Wedding cancelled, who pays for bridesmaid dress?

[Jeafl]

Not the bride's fault OR the bridesmaids' fault. Maybe the bridesmaids could file a class-action lawsuit against the former groom? Of course I have a feeling that will cost more than the $100 still remaining on the tab.

I don't recall the OP mentioning the groom cheating, so a class action lawsuit may not be a good idea.

In fact, I know of a situation of where the wedding was called off because the bride slept with the best man AND one of the groomsmen. Since this bride gave no explanation in her text it might be a bit premature to assume the reason for the cancellation was the groom cheating. SHE may have been responsible for the wedding being called off...

 

[sonnyjane]

I don't recall the OP mentioning the groom cheating, so a class action lawsuit may not be a good idea. In fact, I know of a situation of where the wedding was called off because the bride slept with the best man AND one of the groomsmen. Since this bride gave no explanation in her text it might be a bit premature to assume the reason for the cancellation was the groom cheating. SHE may have been responsible for the wedding being called off...

I was referring to another poster's story, not the OP. If you read my other posts I made it clear I don't know the cause for the cancellation in the OP. The lawsuit thing was tongue-in-cheek.

 

[Burnedout]

We canceled our wedding. It was just not the right time. We paid for the dresses because I agree with grandly square. My friends were doing me a favor. Besides the last thing I needed was to feel guilty about them.

 

[LilyWDW]

Personally, I think it is tacky as a bride to make the bridesmaids pay for their own dresses. It should be a cost of the wedding that the bride takes into account when they decide how large of a bridal party they should have.

 

[sonnyjane]

Personally, I think it is tacky as a bride to make the bridesmaids pay for their own dresses. It should be a cost of the wedding that the bride takes into account when they decide how large of a bridal party they should have.

Now THIS I could support. I've been in at least half a dozen weddings and have always had to pay for the dress. The J. Crew one was the worst - $385 for a dress I'll never wear again. I think most bridesmaids do cover the cost, though, not the brides. I eloped so didn't have to cross that bridge. I know there exist brides that have paid for the bridesmaids' dresses but I've never known one.

 

[aprilgail2]

Personally, I think it is tacky as a bride to make the bridesmaids pay for their own dresses. It should be a cost of the wedding that the bride takes into account when they decide how large of a bridal party they should have.

out of all the weddings I have been in there were only 2 where the bride paid for the bridesmaids dresses, all the rest we paid for our own. And there was not ONE I would ever wear again. The worst was this pink dress with this giant hoop you wore under it- it was horrible, we did draw the line at carrying parasols though, totally ridiculous.

 

[Cannot_Wait_4Disney]

DD was asked to be a bridesmaid for a friend's wedding in June. A few days ago she received a group text from the bride saying that the wedding is cancelled but the bridesmaid dresses need to be paid for and picked up at the bridal shop. The dress was $165.00 and DD still owes $65.00. The dress is not something she will wear plus she was pregnant when it was ordered and they made her order a much bigger size so the dress will need altering if she ever would wear it. I know being in a wedding is expensive, and that when you agree to participate you are agreeing to the cost. Now that the wedding is cancelled is it fair that the bridesmaids have to pay for a dress that they will not be wearing? She does feel bad for the bride but $165.00 is a lot to pay for a dress that she does not want, does not fit and she probably will never wear.
What do y'all think?

I'd call the shop and see if they'll just resell it. You might not be out anything. Whoever called off the wedding should offer to pay for the dress. But that doesn't always happen.

 

[Hannathy]

Personally, I think it is tacky as a bride to make the bridesmaids pay for their own dresses. It should be a cost of the wedding that the bride takes into account when they decide how large of a bridal party they should have.

Until I was on the Dis I had never heard of a Bride paying for the bridesmaid dresses! And I"m no Spring chicken. I bought my first bridesmaid dress in the 70's.and the last one for my DD to be in my nephews wedding and that was very recently. And that wedding was far from tacky!

 

[richmond282]

Check with the store to see if they'll exchange it for something smaller or another dress. I would really try to work something out with the store, not the bride.

What's the harm in speaking with the store about the dilemma? The worst they can say is "tough luck, pay up."

 

[Breezy_Carol]

Until I was on the Dis I had never heard of a Bride paying for the bridesmaid dresses! And I"m no Spring chicken. I bought my first bridesmaid dress in the 70's.and the last one for my DD to be in my nephews wedding and that was very recently. And that wedding was far from tacky!

I agree. I had never heard of anyone except the bridesmaids paying for the dresses.

 

[Pixiedustaway]

Pay the rest and pick up the dress.
It stinks, but there is really nothing else she can do.

 

[Jennasis]

When my bff in college cancelled her wedding after I bought the bridesmaid's dress, I ate the cost.

