what do you think? advice on how to do this!

[Tink&PirateMama]

Hi and Thank you in advance for your advice!

I'm planning a vow renewal. Our plans were to renew our vows just us and our kids (and the photographer) at discovery cove, and beforehand we have a private dining breakfast planned at GF. We were hoping we could do the Grand one in the evening, but we'll see where things end up.

Anyway, this summer my kids got really sick, and in the midst of it I had a dream... and well, I wont get into it all here, but I realized after I think I am going to invite some family/friends. Even if only a couple of people are able to make it, we're planning to invite them. My DH is on board with this idea.

So here's my questions:
1. I haven't ever sent out invitations (we eloped!)- but I know I need to send out a save the date right away- it's in 4.5 months! Can I do that by email?? Would it be tacky?? My thought was I could send a nice email, with a link to our website, and then for the people who are maybes or yes's, I could send a more formal invite? Or do you send the paper invites to the no's too? The thing is I kinda need to know, by early October who's thinking they'll come so I know what to do about the boat/reception.

Which leads me to question 2.
If I have less than 12 people show, which I'd expect, then I was thinking I'd stick with the grand one, and then I'd keep my plans the same, and if we can afford it, I'd pay for their DC tickets. If we have like 20 or more show, I'd have to do something entirely different, and I'm not sure what! So how do I say nicely, I need to know by October first if you think you will come? Is that ok to do in a save the date, or do I do that in an invite?

So confusing!! I honestly don't have a clue who might show up at all! I'm guessing right now I'd have 2-4 people, besides us 4. But who knows!!

And, apparently, if we don't have a lot come down, so many are now interested in being a part of this, we will be having a party here! So much for my simple plans!!

Thank you for your advice!

 

[PrincessShea]

This is really difficult to answer because it depends on your relationship with these people and how close/honest you are with them.

Personally I would just ask. In fact I really didn't even need invitations but just wanted a craft project. If you aren't close enough where its awkward just calling them and asking, then send an invitation.

 

[pezaddict231]

We're sending a Save the Date magnet along with a newsletter, a card with our email address and website and a Pre-RSVP postcard (the last two things were free through Vista print!).

I'm hoping this will give us a better idea of who really plans to come since so far everyone says they're coming. Even if people say no, I'll probably still send an invite, in case their situation changes. Maybe they think they couldn't afford it now, but then as the date gets closer they really want to go.

I agree with PrincessShea, if you're close to these people, you could just ask them and see if they think they might come. Then you could send a formal invite later if you wanted to.

 

[Tink&PirateMama]

This is really difficult to answer because it depends on your relationship with these people and how close/honest you are with them.

Personally I would just ask. In fact I really didn't even need invitations but just wanted a craft project. If you aren't close enough where its awkward just calling them and asking, then send an invitation.

Oh- that makes sense! I think some we could just ask, but it might be easier with a few to send out an invite... especially a couple family members who get confused with dates! LOL!

We're sending a Save the Date magnet along with a newsletter, a card with our email address and website and a Pre-RSVP postcard (the last two things were free through Vista print!).

I'm hoping this will give us a better idea of who really plans to come since so far everyone says they're coming. Even if people say no, I'll probably still send an invite, in case their situation changes. Maybe they think they couldn't afford it now, but then as the date gets closer they really want to go.

I agree with PrincessShea, if you're close to these people, you could just ask them and see if they think they might come. Then you could send a formal invite later if you wanted to.

I have always loved save the date magnets! So much that I had thought I would send out magnets afterwards with one of the vow renewal pictures on it... however I didn't think about doing it now ahead of time.... That's another good idea!!

I will have to get back to updating the PJ and I'll try to make a decision on this and get them out before the first of september!

Thank you ladies!

 

[29apr00]

IMO with only 4.5 months until a destination ceremony, i'd skip the STD and just send out the invite. it's ok to send the invite a little more in advance for a destination as people will need to rearrange work and school schedules, as book travel. So just do the invite now and have the RSVP date for October.

 

[29apr00]

Oh yeah....and i hope the kids are doing better!! I don't even want to think about your dream.

 

[tommymomo]

i wouldnt worry how you decide to do it, I am sure your family ans friends wont care. Save the date, no save the date, no big deal. I would just send out hre invites early and get the ball rolling. Keep it simple, since that is waht you want it to be anyway.

good luck and I hope everything works out for ya

 

[Tink&PirateMama]

IMO with only 4.5 months until a destination ceremony, i'd skip the STD and just send out the invite. it's ok to send the invite a little more in advance for a destination as people will need to rearrange work and school schedules, as book travel. So just do the invite now and have the RSVP date for October.

