When Did I Get Voted Off of Skinny Island & Why is This Fat Shadow Stalking Me?

[gellybean]

I'm so stupid excited I'm about to explode.

I just ordered a body bugg!!!!



I am about ready to burst I'm so psyched!!

I've been watching those puppies for a while and periodically check 24 hr Fitness's site for membership deals. I have contemplated joining a 'bigger' gym after about a year of doing my baby gym. I'd really like to try spin and aerobics and stuff and am debating between 24 hr Fitness and the Y.

Anyway, long story short while I was on the website checking on their gym memberships I noticed that the Body Bugg was $70 bucks off regular price! AND then I read the fine print that the price was free shipping, no tax and included 6 months of their website support (normally 10 bucks a month) and I'd get a free personal phone coach session to start with.

Holy great deal Batman! Where do I sign up!!!!!!!!

So Momma got herself a mother's day gift a little early.

I can't wait to get started on it and to see how much my body is actually burning!!

Amy- Thanks for letting me know that I wasn't the only one having DIS difficulties!

And I totally agree with you. I need to start reflecting more on things that I feel aren't a big enough deal to be baggage. If I didn't deal with it, it's my baggage, regardless of how 'little' it may be.





To everyone: Anybody want to friend up on Facebook? I thought it might be cool to put some faces to some names and connect on Facebook too! If anyone wants me to add you, pm your email addy!

 

[mom2faith]

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[gellybean]

You ladies sounds just like I did a couple of months ago. Some how I have managed to get control on the food addiction and I can (at least for now) stop myself. Although it terrifies me each and every day that I will suddenly wake up and find myself back where I was with no ability to control what I was shoving in my mouth.

I used food as medication and celebration. If I was happy I ate to celebrate. If I was sad I ate to make myself feel better. If I was stressed I ate to relieve the stress. If I was bored I ate out of the boredom. If I was procrastinating on something I ate to pass the time. It never had anything to do with hungry -- it had everything to do with self-medicating.

Alcoholism and drug abuse run in my family. I always was SO careful to stay away from alcohol and drugs out of fear that I would easily become an addict due to my genetics. Well, I did become an addict -- except it was a legal one and a somewhat socially acceptable one. I was (or should I say I am) addicted to food.

I also can't believe that I am writing this but for me gaining weight also had to do with hiding -- hiding from men. I always got a lot of attention from men. When I married my current husband and had the twins with him I realized that I loved him and really wanted to be with JUST him but I still had men hitting on me. I didn't trust myself. When DH and I had problems years ago the weight protected me from myself. Being thin would have made it to easy to find someone else but being fat forced me to stay with DH who accepts me no matter what size I am. I still can't believe I am writing this. Admitting this is SO hard for me. This is still a MAJOR fear of mine especially if I ever accomplish my weight loss goals. Overall my marriage with DH is good but it does have its ups and downs and when it is bad it is REALLY bad. And when we are in a bad run I eat and eat to keep myself here instead of leaving.

HUGE kuddos for facing that !!!! So proud of you! I can totally see what you mean. There's a lot of things I could say from my past that are probably TMI for the boards but... I know that I have had the thought run through my mind, especially in my first marriage, of "would I stay if I was skinny and could get attention elsewhere?"




Intense stuff today.

The things I bolded are the exact way I am.

The avoiding drugs and alcohol are totally me. I've never touched a cigarette in my life. Never done any illegal substances. Never ever been drunk. Buzzed off two margaritas, yes, but never drunk. And I have always had (ashamed to admit it) a bit of a prideful attitude about this, when in reality I'm just as much of an addict as any one else. In my defense, a lot of why I avoided those substances was because I *KNEW* I was prone to addiction and was fearful I wouldn't be able to handle those things in moderation. In some ways I wonder if it's easier to be a drug addict or alcoholic. Those addictions you can detox from and never touch the stuff again. Food you can't. I have to keep eating. I can't give it up forever.

The thing you said that I up-sized is a HUGE bam right between the eyes for me. You could not have said it better. I.am.terrified that this time won't be different. That I'll slip back into my old habits, my old apathy.




Here's an excerpt from my blog on livestrong that I wrote back on March 3:

And it begins.....


