Where have we failed?

[WDW LOVR]

Last night our 17 yr old son told us he would rather stay home and not miss school than go to WDW in Oct with the family.

He's normally a Disney fanatic who can't wait for the next trip. He said something about not missing the "lockin" his teen anti-drug group is having that weekend and he'd miss 3 days of school which he didn't want to do.

That's it, I questioned whether we were good parents before, but now I know we've failed miserably.

Oh well, we still have hope. Our 13 yr old son thinks his brother is crazy and he's not missing it for anything!

 

[Eeyore2003]

Yep, sounds serious. Hopefully he'll recover in a few years and you'll be able to hold your head proudly again!!! Until then, you do have the younger one to console you. (until HE reaches the ripe old age of 17!!!)

Seriously, if that's your most "awful" problem, you've done well and deserve a pat on the back!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The last time my little one came he was 16. Now I think I'll have to wait for the grandchildren!!! They're 20 and 26, not married and no kids, so they're not real interested in going to Disney World with "Mom and Dad" right now. Have a great time. It's harder on the parents than the kids when they start the "separation" time. Even though DH and I absolutely find WDW AWESOME without kids, there's something special about the times there were the 4 of us. Now we just get the crumbs they let fall from the table!!! At least for a while.

Do enjoy the little one. There was also something special about the time we had with our little one alone after the oldest stop doing things like that with us and when he left home. Have fun!!!

 

[princess aurora]

A "lock in" eh? Hmmm I wonder what little chicky-poo he has his eye on that will be there as well?
Not to fret but it is a time when teenagers want to gain some independence from their parents and life at school and their job/extra curricular activities IS their life.

Plus he'll get to have a rockin' party while you're awway and you get to test your limits of trust. What could be more perfect in the growing experience of raising children.

(Please I hope you sense the sarcasim - good luck and my condolences to you)

 

[mrFDNY]

are you sure he's not thinking "house party"??

 

[kerry34]

WOW, If someone offered that to me at that age, I would have been packed and ready a month beforehand. Kudos to you!! I can only pray my kids are that logical at that age!!

 

[ksdave]

The biggest thing you have probably missed is this: he's 17 now. My kids were 12 and 10 when we got the "big change". We asked them where they wanted to go on their next FL vacation (we had just done an 8-day trip the year before to UO and WDW). The answer from both was immediate: "UNIVERSAL!"
I hate to say it, but once they get to a certian age, the kids really want the thrill of the Hulk, Spiderman, Dueling Dragons, Mummy, MIB, etc., etc. My daughter has even decided on a trip to UO with us and one of her friends instead of a sweet sixteen party in February.
Ask your son if he will go if you do a couple of days at Universal. Let us know what he says.

 

[KCMiller]

Wait, I can beat that - my dd, 16 and my ds, 13, put the kibosh on a 7 day Disney CRUISE because they'd have to miss 4 days of school after Christmas vacation to go. I'm not cancelling yet, though - I have until October of 2006 (when final payment is due) to tempt them into being truant . . .

Does that make me a bad parent ???


KC

 

[vettechick99]

Oh it's not you. I did the same thing when I was 14. It was WDW or a weekend-long Lock-In. Back then, boys trumped Mickey. Always.

 

[Laurajean1014]

Tell him that there will be "hot chicks" in Disney and that you'll take him to Typhoon Lagoon to "see the sights."

 

[Tiggerkeeper]

Our 18 DD said the same thing last year - she was afraid of how much work she'd have to make up. But said if we wanted to give her a trip for graduation that would be fine!!

 

[tevagirl]

OMG. There's nothing worse than a mature, level headed teenager. I think it's too late to save him. Hopefully you'll do better with the 13 year old.

 

[Briarmom]

It sounds like it's time for tough love. You won't want to hear this, but I think you have to kick him out of the house. I am sorry to be the one to tell you.

