What would you do..............? LONG

[famofsix]

Possibly let it go since the deed is done and they didn't get caught. If your DH chooses not to hang out with them and they ask him why he can tell them how distgusted he is with their behavior. I am suprised he did not confront after it happened not in the store though.

 

[momrek06]

I just don't get the "tattletale" answer from some of the posters.
We are aren't talking about a 6 yr old whining because someone is looking at them ore something. We are talking about 3 grown men who committed a crime.

momrek06...... Is your husband refusing to go to the wedding? If so, I think you owe your friend an explanation. If you don't feel it is your place to "tattle" on her DH and his brothers, you should at least tell her that you DH is upset over something that happened that day. You should not leave her feeling like she has somehow caused a rift in the friendship.

Actually the wedding is in Jamaica and my two DS' are graduating college the same day so we had to decline attending the wedding over a year ago.

I was thinking of possibly saying something to my girlfriend AFTER the May wedding but by then I may also change my mind and just not say anything at all.

 

[The Mystery Machine]

No where did I read that her DH was encouraging the guy to steal the reel.
If he was encouraging it, why would he tell the OP how disgusted he was and that he didn't want to be around the guy anymore?

Not her DH, the DH of the DBFF.

 

[momrek06]

If that had been observed on security tapes and the police called, he would have been considered a co-conspirator (looking at them while they did it, then leaving with them, especially after being given a "signal.")

I don't blame him for not reacting on the spot -- I can't imagine what might have happened if he made a scene. Even if they'd put it back, they could have been caught at THAT point.

How long ago was this? Because he may not be out of the woods yet. If they notice the now incomplete rod and go over their video footage, especially if they suspect/remember the fuss made over the return, they could all still be on the hook (pardon the pun) for this.

This happened yesterday. That is such a good point about the fact they were arguing over the return policy concerning this left handed reel and if indeed it is then noted by store personnel that the reels have been exchanged they may go review the tapes........omg.

 

[The Mystery Machine]

I am so confused. DH is FIRM though....he is basically saying DO NOT INCLUDE ME IN ANY ACTIVTIES INVOLVING THEM ANYMORE......?????

There is your answer as far as I am concerned. I would "tattle" and let the chips fall where they may.

 

[mickeyfan2]

Your DH got in the car with them and just left? He was an accomplice to the crime. At this point I would not say or do anything. The person who should have said or done something was your DH.

Now one can see why the store has this policy.

 

[TaraPA]

I am kind of surprised store security cameras didnt pick this up.

I've worked in retail all my life & VERY rarely are security cameras "monitored" anymore. There's just not enough payroll for this. In my curret retail store we have 2 cameras recording the store & backroom at all times, however that's as far as it goes - onto a tape. It tapes for 48 hours, then rewinds & gets taped over with new footage. Only twice in the last 1 1/2 years have we had incidents where we had to manually go back & review the tapes. And if it's past 48 hours, with our system, your footage is gone.

OP stated this is a big new store, so maybe they do have monitored cameras. But then again like another OP stated, if her DH is observed on the camera leaving with them, indirectly, he is involved.

 

[momrek06]

There is your answer as far as I am concerned. I would "tattle" and let the chips fall where they may.

What just bothers me so much is how professional all three are in the workplace. Each and everyone of them is gainfully employed making large incomes. Upstanding in their places of business.......why do you have to steal? Just is so confusing to me.

Just bring the ENTIRE pole back to the store and BP would have worked with him in replacing the reels.

 

[Nancyg56]

There is your answer as far as I am concerned. I would "tattle" and let the chips fall where they may.

I agree. If you really have this girls best interest at heart, ask yourself how she is going to feel if after they are married her husband is arrested. I bet this behavior will not stop but then she is going to placed in the impossible situation of having her assets tied to his and his liability hers. I dated a man who was accused of theft at work. I was appalled and told him that I was so offended for him. It had not occurred to me that he had actually taken anything. He did. It was the last I ever saw him.

 

[lovemygoofy]

OMG, Kar, this is just ridiculous. These are grown men for heaven's sake knowing that they were stealing. I would so be done with those men. I would also explain it to the BFF because she has a right to know. Would you really want to hang around them knowing what happened and how uncomfortable your husband would be?


Kar, what would you tell one of your sons if they came to you with the same problem?

 

[momrek06]

Your DH got in the car with them and just left? He was an accomplice to the crime. At this point I would not say or do anything. The person who should have said or done something was your DH.

Now one can see why the store has this policy.

I've worked in retail all my life & VERY rarely are security cameras "monitored" anymore. There's just not enough payroll for this. In my curret retail store we have 2 cameras recording the store & backroom at all times, however that's as far as it goes - onto a tape. It tapes for 48 hours, then rewinds & gets taped over with new footage. Only twice in the last 1 1/2 years have we had incidents where we had to manually go back & review the tapes. And if it's past 48 hours, with our system, your footage is gone.

