UPDATE PG 2**My kindergartener wet his pants at school today..

[Mermaid02]

.... He did it last period in gym. He said they aren't allowed to ask to go to the bathroom in gym and if they do then they can go but have to sit in time out when they come back. I called the school and spoke to the gym teacher who said all the right things but for crying out loud- when a 5 year old says they have to go- they usually mean NOW! You shouldn't be punished for having to go to the bathroom!

 

[JohnTBap]

Poor little fella. Our PE teachers are not sympathetic to those types of things, either.

 

[Ricola]

I would be on the phone to the principal.

 

[Mermaid02]

Oh believe me I talked to the principal FIRST! Then the gym teacher..... They are supposed to take bathroom breaks before gym, but when you are 5 sometimes you don't always KNOW you have to go. He told me he think "running" makes him have to pee.

That's twice in the last week I've called his school- I bet his file has a big sticker on it that says, "Beware of Mother"

 

[Kteacher]

putting kids in time out for needing to use the bathroom is the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard!!! When 5 and 6 year olds say they need to go, they usually mean they need to go right at that second. Keep complaining to the teacher and principal!!

 

[Mermaid02]

Thanks Kteacher- coming from a professional I feel empowered! Nobody knew he did it because his sweatpants were so thick they soaked most of it up- at least he was spared any embarassment.

 

[Tinkbell]

Originally posted by Kteacher
When 5 and 6 year olds say they need to go, they usually mean they need to go right at that second

I have to agree there. Most of them don't ask until it is an emergency. Last week, a boy wet his pants WHILE he was asking me if he could go. This happened during a story and he said he didn't want to miss the ending. Poor thing.

Having to take a time out for needing to go to the bathroom, especially at that age when there is little control, is ridiculous.

 

[The Mystery Machine]

Well mermaid that is absolute crapola. I would be furious. Sit in time out because a K has to go to the bathroom...grrr...grrr..grrr...what is this world coming to?

Poor little guy.

 

[Wishing on a star]

I agree, anything other than immediate assistance with a smile when a little one says they need to go is just ridiculous!!!

When I was picking up my son from Pre-kindergarden the other day, a boy was 'dancin' around telling the teacher that he needed to go... She hated to leave the room to take him, she was saying, "but we had a bathroom break right before nap...."

SOOOO!!!! that was before nap. And, I would bet good money that nobody insured that ALL of the kids actually went, or offered any assistance. I was right there, making a point to actively watch to see her reaction... so she asked if I could keep an eye on the few remaining nappers while she ran him to the bathroom... Poor kid didn't make it. They came back in a couple minutes later, and he was soaked. He apparantly had a hard time getting his pants undone fast enough. (Needed to be in elasticized pull-on pants!!)

Most kids are indeed naturally going to be too embarrassed to interrupt nap-time, story-time, etc... If a kid is in bad shape enough to speak up, then that usually means they GOTTA go!

Plus, there are big physical considerations, especially with pooping... My son had major problems when he was in Mothers Day Out because he was 'holding-it'. He ended up with the all too common toddler bowel problems, resulting in a trip to a specialist!

Teachers definately need to be really proactive when it comes to this! And, encourage and assist, not add restrictions, embarrasment, time-out, etc.!!!!

Maybe you could print off some of these messages and take copies to the principal and the teachers.

 

[Jeafl]

Poor little guy....

Last year I helped out in my daughter's kindergarten class every week. Bathroom accidents were fairly common, but they were handled really well I thought. The teacher had me walk behind the child to the nurse's office so no one could see the problem. The nurse matter-of-factly handed the child a brand new pair of underpants (they keep a whole bin of new ones), and a pair of sweatpants. The child changes and the nurse puts the soiled clothes in a bag to go home. No big deal, and usually the other kids never knew it happened. The child was allowed to keep the underpants, but the parents had to wash and return the sweatpants. I was really impressed at how they handled it.

 

[cruisnfamily]

The kids are not permitted to go to the bathroom during "specials"(PE, art, music, computer & media) or during lunch. They are supposed to take care of this during regular class time or else just wait. Well my guy can't "just wait". Last year he told them in the cafeteria at lunch he had to go and it was an emergency and they said no and he ended up peeing all over the lunchroom floor. Our school nurse has changes of clothes too and I was chatting with her a few days later (when I returned the clothes) and she was saying that she really strongly disagrees with them not letting the kids use the restroom when they need to. My son is in 1st grade this year and he is still guilty of waiting too long....when he says he has to go, he means RIGHT NOW, not after this class is over. I don't know what the solution is to this, it's only actually resulted in accident for my son one time but if it became an issue regularly I would need to battle the school as this is a school wide policy.

 

[Dan Murphy]

That almost borders on cruel in my book. Poor kid. Little kids don't have bladder/bowel control of an adult, nor the foresight. I presume they are trying to teach those concepts, but still, a time out? Not right, JMO.

 

[Michelle]

That is absolutely ridiculous and you have every right to be angry!

At my daughter's school there is a bathroom JUST for the kindergarteners and right in their room. The kids can ALWAYS use it, whenever they need. NO child should have to suffer the humiliation of an accident. Five-year-olds do not use going to the bathroom as a ploy to avoid work as some older kids might, they just have to GO.