Weight loss. What an ugly word. It saps the life out of me to think about it. But the irony of that statement is that the life is literally being sucked out of me without weight loss. I don't know if this time will truly be different. I can only hope. Hope. Hope can be a devastating thing. But without it, where would we be? I've tried to lose weight many times in my life. Done fad diets and stupid medical interventions. But this time I'm doing it the hard way. The right way, I hope. Counting calories and exercise. It seems so simple now that I've started it. It's something I've known would work. So why haven't I done it before ?


I don't know.
I could list a thousand reasons. The truth, deep down, is I really don't know why. It seemed impossible before. Literally impossible. And now it seems doable.

And I'm terrified. I am scared to death that it will become impossible again. And I wish to God I knew what made the difference in me. What made it seem so seemingly undoable and now seems like something I can really put into place as a permanent fixture in my life. It doesn't seem so hard. And I'm scared it will become hard.

I'm doing everything I can do keep it easy. I have joined a support group online and now this site. I love this site. The info, the format, the blogging and diary and that you can keep them separate, and one marked private. I love the tools and data available.

I hope I've put myself into the Perfect Storm-calorie counting, exercise, and moral support.


Until next time.

 

[gellybean]

Dizneydawn - Like I said earlier I am reading your TR (the Goofy/LapDance one). OMG!! I was so into it, I was reading and eating a Motts Fruitsation (you know the unsweetened applesauce). Well, I was enthralled in the TR and not paying attention. After finishing it, I headed to the washroom and looked in the mirror and I have applesauce all over my shirt!! I did not even notice I was dribbling down my shirt while I was reading!! Thank goodness I am alone at work today - the boys would have never let me live it down!!

OMG! That's hilarious!! Dawn - you're THAT good.

 

[adnilele]

the things i bolded are the exact way i am.

The avoiding drugs and alcohol are totally me. I've never touched a cigarette in my life. Never done any illegal substances. Never ever been drunk. Buzzed off two margaritas, yes, but never drunk. And i have always had (ashamed to admit it) a bit of a prideful attitude about this, when in reality i'm just as much of an addict as any one else. In my defense, a lot of why i avoided those substances was because i *knew* i was prone to addiction and was fearful i wouldn't be able to handle those things in moderation. In some ways i wonder if it's easier to be a drug addict or alcoholic. Those addictions you can detox from and never touch the stuff again. Food you can't. I have to keep eating. I can't give it up forever.

The thing you said that i up-sized is a huge bam right between the eyes for me. You could not have said it better. I.am.terrified that this time won't be different. That i'll slip back into my old habits, my old apathy.



I don't know.
I could list a thousand reasons. The truth, deep down, is i really don't know why. It seemed impossible before. Literally impossible. And now it seems doable.

And i'm terrified. I am scared to death that it will become impossible again. And i wish to god i knew what made the difference in me. What made it seem so seemingly undoable and now seems like something i can really put into place as a permanent fixture in my life. It doesn't seem so hard. And i'm scared it will become hard.

Until next time.

totally.the.same.

 

[zoegirl]

Wow, a lot of Ah-Ha moments and epiphanies today. I can relate to what so many of you are talking about. For some reason i really love the full feeling I get when I over eat. It took me awhile to figure out, but I feel like I've been eating like that for so long because that full/satisfied feeling I was getting when I overate was taking the place of some other areas in my life that were empty. I have kept my weight under control for years (within 5-10lbs) because I have been running and exercising for so long. But starting last fall the weight started creeping up on me and before I knew it I had gained almost 20 lbs!

I really feel like when we figure out what's at the root of all the eating (which for most of us isn't really food) we have a better chance of getting the weight off and keeping it off.

Today I ate within my points, with 3 to spare for a fat free fudge bar we do what we have to to lose the weight right? I took cycle this morning and played with my 3 yo & his best buddy in the yard. Late evening is the worst time of day for me to stay out of the pantry.........

~bree~

 

[ancestry]

Okay - I have an actual Disney related question.....

How many of you have actually used any of the gyms at any of the Disney resorts?

Our trip is coming up in 15 days. We are going to be at Disney for 10 full days (arriving early and leaving late). We are staying club level and also have the dining plan plus we have dinner reservations at several of the signature restaurants. In other words the trip is VERY food focused - primarily to keep my husband happy. An enjoyable dining experience is what he enjoys on vacation.