Thanks- that makes a lot of sense!

Oh yeah....and i hope the kids are doing better!! I don't even want to think about your dream.

They are SO much better- thank you for asking!!

i wouldnt worry how you decide to do it, I am sure your family ans friends wont care. Save the date, no save the date, no big deal. I would just send out hre invites early and get the ball rolling. Keep it simple, since that is waht you want it to be anyway.

good luck and I hope everything works out for ya

Good point!! You know, this didn't occur to me until now, but besides one or two people, I bet no one really cares, LOL!! Thanks for that!

 

[Tink_Kel]

We were hoping we could do the Grand one in the evening, but we'll see where things end up.

Hi! So exciting, you're almost there! Sorry, I don't have any advise about the invites, etc. Like you, we just had a small intimate affair.

Anyway, just wanted to give you an opinion of the Grand One....not that my opinions are always great or anything! Our experience, after our small ceremony, breakfast, and parks, we were totally EXHAUSTED by the time dinner came around. We forced ourselves to keep our dinner reservations, because it was wedding night. I know you guys are going to start early too. Just something to think about...personally, if I were to spend the extra money on the Grand One, I would book it a different night, so we'd be well rested, and appreciate the experience more.

 

[mrsscooter]

I agree with the other posters.........because its so close....just send out the actual invites, and dont be shy about just coming out and asking people whether or not they are seriouse about coming, and you can be honest and tell them that you would like to pay for their tickets, but need to know what to budget for. I see that your renewal is coming fast..........just remember to breath deep and relax, you will be in Disney, so everything is fabulouse and stress free!!! Congtrats!!!!!!!!!

 

[Tink&PirateMama]

Let me update and I have some responses for you!

This weekend we did get in touch with some people, and, just as before, it's just too hard for them to make it for various reasons. So we're back to our original plans....

EXCEPT this is new- we are planning an event when we get back to celebrate with them. I'm thinking to have them involved in the VR itself, I'm going to send out an email link, maybe with a save the date for our party back home, and the link to our website and send out some videos and pictures from our trip as updates... then, from there, we will do a video announcement as our actual 'invitation' ! Anyway, then they will all feel a part of the celebrations, without actually having to come down there. And to be honest, I'm really relieved... I think having it just be us and our kids is how I truly wanted it... and my daughter even came to me and said she thought it should just be us. So it's worked out great

And I also realized it's like 4 months away and I have a billion things to do beforehand, LOL!! I haven't even lookeda t my PJ since before my kids got sick! Yikes!! So I've been making lists and ordering things... and it's so exciting!!

Hi! So exciting, you're almost there! Sorry, I don't have any advise about the invites, etc. Like you, we just had a small intimate affair.

Anyway, just wanted to give you an opinion of the Grand One....not that my opinions are always great or anything! Our experience, after our small ceremony, breakfast, and parks, we were totally EXHAUSTED by the time dinner came around. We forced ourselves to keep our dinner reservations, because it was wedding night. I know you guys are going to start early too. Just something to think about...personally, if I were to spend the extra money on the Grand One, I would book it a different night, so we'd be well rested, and appreciate the experience more.

Thank you so much for this advice! I wrote out a 'timeline' along with a list of all the things I need to start working on in the next 2 months... and when I look at the timeline, I think we'll be tired out too!! We do start early, with our breakfast at 8. But, my DH is now, after looking at it all, really wanting to do the grand one! And our photographer will come that night, but if we do it another night, I'm not sure we could have her there... certainly not at the price and hours we would do with an all in one day affair. So I'm completely confused as to what I will do!! But I really appreciate your advice as one who's gone through it! I only have about a month to decide on this... so hopefully I will sort it out soon!

I agree with the other posters.........because its so close....just send out the actual invites, and dont be shy about just coming out and asking people whether or not they are seriouse about coming, and you can be honest and tell them that you would like to pay for their tickets, but need to know what to budget for. I see that your renewal is coming fast..........just remember to breath deep and relax, you will be in Disney, so everything is fabulouse and stress free!!! Congtrats!!!!!!!!!

Thank you We absolutely can not wait to be at Disney again! I'm getting so excited about it!!