I didn't plan to respond to this any more, but what tasha99 pointed out was one of the problems.
When I met with her alone, we talked about work, she complained about her manager and even discussed leaving, I have always been her voice of reason as there is no guarantee on what type of environment she will be in (we discussed quite a bit at the time when we worked together) and in this economy, any new job can end soon, hence I always discourage her from leaving a job. The more I discussed / debated with her, the more I knew about her environment, and for this particular incidence, I have to agree with her that she should be looking for another job.
For people who said that when an employer hired someone they expected the person to be on the job, but when an employer hired someone and gave the employee sick time and vacation time, the employer should not expect the person to be on the job during the sick time and vacation time. (it is just like someone questioning whether a surgery is a medical necessity).
In this particular incidence, she told everyone including her manager and manager's manger that she would be using a sick day for doctor's visit for that Friday, she then reminded her manager again throughout the week, only to see her manager sent out a mail before 9:00 am copying to the management. (I suspected the manager was a whiner, and based on what she told me in the past, I suspected there was a rivalry going on, but it is besides the point here). Then they had a meeting only to find out the manager trying to pin on her that it was her problem when the other guy did not find someone to cover for Friday, after my friend showed her manager the mail, they began telling her that sick days were not for doctor's appointment. On the other hand, they knew it at least 2 weeks ahead. Yes, I don't think it is treating employees with respect and I am surprised that apparently it is acceptable in many of the work environments.
She could have not giving them a heads-up, scheduled her appointments and called in sick.
Anyway, as far as I knew, before the recent incidence, she went in late, with approval, on the average of around (or fewer) than once a month and as someone also pointed out it was not really excessive. She is now planning to group her appointments and using her vacation days, the reason for my post was to find out what she legally can use for those appointments. I had already suggested her to talk to HR.
I have no interest to discuss what the norm should be as it really depends on the manager or industry and it was not my question....I have to agree with her that it is not the right environment for her.