Wednesday, October 15th - Beer? No Thanks, This Time We're Having Tea!
Knowing that we already had plans to break out our emergency vacation stomachs later in the evening at Blue Zoo with some DISfriends, Jay and I deviated somewhat from our traditional afternoon tea pattern. Normally we order the Grand Tea with extra champagne on the side along with some special bakery items and waddle out of the Gardenview Lounge two hours later leaving a trail of gastronomical devastation in our wake. However, on this occasion we both ordered the Buckingham Palace: traditional tea sandwedges, a scone, a jam tart, and a selection of freshly basked pastries or strawberries and cream along with a choice of tea all for the pre-economic recession price of $19.50 per person. The mired-in-the-midst-of-an-economic-depression price actually hasn't changed, but my sources tell me that Disney is now substituting stewed tobacco for tea, churned up bits of golf course clippings for watercress sandwedges, and berries formed from straw. Those intrepid diners who dare to complain have coolly been informed that all changes were in response to guest feedback.
We arrived at the Gardenview Lounge about half-an-hour before our ADR, but we were seated almost immediately. The tea room was busy on the afternoon that we were there and our waitress was a little ... distracted, to put it kindly. She was actually one of the worst servers we've ever had at the gardenview and I will never forgive her for not giving me the one thing that I always always always add to my tea, even after I requested it
twice.
Our tea was delivered to our table in relatively short order; I chose my absolute favorite herbal tea of all time - chamomile. The Grand Floridian's tea menu actually calls it Chamomile Flowers - a tranquil and calming herbal infusion of sweet and fragrant golden chamomile blossoms combined for a mild and sweet taste; it has a soft and musty aroma combined with a smooth, apple-like finish.
A French press ... again
Something's missing ...
Sigh.
I know I ranted about this last year in my afternoon tea review but I feel compelled to do so once more. I do not want my tea served in a French press!! It does nothing to prevent tea leaf floaties from still finding their way into my teacup and it completely ruins the aesthetic of the tea table. And look at the press itself ... even after all these months I still can't decide if it's actually clean because the chrome and glass are so spotted. Honestly, haven't the folks at the Grand Floridian heard of all the products out there that eliminate hard water spots? Or here's an idea ... how about washing those French presses by hand and making sure they're properly dried???
And finally ... where's the fun of having tea without a tea pot? I have five nieces under the age of twelve and as their eccentric but generous Auntie Crohn I've purchased a few tea sets over years and I'm here to tell you that none of them come with a French press in lieu of a porcelain tea pot.
That is all.
Oh, wait.
No it isn't.
I asked our server-lady for some milk for my tea. I always add milk and sugar to my tea ... that's just how I like it. And do you know what she said to me?
"We've been told not to give milk to guests ... it will curdle when they add it to their hot tea."
After a moment of stunned silence, I replied, "I'm willing to take the chance on chunky tea. May I please have a small pitcher of milk?"
"No."
And she walked away.
I suppose I could have complained after I asked her for milk a second time and was refused again, but what difference would it have made? Has anyone without children ever thrown a temper tantrum in the Gardenview Lounge over the staff's refusal to provide liquid bovine by-product? I think the most amazing part of this whole incident was that later in the afternoon while we were enjoying our dessert I actually saw this same woman bring a pitcher of milk to another table.
And now, back to the review ...
Jason also has a favorite tea: Jamaican Spice, which the tea menu describes as a zesty herbal infusion with red liquor and a bouquet of flavors, tartness of hibiscus and sweetness of cinnamon for a sweet, tangy, and spicy finish.
De ja vu ...
Only a manly-man drinks girly tea!
The first course, if you will, was a plate of tasty little tea sandwedges which included things like chickie salad, eggie salad, and watercress along with a greasy little onion tart.
Something else appears to be missing ...
