I'm sorry you have that.
I have fibromyalgia and lupus as well (and sjogren's syndrome and RA). Doesn't it suck when your immune system hates you?
Listen, the best advice I can give you is to shop around for doctors who are understanding. Given that you have multiple issues going on, you don't want or need a doctor who isn't going to make an effort to treat your pain symptoms. These days a lot of doctors are so scared to give out pain killers that they leave people suffering. That isn't cool. For me, the first line of defense against pain is always a nice, hot shower. I take Aleve twice a day. I take Neurontin for pain, which has worked VERY well for me with no side effects (not everybody is as lucky as I am with that drug). I exercise. When I feel well, I use a mini-trampoline and when I feel like crap I make sure I at least get on the exercise bike for a few minutes. Some exercise is better than no exercise! It loosens up those stiff muscles and joints!!! But sometimes, all that fails and I take vicodin on the bad days. Without them, I wouldn't be able to live a normal life. I feel terrible for those who have doctors who won't budge on that issue.
I also make regular use of a massager (if you have a Walgreens near you, there are wonderful massagers that you can place in your office chair and it massages your back...NICE) and heating pads. Since you spend a lot of time at your computer, you really need to have a nice comfortable office chair! If you don't have one that supports your back, go get one!
Sleep is important and most people with fibromyalgia lack it. The body heals while it sleeps, so if you can make yourself sleep, you must do so. Those of us who don't work outside the home are lucky because we can sleep whenever the urge strikes. I work at home, which gives me the flexibility to sleep when I want. I'm very lucky in that way! If you don't have that flexibility and are struggling with sleep, melatonin has worked for a lot of people. And there is a new prescription sleep pill that is supposedly non-addictive called Lunestra. Doesn't work for me at all, but some say it works wonders for them. Resteril and Ambian are two other sleeping aids that really work. Ambien especially knocks me out! But you can't use them ore than 2-3 days a week. Oh, and if you get a lot of neck pain, orthopedic pillows are a must! Just remember, sleep is
very important to people who are chronically ill.
Physical therapy helps some people. And if you have access, pool therapy is really the best thing in the world! Water is so soothing for fibro-people. Oh, and
here is a fibromyalgia resource center with a chatroom and a message board. There's a lot of info there, but I've found the people to be a little pessimistic for my taste. I wish they would talk about non-medical things too so people could get to know one another. It's nice to make friends with people who have these diseases because we understand one another and can talk when things get bad, but I don't really want to base a friendship on
only being sick....if that makes any sense. It's nice to forget it when I can! Still, the message board is a good place to ask questions. I think there is also a lupus board over there, too.
Another thing, it is really important for your family to understand what you are going through. I'm lucky in that I have a really supportive family. I'm hoping you do as well! If they have difficulty understanding, you can contact the lupus and fibromyalgia resource centers closest to you and request information packs for family and friends. Most lupus centers also have fibro info. Also, consider support groups if you feel they may be able to help you!
There are some good books about Fibromyalgia out there. People say
this book is really good. And I have an earlier edition of
this one and found it to be very informative! Other than having a good doctor, educating yourself, and exercising, I recommend eating a healthy well-balanced diet, trying to reduce stress, and do everything in your power to not let it take over your life. It is so easy to give into it, especially when you are bombarded with multiple issues. I know for me, being told I was positive for lupus was the one that nearly pushed me over the edge. I honestly wanted to die. But I got past it quickly and am now back to being optimistic and hopeful.
I've just thrown a lot of info at you! I hope it isn't too much. I've been dealing with all this for several years now. And I've learned a few things so I like to pass the info on when I can!
Good luck to you!
It sucks, but you learn to live with it! If you ever want to talk, I'm a PM away!
Try a search this topic. 
