trying to have a baby

[SaraJayne]

My husband and I want to try to have another baby. There are several concerns, we have one child whom is almost 10. Is this going to be a good thing or a bad thing with the age difference? The other issue is our first child is an invitro baby so we may not be able to do this anyway but want to try. I am excited but nervous at the same time. By the way I am 37 so age is not really on my side either.

My DH is the youngest in his family by 7 years (14 years between him and his eldest sibling).

When we discussed having a third child a couple years ago, he was against it because he was not going to have a kid grow up like he did, being the youngest by so much.

But each family is different.

 

[TaraLee4]

My husband and I want to try to have another baby. There are several concerns, we have one child whom is almost 10. Is this going to be a good thing or a bad thing with the age difference? The other issue is our first child is an invitro baby so we may not be able to do this anyway but want to try. I am excited but nervous at the same time. By the way I am 37 so age is not really on my side either.

My sister is 13, my step sister is 11 and my step brother is 10. They're so much FUN!

Okay, so I may not get to share clothes with my sisters, but i've never fought with them either. I asked and asked for a little brother or sister, and I was 10 before it happened...My sisters and brother are great to be around. I still get to play with the kid toys, and I'm old enough to take them for a night so that my parents can have some time for themselves.

I've heard that it's "like, the COOLEST thing" to have a big sister who can drive you to the mall without your mom.

My mom does say that it's a bit like having two only children at home...I left home at 18, so it's just been her and my sister for years..

Good luck with everything!!!

 

[RUDisney]

My youngest sister is 24 years younger than me. She was my parents 25th anniversary surprise. There are 15 years between my formerly youngest sister and my youngest sister.

My youngest sister is 19 now. When she moved into her dorm last September, I came along with my kids to help her cart her stuff and move in. Everyone thought she was my DD and that my Mom was her DGM.

I am closer to her than I am to any of my other siblings, although we are all a pretty tight bunch anyway. She says that I'm like her mother but I don't judge or punish her.

There are 4 years between she and my DS and 5 years between she and my DD. She and my DS are like best friends and he only calls her Aunt when he wants to tease her.

I think the only thing that you need to be concerned about is how jealous your first child will be. While kids get over their new sibling jealousy pretty quick, it will be there, so be prepared to plan special things that you and your older child can do together to lessen that strain.

BTW, my Mom was 46 when she had my youngest DSis.

Best of luck to you and enjoy trying!

 

[webprinter]

My kids are 7 1/2 years apart. It was fine but they were never close until the youngest was about 16. Then, they were close for a few years and my daughter finally had a much wanted sister, (our daughter in law) but after that DS and DDIL moved to Gillette, Wy. One thing I noticed is that the younger one was much more competitive, trying to keep up with her older brother who could do no wrong. He, on the other hand, has always been protective, much to her dismay as an older teenager and young adult who doesn't want her older brother telling her who to date. One thing that was nice is that he was already doing his own thing which left more time for her with us. Another nice thing was a teenager with a driver's license who could drive his little sister to her activities if we were not home from work yet. We also had a built in babysitter after a few years. There are advantages and disadvantages but I wouldn't let a 10 year difference stop you from another child. Another advanatage is that we could send the two of them off to do their own thing at WDW without worrying about them. It made them feel more like they didn't have to "drag us around".

 

[emer95]

I believe that the best gift you can give your child is a sibling. Yes, go for it!! I have two kids, 9 and 11, and I would love a third child. I had trouble getting pregnant and I was much younger then, so it probably won't happen. I have two brothers who are 11 years apart. They adored each other when they were little and they're super close still.

I wish you the best!

 

[pixiefairy]

Go for it. I'm 12 years older than my brother and nearly 14 years older than my sister. I love them to death. I was built in babysitting for years...but I look at it as if it helped prepare me for the future, lol.

I have a 14 (almost 15) y.o. ds....then the next one didn't come until nearly 6 years later....he's 9 now. The next three are much closer together. DD 6, ds 5 and ds 3. My youngest and oldest have this cute, wonderful relationship...it's adorable really. We aren't too old to think of maybe another little one in the future...but only time will tell. Good luck!!!

 

[ZachnElli]

My kids are 15, 11, and 5 years old. We don't all get to plan our spacing now do we?! I never had any problems with jealousy, they were old enough to explain to them why things were the way they were and they could understand! LOL! My oldest wanted a little brother so bad he was thrilled and they are 9 years, 11 months and 1 day apart in age. I do have him babysit, but at 15, he wants a car (of course!) and any extra money he can get, he is more than willing! LOL! Plus, all he does is play video games with him until bedtime, like that is real suffering for a 15 year old!

 

[pigletgirl]

No kids here either....
I am the oldest of 6 siblings. I'm 21 and my baby sister will be 2 in July. I feel more like a mother/aunt than sister. My mom had her at unexpectedly at 44. People ask all the time if she's my child. It gets OLD!
FWIW, I'm very close to my 2 little brothers who are 19 and 17. We do fight.

 

[DMickey28]

My DH is 10 years older than his younger brother. His mother was a single mother who worked at least two jobs all the time so my DH had a HUGE hand in raising his younger brother. He doesn't resent it now but he did at the time. Even though they spent all that time together they do not have a great relationship now. Since there was no father figure, DH was the father figure which was fine until his brother turned into a lazy, no-drive or direction 18 year old. Now they butt heads all the time and DH tries very hard to give brotherly advice and direction but it always comes off fatherish ....

My younger DS is now 25, still living with his mom, no college, works at a gas station, no car and my MIL has to work her schedule around when he has to work or go to meetings (for his lack of car). It's really put a burden on DH's relationship with his mother because we moved back up to the NE to be closer to family and EVERYTHING is controlled by his lazy 25 year old brother. It's really rather pathetic actually ...

Obviously that has nothing to do with the age difference and I am sorry I went on a tangent ...

 

[LisaInNc]

I have an invitro baby too.

I badly want another and my DD is 9 1/2 so I know where you are coming from. It's bad baby fever!

However one thing that stops me is I remember the tears and the disappointment month after month when I didn't get pregnant. I was depressed for over a year. I don't want to go through that again. I don't want to expose my daughter to that.

How will you handle it mentally if it doesn't work?

Lisa