Ugh, I need some Disney Magic...

[Twoboysnmygirl]

or a hug.

I'm so down right now. My dd and I went to WDW last year with a friend, but the rest of our family (my DH, two teenage boys, and IL's) have not been. When we got back and told them how wonderful it was, we decided on a family trip.

I've made all the shirts, journals, passports, my IL's have paid for the house, the tickets, MNSSHP...everything is set...

and my husbands truck breaks. Not JUST a truck, his TRUCK. He's an owner operator/truck driver and he's stranded in CA with a 3500$ bill and we don't have it. My FIL is going to see if he can put it on his credit card and we will be able to pay him back in about 2-3 months, but the trip is just 33 days away and DH says he's sorry but he can't go owing his dad that much, he can't take ANY days off.

My heart is broken, I can't even come to the DIS to escape, which is what I usually do. Last year, our 2nd attempt at a family trip to the beach was thwarted by IKE and the house we were going to rent was washed away. This was going to be our first full family vacation and I wish I could talk him into it (EVERYTHING IS PAID!) but he doesn't want to take off at all. We see him once a month if we are lucky and I was so looking forward to 10 days with him.

Gah, I'm just feeling sorry for myself, but most people will think I'm being silly and I thought maybe those of you that understand the magic of Disney would get why I'm so sad about it. It just won't be the same without him and strange going with his parents and the kids while he works (the man deserves a break more than ANY of us) Sigh.

 

[churchpilot]

I'm heartbroken for you. I know how magical Disney World is and what an escape it is for the whole family. We are going to Disney in November without my husband because his schedule is too hectic, and while I am looking forward to Disney, I will miss my hubby. Wishing you Pixie Magic and a change in circumstances.

 

[Twoboysnmygirl]

Thanks churchpilot.

I keep thinking that I should be used to this, it's not like I don't do things on my own or I'm one of those women who can't do anything without her husband. It's just that Disney was going to be different, we were all going to be together and he was going to see and feel the magic that I felt there. It's the only place I've ever been that I feel like I'm FREE and I can be a kid again, no worries. I wanted him to experience that so badly. Ugh, now I'm gonna cry...

 

[AngelBabyJana]

Oh no, I'm sorry that your going through this. Maybe since the Disney trip is with your inlaws .... perhaps his dad will encourage him to go, knowing that everything is already paid for. I understand why he feels like he needs to pay his dad back asap, but it is sad that he will have to miss your first family vacation in awhile. I just wanted to say that I really hope that he changes his mind and takes a week off with the family.

We leave in 18 days, and have had all kind of unexpected expenses come up, including car trouble with both our cars (things always happen at the wrong time). Thankfully we are still going (everything is paid for!), but we've had to spend most of our savings .... so although different situations, I know how you feel. (((hugs)))

 

[Pumbaa_]

I have to say I would cancel the trip and use the money to help pay off the truck repair bill. Then start planning a new trip

Life happens and I am very sorry about the TRUCK breaking down. So hard when life happens.

Hope things look up soon and I understand

 

[Twoboysnmygirl]

Oh I would cancel the trip, but it's not my money! MIL has paid for EVERYTHING aside from the things I have made the the motels I have paid for on our way down and back. So canceling won't really help pay the truck off, but I doubt I will enjoy if he's working while we play. If it were a different situation and he wanted to stay home or it was a girls trip, I would be fine, but not if he's out there working his tail off while we enjoy Disney.

What's most important is that the truck is getting fixed and he can continue to work. We are very lucky to have such supportive family and they will be top priority before anything in getting them paid back.

There may be hope yet, if he gets a large check or two, we could pay his dad off quickly and he'll still agree to go. OR MIL might put her foot down and make him!

Prayers and magically thoughts would be appreciated!!

 

[pixidustmom]

That does suck. I hate when things go bad before something you have looked forward to for so long. What if he could swing a few days off at least. Like half the time you had planned. At least he gets to have some family time and enjoy the trip too.

 

[ireland_nicole]

oh, I'm so sorry; we had to cancel our trip this year, but at least I have next year to look forward to- I hope. I really hope you're able to get things worked out.