I promised him early on that I would not be obsessing about food and trying to stay on a diet -- that I would allow myself these 10 days to try to eat like a normal person, although I'm not so sure I'm capable of eating like a normal person. I'm going to order what I want when I am hungry and not worry about calories. BUT I am not going to binge and I will stop eating when I am full and will not stuff myself just to clean my plate or to maximize the value of the dining plan like I used to do. If I am not hungry I won't eat.

Obviously we will be walking a lot but compared to the level of exercise I normally do the walking isn't going to be much. I was thinking about trying to get in a couple of gym days for a more intense workout but my DH thinks I am nuts that I want to go to the gym when we are at Disney.

Has anyone else had their Disney trip hit in the middle of their weight loss program like this? What did you do? Did you try to stay on plan or did you give yourself a free ticket for the trip?

 

[mom2faith]

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[tlenzendorf]

Way to go with the A-HA moments girls! Thats a great step!

Welcome to the new members!

Ancestry and Mom2faith, I hope you have great vacations!

Here is my food for today:
Water
2 packets Quaker Instant Raisin and Spice Oatmeal

 

[mom2faith]

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[Mndisneygirl]

I can't answer most of your questions but I believe there is a sugar free or reduced sugar Gatorade out there. DH had to have a test recently and the instructions said something about drinking gatorade or if diabetic, the sugar free one. Is it G2? Sorry I don't have much info, but I'm pretty sure there's one out there.

 

[zoegirl]

From my limited google searching I found that adding electrolytes would help because by drinking too much water I am depleting the electrolytes, but that means Gatorade and Gatorade means SUGAR!! I am not willing to make that compromise - KWIM?

So my questions to you are:

1. Have you had similar experiences?

2. When does the several trips to the bathroom subside? How long does it take your body to get used to the additional water?

3. Any other electrolyte suggestions?

TIA

Amy

I drink smartwater. Which has electrolytes w/o the calories & sugar. I understand about the gatorade. Even G2 has 1-2 ww points per 8oz serving. So I switched to smartwater to get those electrolytes after a long workout.

btw- great attitude about the vegas vacation, and great advice.

~bree~

 

[zoegirl]

I actually just checked in my pantry to get the nutritional info off of the smartwater bottle. It has no calories or sugar per serving, plus it has magnesium and potassium which might be what your body is needing if you're drinking so much water ( I wish I was that diligent). I also looked and Propel is another sugar-free option for an electrolyte drink you could try.But that has sucralose(sp?) and it's 10 calories per 8oz serving.

 

[Duchie]

Today is rough. I have been at work for 1 1/2 hours and have gone to the washroom 6 times! I feel lethargic and shakey, and overall just weird. I am not asking for diagnosis, but I am wondering if anyone has had similar experiences.

That happened to me when I cut out caffeine. My sister (an RN) told me it was a withdrawl type symptom. In my case, I totally quit cold-turkey so that's probably what happened.

 

[Stacybaeasm]

Mom2Faith - I have a tiny bladder so I totally understand the many trips to the bathroom. I am drinking 120-150 ounces of water a day and sometimes, I am heading to the bathroom every 10 minutes. And I have been doing this for over a month. I keep hoping my body will adapt, but I fear I am going to have to cut back on water soon. Once I start rehearsals and performances, I can't leave every 10 minutes. Hang in there. I'm told the body balances out eventually but I'm still waiting. As for your other symptoms, I don't know. Did you quit caffeine cold turkey? Were you consuming a lot of it before you quit? I was drinking 2 or more liters of Diet Coke daily when I stopped cold turkey. I had your same symptoms for a while until my body detoxed. If you know that's not it, you may want to see a doctor.

Sorry I haven't been around much this week. I'm feeling really down about life, weight loss, everything so I haven't been much fun to be around. I"m hoping to pull out of it soon. We'll see. Meanwhile, I have managed not to eat my depression away. I know that would just make things worse because I know it is the scale that is at the root of this one.

 

[mom2faith]

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[mom2faith]

So I splurged a little on my calories at lunch and went and got a Cafe Mocha. The caffiene and sugar combo is making me feel much better already. I think it was too much water...

