When will I learn to stop inviting people

[toniosmom]

I am VERY selective about who I invite to join us. My DVC vacations are precious to me and the LAST thing I want is stress! My parents are the one and only people who I would not hesitate to invite again because I KNOW they will NEVER cancel out on me and they are very flexible in what plans we make. Forget anyone else. Last year, I invited a bunch of family to come with us this year because they expressed a sincere interest in joining us. By the time the 7 month mark rolled around, I started to feel like they were doing ME a favor by joining us. I quickly let them off the hook and happily invited my parents to replace them. One of them actually said to me "I know there will be another time when you will invite us." Hmmm....not so sure about that.

 

[Goofy DVC]

I know this is hard to believe, but since 93 we've invited 46 different people to WDW with us, most problem free. As a matter of fact, we never had a cancellation. Had a couple of no thank yous up front but everyone who committed went happily.We never charged a penney, but people paid for their own food and park tickets.Even on the trips there were very few minor issues. Guess we're lucky. I will say though that me and DW look forward to our "just us" trips now.By the way, two family members who went with us ended up joining DVC.

 

[Dean]

I was asked about menus. I emailed menus to all, took votes from the group -check. Logged in at 180 days, made ADRS, emailed the reservation numbers to all, etc. What else could I have done?

Other than getting them to make a financial committment if they don't go, not much else. Some people just don't get it with timeshares as they see that your risk is little to nothing, incorrect but that's how they see it.

 

[KBoopaloo]

In the process of planning a large trip with 13 of our family members and starting to think that inviting them was not a great idea. LOL I think our problem is that we have too many smaller family groups within the 13 people and everyone has their own issues and agenda. I think my lesson learned is to ask just ONE family group at a time to travel, rather than try to get the ENTIRE family to come at one time.

 

[dianeschlicht]

In the process of planning a large trip with 13 of our family members and starting to think that inviting them was not a great idea. LOL I think our problem is that we have too many smaller family groups within the 13 people and everyone has their own issues and agenda. I think my lesson learned is to ask just ONE family group at a time to travel, rather than try to get the ENTIRE family to come at one time.

At the very least, you should plan to reserve multiple accommodations so you can easily drop some when some of the groups start falling by the wayside. The one time we had a few issues with guests was when we stayed with 12 in a GV at OKW. We had mostly the same group that we had a few years earlier, but with the addition of two people in another seperate group. Those two people were the monkey wrench in the works! They waited until the last minute to commit, and then they had "issues" with everything during the trip. They didn't want to get up and go with the rest of the group, didn't want to eat at the same times, didn't see anything or ride anything. They whole issue was that they couldn't adjust to what the rest of the group was doing, and consequently they had no fun and caused a few others of the group to have less fun than normal too. I know the issues we had that time would have been greatly reduced if those two people would have had thier own studio.

 

[dbs1228]

I am going with 2 girlfriends on May 15 (leaving hubbies and kids home) OKW 2 bedroom (1st dvc trip for me and did not know if a 1 bedroom would be good for 3???) I have been getting the calls and text from them every other day with the count down! Do not think I have to worry about them cancelling! Maybe it is the no hubbies and kids! lol

 

[corpcomp]

Went down to WDW during Spring Break and another family with a son the same age as ours (14) was coming as well. My son was excited. This is her only son and she is extremely (almost paranoid) protective of him, afraid he will die if she is not around.

Their son made the Freshman Baseball team and over the next three weeks the mother kept saying she was worried he might get benched a few games if he missed any during the break.

Durng that three weeks he played in only two games and played very little. The boy begged her to let him go to WDW but the day before we were scheduled to leave she cancelled on us which messed up our dinner plans (that were in her name.) I had called her several times before leaving messages regarding her decision but she did not return my calls. My son was totally crushed after three weeks of anticipation of going on rides with his friend. As a teen, we (parents) are no longer cool.

When we returned, we found out that her son was benched during the two games over break and essentially only played one inning. We knew it would happen, At the freshman level, only the best players in our town get to play regularly and he is not that good compared to others on the team. The equal play ethic required through 8th grade gets thrown out in ninth. The rule is win at all costs.

After we got back we saw her and she asked me if I would still talk to her.

I smiled and politely said No. Maybe in a few weeks I'll talk to her but for now I will let her stew.