OP stated this is a big new store, so maybe they do have monitored cameras. But then again like another OP stated, if her DH is observed on the camera leaving with them, indirectly, he is involved.

This is one reason why maybe I should say something now................?

 

[momrek06]

I agree. If you really have this girls best interest at heart, ask yourself how she is going to feel if after they are married her husband is arrested. I bet this behavior will not stop but then she is going to placed in the impossible situation of having her assets tied to his and his liability hers. I dated a man who was accused of theft at work. I was appalled and told him that I was so offended for him. It had not occurred to me that he had actually taken anything. He did. It was the last I ever saw him.

This was the bride-to-be's Father and his two Brothers. Bride's Uncles.

 

[mickeyfan2]

This is one reason why maybe I should say something now................?

But why would it help telling the DBFF? The cops or the store maybe but not the DBFF.

Even if he tells your DH may still be in trouble. I have no experience in this thing and I am not sure that to do. I might call my lawyer and ask him/her what to do. You need to protect your DH right now and not worry about tattling to the DBFF.

 

[momrek06]

OMG, Kar, this is just ridiculous. These are grown men for heaven's sake knowing that they were stealing. I would so be done with those men. I would also explain it to the BFF because she has a right to know. Would you really want to hang around them knowing what happened and how uncomfortable your husband would be?


Kar, what would you tell one of your sons if they came to you with the same problem?

Tina: My oldest DS met up with us at the shower as his DFiance was there with me. When the 4 men arrived at 3pm, DH told DS. DS and DF left at 4pm as they had other plans. At 7pm as we are driving home, DS calls my cell and asks if I have left the party and can I talk and I said yes, he said "Mom, did dad tell you what happened at BP?" I said "yes" and DS said "SCUMBAGS all of them". I agreed. DS is now saying as well, he wants nothing to do with them ANY of them.

We have been best friends since 9th grade. Best friend and her DH and I all went to high school together. We will be celebrating our 35th H.S. Reunion in May. (They cannot go they will still be in Jamaica). That is how long I have been friends with her.

 

[lovemygoofy]

Tina: My oldest DS met up with us at the shower as his DFiance was there with me. When the 4 men arrived at 3pm, DH told DS. DS and DF left at 4pm as they had other plans. At 7pm as we are driving home, DS calls my cell and asks if I have left the party and can I talk and I said yes, he said "Mom, did dad tell you what happened at BP?" I said "yes" and DS said "SCUMBAGS all of them". I agreed. DS is now saying as well, he wants nothing to do with them ANY of them.

We have been best friends since 9th grade. Best friend and her DH and I all went to high school together. We will be celebrating our 35th H.S. Reunion in May. (They cannot go they will still be in Jamaica). That is how long I have been friends with her.

At least talk to her, Kar. You aren't going to be able just be around her acting like nothing is wrong. At some point she might question why your husband doesn't want to be around them or at least her husband.

If nothing else, and the service people at the store get suspicious, it would give your BFF a heads up when she goes back to work at the store.

 

[momrek06]

But why would it help telling the DBFF? The cops or the store maybe but not the DBFF.

Even if he tells your DH may still be in trouble. I have no experience in this thing and I am not sure that to do. I might call my lawyer and ask him/her what to do. You need to protect your DH right now and not worry about tattling to the DBFF.

This is why this is so confusing. DH was never a party to this activity and if he is spotted on surveillance camera leaving the store with these JERKS......

 

[Dr.Girlfriend]

There were WAY too many letters in this post for me to understand. DD, DBFF, DWTHDTM...

 

[Nancyg56]

This was the bride-to-be's Father and his two Brothers. Bride's Uncles.

Oh. I got confused here. I'm sorry. I would still tell your friend what your DH saw and explain that as a family you are all uncomfortable with this. The whole thing is crazy, isn't it? Grown men stealing and around someone they really don't know.

 

[MareQ]

This is why this is so confusing. DH was never a party to this activity and if he is spotted on surveillance camera leaving the store with these JERKS......

Yup - he could get in trouble because he was part of the theft. He didn't steal it - but he saw it, he knew about it and he did nothing to stop it or make it right.

Different level of wrong - but he's still wrong.

 

[ang]

OMG, Kar, this is just ridiculous. These are grown men for heaven's sake knowing that they were stealing. I would so be done with those men. I would also explain it to the BFF because she has a right to know. Would you really want to hang around them knowing what happened and how uncomfortable your husband would be?

Kar, what would you tell one of your sons if they came to you with the same problem?

I totally agree,
kar, do you want your DH hanging around these guys? Do you want to hang around them? I don't care what kind of job they have I would not want to hang around them.
Tell your girl friend...if she is your best friend forever, then whats the problem.
Stand by your DH!