Anyways, just had to update. I ordered the Jillian Michaels 30 Day shred on the weekend and DH and I agreed that we would do it together every morning for 30 days as soon as it arrived. It was out of stock and supposed to ship in 2 weeks. Perfect, just enough time to really get my calories under control.

But, darn it, it came TODAY!! Now I HAVE to work out - LOL!!

Actually we are going to start right after we get home from Vegas. I really want to commit the 30 days to this and I know me - if I start for 5 days and then stop for 5 days I will never start again!! So Jillian Michaels 30 Day Shred Start day is May 10th. I CAN AND WILL DO IT...right???

UPDATE: I am watching the DVD right now and I am sweating just watching it!! OY!! What have I gotten into!!

 

[enchanted_moonstone]

Hi everyone!! I've got to catch up with all this reading as I have been too tired after work to do more than read a few odd bits and ends.... I'm starting to get really demoralised I can't seem to knuckle down and diet properly. As soon as someone offers some 'naughty' food, I can't resist. I worked this week (I'm a receptionist part time atm) as I was covering someone's holiday time, so I was sitting most of the day, and then eating a sandwich for dinner because it was quick and easy. I was missing breakfast since I was just didn't have the time (couldn't be bothered more like lol) to fix anything. I haven't really gained any, but then I haven't lost much either. I've maybe lost a pound in a couple of weeks - which I don't mind!! I'd rather lose some than nothing, but I've had a phone call from my new doctor today saying I need to go in for a medical tomorrow and I know they're going to give me the, "You are obese, you need to diet" and although I know I am.... I hate other people telling me - it feels like a personal dig at me after years of having people say mean things about my weight etc. I thought I'd have lost more weight than I have before having to go to my new doctors and doing all their health checks etc
Sorry for ranting - I'm just scared about tomorrow and the dreaded weigh in at the doctors

I Hope you are all good and getting on ok!!!

 

[tlenzendorf]

Sorry I haven't been around much this week. I'm feeling really down about life, weight loss, everything so I haven't been much fun to be around. I"m hoping to pull out of it soon. We'll see. Meanwhile, I have managed not to eat my depression away. I know that would just make things worse because I know it is the scale that is at the root of this one.

Hang in there Stacy! Post away, we're here for you!

 

[gellybean]

NEVER thought I would ever say that!!

Here is a little background: prior to watching my weight I drank about 48 oz a day give or take. I also had a lot of salt and other crap in my system, so I often felt thristy.

Now, I drink about 10 to 12 glasses or 80 to 96 oz per day. I do this easily and it is not forced. I fill up my water bottles and sip away until they are gone, often not even realizing how much I have drank. I have also cut back on sodium and caffiene which I know dehydrates you. And, so far I do not excersize other than normal daily activity (not yet anyways - LOL).

Today is rough. I have been at work for 1 1/2 hours and have gone to the washroom 6 times! I feel lethargic and shakey, and overall just weird. I am not asking for diagnosis, but I am wondering if anyone has had similar experiences.

From my limited google searching I found that adding electrolytes would help because by drinking too much water I am depleting the electrolytes, but that means Gatorade and Gatorade means SUGAR!! I am not willing to make that compromise - KWIM?

So my questions to you are:

1. Have you had similar experiences?

2. When does the several trips to the bathroom subside? How long does it take your body to get used to the additional water?

3. Any other electrolyte suggestions?

TIA

Amy

Sounds like you're low on other things you need. Your blood sugar could be bottoming out too!! Be careful! Glad the cafe mocha helped!

I drink smartwater. Which has electrolytes w/o the calories & sugar. I understand about the gatorade. Even G2 has 1-2 ww points per 8oz serving. So I switched to smartwater to get those electrolytes after a long workout.

btw- great attitude about the vegas vacation, and great advice.

~bree~

I'm gonna have to try Smart Water now!! Sounds like a great 'treat' to mix things up a bit.