Good luck with the school, mermaid, they need to be brought into the 21st century with their thinking!

 

[aahmom1]

Poor baby The gym teacher REALLY needs to re-think that policy. A 5 year old is just a little munchkin, they don't always know when they'll have to go.

 

[SeaSpray]

We had a 6th grade teacher who used to tell the kids that they can NEVER leave to use the restroom while in his (science) class, and that they shouldn't even ask, because the answer will always be "no".

When I heard that one of DSs friends almost wet his pants in class (and this is a 6th grader!), I flipped. (I didn't know about this teacher's "rule" before this incident or I would've called sooner than I did). I told the principal, the teacher, and I wrote it all down and copied it to the superintendent, that my sons will NOT be told they cannot leave a classroom to go to the bathroom (or to the nurse, if necessary). I told all these people that I have instructed my sons to simply leave the room, go to the bathroom, then directly to the office because I want to be called, if they ever have to go to the bathroom and are not allowed to. (Of course they should ask first). Who do some of these teachers think they are?!?! Of course this teacher tried to make excuses, saying that "yes, of course I'd really let them go if they had to go"... So then WHY tell these kids that will NOT be allowed to go? My DSs, as well as most of their friends, are good kids who aren't streetwise and actually believe all the B.S. that teachers tell them.

Mermaid, I am so sorry this happened to your DS.

Abuse of authority really makes me angry

 

[goofygirl]

What kind of school is this ? (catholic school?)

When I was in Kindergarten (granted it was almost 30 yrs ago) I didnt even have gym class. Gym didnt start til 1st grade! We stayed in one classroom the whole day, and bathrooms were right attached to the classroom, and we went at our own free will. I just assumed all schools were that way. maybe I went to really "strange" school?

 

[Talking Hands]

SeaSpray I can see why a 5th grade teacher would tell a class that they can't use the bathroom except during specified times. Fifth graders have a habit of taking advantage of the situation if the teachers are too free with the bathroom passes. Been there. That said there is a certain wiggle that they get where you know that they are not kidding. It is pretty easy to tell when a kid is faking and when there is a real need.
Kindergardeners are another story. When they say they have to go it means now! Our kindergarden and first grade classrooms all have their own bathroom as well as all the SPED classes except deaf and LD. I can pretty well judge with the deaf kids when the need is there. The sign become more frantic. We send them in pairs or if we need to send one alone the para will take him. When our first grade deaf child says she needs to go we do take her immediately. Who ever is available goes then. Btw it is not unusual for a kindergarden or first grader to have an accident so our teachers suggest a change of undies and pants be kept in their bookbag along with a ziploc to return wet clothes. Plus our counselor keeps a stash of underwear in all sizes in her office for accidents.

 

[Saffron]

That is so absurd!

 

[SeaSpray]

Originally posted by Talking Hands
SeaSpray I can see why a 5th grade teacher would tell a class that they can't use the bathroom except during specified times. Fifth graders have a habit of taking advantage of the situation if the teachers are too free with the bathroom passes. Been there. That said there is a certain wiggle that they get where you know that they are not kidding. It is pretty easy to tell when a kid is faking and when there is a real need.
Kindergardeners are another story. When they say they have to go it means now! Our kindergarden and first grade classrooms all have their own bathroom as well as all the SPED classes except deaf and LD. I can pretty well judge with the deaf kids when the need is there. The sign become more frantic. We send them in pairs or if we need to send one alone the para will take him. When our first grade deaf child says she needs to go we do take her immediately. Who ever is available goes then. Btw it is not unusual for a kindergarden or first grader to have an accident so our teachers suggest a change of undies and pants be kept in their bookbag along with a ziploc to return wet clothes. Plus our counselor keeps a stash of underwear in all sizes in her office for accidents.

Talking Hands: I agree. There is a big difference between kids in those 2 grades, and the teachers in charge of the younger kids absolutely need to be more lenient and understand that those younger kids can't hold it in very long!

And I do realize there will be certain kids who abuse bathroom privileges and use it just to get out of class. But a teacher who tells all kids that they can NEVER leave his classroom? NO TEACHER is going to tell that to my sons and have it enforced. This particular boy who almost wet his pants in science class is a quiet kid who never asks to leave the classroom. I know him personally, he's DS14's friend, and that is why I flipped when I heard what happened, and let the school know that as for MY kids, that rule is totally unacceptable.

This teacher has since stopped telling his students that they cannot leave his room

 

[disneyjunkie]

How far is the bathroom from the gym? Is the gym teacher alone with the kids?

I think it sounds harsh to tell 5 year old they can't go to the bathroom when the need arises. However if the teacher is alone and the bathroom is not in a place where she can keep an eye on both places, she has a problem.

If she sends the child to the bathroom alone and he/she gets hurt, the teacher may be blamed. She can't stop gym class and have everyone walk to the bathroom together, and she can't leave the other students to escort one to the bathroom.

Are there TAs at your son's school? If so, maybe they could go to gym(and the other specials) with the students. This way the gym teacher will have an extra set of eyes and hands to help out.


I hope this doesn't happen to your son again.