 

[bankgirl05]

or a hug.

I'm so down right now. My dd and I went to WDW last year with a friend, but the rest of our family (my DH, two teenage boys, and IL's) have not been. When we got back and told them how wonderful it was, we decided on a family trip.

I've made all the shirts, journals, passports, my IL's have paid for the house, the tickets, MNSSHP...everything is set...

and my husbands truck breaks. Not JUST a truck, his TRUCK. He's an owner operator/truck driver and he's stranded in CA with a 3500$ bill and we don't have it. My FIL is going to see if he can put it on his credit card and we will be able to pay him back in about 2-3 months, but the trip is just 33 days away and DH says he's sorry but he can't go owing his dad that much, he can't take ANY days off.

My heart is broken, I can't even come to the DIS to escape, which is what I usually do. Last year, our 2nd attempt at a family trip to the beach was thwarted by IKE and the house we were going to rent was washed away. This was going to be our first full family vacation and I wish I could talk him into it (EVERYTHING IS PAID!) but he doesn't want to take off at all. We see him once a month if we are lucky and I was so looking forward to 10 days with him.

Gah, I'm just feeling sorry for myself, but most people will think I'm being silly and I thought maybe those of you that understand the magic of Disney would get why I'm so sad about it. It just won't be the same without him and strange going with his parents and the kids while he works (the man deserves a break more than ANY of us) Sigh.

I am thinking that maybe the IL's can give him a gentle push too... I do understand that maybe the weight of owing money can be pretty heavy, but all work and no play does not contribute to a happy or healthy home life, DH deserves this vacation as much as the rest of you, even now, or maybe ESPECIALLY now. You already said that your kids are teens, it's not gonna be much longer til they're out on thier own, doing thier own thing, they could benefit from some dad time too...

Prayers to you, I know that everything happens for a reason, even if it is not immediately evident what that reason is...

 

[peekinglemer]

My dh is also a truck driver and very funny about owing anyone ANYTHING. He doesn't even like to borrow a cup of sugar from the neighbors. So I can understand your situation. That being said...if you do not have trip insurance and can not cancel your dh is actually wasting money by not going. Plus...the bills and the problems and work will still be there when you get back. Children are only children for a short time. Plus, who knows where life will take us. If we keep putting things off waiting for the "right" time we may turn around one day and find it is too late.

Yes, this may take your dh out of his comfort zone by going on a vacation when he is in debt to his dad but if it is really important to you maybe he can look past that this one time. And maybe the two of you can work out a plan to help him pay things back faster once you get back.

Good luck. Sending hugs and pixie dust.

 

[Twoboysnmygirl]

He doesn't even like to borrow a cup of sugar from the neighbors.

Yep, that describes mine too.

My MIL is discussing rescheduling, but I hope she will nudge instead, I told her we wouldn't be able to get the military tickets after Dec. 23rd. After dh talked to his mom, he has told me he just needs time to think. That's fine as long as he doesn't need more than 32 days!

Did I mention our first day in MK is my dd's 9th birthday?!?!? How about all the 2009 shirts I made and MNSSHP tickets we already have. Ugh. I'm going to eat bread and pb for a month to pinch pennies and get his father paid. It's unfortunate, but I think his father actually doesn't want to go on the trip (doesn't like crowds) and isn't going to nudge dh to go at all b/c I think he would prefer the trip canceled.

 

[bumbershoot]

OR MIL might put her foot down and make him!

Well, yes, that is what should happen!

It's his parents paying and going, right? And his parents loaning him the money to fix the truck? Do they KNOW that their loan is going to cause him to stay home???? Are they OK with this?

Did I mention our first day in MK is my dd's 9th birthday?!?!? How about all the 2009 shirts I made and MNSSHP tickets we already have. Ugh. I'm going to eat bread and pb for a month to pinch pennies and get his father paid. It's unfortunate, but I think his father actually doesn't want to go on the trip (doesn't like crowds) and isn't going to nudge dh to go at all b/c I think he would prefer the trip canceled.

