Wedding dilema

[BriarfoxinWA]

So my nephew got married and had their reception at a very nice country club in the LA area. When we arrived for the reception & dinner there was a gift table set outside in a breezeway between the golf pro shop and the main building. Everyone had to pass by this on the way to the patio for cocktails. My DH and DSis and I all were concerned about the gift table being out in the open and the fact that there was no attendant to keep an eye on things. We held on to our card, since there was $100 cash in it, and went down to mingle. When it was time for dinner we came back by the table and decided to go ahead and put our card in the box with the others. We noticed that there was a table inside with gifts on it later so we assumed that they had moved everything in from outside. My sister loaded up everything from inside the hall and took it home with her immediately after the dinner was over.

Well that was 2 weeks ago. Nephew and new bride came home from their honeymoon and opened their gifts on Sunday. I got an email from my DSis yesterday asking if we had left a card for the kids. ...well... I'm sure you've guess it... The outside table that had about 25-30 cards and half a dozen gifts is unaccounted for. I told my DSis to contact the wedding planner (it was her idea to put the table outside and they had an additional table inside) and to contact the country club to see if there were gifts that had been left there. . DSis checked with the mother of the bride and she is clueless. We also talked about matching the guest list with the gifts received and notifying anyone that she didn't get a gift from.

Any other suggestions on what can be done at this point We are all just sick about it.

 

[kelleigh1]

Yikes!

I'm sorry, but I'd be furious with that wedding planner. Putting a gift table outside was a very bad idea. When we had our reception, our "gift table" was right next to our sweetheart table and in direct line of sight of the table where our parents were seated.

Have they contacted the reception site? Were there any type of security cameras in the area? Unfortunately I'd say that those gifts are gone never to be seen again.

I also made our card box which was in the shape of a wedding cake. I put a slot in the top layer of the 3-layer "cake" and the cards fell to the bottom layer. Nobody was going to be able to sneak an envelope out of it. We brought it back to our hotel room after the reception and we literally had to cut it open in order to get the cards out.

 

[Tricia819]

Wow...that wedding planner must've been a real amateur.

 

[Carly_Roach]

I don't think there's really anything that can be done at this time. The time to do something would have been at the reception.

Maybe the guests who had their gifts to the couple stolen could fill out police reports, but even then it's unlikely the couple will see any compensation for that. I'm sure the country club had the wedding planner sign a statement stating the CC wouldn't be responsible for theft or accidents.

I'm sorry to hear about this. Some people (even wedding planners) just don't have common sense.

 

[BriarfoxinWA]

I just had an email from my DSis and my nephew basically doesn't want to do anything about it. WTH! I told my DSis that there could be all kinds of problems if they don't at least attempt to contact those that had attended but there was no record of a gift. If they were stolen and any checks were in those envelopes it opens up the gift-giver to identity theft. Just having one check can enable the thief to drain someones bank account.

Not to mention their gifts could be sitting out at the country club waiting for somebody to come get them.

FWIW I was not at all impressed with the wedding planner. The person from the church that assisted the wedding party did more than the planner did.

 

[jel0511]

This happened to my SIL at her wedding. Luckily for her the reception hall reimbursed them for their "stolen" gifts and even paid them back for any stop payment fees on checks. They had to do the matching game with the guest list, and call everyone who's gift was missing. Ours was one missing.... It eventually ended up one of the employees of the hall stole their gifts. I don't think they prosecuted though.....

 

[daisax]

Never ever ever take gifts to the wedding -- they go to the bride's home BEFORE the wedding!

 

[C.Ann]

That's horrible.. And I just have to say it - it was incredibly stupid for that table to be set outside with no one to watch it.. What kind of a bridal planner would come up with such a totally irresponsible idea???

 

[BriarfoxinWA]

That's horrible.. And I just have to say it - it was incredibly stupid for that table to be set outside with no one to watch it.. What kind of a bridal planner would come up with such a totally irresponsible idea???

I agree and I could kick myself because we (my DSis, DH & I) all stood there talking about how it shouldn't be out there unattended and then I left my card there too

 

[C.Ann]

I agree and I could kick myself because we (my DSis, DH & I) all stood there talking about how it shouldn't be out there unattended and then I left my card there too

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I certainly hope the bride and groom gave the bridal planner a stern talking to.. Just awful..

 

[crz4mm2]

Never ever ever take gifts to the wedding -- they go to the bride's home BEFORE the wedding!

This is not true. At least not in our area.... We took our gift to a wedding a couple of weeks ago (reception).

 

[diznygirl]

At the very least they should call the country club to see if the gifts are sitting in a storage room somewhere.

 

[EthansMom]

Never ever ever take gifts to the wedding -- they go to the bride's home BEFORE the wedding!

It's pretty common to take a gift to the wedding reception in many areas.

As the guest, there isn't much you can do. I certainly wouldn't replace the money that was lost/stolen through the neglect of the couple or their employee.

If I was the couple, I would contact the location. There may have been a camera that recorded someone messing with the gifts.

 

[Stacerita]

Never ever ever take gifts to the wedding -- they go to the bride's home BEFORE the wedding!

I have never been to a wedding where this was done.

The wedding planner was just stupid to think that gifts left outside were going to be fine with no one watching them.

 

[agnes!]

Depending on how much is missing, it could be a felony. Have the married couple & the country club contacted the police?

agnes!

 

[daughter_of_amid_chaos]

At our property, we recommend that after dinner the couple or one of the members of their wedding party remove the box containing cards, and all of the gifts if they so choose, and place them in the trunk of a locked car in our parking lot which is watched by our valets or if they are staying on property in their room.

Almost every guest attending weddings at our location brings the presents with them but the location of our gift table is always the same for every wedding specifically because the location can be watched by the front desk manager, the managers in the function, waitstaff, and bartenders.

 

[Disney Doll]

They have to do something. There may be checks floating around out there. If I was invited to this wedding and my check possibly got stolen and no one let me know, I'd be pissed.

The wedding couple should make up a list of everyone who was at the wedding and what gift they gave them...whether a gift or a check. Those from whom they received no gift should be notified that if they put their gift into the "card box", that the "card box" had been stolen, so chances are their gift was stolen. They can add that they are not looking for a gift per se, but just to let the person know that there is a potential that a check they wrote might be in the wrong hands. The gift-giver would probably want to stop payment on the check...I know I would. I'd also cut the couple another check.

I'd also not be paying the wedding planner.

 

[rie'smom]

Never ever ever take gifts to the wedding -- they go to the bride's home BEFORE the wedding!

This is how it's done where we live too. I haven't been to a wedding in probably 20+ years that has had a gift table.

 

[kmp1191]

I have photographed several weddings where gifts were stolen! You would be surprised at the gall of some people! At one wedding...it happened to be a friend of mine...the crook ONLY took the cards with cash in them!! ALL of the cards were open! There were checks in some, but the others were empty. She called me and asked if I had put cash in ours and we had. They had the card, but no cash.
At another wedding, someone went into the brides room (where she and the attendants all got ready) and stole all of thecash & credit cards out of their wallets...along with any cell phones laying around. Then they went to another part of the church where the guys had gotten ready and did the same thing! ALL WHILE THE CEREMONY WAS TAKING PLACE!!
It's a sad, sad world...

 

[wheeler1]

Honestly, my first thought is the wedding planner may somehow be in on this. To set up a table in that location is not just simply stupid, it's suspicious if you ask me.

I wonder if this sort of thing has happened at other weddings this person has planned?