 

[dbs1228]

Oh that really stinks! I coach little league softball myself and know the rules of school ball, my DD played school softball but when it came down to vacation or sports she wanted to be with the family and was willing to be benched. Some people could not understand and would never make that choice.
I really wish if a school is given a vacation they would not make it mandatory that players be there or be benched a gripe I have had for a very long time. It is not a fair choice for anyone involved and I have seen this for many years.
I feel bad for your son, I know my kids would be devasted if they were counting on a friend and last minute they were not able to go.

 

[Telcogirl]

I wish our friends WOULD have bailed on us last November.

The short version. Ten day trip in a two bedroom AKL Villa. First night there my friend (of 30 years) and I are down at the pool. My wife and Lady ex are up in the room getting ready to join us when lady ex drops the bomb. She has met another man and is leaving her husband after the vacation. Nice. Thank God it was a two bedroom lock-off.

Was that necessary for her to do that on a vacation you helped to provide for her?

People NEVER cease to amaze me...........

 

[BroganMc]

It always amazes me that people will bail on a Disney vacation with free accomodations! I know there can be unexpected financial problems but I would eat Spaghettios for a month if it meant saving money for a Disney trip!

LOL. That's how I feel. Just substitute Ramen noodles for Spaghettios... they're cheaper.

Been there, done that, bought the T-shirt on the trying to drag friends and family down to Disney. It took us 5 years to get my sibs and aunt/uncle to come down. Now we have an opposite problem. They liked it so much they want to come again!

I do find I run around a lot more when I have guests with us. It becomes a more tiring vacation than I expected. A good tiring. Maybe when we get to the same sort of group or my guests have enough experience being here to be more independent... I mean when I stop feeling the need to show them something they've never seen. They have to see all I've seen then I can stop playing Tour Guide Barbie.

 

[BroganMc]

Went down to WDW during Spring Break and another family with a son the same age as ours (14) was coming as well. My son was excited. This is her only son and she is extremely (almost paranoid) protective of him, afraid he will die if she is not around.


Durng that three weeks he played in only two games and played very little. The boy begged her to let him go to WDW but the day before we were scheduled to leave she cancelled on us which messed up our dinner plans (that were in her name.) I had called her several times before leaving messages regarding her decision but she did not return my calls. My son was totally crushed after three weeks of anticipation of going on rides with his friend. As a teen, we (parents) are no longer cool.

Hmm, does that not sound like the mom got a full dose of teen angst while you were away.

There's a fine balance between monitoring your teen kids and suffocating them into rebellion. Shame, but then you probably wouldn't have wanted to be caught in the middle of it anyway. Imagine mom calling every 15 minutes to check-in or questioning the boys' decision to go on Mission:Space ("but that's killed people and you have a weak stomach").

My dream kid/family vacation is to wake up at SSR and find my nieces and nephews meeting at the bus stop to decide which park/rides they want to go on that day. Then we adults can join them as chaperones or mix & match as big kids ourselves. I'd love to bump into them around the World and do things spontaneously. Maybe in 5-10 years?

 

[eliza61]

I want you to know Dave, it's not your fault. LOL. It's the evil Disney and those darn commercials.
See, you look at all those happy advertisements with the children skipping happily along with the parents, running lovingly into grandma and poppops arms (while never any crowds around). You see the ones with a group of adults with mickey ears on, laughing and enjoying a meal or the men in one group golfing while the women are shopping
and you think...

THAT'S ME AND MY FAMILY!! who can resist, so you try to gather the clan together and

Resist these commercials at all cost, form a support group if you need too but do not ever give into the temptation. It will only lead to heartbreak.

 

[toniosmom]

I want you to know Dave, it's not your fault. LOL. It's the evil Disney and those darn commercials.
See, you look at all those happy advertisements with the children skipping happily along with the parents, running lovingly into grandma and poppops arms (while never any crowds around). You see the ones with a group of adults with mickey ears on, laughing and enjoying a meal or the men in one group golfing while the women are shopping
and you think...

THAT'S ME AND MY FAMILY!! who can resist, so you try to gather the clan together and

Resist these commercials at all cost, form a support group if you need too but do not ever give into the temptation. It will only lead to heartbreak.