Oh, I see (the last sentence).

Sounds like DH and dad are a little too much alike! You and MIL gotta band together and make the menfolk go.

Sounds like you really would lose a bunch of money if you don't go...


It's amazing how much money people can scrape together when it's necessary! Go for it!!!!

 

[mickimousemama]

As the daughter of an owner/operater my heart goes out to you. I assume he books his own loads, Two years ago while my oldest bro and his wife were at WDW my parents found a load very near Orlando and were able to visit with them for two days, they could bring the truck right into Disney parkinglots and they slept right in their semi. (They live in their truck all year long) I know its not the same as having him there the whole time but if he is fortunate enough to even spend a few days of the magic that would be nice for all of you. My parents plan on making another run down that way next month while my Brother and his family are there again (So if you see a big purple semi there...)

Anyhow, best of luck to all of you, hopefully MIL can talk him into going since she's already paid and if he doesn't go she will have waisted all the money paid for his part of the trip...

 

[Brancaneve]

Bummer.... I would suggest having a family Disney night soon or on the day in which you were scheduled to leave. Wear your Dis. clothes, watch a movie and have some yummy snacks. Visit a Disney store and purchase something inexpensive(mugs) for your special evening. Then start planning for your trip when things calm down!

 

[AnastasiaTremaine]

This is so much about perspective.
Years down the road, when the kids are graduating from high school and off to start their own lives, do you think your husband will look back fondly upon the memories of quickly clearing a debt...or will he be able to to recall the happy memories of a very special vacation spent with his children and his wife?

If the trip is paid for and if you are lucky enough to have someone temporarily cover this expense for you guys, I think you need to talk to your husband and explain to him how much this means to you and what a very special experience this is for your family - and how very important he is to the family element. That you SO appreciate all his hard work, but like someone said earlier, 'all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy' - and sorta kills his soul? If this is a family loan, I am sure your father in law would understand taking a little while longer than originally planned to repay the loan (and heck, it's worth it to add on interest!). I am glad he is taking it into consideration, but I really do believe that you've got so many good points on your side...pride hardly outweighs a fully paid family vacation with the ones you love!

Good luck to you, and I hope we get an update in the next day or two that you guys are still on!

 

[Twoboysnmygirl]

Thank you so much everyone for your responses! It's so nice to know there are other people out there that get it.

mickimousmama-it IS a possibility that he could get a load to Orlando or going through, this will be my last ditch effort to get him there if all else fails. In his mind this would work better b/c he wouldn't miss as much work with driving (it's a 17 hour drive for us from Missouri) and this may be what we do.

I so hope he decides to go, I think a lot will depend on if we can pay his dad a chunk of the money before the trip.

I've said all these things to him, but he's so driven to "provide" for his family b/c he didn't grow up with a lot monetarily that he forgets that we need more than financial support from him. We need to BE with him. My youngest is turning 9 and my boys are 14 & 15...the years are slipping by! I feel like I get lots of quality time with the kids, we homeschool, but he has missed so much and he knows it but still keeps working himself into the ground.

We've spent years just getting by and struggling and this trip means more to me than just a family vacation. I don't know, maybe I shouldn't have put so much into it but it was almost the only way to get him away from work for 10 days! I should stop rambling about it now, he would die if he knew I was dumping all this at the DIS. (yes, he knows who you are!)

 

[dfchelbay]

I agree with the PP...perhaps the inlaws can give him a gentle push toward going to WDW. Also, maybe in between truck runs, he can park his Rig, jump on a plane and spend 2-3 days with the rest of the family instead of all 10 days. Then, he'll get family and WDW time, and get a good chunk of work in too. Good luck

 

[Mommy2JulietJocelyn]

I am thinking that maybe the IL's can give him a gentle push too... I do understand that maybe the weight of owing money can be pretty heavy, but all work and no play does not contribute to a happy or healthy home life, DH deserves this vacation as much as the rest of you, even now, or maybe ESPECIALLY now. You already said that your kids are teens, it's not gonna be much longer til they're out on thier own, doing thier own thing, they could benefit from some dad time too...

