- Mar 13, 2015
Yes I agree about the enabling part People feel comfortable and validated by their food choices if others copy them ie when you go to Mcdonalds, it makes people uncomfortable if you order the salad with water while they get a Big Mac Meal with a Large Coke. They see it as a judgement on their food choice, not that you enjoy their company but just don't want to eat a burger.I think sometimes it's the enabling part. If people I go out are overweight and overeat, I can overeat and not feel guilty about it. If they stop, it leaves me asking myself are my food choices and portion sizes sensible and if you don't want ot play part of the ritual of overeating, you are not fun anymore.
You can't control how will they react, it's up to you to set up boundaries and control your reactions. But hopefully they accept the new you, but it is not your job to let go of your dreams and goals to please them. It is not your job to eat so they feel better about their own eating. it's your job to eat for your enjoyment and health and goals - that has to be clear
I dealt with it alot in my teens and twenties, when I was out in bars and clubs and had the typical college social life, but I didn't drink alcohol. At the start it made my friends very uncomfortable, that they would get drunk and I wasn't. But I had my reasons and after the first few times it was fine. I went to bars and clubs as I enjoyed the social life, I just didn't want to get drunk like everyone else. It worked out good for everyone, I still enjoyed myself and my friends knew that we would get home safe, as I bundled everyone into a taxi at the end of the night and no one lost a coat or handbag