Why do people do this? (vent)

[minkydog]

My SIL called my hubby(her brother) today to wax eloquent about the FABulous cruise they just went on for their anniversary. She went on & on, gushing about how wonderful everything was and how we've "just got to do this sometime." this is the same SIL who agreed to take care of our autistic son for 3 days then reneged. Finally, DH got a little peeved about it and remarked that he would love to go on a cruise if we had childcare. SIL shot back "well, you can't afford it anyway." It's true, we can't afford it right now,but that was a hateful thing to say.

So Dear SIL: We're happy that you have enough money and time and freedom to take these trips with your new husband. Could you please, however, keep the gloating to a minimum? It's hurts us to know that you are so insensitive to our feelings. Don't call us up just to brag about your FABulous trip; how about you call us up to meet for dinner sometime or take one of the kids to the beach(it doesn't have to be the disabled one.)

I realize it is not your responsibility to help raise your autistic,mentally handicapped nephew. We love him and are giving everything we have to make his life a good one. We are not sorry that our lives have turned out this way. In fact, we feel a little sorry for YOU--we live with a child who gives unconditional love, who hugs freely and smiles constantly. He's never cross or difficult, although he needs full on physical assistance in every aspect of his life. However, certain sacrifices will always be a part of our lives--could you try to be a bit sympathetic?

Cathy--looks forward to celebrating 25yrs of wedded bliss with an overnight trip to Callaway Gardens

 

[AllyandJack]

Wow....I don't even know what to say. That was just rude. What a terrible thing to say to someone. How dare someone inform someone else what they can and can't afford?!

You have the right idea. In fact, she's probably throwing her material possessions in your face because she envies you. It's sad that she doesn't realize that no amount of cruises and replace your DS....he's worth infinite cruises and it's really sad that she can't get that.

Let her have her cruises.....they can't make her day with a simple hug or a smile like I'm sure your DS can do for you.

 

[Mimi Q]

 

[L107ANGEL]

Wow....I don't even know what to say. That was just rude. What a terrible thing to say to someone. How dare someone inform someone else what they can and can't afford?!

You have the right idea. In fact, she's probably throwing her material possessions in your face because she envies you. It's sad that she doesn't realize that no amount of cruises and replace your DS....he's worth infinite cruises and it's really sad that she can't get that.

Let her have her cruises.....they can't make her day with a simple hug or a smile like I'm sure your DS can do for you.

Very well said!!!

Sorry she is a pita. Do you have anyone to help you and DH out?

 

[FSUGrad97]

Wow....I don't even know what to say. That was just rude. What a terrible thing to say to someone. How dare someone inform someone else what they can and can't afford?!

You have the right idea. In fact, she's probably throwing her material possessions in your face because she envies you. It's sad that she doesn't realize that no amount of cruises and replace your DS....he's worth infinite cruises and it's really sad that she can't get that.

Let her have her cruises.....they can't make her day with a simple hug or a smile like I'm sure your DS can do for you.

I totally agree!

It has been my experience that people who feel the need to brag about what they have, etc., are doing so to make up for something that they are lacking in their own life. Either that, or she's a total witch.

Hugs to you

 

[minkydog]

Thanks,ya'll. We do have some respite now & then. Christian is a darling boy, but he's lot like a 100lb toddler--into things and very fast It's hard to get anyone to give it a try; he can be exhausting.

I think DH is just having a bit of a pity party right now. He's coming to terms with his own chronic disability and his lungs have been so tight lately. His energy is limited and he feels like he's being lazy. But he's not! He gives every bit of energy he has to his family and work, but there's not any left at the end of the day. It's not a horrible life,though our choices are a bit circumcribed. We love each other very much.

We're going camping this week up in the mountains, which we so enjoy and DH can still do that. Christian can also do that, so it's a very nice family thing for us. We can do car trips pretty well. It would be nice to take a week-long trip without Christian, but it's okay. I think DH was just feeling like he wants his life and the choices in his sister's life too, and you just can't have everything.

 

[L107ANGEL]

You know what you have that your SIL doesn't? Heart, spirit and the good sense to know what is important!!!

 

[JoiseyMom]

Look on the bright side. With the sort of personality your SIL has, her new husband will eventually dump her and move on !!

 

[sajetto]

Look on the bright side. With the sort of personality your SIL has, her new husband will eventually dump her and move on !!

Sad thing is, that you are probably right.


minkydog

 

[Chipperdini]

looks forward to celebrating 25yrs of wedded bliss

with an overnight trip to Callaway Gardens

Callaway Gardens is so pretty. Hope you have a lovely time.

 

[DVC Sadie]

I totally agree!

It has been my experience that people who feel the need to brag about what they have, etc., are doing so to make up for something that they are lacking in their own life. Either that, or she's a total witch.

Hugs to you

ITA! I cannot even fathom someone let alone a SIL saying that to you. What a inconsiderate, self loathing person she must be. WOW sometimes the word WOW says it all.