That's hysterical, but true. I often look at those commercials and think to myself -- why can't that be US? Well, it can't because I have a great family with one odd family member who has the uncanny ability to crap all over everything we do.

So.....we travel without her....

 

[kim532]

I had my first cancel this last trip. My mom was coming with us. We flew out of Milwaukee and mom was flying out of Cincinatti. I was standing at baggage clain in Orlando when I got the voicemail from my mom, she decided not to come. You couldn't have told me yesterday?

I told her she wasn't invited again. I mean it too.

Burn me once-shame on you. Burn me twice-shame on me.

 

[corpcomp]

I had my first cancel this last trip. My mom was coming with us. We flew out of Milwaukee and mom was flying out of Cincinatti. I was standing at baggage clain in Orlando when I got the voicemail from my mom, she decided not to come. You couldn't have told me yesterday?

I told her she wasn't invited again. I mean it too.

Burn me once-shame on you. Burn me twice-shame on me.

I can see her rewriting her will now

 

[dbs1228]

I had my first cancel this last trip. My mom was coming with us. We flew out of Milwaukee and mom was flying out of Cincinatti. I was standing at baggage clain in Orlando when I got the voicemail from my mom, she decided not to come. You couldn't have told me yesterday?

I told her she wasn't invited again. I mean it too.

Burn me once-shame on you. Burn me twice-shame on me.

Your own mother??? If you cannot count on mom who can you count on!

 

[corpcomp]

Your own mother??? If you cannot count on mom who can you count on!

Dad!

 

[DISNEY FIX]

We must be really selfish. Our points are for us if anyone wants join us the number to CRO is (except for grandma).......too much going on in other peoples lives and thinking to jeopardize our vacations. The horror stories from these boards have solidified our thinking. We have a family joining us in Aug. their own flights and rooms I made dining resies to accommodate all of us. This way no one family is financially tied to the other.
In full disclosure we are also renting a ski house in the winter for 8 days with the same family but that does not involve a perishable item like points.

 

[bookwormde]

I have taken to "splitting" our vacations, we do 2 weeks with "guests" joining us during the middle, and they all know as a guest they must commit 11 months ahead of time.

bookwormde

 

[nunzia]

Let's see...My own little horror story I guess. For 2 YEARS I planned a family reunion type thing when my daughter graduated college. This was before DVC and all expenses paid by us, so it was three rooms in the GC, all tickets, train to and from, 3 nice meals and spending cash. Well, daughter gets divorced and ex, who is still invited says he 'likes Six Flags better" and doesn't want to go even though they are on good terms (going with us to Sea World this year)..I guess the kid's don't mean anything. Oldest son neglects to save..as usual..so we end up paying for more and more since we are worried about this and that, plus they smoke so every few minutes we are losing the gang and wait for smoking or split up and catch up..and they are shufflers and you wouldn't believe how long they can take to get two kids out of strollers and the third is the one with Aspergers so most rides are iffy and the wife doesn't really like rides....then, the younger son has a job he can't get away from and also now a girlfriend with 2 kids from a previous marriage who also can't get away from the job since they work together. Oh..did I mention that daughter decides to have ORAL SURGERY 2 days before we leave..much too gross to detail, but was still in the really early stages of healing and didn't feel too swift.
Oh yea...it was also 105 in Anaheim and I had some food issue and was sick for a day and a half.
And yet....we had fun, the kids remember nothing but princesses and pirates, the older son has started saving for another trip, daughter and kids have gone a second time with us already and younger son and now wife and additional baby girl are being treated to the missed trip in Jan 11 after son finishes Police Academy.
We have some great stories from this trip..missing son went along as Flat Johnny..cardboard cutout of him, and we took pictures of him with princesses, on rides, etc, and made him a scrapbook. It was stressful, but I'm sure at times we were dancing around with adoring grandkids hugging Mickey.
Our first trip to VGC is next week..it was meant to be a getawy for me and DH...then BIL and SIS say they are coming..OK? It's fine and hey..we get a 1BR to treat them..then other BIL decides it would be a hoot...can you fit on a Murphy bed? So we're all going and really looking forward to it, weather looks good, I'll avoid suspected food item..so far no one has cancelled because they bought their own tickets and stuff, and I think it all go well