After my tea pot rant I'm probably going to sound like a crank but I don't really care. In years past there was a sixth item on the plate: pate'. It was cold and disgusting to be sure, but I always traded mine to Jay for his egg salad and we were both school-yard happy. Since WDW has belatedly jumped on the "let's ban certain foods because it's trendy to so do" bandwagon, pate' has been eliminated from this course in the afternoon tea service. Isn't it interesting to note how the prices haven't been reduced and yet nothing has replaced the pate'?
Our second course in the tea service was the scone and jam tart with yummy Devonshire crème. The scone was warm and soft - the creme melted into it just like butter and it was ever-so-delectable with the preserves smeared over the top. My only real issue with this course was with the miserly portion of Devonshire crème ... there wasn't nearly enough in that little dish to smear on both the scone and the tart and who wants to ration a product with a 60% fat content while on vacation?
Any chance for seconds?
When it came time for dessert Jay and I chose both options; one of us selected strawberries and cream and the other chose a few pastries and all was right with the world. Up first: one bowl of strawberries and cream to be followed closely by one plate of tea pastries which included a chocolate éclair and a lychee nut mousse in a chocolate shell.
I really do wish we were eating this right now.
One out of two ain't bad I suppose
All we can say about the strawberries and cream can be summed up as follows: Can't talk, eating.
The berries were amazingly fresh and sweet with just a hint of tartness. As for the whipped cream ... it was the real deal, my friends; there was none of that "whipped topping" stuff that Grimace thinks is made from cream. She didn't believe Jay or me when we told her many years ago that there wasn't a trace of milk or cream in Cool Whip; when I rather sarcastically pointed out that the label actually reads "Non-Dairy Whipped Topping" she called me an over-achieving food snob.
Our other two choices were good and bad. The chocolate eclair was terrific, coated with rich, dark chocolate and filled with light custard. The lychee-nut mousse thing ... well, that was just not very good. I'm not even sure how to describe the taste. I took one bite, made a face, and went back to the strawberries and cream. Even Jay didn't think that it tasted very good although he manfully did his best to eat as much of it as possible. Our final verdict : some things are better left uneaten.
You'd think we'd be finished by now, wouldn't you? But no ... I still had to go and order myself a wee little birthday cake early in October before we left Stinktown. Is it so wrong to want something special for my two-days-before-my-birthday afternoon tea party?
The cake, vanilla with vanilla mousse filling and vanilla buttercream frosting, was as good as the last time we were lucky enough to have it. But the presentation left a little to be desired because there was no birthday message on the plate, no birthday candle to make a wish on, and no lovely pink rose as a parting gift. I must have really offended someone with that request for milk.
Cindy's Castle Cake
And here's the white chocolate castle once we were finished inhaling the cake:
Eat this too? Don't mind if we do!
And thus we finished our tea with about four hours remaining until we'd be eating appetizers and then more appetizers and then dinner and then more dessert ... liberally sprinkled with alcohol along the way ... at Todd English's Blue Zoo with BriarRosie and TheDISneyFamily.
Afternoon tea is a perennial favorite in both our books ... it's a lovely break from theme park madness in an elegant, quiet setting. Jay and I highly recommend paying the Gardenview Lounge a visit if you haven't already done so; even without the pate' they still plate up a great mid-afternoon meal!
Hmm, where would I have been at that time? I was either heading over to my resort on Magical Express, or I might have been already eating my burger at The Fountain in the Dolphin resort. Wow, I've been done with my review (for Todd English's bluezoo) months ago, so I'm looking forward to the Brenda Spin Treatment. 
This was a marked improvement.
Bendy, you make me wanna drink around the world! 
Looks like you two had fun walking around WS that day! 
I'm beyond bummed. BUT, my darling daughter, Jordan will be there working. She got accepted into the Disney College Program! 
We had to cancel Oct. so we could move her down to WDW in August and move her back in early Jan. So, we will miss you guys this year. 
Jordan is looking forward to meeting you & Jay, so I hope you'll stop by and say, 'Hi!' to her during your trip. 