 

[CheshireVal]

It's hard for teenagers to miss so much school. I bet his answer would be different if it were during a school holiday.

 

[swilphil]

Make him go. He'll thank you later on. Try to do something special for him during the trip--go to Universal, his favorite restaurant, etc. Three days of school is not a big deal. He'll be out of the house in a couple of years, so keep him a kid while you can.

 

[WatchinCaptKangaroo]

Make him go. He'll thank you later on. Try to do something special for him during the trip--go to Universal, his favorite restaurant, etc. Three days of school is not a big deal. He'll be out of the house in a couple of years, so keep him a kid while you can.

You want a mopy perturbed teenager on a trip to WDW? Missing 3 days of school can be a huge deal to a Senior. These last few months of high school are also a big deal in regards to friends. He may thank them for taking him to Disney but never forget that he missed fun time wtih his freinds (who will all be talking about it).

Don't make him go if he doesn't want to (and you trust him by himself). Go, have fun and let him have fun at the lock-in.

 

[damo]

The biggest thing you have probably missed is this: he's 17 now. My kids were 12 and 10 when we got the "big change". We asked them where they wanted to go on their next FL vacation (we had just done an 8-day trip the year before to UO and WDW). The answer from both was immediate: "UNIVERSAL!"
I hate to say it, but once they get to a certian age, the kids really want the thrill of the Hulk, Spiderman, Dueling Dragons, Mummy, MIB, etc., etc. My daughter has even decided on a trip to UO with us and one of her friends instead of a sweet sixteen party in February.
Ask your son if he will go if you do a couple of days at Universal. Let us know what he says.

That sounds just like my 16 year old son!!!

 

[jennyl772003]

Take lots of pictures. When you get back, show him what a wonderful time you had. Start every sentence with "At Disney..." Keep talking about all the inappropratly dressed girls. Heck, take pictures of them. Keep talking about it and maybe you can get him to go next year.

 

[shep]

Whats her name??

 

[WDW LOVR]

First let me say, Thanks for feeling our pain. Now let me answer some of the questions.

Princess Aurora: He is on the staff of the anti-drug group and one of their rules is they can't date anyone on the staff or in the program. Want to avoid the conflict of interest, if you get my drift. His GF is not on the staff and doesn't attend the events.

MrFDNY (and all the other Party suggestions): Unless he can convince Grandma to party hardy, that's not going to happen as he'll be staying with one or the other of his Grandma's.

KSDAVE: You'd think wouldn't you? But he's not the rollercoaster type of kid. Still hasn't rode ToT (and this would have been his 12th trip to WDW). We live about 1 1/2 hours from Cedar Point (the park with the most roller coasters in the world, including a whole bunch of record breakers when they were built) and he rarely goes there and if he does, he doesn't ride many coasters. He's afraid of heights. And really, he loves Epcot because of the bands (he's been playing guitar for about 4 years now so he loves listening to them).

CaptKangaroo: I agree, no way I want a teen with an attitude for 4 days spoiling our fun at the Food and Wine festival.

Now that all that's been said, I have to say, he is a parents dream. Gets good grades, is on the anti-addiction group staff, is a member of the Mayor's teen advisorary council, rarely comes home late and calls if he will be, is a black belt in karate for 4 years now and helps teach a karate class at the local university (when he has time) and almost every other adult that he has contact with tells us what a fine, polite young man he is. Actually I'm not sure how he turned out so great with parents like us!

Now if we could just figure out some way to cut his hair without him waking up

 

[Blondie]

You are not alone, my 15 doesn't really want to go either!

My 14 y.o. son is okay with it, but all I am getting is grief from my older son.

I'd love to leave him home, but there's no way I'm doing that at his age!

I asked him if there was a friend he'd want to stay with instead of going, but all I get is a bunch of mumbling that I can't even hear, let along understand!

They've both mentioned the work that they'll have to make up when they return and they're somewhat stressed about it, but they're both good students.

I think once we get there he'll be okay!