Was I wrong to respond to rudeness with more rudeness?

[shoney]

"I stepped to the counter in front of him and instinctively didn't say anything, waiting for the customary "Can I help you?" "

I would not have done that. I would have walked up to the counter and placed my order. I wouldn't have waited for a greeting. Now, I do think the hand gesture was a rude response, but I also think just standing there and not placing your order was a bit obnoxious.

 

[okeydokey]

I think your reply was very rude and you came off looking like the jerk. If my husband did that when I was with him I would have been very embarrassed.

 

[plutotek]

More power to you. I would have done something similar. Very few things annoy me like rude customer service.

 

[gemini2727]

I don't think the OP was rude at all. He stated how he felt he should be treated as a customer. The kid was out of line in the first place.

 

[gemini2727]

"I stepped to the counter in front of him and instinctively didn't say anything, waiting for the customary "Can I help you?" "

I would not have done that. I would have walked up to the counter and placed my order. I wouldn't have waited for a greeting. Now, I do think the hand gesture was a rude response, but I also think just standing there and not placing your order was a bit obnoxious.

When I approach a counter, I don't assume the worker is ready to take care of me. I'll wait until they say something along the lines of "May I help you?" or some kind of greeting, even just a smile would be fine. If they gestured at me instead, I would consider that very rude.

 

[topolino]

When I approach a counter, I don't assume the worker is ready to take care of me. I'll wait until they say something along the lines of "May I help you?" or some kind of greeting, even just a smile would be fine. If they gestured at me instead, I would consider that very rude.

That is exactly why I didn't say anything; I gave him a moment to finish up his previous transaction. After 2 seconds or so of silence, he made the "spit it out" gesture.

 

[Andrea1973]

I totally get the situation. Although maybe a bit too much (but really I was not there to judge the exact look the kid was giving you) I do think that you had a right to point out that the kid is in customer service, and should act appropriately. There is a very fine line in situations like this...do you say something or not. (I can be hot tempered at times, so I could see how this could happen)

AND with a great many tales of how kids perform in jobs these days (insert Pete's rant about the CM's at MK) sometimes it is necessary to remind them without customers like yourself, their place of employment will not need their services any longer.

Long story short...SOME kids need that reminder, some don't (that is where the fine line comes in)
so tough call, I might have just passed it by and just taken my time deciding what I wanted instead...but again I was not there to see the look/gesture he gave you.

 

[runwad]

I don't think you were rude either OP, I'd of done something very similar.

I too agree social skills and manners are going right down the crapper now a days.

 

[DisneyJules]

As someone who can take things personally (I'm working on it) I think you took this too personally. Yes, it sounds like this young kid could definitely use some training on customer service but in the big scheme of things, this is peanuts. I'm reading a great book called From Stress to Stillness by Gina Lake, it's all about dropping your ego. So in a situation such as this, you would recognize that he wasn't being overly polite but would leave it at that rather than internalizing the situation.

 

[Planogirl]

You should have set up a poll. Both sides here have good points imo.

 

[Kellykins1218]

I think you were the one who was rude.

 

[mnrose]

I thought about this thread as I waited in line at my Costco to get a frozen yogurt yesterday. Line had 3 or 4 people ahead of me. When I got to the counter, the woman behind the cash register simply looked up and said "hi." I said "Hi, I'll have a vanilla frozen yogurt."

She never said "how can I help you?" I guess I should have been offended?

 

[topolino]

I thought about this thread as I waited in line at my Costco to get a frozen yogurt yesterday. Line had 3 or 4 people ahead of me. When I got to the counter, the woman behind the cash register simply looked up and said "hi." I said "Hi, I'll have a vanilla frozen yogurt."

She never said "how can I help you?" I guess I should have been offended?

I guess you didn't read the whole thread?

It was the hand spinning motion meaning "start talking pal, I don't have all day" that set me off, not the lack of a greeting.

 

[mnrose]

Yes, but the reason that he did the hand spinning gesture was because you DELIBERATELY stood there mute. You said that too. That's what *I* was responding to. If I'm waiting in a line to order, my first words when it's my turn and I've made eye contact is "I will have....." Not silence. In the ideal world, they would say "how can I help you" but honestly, it's not necessary in that situation. He is, of course, waiting to help you! You need to tell him how.

 

[topolino]

Yes, but the reason that he did the hand spinning gesture was because you DELIBERATELY stood there mute. You said that too. That's what *I* was responding to. If I'm waiting in a line to order, my first words when it's my turn and I've made eye contact is "I will have....." Not silence. In the ideal world, they would say "how can I help you" but honestly, it's not necessary in that situation. He is, of course, waiting to help you! You need to tell him how.

I understand your point, I really do, but were I the clerk in the situation, in order to break the silence, I would've verbalized a greeting rather than gesticulate to the customer with my hand.

 

[Lisaren]

This thread is so funny. Many people today rant about the lack of customer service and/or the decline in politeness in service transactions. Some of the same ones complaining say it is their first job and they don't make a lot of money so it is ok to accept bad customer service. My first job was at minimum wage and customer service. My boss did not accept the excuse that you don't make a lot of money so you can be rude or slow or forget to smile. I have been cussed, I have been threatened, I have been propositioned all while working a minimum wage job - guess what I was trained to suck it up and respond with a smile. Sometimes I fail, but the training has stuck with me and been an important part of every job (not just customer service) I have had since I was 16 years old.
A first job is not supposed to pay much money, it is a time for you to learn skills to use later in life. Don't think it is a skill to get yelled at by one customer and treat the next nicely, think again. Don't think it is a skill to put your cat to sleep this morning, go to work and smile at customers all day, think again. Don't think it is a skill to lose sleep with an infant at home and still be expected to do payroll for 500 employees, think again. Anyone who works knows suck it up buttercup happens more often than not and the earlier you learn that the better your work experience is. Maybe the op helped that person learn this sooner rather than later and just maybe he will treat the next customer better because of it.

 

[TAX GUY]

I must be the only one that has started to place an order only to find out the clerk was still finishing (be it wrapping up products, cleaning up after the previous order, etc). That's typically why I wait for some sort of greeting (either "hi", "can I help you", "what would you like", etc). If I was to see someone just walk up to the counter and start barking out orders, I would think THAT was rude.

 

[ronandannette]

Yesterday as I was paying a toll on the NJ Turnpike into NYC (I had forgotten my EZpass in another car) I pulled up to the lane and the cashier never greeted me. I handed her my ticket and money and she handed me back change. Not a word was said between us. It was weird but I was waiting for her to at least say Hello or Thank you - not a single word. I think you were right, perhaps a tad bit harsh but a Hello and Thank you are the absolute basics and they need to say that each and every transaction.

You've just hit on my #1 peeve in customer/cashier interactions - not thanking the customer. Maybe 1 out of 10 cashiers actually do this - what are these people being taught? And while I instinctively thank them at the end of a transaction, for the love of God would somebody please start instructing employees that the proper response to a "thank you" is "you're welcome"? "Sure" or "no problem" just irks the h#%l out of me.

 

[BSmithington]

Let me rewrite your post and you can judge if you went overboard...

The other night I went to the movie theater in some random town. I purchased a ticket to see a movie about a giant earthquake starring a guy named "The Rock." I went to buy popcorn and the teenager behind the counter didn't greet me with a "good evening."

OP, this wasn't a symphony it was The Rock in an earthquake movie. Get your popcorn and soda and move on.

 

[Buzz-Light-Beer]

It may have been a little rude only because you said it in a sarcastic tone. Other than that I think what you said had to be said to this guy who was giving you customer service. I also think the guy appreciated you saying it as he apologized and corrected himself.