 

[Missy1961]

When I worked in bridal, we naturally dealt with cancelled weddings. Most commonly, the bridesmaids paid for the dresses and took them home. Every once in a while, no one would pay and the dresses would just sit there and it would be a loss for the store that we generally could not recoup.

Because... in this state, consumers have lengthy rights to their ordered goods. Legally, we could not send them back (even if the manufacturer accepted returns, which most do not) and we could not sell or re-sell them or even use them as samples. By law, we were required to store the garment with the buyer's name on it, keep it in good condition, and...sit on it for the "grace period" mandated by law. We could send them dunning notices or send it to collections or take them to small claims court.

Our only other alternative was to wait for the grace period to expire at which time we could sell it -- but by which time, most of the dresses would no longer be in style (either by cut or color) and could not be sold, even at steep discounts.

Also, commissions have already been paid on the gown, which means the store is not re-couping its costs if the buyer put a 50% deposit down.

Since I see that a few of you are saying "don't pay for the rest of the dress, the store will make a profit", I thought I'd quote someone who has some facts about the bridal industry. It's not like going to Macy's and putting a down payment on a dress. Most times, manufacturers won't take the dresses back. And at least in the state that this poster is talking about, the store is bound by law to hold on to the dress for a certain amount of time. I do agree that you've got nothing to lose by talking to the store. They may be able to do something. If they can't, pay the balance and sell the dress yourself (Ebay or a consignment shop might work). You might get most if not all of the money back.

And while I agree that a group text wasn't wonderful, I'd cut the bride some slack. We don't know why the wedding was called off. But it can't be easy to call everyone one by one and tell the story over and over.

I've never heard of anyone but the bridesmaids paying for the dresses. And I've been around this planet for a long time. I think it's wonderful that some brides pay but I'd never expect it. And in this case, I bet the almost bride and groom have already paid out a lot of money to the venue, for her dress, etc. Paying for bridesmaid dresses isn't normal their problem.

So I'd pay the balance and move on.

 

[mjkacmom]

Personally, I think it is tacky as a bride to make the bridesmaids pay for their own dresses. It should be a cost of the wedding that the bride takes into account when they decide how large of a bridal party they should have.

I'm going to to out on a limb here, and say that roughly 99.9% of bridesmaids pay for their dresses - I've never heard of the bride paying. They always have the option of saying no when asked to be in the wedding.

I didn't pay for my bridesmaids dresses (I did pay for my niece's flower girl dress), but I had them pick them out (since they had to pay for them and wear them).

 

[NewRVLady]

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I didn't pay for my bridesmaids dresses (I did pay for my niece's flower girl dress), but I had them pick them out (since they had to pay for them and wear them).

I see that as a trend-even weddings where the bride asks each girl to buy a lavender knee high dress-so it is something the girl would actually wear.
DS was in a wedding like this recently and the group shot was lovely-a mix of shades and styles and fabrics.

 

[goofyintoronto]

I'm going to to out on a limb here, and say that roughly 99.9% of bridesmaids pay for their dresses - I've never heard of the bride paying. They always have the option of saying no when asked to be in the wedding.

Yes, same here.

 

[wallawallakids]

I'm going to to out on a limb here, and say that roughly 99.9% of bridesmaids pay for their dresses - I've never heard of the bride paying. They always have the option of saying no when asked to be in the wedding.

I didn't pay for my bridesmaids dresses (I did pay for my niece's flower girl dress), but I had them pick them out (since they had to pay for them and wear them).

I agree. I have been in quite a few weddings and have always purchased the dress. The same when my children have been in weddings. I would assume if one objected to the cost of paying for the dress, then one could decline the offer of being in the wedding.

I think most consider it an honor to be asked and that the cost of the dress is just part of the deal. I have never felt slighted or angry about accepting those costs. Usually they are the smaller cost anyway. As a bridesmaid/maid of honor the cost of throwing the bridal shower far outweighs the cost of the dress. Again, when asked, I accepted this job because I felt it was an honor and I was delighted to do it for my friend. I wasn't sitting around counting money and hoping someday it would even out. Being in a wedding costs money. Beyond dresses, it is shoes, hair, make up, travel expenses, etc. We do it all because we are happy for our friends and want to celebrate with them.

 

[SeaShelley]

Really?? Wow. Cause ever since I was a teen (and im in my late 30's now), i've been to in a dozen wedding parties and NOT ONE bride paid for my dress. Not one. I paid for ALL of my bridesmaid dresses. I guess "the norm" varies depending on where you live?



Yes, same here.

Ummmm....that's what Hannathy said.

 

[goofyintoronto]

Ummmm....that's what Hannathy said.

Good grief. I really shouldnt post on the dis until im 100% better (fighting the flu & cold). I will revise my post. thanks. Lol.

 

[SeaShelley]

Good grief. I really shouldnt post on the dis until im 100% better (fighting the flu & cold). I will revise my post. thanks. Lol.

I was going to say lack of caffine!! Hope you feel better!!