Prayers to you, I know that everything happens for a reason, even if it is not immediately evident what that reason is...

I totally agree with this - the teens need some Dad time before it's too late. The trip is paid already, If IL's talk to him about going maybe he'll go. I also HATE owing ANYBODY money. But stress is a nasty thing on a body and "all work & no Play" is not a good motto for life.

Hugs to you & your family - it will get better.

 

[simba20]

Is there any way your husband could reach a compromise. Like have him work for a number of days and then maybe come down to Disney for three days or so, at least.....

In 1995 my father and I were watching The Christmas Parade at WDW on TV, I casually mentioned how I would just once like to go to Disney and stay on the property (we were always an off property family when we went). The last time I had been to Disney World was in 1990. My dad started researching it, and by March he had booked a trip for all of us (including my boyfriend -- now husband) at the Villas at the Disney Institue for September of '96.

So here comes the trip and a few days before my father gets sick. He wasn't feeling well, but knew he needed to stay close to home (he was on dialysis). Our trip also included visitng my grandfather and grandmother in St. Petersburg at the end of the week. At first we were panicked, deciding not to go, but he insisted that we go, and he would do his best to meet us in St. Pete at the end of the week.

Well, he surprised us. The last day of our stay at WDW he showed up. Turns out he made arrangements at a dialysis clinic in St. Pete that he would use when we visited my grandfather and he flew down a day early so he could have his scheduled treatment and join us at WDW.

My father passed away a year later in 1997 due to his kidney failure. A friend of his who he would have breakfast with in the mornings told me that my Dad always talked about giving me that Disney trip and how surprised I was (well we all were) to have him down with us.

Anyway, point being, maybe he could find a few days........

 

[allison443]

or a hug.

I'm so down right now. My dd and I went to WDW last year with a friend, but the rest of our family (my DH, two teenage boys, and IL's) have not been. When we got back and told them how wonderful it was, we decided on a family trip.

I've made all the shirts, journals, passports, my IL's have paid for the house, the tickets, MNSSHP...everything is set...

and my husbands truck breaks. Not JUST a truck, his TRUCK. He's an owner operator/truck driver and he's stranded in CA with a 3500$ bill and we don't have it. My FIL is going to see if he can put it on his credit card and we will be able to pay him back in about 2-3 months, but the trip is just 33 days away and DH says he's sorry but he can't go owing his dad that much, he can't take ANY days off.

My heart is broken, I can't even come to the DIS to escape, which is what I usually do. Last year, our 2nd attempt at a family trip to the beach was thwarted by IKE and the house we were going to rent was washed away. This was going to be our first full family vacation and I wish I could talk him into it (EVERYTHING IS PAID!) but he doesn't want to take off at all. We see him once a month if we are lucky and I was so looking forward to 10 days with him.

Gah, I'm just feeling sorry for myself, but most people will think I'm being silly and I thought maybe those of you that understand the magic of Disney would get why I'm so sad about it. It just won't be the same without him and strange going with his parents and the kids while he works (the man deserves a break more than ANY of us) Sigh.

I'm sorry this happened, and I can understand why you are so upset. But is there any way the trip can be rescheduled? You are making it sound like the only options are go with him, or without him. Since the point of the whole trip is to have the whole family together, which you have never had before, including his own parents, why is going without him even an option?

On the other hand, I cannot fault your husband for his decision. Your kids are teens, and he is modeling a very responsible husband/father role for them. I don't know his relationship with his parents, but does he have any ambivalence about them paying for his family's vacation, and then lending him money for essential truck repairs for his business? There could be some complexities in there: feelings of pride, etc. Maybe he couldn't enjoy being in wdw on his parents' dime while still owing them money, when he could be out earning the repayment money at the same time, kwim? Would he be able to relax and enjoy the family time?

I hope you guys were able to work out the truck issue-was it definite that your fil could put it on his credit card? Unfortunately getting that paid now would have to take priority over disney-that is your family's means of support!

I truly hope it works out for you. I could tell from your post how you were looking forward to being together as a family and enjoying time together.