Mom2Faith - I have a tiny bladder so I totally understand the many trips to the bathroom. I am drinking 120-150 ounces of water a day and sometimes, I am heading to the bathroom every 10 minutes. And I have been doing this for over a month. I keep hoping my body will adapt, but I fear I am going to have to cut back on water soon. Once I start rehearsals and performances, I can't leave every 10 minutes. Hang in there. I'm told the body balances out eventually but I'm still waiting. As for your other symptoms, I don't know. Did you quit caffeine cold turkey? Were you consuming a lot of it before you quit? I was drinking 2 or more liters of Diet Coke daily when I stopped cold turkey. I had your same symptoms for a while until my body detoxed. If you know that's not it, you may want to see a doctor.

Sorry I haven't been around much this week. I'm feeling really down about life, weight loss, everything so I haven't been much fun to be around. I"m hoping to pull out of it soon. We'll see. Meanwhile, I have managed not to eat my depression away. I know that would just make things worse because I know it is the scale that is at the root of this one.

Stacy! Hang in there! Don't think you have to be feeling 'fun to be around' to post. Lord knows I've posted my issues, worries, concerns, down in the dumps on here. We're here to listen to all of it, not just the funny happy stuff! That's awesome that you managed to not eat the depression away! Huge victory!

So I splurged a little on my calories at lunch and went and got a Cafe Mocha. The caffiene and sugar combo is making me feel much better already. I think it was too much water...

Anyways, just had to update. I ordered the Jillian Michaels 30 Day shred on the weekend and DH and I agreed that we would do it together every morning for 30 days as soon as it arrived. It was out of stock and supposed to ship in 2 weeks. Perfect, just enough time to really get my calories under control.

But, darn it, it came TODAY!! Now I HAVE to work out - LOL!!

Actually we are going to start right after we get home from Vegas. I really want to commit the 30 days to this and I know me - if I start for 5 days and then stop for 5 days I will never start again!! So Jillian Michaels 30 Day Shred Start day is May 10th. I CAN AND WILL DO IT...right???

UPDATE: I am watching the DVD right now and I am sweating just watching it!! OY!! What have I gotten into!!

Sounds like a challenge for sure!! Can't wait to hear how it goes once you get it in!

Hi everyone!! I've got to catch up with all this reading as I have been too tired after work to do more than read a few odd bits and ends.... I'm starting to get really demoralised I can't seem to knuckle down and diet properly. As soon as someone offers some 'naughty' food, I can't resist. I worked this week (I'm a receptionist part time atm) as I was covering someone's holiday time, so I was sitting most of the day, and then eating a sandwich for dinner because it was quick and easy. I was missing breakfast since I was just didn't have the time (couldn't be bothered more like lol) to fix anything. I haven't really gained any, but then I haven't lost much either. I've maybe lost a pound in a couple of weeks - which I don't mind!! I'd rather lose some than nothing, but I've had a phone call from my new doctor today saying I need to go in for a medical tomorrow and I know they're going to give me the, "You are obese, you need to diet" and although I know I am.... I hate other people telling me - it feels like a personal dig at me after years of having people say mean things about my weight etc. I thought I'd have lost more weight than I have before having to go to my new doctors and doing all their health checks etc
Sorry for ranting - I'm just scared about tomorrow and the dreaded weigh in at the doctors

I Hope you are all good and getting on ok!!!

I hate doctors telling me to lose weight too. Even though I *know* it, it hurts to hear it. Glad you checked back in!!




I've been doing some research on the bodybugg site and was able to figure out my basic caloric need, my resting metabolic rate, what they want me to consume and what they want me burning. Very interesting. The site is their unofficial site so anyone can do the calculations. I'll get a log in account when the bugg arrives but for now I am playing around. There's a whole thread on their forums devoted to what um bedroom activities yield the most calorie burn. I was cracking up reading it!

The site wanted me to set a 12 wk goal. I put 20 lbs which is still less than 2 lbs a week and it said it was too much. For my weight the most I'm supposed to lose in 12 wks is 17 lbs. I figured my mom's number and she weighs quite a bit less than me and she's not supposed to lose more than 11 lbs in 12 wks. So that made me feel better as far as the rate of weight loss goes.

The site wants me to deficit 700 cals a day to lose the 17 lbs in 12 wks. I'm curious if the actual bodybogg login has yet another goal of calories/needs etc. It seems like every site I read I get a different caloric goal. UGH!

Hope everyone is having a great day!!!