Wedding invite- unclear about bringing a guest

[Nom]

I just got a wedding invitation sent to me by one of my daughter's friends mom who I am relatively close to. The outside address envelope had my name (I live alone).

I am used to seeing an inner envelope that would say 'name and guest' if you could bring a guest, or just 'name' if you could not bring a guest, but there was no inner envelope. The reply has a place to fill in how many guests will be attending, but that is a pre-printed, standard reply card.

So what do you think- am I able to bring a guest? TIA for your opinions!

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

On a wedding invite, if not directly stated -- the invite is just for one.

For clarity, I actually included it on the outside envelope for my wedding so that it was known before they opened the envelope.

On any invite, unless directly stated--you don't assume you can bring someone.

 

[Scurvy]

I just got a wedding invitation sent to me by one of my daughter's friends mom who I am relatively close to. The outside address envelope had my name (I live alone).

I am used to seeing an inner envelope that would say 'name and guest' if you could bring a guest, or just 'name' if you could not bring a guest, but there was no inner envelope. The reply has a place to fill in how many guests will be attending, but that is a pre-printed, standard reply card.

So what do you think- am I able to bring a guest? TIA for your opinions!

I would assume that I was invited alone if I got an invitation like that.

 

[Christine]

I would assume that you could not bring a guest.

 

[Nom]

Ugh- I won't know anyone at the wedding, so I was hoping that was not the case (although I was leaning in the direction that it was). oh well!

 

[Jennasis]

No guest. Just you.

 

[vettechick99]

Boo! Who invites a person to a wedding without allowing them to invite a guest along? I think it pretty rude.

 

[krcit]

Boo! Who invites a person to a wedding without allowing them to invite a guest along? I think it pretty rude.

Me too! I think anyone over the age of 18 should be invited with a guest.

 

[marlynnp]

And I'm sure there are plenty of people that would say anyone over the age of 18 should have enough social skills to attend a function for a few hours unaccompanied.

Unless you are in a serious relarionship with someone I don't think it is rude to be invited as a single. If you don't want to attend alone, send your regrets.

 

[bumbershoot]

The invite is from your "daughter's friends mom who I am relatively close to". So you'll know them.

I bet you'll have fun, meeting people you wouldn't otherwise have met if you brought a guest. Bringing a guest when the guest doesn't know anyone tends to isolate you as a couple, I've found at least.

 

[DisneyFan32WI]

No guest. Just you.

Ditto.

 

[Sarah_Rose]

From what I've experienced, "and guest" is not really standard anymore, unless it's a very large wedding. From what I've heard, you have to invite the person's spouse/fiance/live-in-partner, but beyond that it is not considered rude to not allow a guest.

For our wedding, we allowed for a guest for people who we knew the name of their partner (ie. had heard this person mentioned in conversation at some point during the time we knew them) or else if it was someone that wouldn't know anyone else at the wedding. So, for example, we invited a large group of my friends from grad school, knowing that they would enjoy getting together and seeing each other at the wedding. If I knew the name of the person that they were dating (or, obviously, if they were married or engaged) or knew that they were at that point seeing someone, I invited the "guest". If I did not, I did not add "and guest", knowing that the group of friends would all hang out together anyway, so they wouldn't feel out of place. Most of the "and guests" decided not to go, anyway, to be honest. Apparently no one wants to hang out around a group of crazy history majors who haven't seen each other in a few years.

Anyway, I would interpret the invitation as "no guest". It's not a particularly friendly thing to do, but I don't think it's considered rude anymore (if you're not married/engaged/in a relationship that is generally known) to not allow guests, at least in the weddings that I've been involved with.

 

[Scurvy]

Anyway, I would interpret the invitation as "no guest". It's not a particularly friendly thing to do, but I don't think it's considered rude anymore (if you're not married/engaged/in a relationship that is generally known) to not allow guests, at least in the weddings that I've been involved with.

No, it isn't considered rude. According to traditional etiquette there isn't an expectation that people who aren't part of an established social unit will be invited with a guest. It is more popular to include guests in some areas than others, I'm sure, but according to etiquette it's fine to invite people without guests.

 

[Boxley]

Boo! Who invites a person to a wedding without allowing them to invite a guest along? I think it pretty rude.

Those whose budget cannot really afford to have every adult bring a guest. There are always some consideration. I think if the Bridal couple or family does not really know if one of the the guests is dating someone or not or even know the "guest" there isn't an expectation for them to add a plus one.

 

[pigletgirl]

No, its not rude. They may be having a sitdown and have it made for a specific amount of people.

And no, if you could bring a guest it would of said it straight up.

 

[mjkacmom]

Those whose budget cannot really afford to have every adult bring a guest. There are always some consideration. I think if the Bridal couple or family does not really know one of the guest is dating someone or not or even know the "guest" there isn't an expectation for them to add a plus one.

And I think that in the case of "bride's mother's friend," this must be the case. FYI, MIL insisted we invite about 20 of her friends - not only did they not come, but they RSVP'd at the last minute. I wish they had done it right away - there were people we wanted at our wedding, but our venue only held a certain amount.

 

[disykat]

I always interpret the (& guest) when they are unattached as "bring a random stranger to my wedding." I turned down every invitation I received to be a date to a wedding as a single person. Why would I want to go to a stranger's wedding? DH and I didn't start attending weddings with each other to people we didn't know until we were engaged.

I can see if the wedding is a huge party. It makes sense to bring a date to a party. But a smaller wedding and basic reception doesn't seem like a date event to me. I was surprised on the other "& guest" thread where people seemed to feel it was okay to invite singles without guests to a large party but never to even a small wedding. I feel the opposite.

 

[a1tinkfans]

Ugh- I won't know anyone at the wedding, so I was hoping that was not the case (although I was leaning in the direction that it was). oh well!

UGH, I agree...have a good time anyway....

 

[cm8]

If you decide to go have a blast!!!

 

[acourtwdw]

Can you call and ask? That may be the easiest solution....