. Don't know if it's nature or nurture.

Perhaps I'm stating the obvious, but that's another thing that guys do well.

I hope that your furbaby is feeling better soon and that your DH apologizes for his outburst.

 

[Annie68]

I see bigger issues here...

The OP says it is 'HER' dog. Big red flag there.

And 'HER' dog is obviously allowed free run in their bedroom overnight. And, apparantly in the bed, where he got sick. Sounds like this might be an issue for the DH.

And, I suspect that the issues do not end there.

Jeesh! A little harsh don't you think?

To the OP:
My beagle had the same problem last week. The Vet said a virus is going around, that she has seen several dogs the past 2 weeks with vomiting/diarrhea. They took a stool speciman, did a physical & put her on medication for the loose stools (Endosorb) & an antibiotic (Flagyl). I had her on the lamb/rice mixture food from the vet for a few days, then gradually switched her back to her own. She's doing good now. I hope your furbaby is feeling better soon.

(My DH was also irritated when the dog had an accident in the house, but he apologized later. No issues with him and the dog, as others would say, but he just didn't comprehend that she was ill at the moment it had happened.)

 

[Oreo Cookie]

I'd be grumpy too at 4 am! If he's not normally like this toward Tucker, I'd just take it as irritation due to the early hour...and the grossness of it all.

I agree with this. We have a dog, and my husband can't handle when he gets sick. He doesn't yell, but the few times my dog has vomited, my husband just has to get out of the room, so if it was the middle of night, I could see he just lost it. I wouldn't read too much into it.

How's the pooch doing now? I hope feeling all better!

 

[azgal81]

Sounds like your DH was just annoyed at the situation. Hopefully things are better now and your dog is feeling better as well!

 

[munchkin bunchkin]

Give Tucker a hug and kiss for me! AND here's a for you! Hopefully DH will be in a better mood tonight, if not let Tucker sleep with you and DH can have the floor!

 

[Laurajean1014]

Currently, DH has lots going on (business, travel, etc.) however, it is no excuse for losing your temper over a sick animal. He adores Tucker, but he is not as touchy feely as I am.

My feeling: The dog is sick, so don't upset the poor animanl anymore than it already is....

When he yelled, he told me that he's late for going to a job - well, Tucker had nothing to do with it and neither did I.

My DH can't handle home issues. He has his issues with his business and that takes up his brain power. Whereas I, I can handle a big load of issues and knock them off one by one (without someone yelling at me).

 

[Hercules10]

Sick pups always get a "No yelling" card in my crib. Hope Tucker is feeling better. Did you change food on him or?

 

[Laurajean1014]

Didn't change his food but I did give him some chicken and that's what came up.

I feel so guilty. I thought I was rewarding him and now I've made him sick.

I went home from work to check on him and he left me a deposit. Hopefully, the last one (bowel movement).

He jumped up to see me and was very attentive.